European-DJ
Master Don Juan
Day 4
I am starting to realize that we are probably not to be together again. This, is a "frightening" feeling, which brings forward some irrational thought that I want to act on. However, I know better than to act on impulses and I can recognize that it would be nothing but fear induced actions.
The frightening feeling might be a good thing; I guess by having acknowledged that we are not going to be together again, I can accept it. When I’ve accepted it I’ll be able to Turkey move forward and leave her behind.
Today was a difficult day, I had a strong feeling that she would reach out today (as she did last Tuesday), unfortunately I think I shattered the last bit of attraction when I was too available the last time she reached out and I reacted by trying to fix things.
I’ve been through something similar back in 2013. While I’m in a much better state of mine, I’ve caught myself in the despairs of thinking that this time it was “different” that she was “special” and “not the rule, but the exception”. Obviously I was wrong. It comes to show that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover and that’s even the cutest and most innocent looking girl will act just as poorly and without integrity as any other girl.
Hopeful my heart will start accepting what my mind has already accepted - that the only way forward is moving on.
I am starting to realize that we are probably not to be together again. This, is a "frightening" feeling, which brings forward some irrational thought that I want to act on. However, I know better than to act on impulses and I can recognize that it would be nothing but fear induced actions.
The frightening feeling might be a good thing; I guess by having acknowledged that we are not going to be together again, I can accept it. When I’ve accepted it I’ll be able to Turkey move forward and leave her behind.
Today was a difficult day, I had a strong feeling that she would reach out today (as she did last Tuesday), unfortunately I think I shattered the last bit of attraction when I was too available the last time she reached out and I reacted by trying to fix things.
I’ve been through something similar back in 2013. While I’m in a much better state of mine, I’ve caught myself in the despairs of thinking that this time it was “different” that she was “special” and “not the rule, but the exception”. Obviously I was wrong. It comes to show that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover and that’s even the cutest and most innocent looking girl will act just as poorly and without integrity as any other girl.
Hopeful my heart will start accepting what my mind has already accepted - that the only way forward is moving on.