DAY 1...
So I need an assessment of the situation because currently like most people here I have made some critical mistakes..
I have been dating this girl for a year and a half, to me she seems like the one and for a time she was made it clear i was too.. our personalities matched on every level and being around each other was just easy no effort.. I was stunned as far as looks go this chick was smoking hot and she was mine...
anyways up until a few months ago things were sweet but i let the realtionship drift and it wasnt as easy as it started.. we continued like this as we had a pretty stong bond together and loved out time together.. the real killer came from my part when her 2 friends who had left the country showed back in town. Her 2 friends who are big party animals and "maneaters" began taking her out clubbing more regualrly.. and at first i didnt think much of it as she hadnt spent much time with her friends..
her initally replies after coming home were im so tired and i really dont get why people going clubbing... i let it slip i figured shes missed her friends why not let her hang out with them...as the weeks dragged the clubbin nights became more frequent, she wanted more and more "girls nights" and her whole attitude to the nights out changed... i figured again something may be fishy but hey these are her friends...
so then thats where it all come to an end, one night she got a phone call in the middle of the night from a guy whom she met whilst out...now she swears it was nothing just someone she met and wanted to be friends with as they share mutual friends...obviously through my hurt and jealousy an argument broke out... the next day the inevitable happend.. she hit me with LJBF and "she needs space", but after she clears her head shes sure well get back together but said she did not want to give me false hopes...
intially i figured what the hell im a good dude shell know what she had soon enough but thats when it all fell apart.. after having a couple days of NC i caved and i began with AFC... i pushed hopelessly, poured out my heart like a fool as like a rookie i assumed if i showed her that im ready for her she would somehow regret her decision... after her txts became more and more cold i realised the harsh reality i was pushing to hard and forcing her away...she now goes out more often then before...
i have now found out that she openly chats to guys in clubs and on a social network site but she is strictly looking for "friends" and nothing serious as she is not ready for another relationship. she has also told me that she has moved on from but she appreciates everything i have done for her..which was alot...and she would like to be friends but not right now she needs NC for a while... this is where i have left it as of this morning i simply replied " thanks for everything, i too need my space from you, and although it dont mean i dont care what happens for you, this is goodbye for now, you have chosen to be apart and i need to learn to live without you."...her reply was " ok thanks your the best..take care"...
i know i need NC for sure but heres a couple things i need advice on..1. she has a couple of my belonginings which are quiet valuable and at some stage i would like back, how do i go about it... 2. if down the track she does msg me, do i abandon ship as i have already gone down the AFC path and blew it.. 3. she moved in with her friends but when i last left i still noticed all our pictures of being together are still up on the wall...4. she has not removed any pics of us together from facebook, do i a) delete her for a period now that i am weak... b) remove the pics of us together...c) do nothing let it simmer...
any tips will be helpful...and i would prefer brutal honesty as i think i need a tough reality check as i do not want to slip back into the love sick fool who couldnt stand on his own 2 feet again..