Why are there so many dudes in the PUA/Game community that don't have their sh*t together?

[Isildur1]

I think a smaller percentage of physicians are very successful with women. The majority of physicians appear to be married beta males.



I've never heard of an instance of a social circle trying to set up an introduction between a physician and an overweight woman.

Definitely agree - most my doctor friends are just stuck in **** relationships or just take what apps give them-

when meeting wingmen through pua the biggest the Most successful wingmen I met had status and were interesting but they weren’t egotistical enough to let rejection get the better of them- they were still proactive and still worked hard to make new social connections whilst having good status/ value.

most men fail because they have one but not the other. Med students spend their life around screens hustling then are too tired to go out and meet people or they see pua as a scam and never even think about it so they get entrapped in a ****ty relationship or whatever the bumble gods give them

 

[GoodMan32]

That's because folks who work want to relax after work, and not work a second job in macking chicks; the unemployed don't work much, so they can waste time macking.

Well-said. By the time I get home from work, I barely have enough time to get done everything that needs to be done. No way do I have the time/energy to go out and mack.

 

[GoodMan32]

I got into the PUA community because I had a difficult time picking up chicks. PUA did not help, other than help give me confidence to talk to women I was a total stranger to - now I talk to such women but still ultimately get rejected.

When I first moved to my current state, I did some daygame. Got me nowhere (The most I ever got was a woman who agreed to come over...with a male friend accompanying her. Needless to say, there was no action. And while she was over, she compared me to Jeffrey Dahmer)

 

[SW15]

I think a smaller percentage of physicians are very successful with women. The majority of physicians appear to be married beta males.

most my doctor friends are just stuck in **** relationships or just take what apps give them-

You may be more well connected with physicians than I am. When I think about the physicians and dentists that I know, I've mainly interacted with physicians and dentists that are married males and typically beta. There are still plenty of older doctors (45+) out there that are married men and have been married for 20+ years.

Another common thing that happens is that doctors end up in relationships with nurses/medical assistants that they meet on the job or through their job (professional networks). It typically works something like this. A doctor gets married to someone he met earlier in life (before med school graduation) and that marriage is on the rocks or the divorce has already happened. He'll end up with some nurse/medical assistant that's either never married or her own marriage has faltered. The doctor and the nurse end up together.

A similar thing can happen in dentistry as well. A dentist sees their pre-dental school graduation relationship falter and ends up with a dental assistant/dental hygienist he meets on the job or through the job. He has status with them.

Most doctors/dentists do not have a lot of free time. Approaching strangers in general is inefficient and you're not likely to see a never married younger (under 40) doctor or dentist going and doing daygame sessions at a mall or outdoor walking path/park on a weekend. Some dentists are also practice operators who are also involved in the business operations of the dental practice. That takes up time when they aren't seeing patients. Doctors and dentists might swipe on apps or occasionally go to bars but they aren't going to have as much time for approaching new people or even swiping a bunch as some people in other professions.

Doctors and dentists can rely on money/status a bit and that might help them on the first dates that they arrange. They aren't going to spend as much time prospecting for those first dates as some others. That's true for both the younger, never married doctors/dentists and the middle aged + divorced doctors/dentists.

Doctors and dentists do tend to have their lives more in order than a lot of men who have more free time to do pickup related activities though.

the Most successful wingmen I met had status and were interesting but they weren’t egotistical enough to let rejection get the better of them- they were still proactive and still worked hard to make new social connections whilst having good status/ value.

That's a good combination.

most men fail because they have one but not the other. Med students spend their life around screens hustling then are too tired to go out and meet people or they see pua as a scam and never even think about it so they get entrapped in a ****ty relationship or whatever the bumble gods give them

Blue collar men, service sector men, and white collar men with less demanding roles can be well positioned for success. It comes down to their looks and attitudes.

I agree that most men don't have both money/status and the proactivity with their free time to make the right social connections. Doctors, dentists, scientists, engineers, and a lot of middle management + business types have the money/status but lack the proactivity in their free time. Blue collar and service sector men have the proactivity with their free time but often lack money/status.

I did some daygame. Got me nowhere

I'm not surprised in the slightest to read that.

Daygame (non-bar approaching) is quite inefficient even for a man with fewer obstacles than you have.

The best non-bar approachers are tall (6'0"+), fit/muscular, and have strong social skills.

Tall and fit/muscular matters most in non-bar approaching but strong social skills matter more in non-bar approaching than they do in certain other venues. In non-bar approaching, a 5'9"-5'11" guy can stand out more on his personality than he would stand out in a tech-based method. Most average height, middle of the bell curve on fitness guys will do better with non-bar approaching than on the apps. They can use their personalities to some degree to offset the lack of height.

The main difference between non-bar approaching and swipe apps is that the rejection is in real time. On swipe apps, the rejections are virtual and you don't ever see them. In non-bar approaching, the rejections happen either softly (a conversation fizzles out in less than 30 seconds) or harshly (you get a direct rejection).

Both non-bar approaching and swipe apps are inefficient and often ineffective. With the swipe apps, you're taking rejections while sitting at home doing nothing and not dressed. For non-bar approaching, you have to go out into the real world, make yourself presentable, and then do the approaches in some way.

I got into the PUA community because I had a difficult time picking up chicks. PUA did not help, other than help give me confidence to talk to women I was a total stranger to - now I talk to such women but still ultimately get rejected.

You had a difficult time picking up women mainly due to being 5'5". Had you been 6'1", you would have had one fewer obstacle. Another major obstacle that you had is that you are a STEM worker with middling at best social skills. STEM workers rarely have a lot of charisma. Being short and lacking charisma hurts a lot. You would have to be incredibly fit (10-12% body fat, good muscle definition) to offset being a 5'5" man who is a STEM worker or a STEM worker with a very high income/net worth.

Part of the reason that you were able to develop the skill of talking to women is that you grew up in the 1980s before screen time really took over. STEM guys whose formative years were in the late 1990s or later are far more tech dependent than you were growing up. You were fortunate to grow up in a far more analog world.

5'5" and STEM background makes things very difficult. While you made personality improvements with confidence and other attributes, it wasn't going to be enough.

PUA tactics do fail for a lot of men, even men who have fewer obstacles than you've had.

 

[corrector]

I got into the PUA community because I had a difficult time picking up chicks. PUA did not help, other than help give me confidence to talk to women I was a total stranger to - now I talk to such women but still ultimately get rejected.

Snake eyes. Cant control the dice in the end.

 

[MatureDJ]

Snake eyes. Cant control the dice in the end.

It's OVER for CrapsCels.

 

[MatureDJ]

Most doctors/dentists do not have a lot of free time. Approaching strangers in general is inefficient and you're not likely to see a never married younger (under 40) doctor or dentist going and doing daygame sessions at a mall or outdoor walking path/park on a weekend. Some dentists are also practice operators who are also involved in the business operations of the dental practice. That takes up time when they aren't seeing patients. Doctors and dentists might swipe on apps or occasionally go to bars but they aren't going to have as much time for approaching new people or even swiping a bunch as some people in other professions.

It's quite the clown world to even think that someone that is worth so much to society (i.e., based on all the training, and as measured by compensation - with some help from the credential-rentier guilds of the AMA/ADA, etc.) is supposed to waste time on something as ridiculous as PUA/Game. Yet, that is where we are.

You had a difficult time picking up women mainly due to being 5'5". Had you been 6'1", you would have had one fewer obstacle. Another major obstacle that you had is that you are a STEM worker with middling at best social skills. STEM workers rarely have a lot of charisma. Being short and lacking charisma hurts a lot. You would have to be incredibly fit (10-12% body fat, good muscle definition) to offset being a 5'5" man who is a STEM worker or a STEM worker with a very high income/net worth.

Part of the reason that you were able to develop the skill of talking to women is that you grew up in the 1980s before screen time really took over. STEM guys whose formative years were in the late 1990s or later are far more tech dependent than you were growing up. You were fortunate to grow up in a far more analog world.

5'5" and STEM background makes things very difficult. While you made personality improvements with confidence and other attributes, it wasn't going to be enough.

PUA tactics do fail for a lot of men, even men who have fewer obstacles than you've had.

Actually, I have been told that I don't seem to be in a STEM field, which I would take as being relatively charismatic. But "charisma" alone is not enough. The movie "Whatever" is great at showing how it's been OVER "from the start" for the charismatic Raphael (he is always striking up conversations with groups where there are women, but he still will never be a young woman's erotic dream, so wonderfully portrayed in that all-time blackpill scene where the realities of his situation had finally hit home with him - I think the actor was 155 cm ).

I've developed the skill of talking to women from the position of hunger - having ZERO social circle in all-male middle/high school, and then a STEM program that should be called Sausage Engineering, and a career that was just as much sausage has meant I've had to earn every morsel of poon the hard way. I learned early on that it's always the fat chicks that folks are always trying to pawn off on me - as the decent chicks never seem to be "looking for someone" enough for them to have friends try and set them up, at least with me.

I'm tired.

 

[MatureDJ]

When I first moved to my current state, I did some daygame. Got me nowhere (The most I ever got was a woman who agreed to come over...with a male friend accompanying her. Needless to say, there was no action. And while she was over, she compared me to Jeffrey Dahmer)

Wow, she demanded that you ChaperoneMax. That comment about Dahmer might have been a complement, what with the way that chicks dig psychopaths.

 

[MatureDJ]

Service volunteering can be a path...

I had once looked into that. Yeegads, every chick was fat, and I was looked upon as "fresh meat". This was one of the first times that I had an inkling about what a clown world we are in.

 

[MatureDJ]

I think a smaller percentage of physicians are very successful with women. The majority of physicians appear to be married beta males.



I've never heard of an instance of a social circle trying to set up an introduction between a physician and an overweight woman.

I have.

 

[SW15]

I have been told that I don't seem to be in a STEM field, which I would take as being relatively charismatic. But "charisma" alone is not enough.

It typically would not be enough at your height. Sometimes, there are outlier guys. Neil Strauss is a common example of a shorter guy (5'6") who turned himself into a master seducer by spending time with Mystery and other PUAs. Strauss is considered an outlier in the seduction community for his outcomes.

I am aware of other men with good seduction outcomes with below average heights. I consider those men to be outliers.

I've seen women treat me like dog poop for my average height. I can't imagine what it is like for the shorter than average men.

I've developed the skill of talking to women from the position of hunger - having ZERO social circle in all-male middle/high school, and then a STEM program that should be called Sausage Engineering, and a career that was just as much sausage has meant I've had to earn every morsel of poon the hard way.

Besides height, you were dealt a bad hand.

I didn't realize that you were all male in both middle and high school. I thought it was just high school. I've interacted with males who attended all male schools for high schools. It takes a lot to be successful in mating if your high school is all male. At a minimum, a guy in an all male high school needs to be above average looking + have a good social circle from when he went to co-ed schools in K-8. Without both those factors, dating is going to be VERY difficult in high school for him and that can have a long term impact. I think your social circle from elementary school was weak when you entered the all male school + the height issue. That's a recipe for disaster.

Going from an all male school into a STEM major in a co-ed college isn't going to help. Few girls in classes. You would have had to be very involved in campus clubs where females were present, be in a good fraternity, or know where the good off campus parties were with females. That's not easy.

You have had to earn poon the hard way. Doing that for 40+ years stinks.

I learned early on that it's always the fat chicks that folks are always trying to pawn off on me - as the decent chicks never seem to be "looking for someone" enough for them to have friends try and set them up, at least with me.

I have seen some social circle setups where the woman wasn't fat.

I've rarely received introductions. There was a time when a female I know texted me about a setup. I found out in texting that the woman was fat and slightly older than me, both of which are dealbreakers for me. I refused the setup and indicated my lack of interest. It's good that you refused fat female setups too.

It is offensive to receive fat female setup offers.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I'm tired.

Switch off your computer, go to bed, don't switch it on again.