Why are there so many dudes in the PUA/Game community that don't have their sh*t together?

[MatureDJ]

I think a smaller percentage of physicians are very successful with women. The majority of physicians appear to be married beta males.



I've never heard of an instance of a social circle trying to set up an introduction between a physician and an overweight woman.

I have.

 

[SW15]

I have been told that I don't seem to be in a STEM field, which I would take as being relatively charismatic. But "charisma" alone is not enough.

It typically would not be enough at your height. Sometimes, there are outlier guys. Neil Strauss is a common example of a shorter guy (5'6") who turned himself into a master seducer by spending time with Mystery and other PUAs. Strauss is considered an outlier in the seduction community for his outcomes.

I am aware of other men with good seduction outcomes with below average heights. I consider those men to be outliers.

I've seen women treat me like dog poop for my average height. I can't imagine what it is like for the shorter than average men.

I've developed the skill of talking to women from the position of hunger - having ZERO social circle in all-male middle/high school, and then a STEM program that should be called Sausage Engineering, and a career that was just as much sausage has meant I've had to earn every morsel of poon the hard way.

Besides height, you were dealt a bad hand.

I didn't realize that you were all male in both middle and high school. I thought it was just high school. I've interacted with males who attended all male schools for high schools. It takes a lot to be successful in mating if your high school is all male. At a minimum, a guy in an all male high school needs to be above average looking + have a good social circle from when he went to co-ed schools in K-8. Without both those factors, dating is going to be VERY difficult in high school for him and that can have a long term impact. I think your social circle from elementary school was weak when you entered the all male school + the height issue. That's a recipe for disaster.

Going from an all male school into a STEM major in a co-ed college isn't going to help. Few girls in classes. You would have had to be very involved in campus clubs where females were present, be in a good fraternity, or know where the good off campus parties were with females. That's not easy.

You have had to earn poon the hard way. Doing that for 40+ years stinks.

I learned early on that it's always the fat chicks that folks are always trying to pawn off on me - as the decent chicks never seem to be "looking for someone" enough for them to have friends try and set them up, at least with me.

I have seen some social circle setups where the woman wasn't fat.

I've rarely received introductions. There was a time when a female I know texted me about a setup. I found out in texting that the woman was fat and slightly older than me, both of which are dealbreakers for me. I refused the setup and indicated my lack of interest. It's good that you refused fat female setups too.

It is offensive to receive fat female setup offers.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I'm tired.

Switch off your computer, go to bed, don't switch it on again.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Because they are spending all their time and energy on picking up women instead of spending their time and energy on getting their sh!t together which in turn would make it much more likely women would come to them.

 

[MatureDJ]

Because they are spending all their time and energy on picking up women instead of spending their time and energy on getting their sh!t together which in turn would make it much more likely women would come to them.

I don't think there is necessarily a payoff to becoming a good provider anymore - other than to a garbage dating prospect like a single mommy.

 

[SW15]

I don't think there is necessarily a payoff to becoming a good provider anymore - other than to a garbage dating prospect like a single mommy.

That's my perception as well. In 2023-2024, we had thread about men making above average provider incomes having difficulties with attraction/seduction. The salary range discussed here in that thread was $75,000 - $125,000, but I think it could be extended up to $149,999.

Women Don't Want a Semi-Successful Man

Men in this category, $75k-$125k salary, relatively in shape, drive a good car, has a few hobbies, women do not want. Why? Because this man has standards. Women do not want to work for their men. Women of today want a simp or a millionaire. Simple as that. This is what society aka social media...

www.sosuave.net

There are plenty of provider type single guys in their 30s/early 40s making $90,000 - $149,999 in larger USA cities that are struggling to date conventionally.

Why is a man with an above average salary but not exceptional struggling to date conventionally?

It's because a good portion of women don't value the provider male anymore.

In the USA market, let's think about who is typically a 30s-40s guy making $90,000 - $149,999. It's typically a White male with a bachelor's degree + who is most interested in dating White females with a bachelor's degree +.

These White females in his age range with bachelor's degrees + and who are childless hare often making good enough salaries to support themselves and the guy with the $110,000 annual salary isn't anything special. Because an above average but not exceptional male salary isn't that important to the bougie, childless White woman, she can focus on chasing the 85th-90th percentile guy in looks who also gives her "all the feels". White women under 30 also aren't going to be impressed with the $90,000 - $149,999 earning guy to go chase a bigger age difference (7-15 years).

The only White women that might value the provider White male type are ones who are single moms who haven't prioritized a career to the same degree as a childless woman. The White single mom is often a divorcee and she may/may not have a bachelor's degree or a trade certificate.

 

[MatureDJ]

The only White women that might value the provider White male type are ones who are single moms who haven't prioritized a career to the same degree as a childless woman. The White single mom is often a divorcee and she may/may not have a bachelor's degree or a trade certificate.

Even if the single mommy has a career, she still wants another financial leg supporting her brood-stool.

 

[SW15]

Even if the single mommy has a career, she still wants another financial leg supporting her brood-stool.

Maybe, maybe not. It depends on how things are going in her career and how much money she gets from her ex.

 

[MatureDJ]

Maybe, maybe not. It depends on how things are going in her career and how much money she gets from her ex.

That's true - if she's AlimonyMaxxing, she'll be CougarMaxxing.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I don't think there is necessarily a payoff to becoming a good provider anymore - other than to a garbage dating prospect like a single mommy.

Getting your sh!t together is something you do for your own benefit, not for women.
And it doesn't mean you become a 'provider'.
You may need to see an eye doctor, ImmatureDJ, you may not even notice how myopic you have become.

 

[GoodMan32]

Wow, she demanded that you ChaperoneMax. That comment about Dahmer might have been a complement, what with the way that chicks dig psychopaths.

You're right, it could have been a compliment under some circumstances.

The fact I had nothing further with her after her chaperoned visit, however, would suggest the Dahmer comment was an insult.

 

[GoodMan32]

It typically would not be enough at your height. Sometimes, there are outlier guys. Neil Strauss is a common example of a shorter guy (5'6") who turned himself into a master seducer by spending time with Mystery and other PUAs. Strauss is considered an outlier in the seduction community for his outcomes.

I am aware of other men with good seduction outcomes with below average heights. I consider those men to be outliers.

I've seen women treat me like dog poop for my average height. I can't imagine what it is like for the shorter than average men.



Besides height, you were dealt a bad hand.

I didn't realize that you were all male in both middle and high school. I thought it was just high school. I've interacted with males who attended all male schools for high schools. It takes a lot to be successful in mating if your high school is all male. At a minimum, a guy in an all male high school needs to be above average looking + have a good social circle from when he went to co-ed schools in K-8. Without both those factors, dating is going to be VERY difficult in high school for him and that can have a long term impact. I think your social circle from elementary school was weak when you entered the all male school + the height issue. That's a recipe for disaster.

Going from an all male school into a STEM major in a co-ed college isn't going to help. Few girls in classes. You would have had to be very involved in campus clubs where females were present, be in a good fraternity, or know where the good off campus parties were with females. That's not easy.

You have had to earn poon the hard way. Doing that for 40+ years stinks.



I have seen some social circle setups where the woman wasn't fat.

I've rarely received introductions. There was a time when a female I know texted me about a setup. I found out in texting that the woman was fat and slightly older than me, both of which are dealbreakers for me. I refused the setup and indicated my lack of interest. It's good that you refused fat female setups too.

It is offensive to receive fat female setup offers.

We're similar in height. Interestingly, I never recall my height being the reason broads have treated me poorly. Possibly because of all the other baggage I have working against me.

 

[GoodMan32]

That's true - if she's AlimonyMaxxing, she'll be CougarMaxxing.

CougarMaxxing, eh?

I prefer cougars.

 

[Manure Spherian]

That's because folks who work want to relax after work, and not work a second job in macking chicks; the unemployed don't work much, so they can waste time macking.

They’re actually why I said, for getting women, being unemployed is better than working a low-paying job. However, in some cases, what’s best for getting women isn’t best for one’s life (eg, criminality, daredevil activity, using drugs, acting like a clown, couch surging, drinking, being a misunderstood sad sack, being a rule breaker).

 

[SW15]

I never recall my height being the reason broads have treated me poorly. Possibly because of all the other baggage I have working against me.

You're probably getting eliminated on other things besides height. Being under 6'0" doesn't help your cause either.

 

[MatureDJ]

You're probably getting eliminated on other things besides height. Being under 6'0" doesn't help your cause either.

So for someone 5'5" who gets leg-lengthening of 6", it's still OVER for him?

 

[SW15]

So for someone 5'5" who gets leg-lengthening of 6", it's still OVER for him?

The consideration of leg lengthening is a desperate measure. I can see why someone in the 5'3"-5'7" range would consider doing. That said, most males in that height range don't end up doing it.

The general standard that most women are seeking in the mating market today is 6'0", especially if they are White women in the USA. The closer to 6'0", the better. I can tell you with my experiences over the years that White women (most of the women I interact with) have not been celebrating my 5'10" height.

 

[The Duke]

OK, so how is a sausage supposed to be invited to a Private Boat party unless he owns the boat?

He is social, fun, in good shape, hangs out with attractive women, and likes to party. I've done it several times. Ive even made friends with complete strangers at party cove and been invited to hang out on their yacht with all the hotties any time I wanted.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

He is social, fun, in good shape, hangs out with attractive women, and likes to party. I've done it several times. Ive even made friends with complete strangers at party cove and been invited to hang out on their yacht with all the hotties any time I wanted.

Being fun company gets you invited everywhere.

 

[Salvation]

Not my experience that pua's didn't have their life in order.. the people i know that had balls to approach also were go-getters in life.