The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[Renegade357]

Day 28:

I was due to go on a date tonight, but I've had to cancel. My head isn't in the right place and I feel like I need more time.

OMG dude, this is a serious case of oneitis. Don't be cancelling dates for some trifling girl who doesn't like you. You're going to get over her eventually might as well be now. When you hit day 60 the thought of re-uniting with your ex will not only seem unappealing but also impractical. She doesn't deserve to have you and there are way better women out there. Go on your dates!!

 

[clair]

hi its been two months since no contact and I feel like I want to contact him since he hasn't contact me. I am mad has hell because he has moved on so quickly I hate his guts and I want to tell him so and plus this online dating is not working it seems these idiots just want to send messages back and forth instead of meeting in person **** THAT u ****ing computer GEEKY COWARDS!!!!!!!

 

[Renegade357]

hi its been two months since no contact and I feel like I want to contact him since he hasn't contact me. I am mad has hell because he has moved on so quickly I hate his guts and I want to tell him so and plus this online dating is not working it seems these idiots just want to send messages back and forth instead of meeting in person **** THAT u ****ing computer GEEKY COWARDS!!!!!!!

Uhh, you're a chick. Use your womanly powers of flirtation and seduction. Gets them every time.

 

[soulforge]

hey i,ve already been on two dates since i sacked that ex slutt of mine...

they wasn't much crop, as in they didnt excite me much... but they was nice ladies... which made me realize what a nasty piece of trash my ex was

i intend to carry on dating & get laid as much as possible...

 

[soulforge]

She has already ****ed him, a long time ago. No need to dwell on it. It's what wh0res like this do.

she got his number one week after i dumped her ass... so we wasn't together when she got his number... maybe she has.. maybe she hasn't

but in my eye's she's a fu@king ***** either way

and you don't cry or lose sleep over a ***** do you... no

 

[Jariel]

OMG dude, this is a serious case of oneitis. Don't be cancelling dates for some trifling girl who doesn't like you. You're going to get over her eventually might as well be now. When you hit day 60 the thought of re-uniting with your ex will not only seem unappealing but also impractical. She doesn't deserve to have you and there are way better women out there. Go on your dates!!

I know mate, but I really don't have the motivation to talk to these women at the moment. I wish I did. It would make life so much easier if I could just start dating again, have some casual sex and maybe see where things go with one of my better prospects.

I'm really holding out for the day I genuinely feel over her. I'm getting a taste of that from time to time and it feels good and I'm hit with this great sense of optimisim and enthusiasm, but then it seems to fade away again.

All part of the process I guess, but yes, I have a serious case of oneitis. Until just a month ago, this was the woman I was planning to spend my life with.

 

[soulforge]

I know mate, but I really don't have the motivation to talk to these women at the moment. I wish I did. It would make life so much easier if I could just start dating again, have some casual sex and maybe see where things go with one of my better prospects.

I'm really holding out for the day I genuinely feel over her. I'm getting a taste of that from time to time and it feels good and I'm hit with this great sense of optimisim and enthusiasm, but then it seems to fade away again.

All part of the process I guess, but yes, I have a serious case of oneitis. Until just a month ago, this was the woman I was planning to spend my life with.

in your own pace jariel... sometimes when you start dating a little too soon, it can make you start missing your ex even more... i used to be like that

so take it in your pace till your ready mate...

i on the other hand intend to f@ck as many woman as possible, because serioulsy i dont give that much of a f@ck about my ex

she was trash big time... and trash is not that difficult to replace

 

[JoeyBrown202]

3 days, wow I didn't think I'd make it this far. 1/20th of the way there.

 

[Blazing]

Guys I have a questions. So 2 days into NC I feel pretty good for the most part. A new sense of freedom. But when I came back to campus today I keep feeling this anxiety about when I'll run into her. On top of always thinking about our relationship and if I'd done things differently maybe things would be different even the problems that seemed big at the time just don't seem as big anymore. Maybe I was part of the problem.

Are thoughts like this normal? It's really been getting me down lately. It seems like everything reminds me of her

 

[BlackgumL]

The thing is, I don't need to act as if because I do have these options and have plenty of chicks waiting for me to get over my ex. Many would say I'm one of the lucky ones, but while I'm still getting over my ex, sex with another woman would not make me any happier.

I know you have good intentions and at some point, everything you say will click and we'll be back in the game, but trying to get over a long term girlfriend with another chick is like having a family member die and then trying to find a replacement.

It's more than just sex you lost, it's a person...and probably the closest person in your life.

Since this thread is blanketed with platitudes let me throw a few more out there. You will see it WHEN you believe it. You get what you expect. Like attracts like.

If you'd rather act is if you are a whiney crybaby then so be it. No amount of no contact hiding from the truth is going to change the fact that this WILL HAPPEN over and over again. Blame the woman all you want, hell blame them all...just remember a relationship is a mirror. I have to go now....I am going to get laid by a person and she will be the closest person in my life for all of those 10-15 minutes

 

[BlackgumL]

Answer the question, Clair...

hi its been two months since no contact and I feel like I want to contact him since he hasn't contact me. I am mad has hell because he has moved on so quickly I hate his guts and I want to tell him so and plus this online dating is not working it seems these idiots just want to send messages back and forth instead of meeting in person **** THAT u ****ing computer GEEKY COWARDS!!!!!!!

Are you a virgin, Clair? Just answer the question...

Seriously, it's a big world out there. Wanna fly out to Colorado?

 

[Jariel]

Here's an exercise that I decided to try last night and really helped.

Try writing down, in detail, what your future with your ex would be like. Picture yourself in that relationship 6 months in and ask yourself realistically what it would be like on your average days. Focus on the irritations, lack of freedom, pressure and other negatives that were starting to show towards the end...because that's how your relationship would most likely continue.

And, of course, affection and passion always starts to die down long term. So does the laughter and joking. So does the sense of adventure. So do all those deep and meaningful conversations, days and nights out. And don't forget to picture her in her "comfy clothes" without make up, because that's how you'll be seeing her most of your time together. Perhaps you should picture her with a little extra weight and unshaven legs too, because 6 months is plenty of time for her to get complacent about these things...and if you went running back to her after she dumped you, then she knows it doesn't take much effort to keep you.

I was only half way through this exercise and I felt like such relief that our relationship ended. I felt glad to move on without ever hearing from her again.

Another aspect of this exercise is to write how your future would be without your ex and consider all the possibilities and all the freedom you have, how you plan to re-invent or improve yourself, various chicks you could score with, how nice it'll be to date again and experience first kisses, sex and the honeymoon period.

Every time you start to miss your ex, remind yourself what you've written and be grateful for the relationship ending.

 

[soulforge]

Here's an exercise that I decided to try last night and really helped.

Try writing down, in detail, what your future with your ex would be like. Picture yourself in that relationship 6 months in and ask yourself realistically what it would be like on your average days. Focus on the irritations, lack of freedom, pressure and other negatives that were starting to show towards the end...because that's how your relationship would most likely continue.

And, of course, affection and passion always starts to die down long term. So does the laughter and joking. So does the sense of adventure. So do all those deep and meaningful conversations, days and nights out. And don't forget to picture her in her "comfy clothes" without make up, because that's how you'll be seeing her most of your time together. Perhaps you should picture her with a little extra weight and unshaven legs too, because 6 months is plenty of time for her to get complacent about these things...and if you went running back to her after she dumped you, then she knows it doesn't take much effort to keep you.

I was only half way through this exercise and I felt like such relief that our relationship ended. I felt glad to move on without ever hearing from her again.

Another aspect of this exercise is to write how your future would be without your ex and consider all the possibilities and all the freedom you have, how you plan to re-invent or improve yourself, various chicks you could score with, how nice it'll be to date again and experience first kisses, sex and the honeymoon period.

Every time you start to miss your ex, remind yourself what you've written and be grateful for the relationship ending.

jariel i like this post... i have done this exact same thing myself.

i wrote down how i imagine my life would be like, just a few years down the line with the ex.

seriously it's a scarey f@cking thought... i can imagine myself at the age of 40 kicking a can down the road... with nothing to show for my life... other than scars!

wasting my time helping to bring up her kids from other men... in the end it doesn't work out & i am showed the f@cking door

i know what my ex wants... this woman wants rescuing... she is 46 years old, with lots of baggage

she has no real career or job prospects... she lives on state benefits & child support money from her ex.

she cannot give me kids or a family of my own!

other than her vagina & fading looks & a horrible attitude she has nothing to offer....

guys do not make this mistake with single mothers with lots of baggage, especialy is she has npd, narcassit traits

woman like this will destroy you...

i watched the movie "CASINO" last night, just to remind me how a evil toxic woman can destroy your life

 

[clair]

hey I have done the 60 days I started this challenge strong now I feel as if am becoming weak I am depressed ex have not contact me sometimes I feel as if I should contact him but I fight the urge when am I going to feel as if I am over it I know it is now my ego at play here ... I am going for another 60 days starting to day even though I haven't broken the no contact rule..this time I am doing it to get completely and utterly over him lets see what happens I also might be feeling depressed b cause the dating sites are not working just a bunch of duds

 

[itdude]

hey I have done the 60 days I started this challenge strong now I feel as if am becoming weak I am depressed ex have not contact me sometimes I feel as if I should contact him but I fight the urge when am I going to feel as if I am over it I know it is now my ego at play here ... I am going for another 60 days starting to day even though I haven't broken the no contact rule..this time I am doing it to get completely and utterly over him lets see what happens I also might be feeling depressed b cause the dating sites are not working just a bunch of duds

Try not to idealize your past relationship just because of loneliness. You have done well so far so keep at it. Patience.

 

[Renegade357]

I feel as if am becoming weak I am depressed ex have not contact me sometimes I feel as if I should contact him

You don't want them to contact you. You will feel worse trust me. Mine facebook messaged me out of the blue last week for first time in like 6 weeks. She asked me if I wanted baseball tickets that I left at her place. (We were going to go together.) Said for me to let her know and that she would mail them to me. Was a little bit of a setback mentally.

Am I supposed to respond in this situation? I don't really care about the game so I ignored her.

 

[soulforge]

You don't want them to contact you. You will feel worse trust me. Mine emailed me out of the blue last week for first time in like 6 weeks. She asked me if I wanted baseball tickets that I left at her place. (We were going to go together.) Said for me to let her know and that she would mail them to me. Was a little bit of a setback mentally.

Am I supposed to respond in this situation? I don't really care about the game so I ignored her.

mate it's best if you block her from contacting you in anyway...

i have changed my mobile number... got rid of my email account...

so she cannot contact me, so no way she can set me back

 

[Renegade357]

mate it's best if you block her from contacting you in anyway...

i have changed my mobile number... got rid of my email account...

so she cannot contact me, so no way she can set me back

Yeah, I want to block her on FB but at this point it seems a bit childish. She's already hidden from my news feed so I never see her stuff. Didn't expect her to use that to talk to me. We never talked via facebook so its a bit strange.

 

[soulforge]

Yeah, I want to block her on FB but at this point it seems a bit childish. She's already hidden from my news feed so I never see her stuff. Didn't expect her to use that to talk to me. We never talked via facebook so its a bit strange.

everything they say & do after a break up is "strange" you will question anything & everything she does

put yourself into complete isolation... she does not exist & you have quite simply vanished

this is the quickest way to heal mate


my ex cannot contact me in any shape way or form... hell for all i know, she could be wanting to talk about things etc etc

but f@ck what she thinks or wants right now... your whole purpose now shouldbe to remove yourself from her & heal...

 

[Renegade357]

but f@ck what she thinks or wants right now... your whole purpose now shouldbe to remove yourself from her & heal...

Yeah, thanks. I've done well. Handled the breakup well and NC too. It's been long enough to where I've moved forward, started dating again. I have been hitting the gym, travelling a lot, drinking with friends, playing flag football. Lots of good stuff. This was a little bit of a setback but I feel much better about it now.