What would you estimate your rejection rate is?

[BaronOfHair]

If you want to know about rejection, try getting a book published

Or get on stage at open mic night, and deliberately give a sh-tty performance. You learn that getting rejected is only as emotionally painful as you allow it to be

 

[GoodMan32]

Yeah if you could being friendzoned as a W. To me, it has to go beyond dating. There has to be sex at the minimum. Getting a number don't count. I got a woman's number off Bumble, got no response to text or phonecall, messaged her a pic of me and someone I was piping out and said I hooked up with a woman who actually answered my phonecalls. And I unmatched the girl before she unmatched me. I do the same to one-phonecall wonders.

When I get a first date that never leads to a 2nd date, it's not because I was friend-zoned. It's because the woman ended up hating me. Or in rare cases, it could be that I lost interest.

If I can so much as get a woman to show up to the 1st date, even if nothing further comes after our 1st date, that's a major success to me (sometimes they lose interest before the first date even happens)

 

[GoodMan32]

Stop worrying about your rates of rejection, and start focusing on the times you achieve your goal

I've only had free sex 17 times (and first had sex over a decade ago). I'd hardly call that achieving my goal.

 

[GoodMan32]

If you want to know about rejection, try getting a book published.

Getting rejected by some floozy is really nothing worth contemplating.

I'd rather get rejected by a publisher than a broad.

 

[GoodMan32]

Who cares. This isn't baseball.

Rejection is not real. I repeat, rejection is not real. You are probably infusing a woman not selecting you in that moment with more power than it can possibly have.

There are so many variables at play - timing, availability, the interaction, what's happening in life - that even if you were to make a stat sheet it would explain less than nothing. It's not the same as swinging and missing because it was a slider.

The problem is most guys bring their work analytics into their social life and believe that thinking like a man will get them on a woman's wavelength. Ride the wave, fellas.

With my history with the ladies, a rejection carries a lot of power.

 

[SW15]

When I get a first date that never leads to a 2nd date, it's not because I was friend-zoned. It's because the woman ended up hating me.

That's common. I highly doubt that they hate you, it's more dislike than anything.

The vast majority of 1st dates that don't result in 2nd dates don't lead to any platonic friendship. The woman usually doesn't want a platonic friendship after that 1-2 hour first date and the man usually isn't desiring any sort of friendship either.

Having no female friends isn't much of a sign of anything.

I've only had free sex 17 times (and first had sex over a decade ago). I'd hardly call that achieving my goal.

Don't call it "free sex". Almost all sex is paid, either directly or indirectly. Conventional dating is the better term for it as compared to free sex vs. paid sex.

Plenty of men dating a woman conventionally are paying for her expenses. Plenty of men will partially cover a woman's rent or help with car payments in exchange for sex in a conventional relationship. This isn't even a relationship based on "sugar dating" from Seeking either.

Men are buying luxury brand items for themselves in order to get laid from conventional sex. This is quite common with luxury car brands, luxury clothing/accessories (Rolex is a common purchase for this), and some other purchases. Men engage in consumerist behavior for the purposes of pounding vagina through conventional dating.

Your results with conventional dating are lackluster and that's frustrating to you. A quantity count of 9 partners is a good quantity count and actually higher than a lot of men's lifetime quantity count. Your big problem is taking your quantity into frequency/regularity. 9 partners and 17 times having sex lifetime from conventional dating isn't good.

 

[CornbreadFed]

depends on the situation

 

[BaronOfHair]

I've only had free sex 17 times (and first had sex over a decade ago). I'd hardly call that achieving my goal.

You make a choice to think in such terms, rather than: "I've had free sex 17 times. What steps can I take to expand that number to 18 now"

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I'd rather get rejected by a publisher than a broad.

Getting rejected for accomplishments is infinitely harder than being rejected by any woman. You wouldn't know, of course.

 

[GoodMan32]

That's common. I highly doubt that they hate you, it's more dislike than anything.

The vast majority of 1st dates that don't result in 2nd dates don't lead to any platonic friendship. The woman usually doesn't want a platonic friendship after that 1-2 hour first date and the man usually isn't desiring any sort of friendship either.

Having no female friends isn't much of a sign of anything.



Don't call it "free sex". Almost all sex is paid, either directly or indirectly. Conventional dating is the better term for it as compared to free sex vs. paid sex.

Plenty of men dating a woman conventionally are paying for her expenses. Plenty of men will partially cover a woman's rent or help with car payments in exchange for sex in a conventional relationship. This isn't even a relationship based on "sugar dating" from Seeking either.

Men are buying luxury brand items for themselves in order to get laid from conventional sex. This is quite common with luxury car brands, luxury clothing/accessories (Rolex is a common purchase for this), and some other purchases. Men engage in consumerist behavior for the purposes of pounding vagina through conventional dating.

Your results with conventional dating are lackluster and that's frustrating to you. A quantity count of 9 partners is a good quantity count and actually higher than a lot of men's lifetime quantity count. Your big problem is taking your quantity into frequency/regularity. 9 partners and 17 times having sex lifetime from conventional dating isn't good.

I know you've explained before how a lot of so-called "free" sex is really paid for indirectly.

As shocking as this might sound (for a guy with all my baggage), however, a lot of the "free" sex I've had really was 100% free. Here's where it gets even more shocking: Broads would drive to come bang me when I was in college. No date required. All I had to do was post Craigslist ads...and then the fish would bite.

That being said, while my strategy back then got me a decent amount of one night stands, I ran into the problem you pointed out: Hard time getting consistent lays from the same woman.

9 free partners and 17 lays averages out to a little less than 2 lays per woman.

 

[GoodMan32]

That's common. I highly doubt that they hate you, it's more dislike than anything.

The vast majority of 1st dates that don't result in 2nd dates don't lead to any platonic friendship. The woman usually doesn't want a platonic friendship after that 1-2 hour first date and the man usually isn't desiring any sort of friendship either.

Having no female friends isn't much of a sign of anything.



Don't call it "free sex". Almost all sex is paid, either directly or indirectly. Conventional dating is the better term for it as compared to free sex vs. paid sex.

Plenty of men dating a woman conventionally are paying for her expenses. Plenty of men will partially cover a woman's rent or help with car payments in exchange for sex in a conventional relationship. This isn't even a relationship based on "sugar dating" from Seeking either.

Men are buying luxury brand items for themselves in order to get laid from conventional sex. This is quite common with luxury car brands, luxury clothing/accessories (Rolex is a common purchase for this), and some other purchases. Men engage in consumerist behavior for the purposes of pounding vagina through conventional dating.

Your results with conventional dating are lackluster and that's frustrating to you. A quantity count of 9 partners is a good quantity count and actually higher than a lot of men's lifetime quantity count. Your big problem is taking your quantity into frequency/regularity. 9 partners and 17 times having sex lifetime from conventional dating isn't good.

Oh yeah, and I meant to address the other part of your post too.

You're right, dislike is probably a better word than saying a woman hates me after 1 date.

It's one thing if the man and woman already knew each other (and were possibly even friends) before the 1st date. In that case, they might become/remain platonic friends if the 1st date is a failure.

In cases where the woman didn't know you (or barely knew you) before the 1st date, however, if there weren't enough sparks to get a 2nd date, she's not going to want to be friends either.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I know you've explained before how a lot of so-called "free" sex is really paid for indirectly.

As shocking as this might sound (for a guy with all my baggage), however, a lot of the "free" sex I've had really was 100% free. Here's where it gets even more shocking: Broads would drive to come bang me when I was in college. No date required. All I had to do was post Craigslist ads...and then the fish would bite

You paid with the time and effort required to post on Craig's List... You wouldn't have gotten what you desired, had you not expended the effort

Which brings us back around to the central point: NOTHING in life comes to us "free of charge", even if that charge isn't monetary

 

[BaronOfHair]

With my history with the ladies, a rejection carries a lot of power.

It carries as much weight as you choose to attach to it, hombre, just as a remark like this https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...-is-it-worth-going.283111/page-2#post-3136703 can only affect me emotionally as much as I allow it to

The sh-t your going through is really nothing that EVERY man in the history of our species hasn't also gone through

 

[SW15]

I know you've explained before how a lot of so-called "free" sex is really paid for indirectly.

As shocking as this might sound (for a guy with all my baggage), however, a lot of the "free" sex I've had really was 100% free. Here's where it gets even more shocking: Broads would drive to come bang me when I was in college. No date required. All I had to do was post Craigslist ads...and then the fish would bite.

my strategy back then got me a decent amount of one night stands

It's possible to get occasional low cost sex for a minimal indirect price for most middle of the bell curve men.

The problem for a lot of men is that there's a lack of sustainability with trying to get low cost sex. You've been trying to operate like a top tier SMV man (aka 'Chad') and get low cost sex. A top tier man (85th-90th percentile +) offers enough to get women for lower costs and can get consistent short term sex. You're somewhere in the middle of the bell curve and you don't offer enough to get consistent short term sex for a low cost in conventional dating.

Posting a Craigslist ad and getting 1-2 instances of sex from it from any given woman (likely from a subpar to mediocre woman) isn't that great of an accomplishment and you can't get that style of sex with any regularity.

I ran into the problem you pointed out: Hard time getting consistent lays from the same woman.

9 free partners and 17 lays averages out to a little less than 2 lays per woman.

The best strategy for a middle of the bell curve SMV man is to find a way to get consistent lays from the same woman.

I know some married people who likely have never directly paid for sex and gotten all their sex from conventional dating. These are men who likely have had less than 9 sexual partners. From each of their partners, they likely averaged over 100 instances of sex per woman.

If a man makes an effort to get sustainable sex, he's happy with getting a 2 year relationship with her and having sex with her on 200+ separate days with her.

Serial monogamists are pretty good at getting sustainable sex but might have some small droughts between relationships.

It's one thing if the man and woman already knew each other (and were possibly even friends) before the 1st date. In that case, they might become/remain platonic friends if the 1st date is a failure.

In cases where the woman didn't know you (or barely knew you) before the 1st date, however, if there weren't enough sparks to get a 2nd date, she's not going to want to be friends either.

It's possible for a man and a woman to be friends after a failed first date if that dates was arranged from having common real life acquaintances. Perhaps they met at a backyard barbecue or other private residence party within that social circle. They might not be the closest friends, but they could stay friends. I see that as realistic.

If a man is arranging his first dates from approaching strangers in non-bar venues, approaching strangers in bars, using swipe apps, or sending random DMs on social media platforms, then his process is different. When this man has a failed first dates, the interaction typically ceases and both people move on with their lives as if that one unpleasant date day/date night never happened. There is no future interaction.

The interaction either ends with a ghosting/flaking or a woman sending a "I had a good time but do not see this going anywhere" type text message.

 

[GoodMan32]

You make a choice to think in such terms, rather than: "I've had free sex 17 times. What steps can I take to expand that number to 18 now"

I would have had an 18th and 19th free lay if I went through with the sex those 2 times we ended up naked in bed after a 1st date.

 

[GoodMan32]

Getting rejected for accomplishments is infinitely harder than being rejected by any woman. You wouldn't know, of course.

I've been rejected for jobs.

I got rejected by one of the colleges I applied to.

I still say getting rejected by a broad is worse.

At least I still had several colleges to pick from. As for jobs, I've had steady employment for years.

On the other hand, getting rejected by a broad could mean a loooooonnnnnnnnng drought.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

My experience, rejection rate is low because I let the women come to me. I only select the ones with the highest interest.

Keep in mind, rejection rate gets lower with patience. Being hasty increases the dude’s rejection rate because he’s swinging for anything.

women come to you how?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I've been rejected for jobs.

I got rejected by one of the colleges I applied to.

I still say getting rejected by a broad is worse.

At least I still had several colleges to pick from. As for jobs, I've had steady employment for years.

On the other hand, getting rejected by a broad could mean a loooooonnnnnnnnng drought.

Applying for a job or a college is not an accomplishment, that's why I said you wouldn't know what true rejection feels like.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I would have had an 18th and 19th free lay if I went through with the sex those 2 times we ended up naked in bed after a 1st date.

In the future then, it'd be astute to seal the deal in such instances, hombre. Doing so will bring your lay count up from 17, 18, 19, 20...

 

[GoodMan32]

In the future then, it'd be astute to seal the deal in such instances, hombre. Doing so will bring your lay count up from 17, 18, 19, 20...

My phobia of pregnancy was why I opted out of sex, despite the fact there was a naked woman in bed with me.

I want to up my free lay count, yet am also terrified of pregnancy. That's why I prefer older (which comes with its own challenges, as a lot of older broads will immediately disqualify me solely based on my age)

Unreal. I'm 33; not 20. I shouldn't face ageism for being "too young" anymore.