To attract women: be fun or be serious?

[Bingo-Player]

Too serious and you go down the Employer / Employee route things get too formal , she gets bored and you get ghosted

Too silly and you go down the dancing monkey route and the friendzone isn't far behind that

I've tried and tested a lot of stuff .....nonchalance and indifference are the golden bullets but sprinkled with a little humour and sexual innuendo

It's extremely important you ensure she can't slot you into a previous mans archetype as that's usually where the games begin

It's also worth noting maybe 60-70% of guys she meets will default to a stereotypical romcom style character with her which she's played out probably 1000X already

Anything that deviates from the norm / challenges her is exciting for her

 

[plumber]

The shy ones often hover and smile, the bolder ones will initiate conversations.

yes, do you go ahead and initiate conversation with the shy ones or because not looking just let them go?

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

I'm always confused about this.

1) One group of men say "Make her laugh, have fun, bring out the little girl in her and she'll be yours."

2) The other group of men say "Be serious, focused, no nonsense type of guy, and she will be yours."

All things considered (dress, height, look, money), which is it?

a mans behavior matters more than womens it seems

 

[BaronOfHair]

I'm always confused about this.

1) One group of men say "Make her laugh, have fun, bring out the little girl in her and she'll be yours."

2) The other group of men say "Be serious, focused, no nonsense type of guy, and she will be yours."

All things considered (dress, height, look, money), which is it?

Some ways of having fun and making her laugh are more alluring than others. Think

rather than

 

[BaronOfHair]

a mans behavior matters more than womens it seems

Megan Fox possessed an obnoxious streak that far exceeded her talent, Whitney Houston couldn't resist the urge to act like a loon interviews, Britney Spears let her baby get behind the wheel... Each witnessed their careers and public esteem go down the sh-tter, just as quickly as their fame was acquired

Behavior dictates the trajectory of ALL our lives, ultimately, no matter what gender we are. Or think we are, in this day and age

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

Megan Fox possessed an obnoxious streak that far exceeded her talent, Whitney Houston couldn't resist the urge to act like a loon interviews, Britney Spears let her baby get behind the wheel... Each witnessed their careers and public esteem go down the sh-tter, just as quickly as their fame was acquired

Behavior dictates the trajectory of ALL our lives, ultimately, no matter what gender we are. Or think we are, in this day and age

well over the years, i know i'm in good company, and that is, a mans social-skills, conversation-ability, impact his ability to attract women, to get laid, to get a girlfriend, a lot more than the other way around it seems, its even said that, men are always the ones that have to bring value to interactions, be the one to makes it fun or interesting, the quality of the interaction rests on the mans shoulders.

 

[BaronOfHair]

well over the years, i know i'm in good company, and that is, a mans social-skills, conversation-ability, impact his ability to attract women, to get laid, to get a girlfriend, a lot more than the other way around it seems, its even said that, men are always the ones that have to bring value to interactions, be the one to makes it fun or interesting, the quality of the interaction rests on the mans shoulders.

You have to "be the man" and lead, or go without, this is true

 

[BaronOfHair]

You don't need to entertain them, you're not a performing monkey.

That's what I was getting at here:

Some ways of having fun and making her laugh are more alluring than others. Think

rather than

The Kreischer type is desperately trying to entertain everyone, as opposed to being light and playful. Which sends almost everyone around him charging for the exit, faster than Falling Man https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Falling_Man#:~:text=Most of the people who,F (1,090 °C)) headed for the nearest window, once The Trade Towers grew a trifle TOO toasty for his liking

 

[parabellum]

To the original question.

In my experience, better to be serious than fun. Better yet, you’re serious with pretty much everyone, but you show her your fun side, sometimes.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

You have to "be the man" and lead, or go without, this is true

so am i right in what i said about the quality of the interaction rests on mens shoulders?

 

[BaronOfHair]

so am i right in what i said about the quality of the interaction rests on mens shoulders?

Dating and mating is like everything else in life, hoss... The benefits we receive are dependent upon the effort we put into our pursuits

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

Dating and mating is like everything else in life, hoss... The benefits we receive are dependent upon the effort we put into our pursuits

yeah, its just that the way it has always looked like, is that, men are the only gender that were meant to experience or receive rewards for putting in work or effort, but not women.

 

[BaronOfHair]

yeah, its just that the way it has always looked like, is that, men are the only gender that were meant to experience or receive rewards for putting in work or effort, but not women.

If that were the case, women wouldn't be looking over Sydney Sweeney's shoulder

, for tips on how THEY can strengthen their sex appeal

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

If that were the case, women wouldn't be looking over Sydney Sweeney's shoulder

, for tips on how THEY can strengthen their sex appeal

yup, because a mans communication skills matter more than womens. Yeah, oh well, it is what it is

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Just play into your strengths and natural personality.

Trying to neuter your personality for mass appeal is dumb.

Better to be polarizing and be hyper attractive to some women and unattractive to others. The absolute worst is for you to be a forgettable NPC where every women has a neutral opinion ie thinks you're a "great guy" and is boring and forgettable. If some women don't hate you, you're doing something wrong.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

View attachment 13299

That's wild. Do you mind if I share that?

 

[Clockwerk50]

Just play into your strengths and natural personality.

Trying to neuter your personality for mass appeal is dumb.

Better to be polarizing and be hyper attractive to some women and unattractive to others. The absolute worst is for you to be a forgettable NPC where every women has a neutral opinion ie thinks you're a "great guy" and is boring and forgettable. If some women don't hate you, you're doing something wrong.

That is basically the Natural archetype. They are spontaneous, sincere, and unpretentious, making people feel comfortable. They use their vulnerabilities to their advantage, inspiring sympathy and protection. While some of this is genuine, they often use exaggerated charm to disarm others. All of these qualities are derived from childhood.

Sadly, it works best in one who is still young enough for them to seem natural. They are much harder for an older person to pull off.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

they often use exaggerated charm to disarm others. All of these qualities are derived from childhood.

Sadly, it works best in one who is still young enough for them to seem natural. They are much harder for an older person to pull off.

who's they? Idk I'm mid 30s and that same attitude lets me talk my way into jobs i'm not even remotely qualified for. it's not that "be yourself" horseshvt it's genuinely not filtering anything you say

 

[Clockwerk50]

who's they? Idk I'm mid 30s and that same attitude lets me talk my way into jobs i'm not even remotely qualified for. it's not that "be yourself" horseshvt it's genuinely not filtering anything you say

Naturals. You probably have that child-like fearlessness that adults often lose. You’re like a breath of fresh air in a cautious world, charging forward with a playful spirit that feels completely natural. If you happen to offend someone, you’re just too lovable for them to stay mad at you.

Being in your 30s isn’t old. I meant that as people grow older, their natural qualities should reflect that same open spirit, transforming youthful innocence into a genuine confidence that connects with others.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Naturals. You probably have that child-like fearlessness that adults often lose. You’re like a breath of fresh air in a cautious world, charging forward with a playful spirit that feels completely natural. If you happen to offend someone, you’re just too lovable for them to stay mad at you.

Being in your 30s isn’t old. I meant that as people grow older, their natural qualities should reflect that same open spirit, transforming youthful innocence into a genuine confidence that connects with others.

Oh I gotcha. I thought you were implying it's somehow more mature to neuter your personality.