The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[soulforge]

Are your exes quite hot?

Part of the difficulty of letting go of my ex is, because she is damn hot.. Age 24, blonde, blue eyes, slim/toned, & Eastern European. Most mens dream girl.

Hot.. but toxic/damaged.

 

[soulforge]

View attachment 11407 While my ex doesn't read my poetry, she knows there's no coming back from the way she tried to blame the divorce and everything around it on me to assuage her own feelings of guilt for abandoning her sick husband.
Everybody knew what had happened and my discretion was appreciated by her family and my/our friends. I got rid of my anger by writing poetry and a self-help manual using martial arts to overcome a divorce.

However, unlike most of you here, I couldn't 'ghost' my ex-wife or go incommunicado, because we have children together. Children who were 6 and 9 when she initiated the divorce. Children that we have to co-parent.

After nine months of hostilities my ex-wife asked me if we could talk, she had trouble sleeping and she had things on her mind.
I told her we could talk about the children, but that as far as the rest was concerned I had moved on and I was very happy and I hoped she would find happiness herself.

I heard later that she had taken my response quite hard, but her betrayal of her marital vows shouldn't be without dire consequences.

That's a good way for you to vent or let out your feelings.

Am I right to believe, it took you nine months to move on?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Am I right to believe, it took you nine months to move on?

No, that's wrong. Actually, one of my friends asked me before the divorce was final, what I would've done if my wife had a change of heart and decided she wouldn't want to divorce me. I told him that it was too late for that already - I knew she couldn't be trusted and I cannot build/sustain a relationship without trust.

I started prepping for my post-divorce life the moment she initiated the divorce. I already had a good network of friends, but I also dusted off my FL profile and posted an announcement that I was looking for rope bunnies.
Part of my ex-wife's hostility was probably due to the fact that I was going to parties every weekend since my divorce. I didn't tell her, but I think some of her friends noticed my activity on FL and probably told her. Her bitterness and fury was palpable every Sunday when I came to get the kids (they stayed with me during the school week and with her on the weekends) and she remained hostile for about nine months after the divorce.

I think she had expected me to be plunged in despair by her leaving me. It's true, the best revenge is living well.

 

[soulforge]

Ha! That’s what I’m dealing, from Norwegian decent 6ft tall.
I just take it as a pat on the back old chap that I had the charm to open sesame. I learned a ton about seduction just being around her and how she deals with orbiters

Time heals all wounds, but being mentally stoic drastically reduces recovery time

True, and remember an attractive girl does not mean she is a quality person. Many can be extremely toxic.. Us men need to look beyond the attractiveness, and take a deeper look into her character.

My ex was hot... However fell very short of a partner whom you can build a life with or even manage a couple of months without drama, chaos.

Being hot just isn't enough.

 

[Foe]

Finding a good quality woman is the long game. It might happen, however likely to take some time.

In the mean time, best we focus on ourselves, leveling up and enjoy the casual fun along the way.

Took a call yesterday, first time in three months. She threw her ***** at me and for the first time I declined in three years. Then she blocked me. Don't be soft like me.

 

[soulforge]

Took a call yesterday, first time in three months. She threw her ***** at me and for the first time I declined in three years. Then she blocked me. Don't be soft like me.

When I do NC I mean it.. Absolutely no conversation, social media, texting, NOTHING!

Once it's over, it's over.. Your 100% focus should be on moving on ASAP

 

[Dr.Suave]

The big question is what would all of you do if your ex contacted you while you are doing no contact?

If you still single ir spinning plates, you can bang her if you want but wear a condom AND never give her exclusivity again, she's recreational use Only.

If you in a Ltr with a younger, hotter, better girl. You AND Your new girl can make fun of her for a while AND block her when ITS no longer fun.

 

[soulforge]

If you still single ir spinning plates, you can bang her if you want but wear a condom AND never give her exclusivity again, she's recreational use Only.

If you in a Ltr with a younger, hotter, better girl. You AND Your new girl can make fun of her for a while AND block her when ITS no longer fun.

I hear about lots of guys banging the ex, and over sometime developing feelings for her again. It's a risky venture.

 

[Glassguy]

I had my first test tonight. I didnt respond to either. Right before I was gonna go trick or treating with my kids. Its the first time she has contacted me after 1 week of no contact. She called then texted me. She said in the text that she called me because she wanted to talk with my children and wish them a happy halloween. She helped raised my children for the past 7 years eventhough they werent kids that I had with her. Did I make the right move by not responding and not letting her talk to them?

Yes.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

When our relationship ended she told me she wants to remain friends and that she always will be there for my kids if they ever need anything. Was she just using my kids as a ploy to contact me tonight?

Yes, of course.

 

[soulforge]

How’s everyone doing?

Haven’t had the urge to reply to multiple texts and calls. It’s been decreasing, think she gets the message I’m trying to send. Emotional detachment is awesome, no longer a victim under her spell

Keep it going man.. I feel like a junkie withdrawing off some terrible toxic drug myself.

Did you end it? Or did she end it?

They almost sense that detachment taking place. This is why they usually reach out, when they sense we have moved on.

 

[soulforge]

I had my first test tonight. I didnt respond to either. Right before I was gonna go trick or treating with my kids. Its the first time she has contacted me after 1 week of no contact. She called then texted me. She said in the text that she called me because she wanted to talk with my children and wish them a happy halloween. She helped raised my children for the past 7 years eventhough they werent kids that I had with her. Did I make the right move by not responding and not letting her talk to them?

My friend they will use every tactic under the sun to talk/contact you.

Remember they are not doing this for your benefit.. They gradually want to detatch from you, essentially they will use you, to get to ever the break quickly and with as little pain as possible.

 

[Dr.Suave]

When our relationship ended she told me she wants to remain friends and that she always will be there for my kids if they ever need anything. Was she just using my kids as a ploy to contact me tonight?

Translation: "You have made me lost all attraction for you and I no longer see you as worthy of my p00zy, I regret putting out. But I want to enjoy your attention/validation and keep you around in my orbit in case I need help with changing a tire or something"

We all been there, bro.

 

[Baibars]

Let’s be honest guys.
The root of all the problems we have here is that there is always this one girl (an ex for example) we overvalue for one or another reason. It doesn’t matter if you fcked up with a girl you met a few times. If you’re a normal guy, you’ve had your experiences and been around this forum for some time, you won’t go crazy for a random girl. It happens when you’ve built an attachment and that ONE girl no longer wants you.
We have to detach from this one girl. Just yesterday night the 18 year old son of a family friend hanged himself over a girl he loved while that girl gets her cheeks clapped by another guy. He couldn’t deal with that fact.
We have to accept it and move on. Do not expect her to come back, do not care what she’s doing, do not care who she’s with, do not act a certain way so she comes back. Just live like you did before you knew her. That’s key. Getting there is important.
It’s been 2 months since I’m not with my ex and I acted weak everything you can imagine. Dated 3-4 girls after her and I did not give a fck about them. I literally kicked one girl out of my place cause she was annoying. I know I have to get back to my normal state and detach. You have to do that.

 

[soulforge]

Let’s be honest guys.
The root of all the problems we have here is that there is always this one girl (an ex for example) we overvalue for one or another reason. It doesn’t matter if you fcked up with a girl you met a few times. If you’re a normal guy, you’ve had your experiences and been around this forum for some time, you won’t go crazy for a random girl. It happens when you’ve built an attachment and that ONE girl no longer wants you.
We have to detach from this one girl. Just yesterday night the 18 year old son of a family friend hanged himself over a girl he loved while that girl gets her cheeks clapped by another guy. He couldn’t deal with that fact.
We have to accept it and move on. Do not expect her to come back, do not care what she’s doing, do not care who she’s with, do not act a certain way so she comes back. Just live like you did before you knew her. That’s key. Getting there is important.
It’s been 2 months since I’m not with my ex and I acted weak everything you can imagine. Dated 3-4 girls after her and I did not give a fck about them. I literally kicked one girl out of my place cause she was annoying. I know I have to get back to my normal state and detach. You have to do that.

My brother told me about a dude who deleted himself over a girl he was with in a long term relationship. They lived together and she monkey branched to another dude she was banging on the side.

As men in general have become weaker as a whole & females looking for the bigger better deal at its Max, self deletion is pretty common amongst men.

Personaly I am very careful about getting too attached to a chick, if I can sense something is wrong, or warning signs I am picking up on.. I will dip out early on, within the first few months of the relationship, rather than hang around & get monkey branched on 2 years down the line.

Ofen we know the chick is unpredictable, but the sweet pvssy keeps us holding on.

 

[Baibars]

I wanna text my ex that she dumped me and basically abandoned my kids at this point. I wanna tell her to leave us alone and stay out of our lives. Should I do that versus staying full ghost with her? I dont understnd why she is texting and calling to speak with them when me and her are done.

You want to do that to get a reaction out of her. I’d say don’t do that. Do nothing to manipulate her back into liking you.

 

[soulforge]

I wanna text my ex that she dumped me and basically abandoned my kids at this point. I wanna tell her to leave us alone and stay out of our lives. Should I do that versus staying full ghost with her? I dont understnd why she is texting and calling to speak with them when me and her are done.

Texting her will achieve nothing. She knows full well what she did, you don't have to remind her. She already thought it through probably months ago.

I know it seems/feels counter productive, however going silent is your only option at this time.

Literally nothing else has any use.

She made a decision to end it, she broke that connection for good.

Literally do not talk to her again.

 

[Baibars]

My brother told me about a dude who deleted himself over a girl he was with in a long term relationship. They lived together and she monkey branched to another dude she was banging on the side.

As men in general have become weaker as a whole & females looking for the bigger better deal at its Max, self deletion is pretty common amongst men.

Personaly I am very careful about getting too attached to a chick, if I can sense something is wrong, or warning signs I am picking up on.. I will dip out early on, within the first few months of the relationship, rather than hang around & get monkey branched on 2 years down the line.

Ofen we know the chick is unpredictable, but the sweet pvssy keeps us holding on.

that’s wise. Getting attached is easy, getting detached is hard af depending on the length etc.

I was telling myself I’m red pill I can control myself but you can’t fight human nature. If you invest and build memories with a girl you’re playing with fire especially if she’s not a good one.

 

[Baibars]

If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already? Isnt ghosting a woman a bad idea in the sense that it gives them time to forget about us and date new men? How is that a good thing for us if we want to possibly get back with them down the road?

do not focus on ignoring her or getting her back. I think it’s more important for us to focus on detaching. It’s a totally different thing to want a girl when you’re not attached af compared to wanting her when you’re in peace with yourself. Right now you’re in a emotional state.
I’m in a similar situation. I think the best advice is try to heal and get out of that emotional state so you think clear and if you want to give her a chance, let the door open for her but don’t chase while you’re attached and „sick“.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already?

Let's hope so.
You split from her. Move on. Find another woman.