CerwinVegaFan said:
SoSuave666, I wish I've had more people like you in my life.
None of my friends had really gone through what I have, some of them are in my position minus the breakup (highschool sweethearts) and whenever I tell them to go out and stop treating their girls like princesses my words fall on deaf ears.
They keep telling me my ex was bad and I will find someone better.
Maybe she is bad, but blaming her entirely and excusing myself saying she's BPD is running away from my issues.
At the risk of sounding perhaps a bit callous, the best thing you could hope for your friends is that these high school sweethearts eventually tear them several new ones by means of a ruthless breakup. That's not to say that you'd
only wish this for them - hey, if it works out for them, that's great too, but think about what you've been through/are going through and the impact it's had (and will continue to have) on your life.
I'm 4 days shy of making one month since my girlfriend left me, and just this morning I was looking forward with a twisted sense of enthusiasm to my next breakup, precisely because it has brought so many personal deficiencies to light and led me to re-examine my life as a whole in a way that would not have happened if not for the breakup. For example, I've been thinking a lot lately about not just what attracted my ex, but other girls in the past, and it's all basically come down to the same thing, they all were drawn to the way I carried myself, broadly speaking. That wasn't me
at all this last time around. I was a needy, insecure little *****, and I brought everything that came as a result of that upon myself - the misery, the anxiety, the feeling of proceeding through the relationship with my brain turned off, and finally, the break up.
Girls have the capacity of reevaluating their situations post breakup too, sure, but for the sake of argument, if a girl is at or at least very near the 5 mark as far as her beauty is concerned, all she really has to do is get dolled up, hit the bars/clubs and she'll have a guy in no time to help pave over the pain and feeling of emptiness. Some don't even have to go that far. Some just need to let it be known on Facebook that they're now single and dudes will flock to her without hesitation - just the way it is.
It's much much better that this isn't the case for us guys in the long term - we get to take a more proactive approach as far as improving ourselves by seeing to it that we continue to increase in value. This is an opportunity not just to find yourself again, but to build upon yourself like never before. Sky's the limit man.
And @ SoSuave666 - excellent post.
