The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[StuffofLegends]

Day 20 NC

Still keeping it going! I see the looking at FB issue on a lot of posts.. From my experience, when you quit finding out what she's up too, you can stop trying to analyze her actions and think about her less. I still may think about it but don't feed those thoughts... Get busy with something else.

 

[Noyou]

When my ex mentioned the "be friends" part and "stay in contact" I dropped right off the ****ing planet to her. Now I get random friend requests on facebook from random women. ****ing really? Lol dumb slut

Day 211

Got random friend request from old facebook profile. Looked at exs FB, she added some guy and proceeded to look at his page. She's in one of his pics, looking the exact same when she left me. Also the guy looks pathetic, sideways hat looking fool.

All happened after I went on this date with this 9/10 woman.
Had a feeling this might happen, was a fool for falling for that indirect "pull" of power.

Moral: exs always feel when you're moving on and will stop you

Update: LEL, profile was fake, was quickly deactivated next day after friend request. LOLOLOLOLOL

Time to make more money, save my company and have a big ass smile on my face

 

[Machtwo]

Thanks to this site & especially this thread I've just put my new found skills in to action! I've been seeing a chick, a much younger chick, but recently her dynamic changed, so I've kept my cool & my distance from her.
Two weeks ago I deleted every form of contact I had for her & went ghost.
I think she's just found out, as I've just had this text from her:

Have you actually deleted me off Facebook, Snapchat etc?? What is your problem? People are going to start asking questions AGAIN

How do my fellow DJ's think I should react to this please...

 

[MattTheW]

Thanks to this site & especially this thread I've just put my new found skills in to action! I've been seeing a chick, a much younger chick, but recently her dynamic changed, so I've kept my cool & my distance from her.
Two weeks ago I deleted every form of contact I had for her & went ghost.
I think she's just found out, as I've just had this text from her:

Have you actually deleted me off Facebook, Snapchat etc?? What is your problem? People are going to start asking questions AGAIN

How do my fellow DJ's think I should react to this please...

Took her 2 weeks to notice

Sh1t test, don't even give her the time of day

If you really wanna fcuk with her. Ask her who it is that's texting you

But seriously, I wouldn't even be bothered to reply to her......

 

[Cerwin Vega]

I'd really like to confront these girls, just once, ask them WHAT THE **** ARE YOU THINKING YOU STUPID *****? You stopped talking to me and now you suddenly remembered of my existence?!

Man, it's ****ing annoying that it's perfectly fine for a woman to lose interest and as a man you must "respect her decision" yet she expects you to stay on the radar.

 

[Sardines]

^^
Don't waste your time trying to understand women. They aren't logical creatures rather emotional ones. That's why a woman can sleep with you one minute and not care about you the next, it's all about how they are feeling at that moment.

 

[Lion1985]

All happened after I went on this date with this 9/10 woman.
Had a feeling this might happen, was a fool for falling for that indirect "pull" of power.

Moral: exs always feel when you're moving on and will stop you

THIS IS SO FVCKING TRUE -> FIELDTESTED!

I dont know, but there really have MAGIC RADARS or something like that.

My last ex tried to resume the contact to me SAME! day I meet a new girl.

 

[Cerwin Vega]

Brothers, I must confess.

As I written before, I'm moving abroad after I get released from the military, in order to start my studying.
I was going through my stuff, when I found my old army patch. I got it when I got accepted to the military academy, before I met her, and I used to wear it for the past 4 years until I got a new one.

No idea why, but I was thinking of putting it in an envelope with her name on it, in her mailbox, the night before my flight, without any note or anything.

Maybe to make her think of me
Maybe to give her a small "goodbye" gift
Maybe to show her I'm not mad

Leaving without doing anything just seems wrong.
I have made it clear that we should not talk at all and it seems like she respects that, she hasn't contacted me since, except for one phone call the day after asking "how are you feeling".
I have also made it clear that we will never be together since she slept with the other guy.

The envelope thing doesn't mean anything in terms of wanting her back or anything. I'm a lot more rational now than I was before, I know this breakup is the best thing that could've happen to me and going back will be the biggest mistake of my life.

I also wanna do it at the last day so even if by the crazy idea that she'll drive to my home and threaten to kill herself unless I take her back (which will never happen, she maybe even throw it to the garbage, but go figure), I'll be gone from this country.

I'm not really angry at her (right now, feelings change as we all know), I just want her to have good memories.

Everybody says you have to remember all the bad things she's done to you, and she did a LOT of horrible things, but I can't even seem to recall them for some reason. 90% of my memories of her are positive, even though in retrospect she was (and is) a horrible human being.

Advice, brothers

 

[Lion1985]

Very good sh!t, a MUST READ for everyone:

http://breakuprecoveryguide.com/Topics

 

[Noyou]

I'd say I'm a friend in need on here and any idea of contacting her is a bad idea. BAD IDEA

Leaving without doing anything seems wrong
BUT
Does she really matter in your life, I mean she wanted out like a dumb ho. Why do you have to tell her anything?
Trust me, it won't make you feel better.

She has to come to you

 

[Cerwin Vega]

I don't want to tell her anything, just give her a little something that says "I'm not angry, thank you for the great times we've had, here's something to remember them", hence my army patch.

 

[MattTheW]

I'd say I'm a friend in need on here and any idea of contacting her is a bad idea. BAD IDEA

Leaving without doing anything seems wrong
BUT
Does she really matter in your life, I mean she wanted out like a dumb ho. Why do you have to tell her anything?
Trust me, it won't make you feel better.

She has to come to you

I don't want to tell her anything, just give her a little something that says "I'm not angry, thank you for the great times we've had, here's something to remember them", hence my army patch.

This shows that she still means something to you
All you are telling her is that "You still have a hold on me"
She probably wont even care fella - I'm sorry if this sounds harsh......I wouldn't be surprised if it got thrown to one side as soon as she got it

This is just tripping you up on your progression, stay NC, move away and never look back

The only momentos I keep from relationships are the things I like that hold no sentimental value with regards to the people who gave them to me, I got 2 watches from 2 different girls - I think that is all (as I don't associate them with the relationships it's hard to recall what I've kept lol).......

The patch isn't jewellery, it isn't expensive, the only thing it has is that it is from you - she's moved/ing on - it is pointless sending it to her.........

 

[Noyou]

This shows that she still means something to you
All you are telling her is that "You still have a hold on me"
She probably wont even care fella - I'm sorry if this sounds harsh......I wouldn't be surprised if it got thrown to one side as soon as she got it

This is just tripping you up on your progression, stay NC, move away and never look back

The only momentos I keep from relationships are the things I like that hold no sentimental value with regards to the people who gave them to me, I got 2 watches from 2 different girls - I think that is all (as I don't associate them with the relationships it's hard to recall what I've kept lol).......

The patch isn't jewellery, it isn't expensive, the only thing it has is that it is from you - she's moved/ing on - it is pointless sending it to her.........

Agreed, I did this and it made things worse.
You know what she'll say?
"See? I still got him"
Then when you think you did something to get it off your chest, she'll put more on you.

It's hard to do and I sometimes have a hard time doing this, just don't give a damn. Why give thought process on how one woman reacts to your actions. Hell your going to travel to study ya? Find a woman there who will care about your actions.

 

[mkj1990]

Saw my ex out in public for the first time in six months last night.
We both just smiled and said hello to each other. It looked like she wanted to stop and chat, but I just kept on walking.

A couple of months ago she started a fight with me over some rumours she had heard, and a few weeks ago I sent her a text on her birthday, but I did not get any response. So I figured that if she does not want to take the time to thank me for wishing her a happy birthday I'm not going to bother chatting with her when I meet her on the street. Do you guys agree...?

 

[Sardines]

Need some serious advice here. Please chime in if you can @MattTheW

So my ex texted me 21 days into my NC that she had something she wanted to get off her chest that was bothering her, and that it had been bothering her for a while, she thought it would go away when we stopped talking but it hadn't.

I initially deleted the messages but i was curious to know what it was so i waited a week to respond. This is what i sent to her: "Hey i got your texts but i've been super busy with work, i've got a few minutes before i head into a meeting, what is it you want to get off your chest? Glad you're well too."

I haven't heard from her since. I mean seriously WTF?

 

[MattTheW]

Saw my ex out in public for the first time in six months last night.
We both just smiled and said hello to each other. It looked like she wanted to stop and chat, but I just kept on walking.

A couple of months ago she started a fight with me over some rumours she had heard, and a few weeks ago I sent her a text on her birthday, but I did not get any response. So I figured that if she does not want to take the time to thank me for wishing her a happy birthday I'm not going to bother chatting with her when I meet her on the street. Do you guys agree...?

Don't waste your time questioning your actions
move on

 

[MattTheW]

Need some serious advice here. Please chime in if you can @MattTheW

So my ex texted me 21 days into my NC that she had something she wanted to get off her chest that was bothering her, and that it had been bothering her for a while, she thought it would go away when we stopped talking but it hadn't.

I initially deleted the messages but i was curious to know what it was so i waited a week to respond. This is what i sent to her: "Hey i got your texts but i've been super busy with work, i've got a few minutes before i head into a meeting, what is it you want to get off your chest? Glad you're well too."

Man she pulled you in hook line and sinker
Not only did you reply - you asked her how she was!!!

You've successfully stroked her ego and now she's happy that she still has some level of control over you so she goes quiet

I haven't heard from her since. I mean seriously WTF?

Did you honestly think she'd rush to reply?

Even if she does reply - it will be bullsh1t!!!
DO NOT REPLY TO HER AGAIN!!!

You will only go backwards from where you have got to in 3 weeks!!

Do you feel any better now that you've replied to her? Have you gained anything from this? She has gained everything by you replying, you've undermined your progress and now you are still questioning what is going on her head

FORGET HER!!!
Concentrate on you - you don't need or want to know what she is dangling in front of you. If it was that important she could of told you by now, even without waiting for you to reply back to her!!!!

YOU DONT NEED HER IN YOUR LIFE - YOU DONT NEED TO KNOW WHAT IT IS THAT SHE THINKS IS SO IMPORTANT (it wont be important!!) YOU WILL GAIN NOTHING FROM CONTACTING HER

 

[Sardines]

@MattTheW

I had an inclination something like this could happen hence why i waited a week to respond. I also agree with you that she could have told me what she wanted to say without me me replying. But I am naturally curious and inquisitive person so i guess that got the better of me.

But why can't she move on with her new guy and just leave me alone? I understand the ego thing up to a point but why try to mess with me and not enjoy herself with her new guy (previous ex)?

 

[MattTheW]

@MattTheW

I had an inclination something like this could happen hence why i waited a week to respond. I also agree with you that she could have told me what she wanted to say without me me replying. But I am naturally curious and inquisitive person so i guess that got the better of me.

A week - you should never of replied, you should have waited until the point that you didn't even care anymore!!!

And she probably knows how your brain works and is pulling your strings mate, she knows exactly how to play you

If you think you know how something is going to turn out then that is probably what it going to happen
Trust your instincts!!

But why can't she move on with her new guy and just leave me alone? I understand the ego thing up to a point but why try to mess with me and not enjoy herself with her new guy (previous ex)?

Don't even concern yourself with it
She doesn't want you back - she just wants to keep you orbiting

MOVE ON - FORGET HER AND WHAT SHE'S DOING
CONCENTRATE ON YOURSELF, GET OUT INTO THE WORLD AND ENJOY!!!

 

[StuffofLegends]

Saw my ex out in public for the first time in six months last night.
We both just smiled and said hello to each other. It looked like she wanted to stop and chat, but I just kept on walking.

A couple of months ago she started a fight with me over some rumours she had heard, and a few weeks ago I sent her a text on her birthday, but I did not get any response. So I figured that if she does not want to take the time to thank me for wishing her a happy birthday I'm not going to bother chatting with her when I meet her on the street. Do you guys agree...?

Sounds like you handled the situation great!