The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[European-DJ]

Day4

Day 5

Yesterday almost broke me and here is why:
Doing my time as a single guy, I have been on 4 dates, gotten 2 lays, and have 2 more dates with 2 new women within the next 5 days. The fact that I am dating others is not an issue, the issue is the girls and their questions:

- oh your ex is so beautiful
- why didn't it work out
- oh my, it looks like you guys had a great relationship, what happened
- etc etc.

The fact is, that every time someone ask's me theese questions I fell the urge of crawling back to her: honestly, we did have an amazing relationship, lots of sex and lots of love - I just changed and wanted something new; because of her double standards; her constantly talking behind my back to her friends and family; and especially because of her past and me starting getting jealous over idiotic things....

Long story short: man did I miss her yesterday, but I kept in there, and I am still trying to forget.
But I do fell my motivation is falling, I am missing her like notning Else...

 

[European-DJ]

I am getting desperate here, my pain is enormous this morning, and my thoughts are all about her - I know when and where she works, and am in such desperation that i want to go meet her, tomorrow morning before she goes to work.... I am such a mess, but right now, I would do anything to give her a warm hug, hold around her, and just see her perfect
Smile once again... Really, I am ring teared apart over here..

I even wrote an huge text I want to text her, but I am not going to do it... It just lays in 'drafts'...

Damn this is harder than I thought.

 

[SMS 48]

Are you sure it was idiotic and that her past was not actually a big deal?

^ This. Girls have an amazing ability to make legitimate male concerns look stupid to the same male who has these concerns.

 

[staystrong]

Day 35: I dont want to spend plates to solve problems. I shouldn't need a girlfreind to be happy, I just need to be happy single, and the rest will come in time.

P.s. not to say plates aren't fun, ha, just not the solution.

 

[staystrong]

European Dude: you dont need the 10 girl theory, you dont need to be with her, or contact her, you dont need to figure out why her past is so present.

The only thing you need to do is be happy alone for a while.

P.s. If you really want to call her and feel like your literally about to, before you do, just go back and read what happened to me when I broke contact on day 11. I wrote on this right after I broke contact and might show you how bad an idea it is.

 

[SMS 48]

European Dude: you dont need the 10 girl theory, you dont need to be with her, or contact her, you dont need to figure out why her past is so present.

The only thing you need to do is be happy alone for a while.

P.s. If you really want to call her and feel like your literally about to, before you do, just go back and read what happened to me when I broke contact on day 11. I wrote on this right after I broke contact and might show you how bad an idea it is.

How long did you date her?

She's an evil bytch by the way.

 

[TonyBaloney]

Day 35: I dont want to spend plates to solve problems. I shouldn't need a girlfreind to be happy, I just need to be happy single, and the rest will come in time.

P.s. not to say plates aren't fun, ha, just not the solution.

Hey buddy, its Tony here.

I commented last time before you broke NC.

I am now on 6 months - twas a long, lonely winter. Its been difficult - it always is where emotions are involved. I went straight out and got another couple of chicks and kinda had relationships for a couple of months spinning them both- but it did me no favours - i felt like i had to replace the more significant relationship. But you never can just like that at a drop of a hat.

What i'm on now, is where you have found. You have GOTTA truly be at that place your at. I think if you go through enormous pain, its the only way. Eventually it does feel like things will happen as they are meant too.

Harder now cos i'm 39, but still - young at heart.

Good luck STAYSTRONG - your heading in thr right direction - forward.......

Tony

 

[SMS 48]

Hey buddy, its Tony here.

I commented last time before you broke NC.

I am now on 6 months - twas a long, lonely winter. Its been difficult - it always is where emotions are involved. I went straight out and got another couple of chicks and kinda had relationships for a couple of months spinning them both- but it did me no favours - i felt like i had to replace the more significant relationship. But you never can just like that at a drop of a hat.

What i'm on now, is where you have found. You have GOTTA truly be at that place your at. I think if you go through enormous pain, its the only way. Eventually it does feel like things will happen as they are meant too.

Harder now cos i'm 39, but still - young at heart.

Good luck STAYSTRONG - your heading in thr right direction - forward.......

Tony

Has she contacted you within the 6 months?

 

[TonyBaloney]

Hi SMS,

No she hasnt.

I made it pretty impossible for her too. This was the 10th breakup or so over a 3 1/2 year stretch. She took me to hell and back. And I pretty much told her never ever ever contact me again. Since then though, i asked her mum for my stuff, but was being ****ed around, so told the mum to give it to charity.

It was hurtful because i went back to her against my better judgement (sweet sex) while I had met a new girl. New girl was nice, but we didnt have the chemistry. Cheated on her with the original one. Original one said dump the new, and we can start again - i did - and two days later she dumped me.............CXXT COOONT *****!!!!!!! AAAAAAGH STILL ANGRY!!!!!

What a *****!!!

 

[SMS 48]

Hi SMS,

No she hasnt.

I made it pretty impossible for her too. This was the 10th breakup or so over a 3 1/2 year stretch. She took me to hell and back. And I pretty much told her never ever ever contact me again. Since then though, i asked her mum for my stuff, but was being ****ed around, so told the mum to give it to charity.

It was hurtful because i went back to her against my better judgement (sweet sex) while I had met a new girl. New girl was nice, but we didnt have the chemistry. Cheated on her with the original one. Original one said dump the new, and we can start again - i did - and two days later she dumped me.............CXXT COOONT *****!!!!!!! AAAAAAGH STILL ANGRY!!!!!

What a *****!!!

Feelsbadman.

If it makes you feel better, women are utterly despicable human beings. What happened to you wasn't really a personal attack. She was just fulfilling her estrogen-fueled nature to perpetuate evil.

 

[staystrong]

Everybody who has been keeping up with me, or has ALREADY BEEN THROUGH EX GAMES, i have one question that I keep thinking about. Not about my ex, just about myself.

Not so much on rebound over ex, but the lonely feeling I had before I even met her. I keep fighting myself on whether I should hook up with random chicks, get a sleeping/emotional comfort buddy, or try being happy alone.
I feel to intelligent to do something stupid like the first 2, but my heart and dikc think option 1 and 2 sound fantastic! haha!

First option: just as bad as my ex, Im a good person, not an axs.
second option: know a girl who just got out of LTR. I just want to sleep(no sex cuz im waiting for someone special for my first time[ im man enough to say it means something to me]) to numb the pain. I wouldn't be looking for anything obviously, and knowing that ahead of time helps.
3 option: the most healthy, intelligent, and long term goal for me. Funny thing is, although i know this is probably right, but i prefer not to be alone.

I feel like if I do 1 or 2 I am stooping to my no morals ex. I still think 1 and 2 is immature, stupid, makes me a **** or pessy, and I'm too smart for that.

BUT, sometimes I want to, 1 for experience/ fun/ self esteem, 2 for comfort/ no drama, make cuddling have no value.

So, i have 3 doors to pick before I head off to South America in 25 days. Please explain why you pck what door as well. I want logic in the resonses. THANKS!!

 

[European-DJ]

Day 6

I Called her this morning, and once again she didn't answer.
I left a message.

The reason I called her is that she have some clothes at my place, and that I forgot a 400$ blazer at her place (have looked everywhere cannot find it).

If she does not answe me within 30 hours, I am Throughing the stuff in the garbage can, because it reminds me of her.

I don't think I broke nc, since I called her for a very good reason, neither was I crying nor were I begging her to call back or anything.
I just left a message on her phone, and that is it !

I must admit though, it did annoy me that she didn't pick up the phone...


Anyway, yesterday went fine, only during the mornings and during my dreams I thinking about her.
I went to a club yesterday and got a ONS.. So I am up to 3 lays and 2 dates (2 great dates, still high IL from the girls). Tonight I have 2 options, going to the club with friends, or bedding a 4th girl that have texted me a couple of times - any thoughts on this? (friends or lay)?

 

[staystrong]

Day 36: had the worst nightmare about her last night, but it doesn't faze me anymore. Ironically in the dream, I was sleeping with one girl really in to me, but I kept leaving the bed to go find my ex. The message i got was that holding onto the past hinders grabbing the future.

 

[staystrong]

Day 37: I think I am 99.8% completely over my ex honestly. I cant believe I even dated her really. But i still need to work on me!! heres to friday night plates!

 

[European-DJ]

Dy 7

Yeas!!! I found my blazer!! So now I can go back to total NC!
/ the only time I miss her now is when I see a picture of her / us. Then my heart stops for a second.
Besides that I dooooont care... Damn it is great, compared to my first gf this is easy

 

[Rationale]

Day 5

In the grand scheme of things, I dare so I'm already almost over the whole thing.

Went out to my first club since the breakup. It was kind of weird for me. Went with a mixture of guys and girls, some of whom hooked up during the night with randoms.

One of the guys who hooked up went to me "man, I just get what I can" and it made me think. Yeah I wouldn't mind hooking up with someone, but I'm not going to just do it for the sake it, and with someone I don't regard within my standards.

My issue at the moment, is not so much related to my ex, but me. I guess what I'm after is a reaffirmation that I'm still capable of getting women, and the only way to do that, is to man up and do something about it - problem is, I've never done a random hook, so I it's something I need to look into and have a go at.

 

[sd.boi69]

our last talk was on February 13,2012 when I thought of inviting her for valentines day(but decided to cancel it since she was showing some attitude towards me because of some reasons i didn't know)... and still, up to now, I haven't contacted her... She even blocked me on facebook.. wow.... few more days and I am now on my way to 60 days of NC!!! and you know what, it's hard.. But all great things in life require some sort of self-discipline and some sacrifices(just like in being a MARINE... being a MARINE is what I wanna practice my whole life when it comes to being an emotionally STRONG guy.

 

[Darth]

My buddy did no contact. It took exactly 3 days for the girl to call him back, saying, "I was so wrong."

 

[staystrong]

Day 37:

"You hate being alone, you ain't the only one
you hate the fact that you bought the dream, and they sold you one" Drake

 

[staystrong]

Day 38: yesterday was the hardest day so far.
Not about my ex, more about my hollow inside feeling.
Slept at a friends house to escape it, and I feel good cuz I know I'm going to be better than just fine. I'm going to be fuucking fantastic even at my weakest.