Seriously, I have a draft that says something like that! Even though I would never send it, I just fell like telling her everything I have realized and learned from her dumping me! Haha.. Omg, this is so pathetic, I'm ranting like I had no other friends than her!Jariel said:...
The frustrating thing in all this is that I can see it all so clearly now and I've learned where I went wrong, and yet it's too late. You can't just contact your ex and say "Hey baby, you know how I used to be needy and you lost attraction for me? Well, I've figured it out now and I can be more of a challenge if you give me another chance". haha.
But the positive side of such a hard and painful lesson as this is that you're less likely to repeat it again.
Jariel said:Of course, not all cases are like this and some girls may have valid rational reasons for breaking it off. My gf ended with me before because of pressures in her home and personal life, but she still had strong feelings for me.
It's ultimately up to you what to do. There are similarities in all of the stories, but each case is unique. What didn't work for me may in fact get you back with your ex (if that's what you truly desire) I've read several stories on the web where a girl will break up with a guy, feel regrets, and never say a word to him about it. Yeah you can assume that if she isn't contacting you that she's happy with her decision, but the only way to know for certain...if you absolutely have to know...is to simply ask. Then again, if she regrets what she's done enough, one would think she'd reach out. Every case is different...dreww said:I feel like one day in the future, whether its 2 months or more of no contact, I could contact her somehow and let her know that I've realized I came across as needy and that's what ultimately ended the relationship. I've learned so much about myself and others simply by this breakup and I would really love to share that with her one more time. You guys have helped so much and I've realized you can't make one person your main source of happiness and that you have to love yourself and have your own life before you can love someone else and become part of their life in a healthy way. I want more than anything to be able to tell her these kinds of things at the end of 60 days whether I still have feelings for her or not, but it seems like everyone on here advises against recount acting your ex after starting the NC . Day 11 has been tough for me
I've thought about doing the same thing too, just dropping her a letter explaining everything, but what you must realise is that you're trying to appeal to a woman's emotions using logic and reason and they're completely different languages. She has to feel like she's missing you and wants to be with you and she won't get that feeling from words.dreww said:I feel like one day in the future, whether its 2 months or more of no contact, I could contact her somehow and let her know that I've realized I came across as needy and that's what ultimately ended the relationship. I've learned so much about myself and others simply by this breakup and I would really love to share that with her one more time. You guys have helped so much and I've realized you can't make one person your main source of happiness and that you have to love yourself and have your own life before you can love someone else and become part of their life in a healthy way. I want more than anything to be able to tell her these kinds of things at the end of 60 days whether I still have feelings for her or not, but it seems like everyone on here advises against recount acting your ex after starting the NC . Day 11 has been tough for me
Unfortunately, you have to be willing and able to do something about the distance, otherwise you're going to be in the exact same position as where you left.0cco said:Would you have any recommendations in this situation Jariel? If she still has strong feelings but a valid reason (distance)?
Jariel said:It's interesting how many of us felt our relationship change and eventually fall apart when we started being too nice and supplicating.
When women get complacent in a relationship, they will often get fat or make less effort with their appearance, whereas many of us men stop being a challenge and let our game slip.
In those cases, no contact is vitally important. If she lost attraction or respect for you, then NC is a last ditch effort to show her you don't need her and you're not the needy guy she thought you were.
Of course, not all cases are like this and some girls may have valid rational reasons for breaking it off. My gf ended with me before because of pressures in her home and personal life, but she still had strong feelings for me.
I think it's safe to say being nice and accommodating is definitely a relationship killer.
The frustrating thing in all this is that I can see it all so clearly now and I've learned where I went wrong, and yet it's too late. You can't just contact your ex and say "Hey baby, you know how I used to be needy and you lost attraction for me? Well, I've figured it out now and I can be more of a challenge if you give me another chance". haha.
But the positive side of such a hard and painful lesson as this is that you're less likely to repeat it again.
SamTheHobit said:After two months of no contact I saw her kissing another guy in a picture.
So I told her she was dead to me and that I fvcking hate her.
I think this is the best thing that could have happened to me.
After being on and off for 4 years I'm now truly done with her.
Lessons I've learned.
Women are dime a dozen.
You're idea of her and what she really is, is really deceptive.
A girl that used to be the sweetest can change into a devil.
I am better person than her.
She is lower than me.
A lesson on revenge.
Believe it or not the b1tch will gets what is coming to her.
No contact can be tough. And I truly think keeping all the sh1t you want to tell her in is bad news.
Let her fvckin have it. Yes no contact is important but if you truly need to get something off your chest do it.
Don't expect it to change anything.
Don't try to get her back.
If you think she's the only one. She's not.
Don't believe me??
How can we all think we had the "one" when there 3 billion more girls.
Life goes on. Don't dwell on it. It will get better.
Good luck.
SamTheHobit said:After two months of no contact I saw her kissing another guy in a picture.
This is pretty immature of you. You really shouldn't talk to your ex like that even though she's a seccubus. I've had to watch an ex of mine of 5 years marry another dude 6 months after we broke up. ****'s gonna happen like that. Don't waste your time. Be the bigger man, go talk to other chicks. You'll feel better real soon.So I told her she was dead to me and that I fvcking hate her.
That's rough. Sorry bro.Renegade357 said:LOL, here's some great advice for you.
Gotta love southpark.
This is pretty immature of you. You really shouldn't talk to your ex like that even though she's a seccubus. I've had to watch an ex of mine of 5 years marry another dude 6 months after we broke up. ****'s gonna happen like that. Don't waste your time. Be the bigger man, go talk to other chicks. You'll feel better real soon.
True, it's as dead as dead can be. I'm just saying that In my experience the way I handle a breakup directly correlates into my recovery time and my success with the next set of women. Maybe it's a karma thing I don't know. Anyway there is always someone better out there.SamTheHobit said:As about the immature part it really doesn't matter at this point.