My senior year and field reports

[BongDuy]

Nov 1 2009 Sunday
I wanted to Redeem myself and end my reoccuring nightmares of not kissing Monica. I texted her around 9:00 AM to hang out. I tell her im comming over with a movie so she asks her dad who surprisingly says " yes " without giving her a speech or lecture. I guess he doesn't see me as a theat. Unfortunately, I really didn't have any good DVD'S to bring over. Luckily, she tells me how she has some good movies, so i tell her ill come by later. Not to long after, she tells me to come over at 12:00 PM. for some reason, i didn't feel like questioning her, because i didn't want to come off as needy or something, so i simply replied with "Sure."

Parents
Got there and Monica answered the door. I didn't hug or kiss her because her dad was walking by, so i kinda awkwardly entered the house. Her dad greets me and I greet him back. At this point I had never met her mother, but she was just as surprisngly nice to me.

The movie
I take a seat and we decide to watch Disturbia. Her couch is pretty big, so i take a seat. I expected monica to sit next to me, so when she sat a few spaces to my right, I kinda felt confused. I decided to take matters into my own hands and scooted over to her, so i was atleast within range of putting my arm around her. While im moving, i ask " why are you so far away? I might get scared during this movie" ( not the smoothest DJ thing to say, but its just what i did ) Halfway through the movie, Her parents leave , but her younger brother is still home, chilling in his room which isn't really close to the TV area where me and Monica are. She pulls out this big ass pillow from nowhere and places it inbetween us. At first im a little lost, but she puts her head down on the pillow, so that her head is next to my thigh, but not very close at the same time. During the movie, I eventually sum up enough courage to put my hand on her shoulder. At first I just left my hand there, just motionless. Then i realized how "dead" it was, so i caressed her arm and a little bit of her back. She eventually made eye contact with me and I went to kiss her on the forehead. ( maybe a little weak, instead of a real kiss but i wanted a little variaty ) I was treated with a realitvely short kiss on the lips in return for this "romantic " move. Because her head was next to my thigh, I tried to play with her hair. Idk if its because it was in a bun or something, but it was really weird for me to touch her head. I felt really uncomfortable with this, even though i made several attempts to get at it. I get a lot of kino going on because im rubbing my hand against her back. I start thinking of the "push pull" effect where you kino a little, then take away and let her kino before you reward her with more kino but it didn't seem like she was really into that because she was laying down facing the TV. I tried to prevent my hand from going limp on her, so i tried stroking her back and stuff, im sure she enjoyed it.

When the movie is over, I say " Show me your room". I follow her into her room, and when im behind her, i place my hands against her hips as she points out some interesting photos on the wall. When she turns around, we get a little bit of a make out session, but its not very much. her excuse is " My brothers in the next room" and we leave her room together

Awkwardness with the fam...?
Her parents eventually get back home, and they begin cooking food. Because of the way my parents are, I tried not to eat with their family, especially since I barley knew them. When her dad told us it was time to eat, I said " oh no. I've got to get home" but he insisted. Monica even told me to come, as she locked arms with me and we walked into the kitchen to eat. I felt really awkward eating even though their whole family was pretty laid back and chilled. I don't have the best table manners, but the father kept reassuring me to "eat more". there was pasta, which is my favorite, so i ate two plates. Fortunately, Monica's brother has worse table manners than me because he was downing the food like a homeless person, so i relaxed a bit
and just tried to enjoy everyone's company. I didn't really say much, I sat there quietly but I kept a smile and made eye contact, so maybe I gave off a "modest confident" vibe. Her dad eventually asked me about what college i was going to but it got pretty silent after that. There was a small TV next to the table, so everyone was watching the Doplhins Vs giants. This is where I wish i knew a bit about football, so i could relate and connect with Monica's father and just the family in general, since they all love football and baseball as a whole. Oh did i mention I met her grandmother? yeah, she didn't speak english very well, but I tried to be as polite with the body language ( e.g. more smiling, and eye contact, and positive gestures )

After we ate, all of the guys in Monica's family ( Father and son, plus myself ) sat down in the TV room and watched "The sandlot". It seemed like all the girls were in the kitchen cleaning up, and I didn't realize it until 10 minutes in, so maybe i should of helped the girls out. Monica's father is a huge baseball fan so he loved watching this, and we connected well on our "favorite" scene, which is where the nerd kisses the lifeguard. It went pretty well. Monica and her sister eventually finished cleaning up and came back to the living room

Difficulty saying goodbye
For some reason I found it really difficult to eject after dinner.I just felt really out of place to leave , but eventually I summed up enough drive to leave during a commercial, since we were watching a movie toghether. I shook the father's hand, and said goodbye to everyone else and walked out, and monica came with me. we kissed, and at first I guess she was so used to "short" kisses we usually have, but I re connected with her before her lips were out of contact with mine, so we got a little bit of tongue. She left with a smile on her face.

Kino
I think im getting much better with kino. I did a lot of this, from the caressing her back while we were watching tv, to placind my hand on her legs. I felt more comfortable with it, but maybe its because I know shes interested in me. There was this scene where this girl was going topless, and I playfully covered her eyes. She ended up laughin a bit and held my hand as well.

However, Idk if this really matters, but she usually breaks off contact with me. As in she will decide how long I keep my arm around her, but i guess its because she doesn't want her parents to see me touching their daughter, even though she did tell them I was her boyfriend. Just throwing it out there. I wasn't sure if it was "okay" for me to hold her when her family would walk by, so i kinda just left it there. not the best move. Thoughts?

Failed Isolation
I tried not to mbate the whole day to motivate me to isolate her and make more of a move, which kinda worked. However, When I tried to isolate her it kinda backfired.heres the deal. Before we ate dinner, her parents were home but i wanted to isolate her for a bit. I ask " Do you have cable in your room? She replies " yeah of course" and i say " well let's go watch the show in there" and she says " bad idea... my dad, remmeber?" and i say " oh yeah..." and kinda laugh at myself for forgetting

My biggest problem?
I've never been introduced to another girl's family like this. I mean, there was alyssa's weird ass family, but I mean this is different. I actually care what they think, and I feel like things are moving a little fast. I mean, ive met the girl's grandmother for christ sake. I still haven't told her that we aren't "officialy" in a relationship, but im pretty sure by now its just assumed. I was thinking of bringing her back to my family so they can analyze her lol, my mom is pretty good at picking out who has a "positive" vibe, and who will bring me trouble because shes done it in the past with my previous friends, which has a 99.99% accuracy rating

 

[BongDuy]

November 2 2009
Saw Monica in the hallways and we walked around. It was just me and her, and we decided to sit at a bench, just me and her. At first she sat across from me, but she eventually got up and sat right next to me. We talked a bit, but it wasn't anything to great. It was actually a little weird. The convo was also weird, it was all over the place, deep to light, just a lot of rubbish. We both ended up mutually agreeing on how silent and awkward it was as well and to include some friends in our "circle" next time, which I plan to do so. I may introduce her to the Trio, because most of my other friends don't come in the morning, they arrive at different times throughout the day because of their unique class schedules.

Talking
So i feel like im messing around with this, getting used to sparking convos, and not lettting there be a deep silence. im getting better at this, but at the same time i feel like im screwing up because im not listening!!! Im actually probably talking a lot of bull**** out of my ass, and im sure she can sense that too, so i end up comming off as a bit boring. I need to get her to invest in the conversation more and i need to shut up, because sometimes i found myself interrupting her, which isn't good. So have her talk some more, and I should shut up and listen

Its official
Im walking her to class 2nd hour, and i mention how im late after walking her to class. I shouldn't have done this, but i ended up accidently saying it. She goes " aww, you don't have to walk me to class everyday." I replied " yeah i know. Aren't I the best....boyfriend, ever?" She catches the delay I slip when i say "boyfriend" and she calls me out on it. "You hesistated." I was confused at first, so I asked " what do you mean?". " You paused when you said boyfriend." I looked at her and didn't notice, but i had. " well yeah, I mean. are we official?" She looked at me and said " We might as well be, you're doing things so slow." I didn't say anything after that. I just thought about it. before I knew it, we were in front of the class, and she kissed me goodbye.


Time to meet my parents.
I guess its time to introduce her to my parents, as my girlfriend. not much to say here.

GOALS:

-Smash before my birthday ( november 26 )
-make more friends. Since im taken, i shouldn't be trying to get in every girl's pants. However, How do i stay out of the "friendzone" with certain girls, incase the relationship ends and i want to rebound quickly?

 

[BongDuy]

Before I post another update, I just wanted to mention how I don't have internet at my house anymore, because of some tech issues. I probably wont have it for another few days, im actually in the library hoping that no one is watching me type this stuff lmao.

11.03.09
Monica got dropped off by her sister, so we didn’t hang out in the morning. Instead, I hung out with just the trio, who im now just befriending to get more friends. So im walking out as usual but im running a little late. To my surprise Monica is waiting for me in the hallways by herself. When I get to her, she says “ oh there you are! I just sent you a text” It seemed like she really missed me because she held me for a good few seconds after we had our “greeting” kiss. Walked her to class, nothing special.

Makeout Kids.

After third period, we had an interesting moment. She waited outside my class, since shes right next door, and we kissed and I walked her to her spanish room. I opened the door for her, and she says “ aww thanks!” and I reply “ yup, aren’t I the best? I expect a good present for my birthday” since my birthday was this month. She mentions how she doesn’t know when my birthday is, and I tell her to take a guess. After a few tries I laugh at her and we decide to part ways. She gives me a quick peck and I smile, look at her, and say “ you still didn’t get my birthday.” She goes in for another kiss, this time with a bit more tongue. I hesitate and break away, I think I was caught off guard or something. We end up kissing again, this time her hand runs through my short hair. It was great, but totally unexpected. It probably sent me off the edge, because I had her “scent” around me all class period, so I couldn’t get her off my mind. I also realized how much I lusted for her because I really wanted to make out with her again.

Desperate times

I decided I would take another shot with another attempt for making out. After my 4th period, instead of going straight to lunch, I waited for her in the hallway since I knew what her next period was. I met her and we held hands, and lightly talked. It was really weird, I feel like sometimes I can’t get anything interesting to thread off of and get a convo flowing. I walked her to class and instead of making out with her, I we just pecked. Godammit, I hate having so little experience with kissing, it really throws everything off.
I felt like this was a huge screw up on my part. It showed Needyness and desperation. I just need to get my mind straight, so many things are happening so fast. On the bright side, I know im learning a lot of valuable lessons about dating through this. Atleast that’s what I think.

 

[Blurry]

With kissing, practice makes perfect. I remember that I used to be awful at it, until a series of 3 two hour long makeout sessions. I bet you already know this, but one good tip is to go for the neck while kissing.

 

[eaglez1177]

Time to digest

Nov 1 2009 Sunday
I wanted to Redeem myself and end my reoccuring nightmares of not kissing Monica. I texted her around 9:00 AMI hope you mean 9 pm...never text a girl as early as 9 am cuz theyre all asleep and will get mad if u wake them up to hang out. I tell her im comming over with a movie so she asks her dad who surprisingly says " yes " without giving her a speech or lecture. I guess he doesn't see me as a theat. Unfortunately, I really didn't have any good DVD'S to bring over. Luckily, she tells me how she has some good movies, so i tell her ill come by later. Not to long after, she tells me to come over at 12:00 PM.12 noon? So you did text her at 9 am lol. Why would u text her that early to hang out later that night. It'll make you come off as needy cuz shes prolly just woken up and ur already talkin to her bout tonite. Lay off her a bit and text her later in the day if u wanna hang at nite. for some reason, i didn't feel like questioning her, because i didn't want to come off as needy or something, so i simply replied with "Sure."

Parents
Got there and Monica answered the door. I didn't hug or kiss her because her dad was walking byshouldve at least hugged her, so i kinda awkwardly entered the house. Her dad greets me and I greet him back. At this point I had never met her mother, but she was just as surprisngly nice to me.

The movie
I take a seat and we decide to watch Disturbia. Her couch is pretty big, so i take a seat. I expected monica to sit next to me, so when she sat a few spaces to my right, I kinda felt confuseddont be confused, shes prolly just playin around with you to see ur reaction or see what youd o. I decided to take matters into my own hands and scooted over to her, so i was atleast within range of putting my arm around hergood job. While im moving, i ask " why are you so far away? I might get scared during this movie" I wouldve said, "why so far away, your gonna need me to hang on to when ur scared( not the smoothest DJ thing to say, but its just what i did ) Halfway through the movie, Her parents leave , but her younger brother is still home, chilling in his room which isn't really close to the TV area where me and Monica are. She pulls out this big ass pillow from nowhere and places it inbetween us. At first im a little lost, but she puts her head down on the pillow, so that her head is next to my thigh, but not very close at the same time. During the movie, I eventually sum up enough courage to put my hand on her shoulderYou need to "sum up courage" just to put your arm on her sholder? Im sorry but thats pretty pathetic...have more balls than that. At first I just left my hand there, just motionless. Then i realized how "dead" it was, so i caressed her arm and a little bit of her back. She eventually made eye contact with me and I went to kiss her on the forehead. ( maybe a little weak, instead of a real kiss but i wanted a little variaty ) I was treated with a realitvely short kiss on the lips in return for this "romantic " move. Because her head was next to my thigh, I tried to play with her hair. Idk if its because it was in a bun or something, but it was really weird for me to touch her head. I felt really uncomfortable with this, even though i made several attempts to get at it. I get a lot of kino going on because im rubbing my hand against her back.

When the movie is over, I say " Show me your room". I follow her into her room, and when im behind her, i place my hands against her hips as she points out some interesting photos on the wall. When she turns around, we get a little bit of a make out session, but its not very much.This is what i mean by not saying some dumb*ss line right before you kiss her! All you had to do was just place your hands around her hips and she immediately got the hint. Easy as that. her excuse is " My brothers in the next room" and we leave her room togetherA lot of girls are very paranoid about being caught doing stuff with guys by family members, so dont be suprised. If shes nervous, try to isolate her to a place where no one is around

Awkwardness with the fam...?
Her parents eventually get back home, and they begin cooking food. Because of the way my parents are, I tried not to eat with their family, especially since I barley knew them. When her dad told us it was time to eat, I said " oh no. I've got to get home" but he insisted. Monica even told me to come, as she locked arms with me and we walked into the kitchen to eat. I felt really awkward eating even though their whole family was pretty laid back and chilled. I don't have the best table manners, but the father kept reassuring me to "eat more". there was pasta, which is my favorite, so i ate two plates. Fortunately, Monica's brother has worse table manners than me because he was downing the food like a homeless person, so i relaxed a bit
and just tried to enjoy everyone's company. I didn't really say much, I sat there quietly but I kept a smile and made eye contact, so maybe I gave off a "modest confident" vibe.Always be as confident and talkative as possible when meeting a girls parents. They are judging your every move, and you only get one chance to make a good first impression Her dad eventually asked me about what college i was going to but it got pretty silent after that. There was a small TV next to the table, so everyone was watching the Doplhins Vs giants. This is where I wish i knew a bit about football, so i could relate and connect with Monica's father and just the family in general, since they all love football and baseball as a whole. Oh did i mention I met her grandmother? yeah, she didn't speak english very well, but I tried to be as polite with the body language ( e.g. more smiling, and eye contact, and positive gestures )

Difficulty saying goodbye
For some reason I found it really difficult to eject after dinner.I just felt really out of place to leave , but eventually I summed up enough drive to leave during a commercial, since we were watching a movie toghether. I shook the father's hand, and said goodbye to everyone else and walked out, and monica came with me. we kissed, and at first I guess she was so used to "short" kisses we usually have, but I re connected with her before her lips were out of contact with mine, so we got a little bit of tongue. She left with a smile on her face.Thats good

Kino
I think im getting much better with kino.I can tell I did a lot of this, from the caressing her back while we were watching tv, to placind my hand on her legs. I felt more comfortable with it, but maybe its because I know shes interested in me. There was this scene where this girl was going topless, and I playfully covered her eyes. She ended up laughin a bit and held my hand as well. Just for the record, if a girl decides to lay down like that on that couch, its usually a sign that she wants you to lay down right next to her and cuddle with her. Think of how awkward and weird it looks if the girl is laying down and ur just sitting up. In that situation I wouldve laid down right next to her, gotten really close to her, and REALLY amped up the kino to a very sexual level.

However, Idk if this really matters, but she usually breaks off contact with me. As in she will decide how long I keep my arm around her, but i guess its because she doesn't want her parents to see me touching their daughter, even though she did tell them I was her boyfriend. Just throwing it out there. I wasn't sure if it was "okay" for me to hold her when her family would walk by, so i kinda just left it there. not the best move. Thoughts?Talk to her about it. See where shes at regarding you touching her and her family so you dont stay confused. Just be like "Looks like you seem kinda nervous when im up close to you/touching you when ur family is around" and see what she says. Most girls will admit that they do in fact feel weird being touched by a guy in front of their family

Failed Isolation
I tried not to mbate the whole day to motivate me to isolate her and make more of a move, which kinda worked. However, When I tried to isolate her it kinda backfired.heres the deal. Before we ate dinner, her parents were home but i wanted to isolate her for a bit. I ask " Do you have cable in your room? She replies " yeah of course" and i say " well let's go watch the show in there" and she says " bad idea... my dad, remmeber?" and i say " oh yeah..." and kinda laugh at myself for forgettingHang out with her (ur house or hers) when the parents arent home. Thats when things REALLY get going. The parent issue is a tough obstacle, and theres not much you can do to fix it besides just making attempts to get to a place in the house behind a locked door or away from them.

My biggest problem?
I've never been introduced to another girl's family like this. I mean, there was alyssa's weird ass family, but I mean this is different. I actually care what they think, and I feel like things are moving a little fast. I mean, ive met the girl's grandmother for christ sake. I still haven't told her that we aren't "officialy" in a relationship, but im pretty sure by now its just assumed. I was thinking of bringing her back to my family so they can analyze her lol, my mom is pretty good at picking out who has a "positive" vibe, and who will bring me trouble because shes done it in the past with my previous friends, which has a 99.99% accuracy rating

 

[eaglez1177]

The end is important

November 2 2009
Saw Monica in the hallways and we walked around. It was just me and her, and we decided to sit at a bench, just me and her. At first she sat across from me, but she eventually got up and sat right next to me. We talked a bit, but it wasn't anything to great. It was actually a little weird. The convo was also weird, it was all over the place, deep to light, just a lot of rubbish. We both ended up mutually agreeing on how silent and awkward it was as well and to include some friends in our "circle" next time, which I plan to do soYou both agreed on how silent and awkward it was? That is not good AT ALL man. You really need to try harder to keep the convos flowing smoothly. if you cant even carry a conversation with this chick, then you should be NOWHERES NEAR making her your gf. I may introduce her to the Trio, because most of my other friends don't come in the morning, they arrive at different times throughout the day because of their unique class schedules.

Talking
So i feel like im messing around with this, getting used to sparking convos, and not lettting there be a deep silence. im getting better at this, but at the same time i feel like im screwing up because im not listening!!! Im actually probably talking a lot of bull**** out of my ass, and im sure she can sense that too, so i end up comming off as a bit boring. I need to get her to invest in the conversation more and i need to shut up, because sometimes i found myself interrupting her, which isn't good. So have her talk some more, and I should shut up and listen Thats great I think you should def work on that. Listening is the most important part of a conversation.

Its official
Im walking her to class 2nd hour, and i mention how im late after walking her to class. I shouldn't have done this, but i ended up accidently saying it. She goes " aww, you don't have to walk me to class everyday." I replied " yeah i know. Aren't I the best....boyfriend, ever?" She catches the delay I slip when i say "boyfriend" and she calls me out on it. "You hesistated." I was confused at first, so I asked " what do you mean?". " You paused when you said boyfriend." I looked at her and didn't notice, but i had. " well yeah, I mean. are we official?" She looked at me and said " We might as well be, you're doing things so slow." I didn't say anything after that. I just thought about it. before I knew it, we were in front of the class, and she kissed me goodbye. Ahhh damnnn thats a majorrrr bust on your part man. Did you even intend on making her your gf or did it just slip out? You did that whole thing with very low confidence, I mean you didnt even say you wanted her to be your gf, you kinda just asked her if you guys were already. Not good.


Time to meet my parents.
I guess its time to introduce her to my parents, as my girlfriend. not much to say here.

GOALS:

-Smash before my birthday ( november 26 )
-make more friends. Since im taken, i shouldn't be trying to get in every girl's pants. However, How do i stay out of the "friendzone" with certain girls, incase the relationship ends and i want to rebound quickly?This is a very tough part of being a DJ. Having a gf while at the same time keeping girls on the side that you can always bounce on to if things ever go south with your gf. You have to game all these girls up as you normally would, but just dont escalate with them. Keep the kino going with them, flirt a little bit, but dont make it extremely obvious, make it seem like something "secret" between you and the girl. Make it seem like you "secretly" want her. Last thing you want is coming on to a girl so hard that she mentions it to her friends or your gf that you were clearing hitting on her.

Before I post another update, I just wanted to mention how I don't have internet at my house anymore, because of some tech issues. I probably wont have it for another few days, im actually in the library hoping that no one is watching me type this stuff lmao.

11.03.09
Monica got dropped off by her sister, so we didn’t hang out in the morning. Instead, I hung out with just the trio, who im now just befriending to get more friends. So im walking out as usual but im running a little late. To my surprise Monica is waiting for me in the hallways by herself. When I get to her, she says “ oh there you are! I just sent you a text” It seemed like she really missed me because she held me for a good few seconds after we had our “greeting” kiss. Walked her to class, nothing special.

Makeout Kids.

After third period, we had an interesting moment. She waited outside my class, since shes right next door, and we kissed and I walked her to her spanish room. I opened the door for her, and she says “ aww thanks!” and I reply “ yup, aren’t I the best? I expect a good present for my birthday” since my birthday was this month. She mentions how she doesn’t know when my birthday is, and I tell her to take a guess. After a few tries I laugh at her and we decide to part ways. She gives me a quick peck and I smile, look at her, and say “ you still didn’t get my birthday.” She goes in for another kiss, this time with a bit more tongue. I hesitate and break away, I think I was caught off guard or something.Caught off guard? Why would you even be on guard in the first place? You should always want to kiss her We end up kissing again, this time her hand runs through my short hair. It was great, but totally unexpected.You should be the one doing unexpected things to her. Girls love that. It probably sent me off the edge, because I had her “scent” around me all class period, so I couldn’t get her off my mind. I also realized how much I lusted for her because I really wanted to make out with her again. Lol I know EXACTLY how this feels. Its pretty amazing how a girls scent can keep her in your mind so much. Not only that, but when I went out with my ex gf, she always had on this unique perfume. Whenever I walked through the hallways in school, walked around at home, walked by various different girls, or did anything, sometimes I would smell something that would smell kinda like my gf's perfume, and then instantly I would start thinking about my gf. Dunno if this has happened to you yet, but it will. The sense of smell is a very strong reminder of people.

Desperate times

I decided I would take another shot with another attempt for making out. After my 4th period, instead of going straight to lunch, I waited for her in the hallway since I knew what her next period was. I met her and we held hands, and lightly talked. It was really weird, I feel like sometimes I can’t get anything interesting to thread off of and get a convo flowing.This is ur gf and you cant even get convos flowing? Not good I walked her to class and instead of making out with her, I we just pecked. Godammit, I hate having so little experience with kissing, it really throws everything off.Listen dude, she is your fvcking GIRLFRIEND. Stop thinking and worrying so much about how ur gonna kiss her. Just fvcking do it! Shes ur gf you can kiss her however you want! I used to full on makeout with my girlfriend in the middle of school or outside the classroom for minutes at a time. Ive had MANY teachers go to me telling me to get to class and stop "feeling up", "groping", or "having sex" (figuratively) in the hallway with my gf. Next time you see her in school and walk her to a class, I want you to do this:

1. Put your right hand on her very lower back/ass
2. With your right hand, pull her right in very close to your body
3. Take your left hand, put it on her cheek/neck/in hair
4. Fvcking make out with her and stick your fvcking tongue right in there and keep on making out with her until she pulls away
5. This will fvcking turn her on soooo much you have no idea. I SWEAR TO YOU it will increase your sexual level with her so much more, and will get her so fvckin horny she wont know how to control herself. You'l score major points if you do this, TRUST ME
.
I felt like this was a huge screw up on my part. It showed Needyness and desperation. I just need to get my mind straight, so many things are happening so fast. On the bright side, I know im learning a lot of valuable lessons about dating through this. Atleast that’s what I think.

 

[sageproduct]

Hey man, just read all of that. Seems tough but you're hangin in there.

About convo:
About 2 weeks ago I felt like I was really struggling with keeping conversation going, but then something just clicked and I've been making amazing conversation and never hitting silence. I think the key points that brought me out of my struggles were:
1. don't think about anything else as you are talking to someone. If you're having a separate train of thought it really disconnects you guys cuz sometimes they won't be following what you say.
2. when in doubt, just use whatever the other person says to continue. Speculate, paraphrase what they said, and offer something similar from yourself. This always seems to keep it going and right now I feel like I can make conversation out of anything. When they answer your questions, just probe deeper and lately I've been feeling like there's every opportunity to add a bit of humor.
3. idk if you already do this but I find speaking slowly and clearly helps because you have more time to form your words before they come out. this makes you sound more intelligent and makes the conversation less awkward and business-y.
4. What I seem to do naturally with girls is just create inside jokes with them. Literally every single girl I know I have a set of inside jokes with. I just seem to do it naturally. It's so good because I've just literally made myself something to say randomly that will make her laugh EVERY time. When you get a hit (she thinks something's funny), just bring it back up periodically and it turns into an ongoing joke.

Can't really help you with the kissing/sexual stuff haah, but...if there's one thing I'm ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE I can help you in, it's parents. I don't know why, but I'm naturally just amazing with parents. Every single friend's parents I have met LOVE me. I don't know why I'm so good at it but here's what I do:
1. When my friend and their parents are both there and we're all kind of talking, I actually pay much more attention to the parents than the friend. Kind of funny/weird.
2. Always know what you want to do with your life/future. Parents love kids with future plans and goals.
3. Don't be afraid to be humorous with them. Of course, you have to be extra careful when talking to parents about what kind of jokes you make, but at least for me it doesn't seem to hard to get a sense for what they'll find funny and what they won't appreciate.
4. Compliment on random ****. If you don't know where to start, complimenting on ANYTHING about their house works beautifully. This is great too because usually when you see parents it'll be at their own houses. At HC this year I was in a group with people I didn't know so I told the host girl's dad what a nice house they did and he got ecstatic. He loved me and started telling me all this **** about his house and the whole conversation turned towards it. Haha. They love their houses.
5. Pretend like what they say is the most interesting thing in the world. Even if you couldn't give less of a ****. I've always done this naturally. I always say "wow, that's amazing" and blah blah blah to friends' mom and dads when I truly don't give a **** at all.
6. Once the conversation gets going a bit, you can ask them about their jobs or anything that's related to their career. I guess when you're an adult, life sucks and your mind is filled with stuff related to your job. They like talking about it I guess, and once again, feign interest.
7. Nod. I literally just agree with everything they say. Haha. If you actually know something about what they're talking about, they'll love you.
8. This is mostly for dads, especially dads of girls. I ALWAYS hold eye contact and idk why but I've always had the instinct of making sure I don't show ANY kind of fear toward them. Maybe it's because I've imagined myself in the situation of if my daughter brought some guy home, and I'd want him to be a real man instead of some scrawny kid who's scared to look at me. If you shake hands, do it like a real man. Knowledge of sports does help. One year ago, I knew less about sports than a dead person does. Now, I'm an absolute sports nut. I can connect with any man who's interested in sports instantly, so this works with dads.
9. Manners. Once again, I'm a naturally overpolite kid (though i only do this with adults now, i'm not so 'polite' when i'm talking to girls...hehe), but in general:
Say thanks for any small thing they do
Thank them for "having you over". I overdo this and say it about twice every time. Once when I get there, and again when I leave.
Always ask if you can help out with something.

That's about everything. So basically, give them compliments, pretend like what they're talking about is the most interesting thing you've ever heard (adults love to tell stories, their lives are stressful so they like to get stuff off their back), let them talk, agree, appreciate, be respectful and polite. And show more interest in them than their kids when they're both around.

2 more things I wanna say.
1. Dolphins vs. Giants? Didn't happen this week man, the Dolphins played the Jets and the Giants played the Eagles...hahaha but for football knowledge, I'd say just learn some names of the players if you wanna connect with the family. I'm guessing they're Dolphins fans since you're in that area? Just learn the names of some of the marquee players and talk about how good they are. haha
2. about the feeling weird eating at someone else's house...is this an asian thing? I think it's the way my parents raised me, but I always have a natural inclination to decline everything that is offered to me when I'm at someone's house. I have a hard time accepting even a glass of water, let alone a dinner. My parents always told me not to do this cuz it would make me "owe" them? I still haven't gotten over this psychologically, it's really weird. My parents have made me think that I'm "stealing" whatever it is they're offering me and spending their money.

 

[evcemerald]

this thread's sweet maan. its like your very own personal diary.

You're representing a lot of teenagers here man and just by reading it emits inspiration. I'm inspired as hell seeing you progress. keep it up.
Cheers!

 

[BongDuy]

11.3.09
Monica was dropped by her sis so i didnt see her till i walked her to class. I walked her to class, and i asked her what she was doin saturday. I told her my dog wanted to meet her, which was just a joke to invite her over to meet my family.. Thinkin about it now i dont think i got a direct answer, but she did mention how she was soo nervous, and how she would be intimidated. I told her not to worry because I would translate everything, in a humorous tone. When we kissed goodbye, and i tried to make out but she had gum in her mouth so idk if she didnt want me to steal it because she seemed to hold back. I ended up saying " that gum taste good" , which isnt the coolest thing to say either but i just said it. lol?

When i walked her to her other class, and tried to make out with her, she said "not in public" i replied with a " fvck them, they already know" with a smile on my face. I wish I said something like " your loss" she ended up walking away. Instantly it made me think of how she tends to control things like how long we kiss or what we do in public.

 

[thedoc]

Hey man, just read all of that. Seems tough but you're hangin in there.

About convo:
About 2 weeks ago I felt like I was really struggling with keeping conversation going, but then something just clicked and I've been making amazing conversation and never hitting silence. I think the key points that brought me out of my struggles were:
1. don't think about anything else as you are talking to someone. If you're having a separate train of thought it really disconnects you guys cuz sometimes they won't be following what you say.
2. when in doubt, just use whatever the other person says to continue. Speculate, paraphrase what they said, and offer something similar from yourself. This always seems to keep it going and right now I feel like I can make conversation out of anything. When they answer your questions, just probe deeper and lately I've been feeling like there's every opportunity to add a bit of humor.
3. idk if you already do this but I find speaking slowly and clearly helps because you have more time to form your words before they come out. this makes you sound more intelligent and makes the conversation less awkward and business-y.
4. What I seem to do naturally with girls is just create inside jokes with them. Literally every single girl I know I have a set of inside jokes with. I just seem to do it naturally. It's so good because I've just literally made myself something to say randomly that will make her laugh EVERY time. When you get a hit (she thinks something's funny), just bring it back up periodically and it turns into an ongoing joke.

Can't really help you with the kissing/sexual stuff haah, but...if there's one thing I'm ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE I can help you in, it's parents. I don't know why, but I'm naturally just amazing with parents. Every single friend's parents I have met LOVE me. I don't know why I'm so good at it but here's what I do:
1. When my friend and their parents are both there and we're all kind of talking, I actually pay much more attention to the parents than the friend. Kind of funny/weird.
2. Always know what you want to do with your life/future. Parents love kids with future plans and goals.
3. Don't be afraid to be humorous with them. Of course, you have to be extra careful when talking to parents about what kind of jokes you make, but at least for me it doesn't seem to hard to get a sense for what they'll find funny and what they won't appreciate.
4. Compliment on random ****. If you don't know where to start, complimenting on ANYTHING about their house works beautifully. This is great too because usually when you see parents it'll be at their own houses. At HC this year I was in a group with people I didn't know so I told the host girl's dad what a nice house they did and he got ecstatic. He loved me and started telling me all this **** about his house and the whole conversation turned towards it. Haha. They love their houses.
5. Pretend like what they say is the most interesting thing in the world. Even if you couldn't give less of a ****. I've always done this naturally. I always say "wow, that's amazing" and blah blah blah to friends' mom and dads when I truly don't give a **** at all.
6. Once the conversation gets going a bit, you can ask them about their jobs or anything that's related to their career. I guess when you're an adult, life sucks and your mind is filled with stuff related to your job. They like talking about it I guess, and once again, feign interest.
7. Nod. I literally just agree with everything they say. Haha. If you actually know something about what they're talking about, they'll love you.
8. This is mostly for dads, especially dads of girls. I ALWAYS hold eye contact and idk why but I've always had the instinct of making sure I don't show ANY kind of fear toward them. Maybe it's because I've imagined myself in the situation of if my daughter brought some guy home, and I'd want him to be a real man instead of some scrawny kid who's scared to look at me. If you shake hands, do it like a real man. Knowledge of sports does help. One year ago, I knew less about sports than a dead person does. Now, I'm an absolute sports nut. I can connect with any man who's interested in sports instantly, so this works with dads.
9. Manners. Once again, I'm a naturally overpolite kid (though i only do this with adults now, i'm not so 'polite' when i'm talking to girls...hehe), but in general:
Say thanks for any small thing they do
Thank them for "having you over". I overdo this and say it about twice every time. Once when I get there, and again when I leave.
Always ask if you can help out with something.

That's about everything. So basically, give them compliments, pretend like what they're talking about is the most interesting thing you've ever heard (adults love to tell stories, their lives are stressful so they like to get stuff off their back), let them talk, agree, appreciate, be respectful and polite. And show more interest in them than their kids when they're both around.

2 more things I wanna say.
1. Dolphins vs. Giants? Didn't happen this week man, the Dolphins played the Jets and the Giants played the Eagles...hahaha but for football knowledge, I'd say just learn some names of the players if you wanna connect with the family. I'm guessing they're Dolphins fans since you're in that area? Just learn the names of some of the marquee players and talk about how good they are. haha
2. about the feeling weird eating at someone else's house...is this an asian thing? I think it's the way my parents raised me, but I always have a natural inclination to decline everything that is offered to me when I'm at someone's house. I have a hard time accepting even a glass of water, let alone a dinner. My parents always told me not to do this cuz it would make me "owe" them? I still haven't gotten over this psychologically, it's really weird. My parents have made me think that I'm "stealing" whatever it is they're offering me and spending their money.

Seriously, be careful with that parent stuff. I completely understand what you've described but there's a fine line between being super polite and being a complete b1tch. It's different with every set of parents, but be especially careful with the dad, you sure as hell don't want him thinking her daughter brought home the biggest chump of the school. The mom usually you can kiss-up as much as you want she'll enjoy is (usually).

About the food... My parents raised me and still are super strict, hell I have an 11:00 curfew still. But what I've learned is don't be afraid not to eat. If you've offered to leave/not to eat and they're insisting like crazy, go ahead, eat as much as you want! Trust me, they'll enjoy feeding you. Think about it from their perspective, they would probably feel bad or in extreme cases offended that you don't want to eat their food.

Now, there's one more thing Duy that really bothers me when I read it. You say that she always breaks off contact, or ends the kiss or whatever. Start breaking it off early yourself. Make her savor every second she holds your hand or kisses you. I know you enjoy holding her hand and kissing her but in the long run it will definitely pay off. Notice how when you said you once broke off the kiss and did some new stuff she loved it. Well, keep taking control like that and don't be afraid to break off contact first, she'll be dying to get it back. Once again, think of it from her point of view.

 

[eaglez1177]

Time to digest

11.3.09
Monica was dropped by her sis so i didnt see her till i walked her to class. I walked her to class, and i asked her what she was doin saturday. I told her my dog wanted to meet her, which was just a joke to invite her over to meet my family.. Thinkin about it now i dont think i got a direct answer, but she did mention how she was soo nervous, and how she would be intimidated.Lol every girl worries about this when theyre about to meet a guys parents I told her not to worry because I would translate everything, in a humorous tone. When we kissed goodbye, and i tried to make out but she had gum in her mouth so idk if she didnt want me to steal it because she seemed to hold back.Exchanging gum while hookin up can actually be a very fun game to play with ur gf or any girl I ended up saying " that gum taste good" , which isnt the coolest thing to say either but i just said it. lol?

When i walked her to her other class, and tried to make out with her, she said "not in public" i replied with a " fvck them, they already know" with a smile on my face. I wish I said something like " your loss" she ended up walking away.Then why didnt you say that? And she walked away? That would piss me off. Next time she tries to kiss you in public i'd stick it back at her and go in for a kiss, but then back out right before you touch lips and say "Oh wait, your afraid of being in public", and then walk away. See how she likes it. (you shud def do that, trust me that wud teach her a lesson, and def put you in more control) Instantly it made me think of how she tends to control things like how long we kiss or what we do in public.DO NOT let her be the controller of things in the relationship. YOU have to be the controller, and YOU have to be the one that has the ability to walk away from her at any time (and by walk away I mean dump her).

 

[sageproduct]

Seriously, be careful with that parent stuff. I completely understand what you've described but there's a fine line between being super polite and being a complete b1tch. It's different with every set of parents, but be especially careful with the dad, you sure as hell don't want him thinking her daughter brought home the biggest chump of the school. The mom usually you can kiss-up as much as you want she'll enjoy is (usually).

About the food... My parents raised me and still are super strict, hell I have an 11:00 curfew still. But what I've learned is don't be afraid not to eat. If you've offered to leave/not to eat and they're insisting like crazy, go ahead, eat as much as you want! Trust me, they'll enjoy feeding you. Think about it from their perspective, they would probably feel bad or in extreme cases offended that you don't want to eat their food.

Now, there's one more thing Duy that really bothers me when I read it. You say that she always breaks off contact, or ends the kiss or whatever. Start breaking it off early yourself. Make her savor every second she holds your hand or kisses you. I know you enjoy holding her hand and kissing her but in the long run it will definitely pay off. Notice how when you said you once broke off the kiss and did some new stuff she loved it. Well, keep taking control like that and don't be afraid to break off contact first, she'll be dying to get it back. Once again, think of it from her point of view.

Very true. It just seems to me he's on the other end of the spectrum right now, so he shouldn't really worry right now about being a suckup to the parents.

And I'm not advising sucking up either, even if what I'm saying seems like it. These concepts were actually talked about in Dale Carnegie's book How To Win Friends and Influence People (ironically, my dad, the most antisocial person i know, mde me read it). Don't say anything that's not true, but try to find true things that you can compliment.

 

[HookEm']

November 2 2009
Saw Monica in the hallways and we walked around. It was just me and her, and we decided to sit at a bench, just me and her. At first she sat across from me, but she eventually got up and sat right next to me. We talked a bit, but it wasn't anything to great. It was actually a little weird. The convo was also weird, it was all over the place, deep to light, just a lot of rubbish. We both ended up mutually agreeing on how silent and awkward it was as well and to include some friends in our "circle" next time, which I plan to do so. I may introduce her to the Trio, because most of my other friends don't come in the morning, they arrive at different times throughout the day because of their unique class schedules.

Talking
So i feel like im messing around with this, getting used to sparking convos, and not lettting there be a deep silence. im getting better at this, but at the same time i feel like im screwing up because im not listening!!! Im actually probably talking a lot of bull**** out of my ass, and im sure she can sense that too, so i end up comming off as a bit boring. I need to get her to invest in the conversation more and i need to shut up, because sometimes i found myself interrupting her, which isn't good. So have her talk some more, and I should shut up and listen

Its official
Im walking her to class 2nd hour, and i mention how im late after walking her to class. I shouldn't have done this, but i ended up accidently saying it. She goes " aww, you don't have to walk me to class everyday." I replied " yeah i know. Aren't I the best....boyfriend, ever?" She catches the delay I slip when i say "boyfriend" and she calls me out on it. "You hesistated." I was confused at first, so I asked " what do you mean?". " You paused when you said boyfriend." I looked at her and didn't notice, but i had. " well yeah, I mean. are we official?" She looked at me and said " We might as well be, you're doing things so slow." I didn't say anything after that. I just thought about it. before I knew it, we were in front of the class, and she kissed me goodbye.


Time to meet my parents.
I guess its time to introduce her to my parents, as my girlfriend. not much to say here.

GOALS:

-Smash before my birthday ( november 26 )
-make more friends. Since im taken, i shouldn't be trying to get in every girl's pants. However, How do i stay out of the "friendzone" with certain girls, incase the relationship ends and i want to rebound quickly?

ADD A BOY DUY! You came close enough in her room!

 

[BongDuy]

11.05.09

Practice makes perfect
So sometimes I feel a really strong urge to be with Monica. To hold her, to lust her, to feel her. That started to get me thinking that this whole relationship is built on sex appeal, even though she isnt the most sexy girl in the school, the fact that shes my girlfriend makes her more attractive to me. I don't look at her the same way i used to, i now see her as a potential lay and it really gets me going. When this urge isn't satisfied i feel a bit down, as if im catching one itus for her. To counter this, I look at Monica as "Practice". Whenever I get some type of emotional attachment to her, i think try and remind myself that shes just for "practice", even though not something I would ever consider. It's actually the total opposite of me, and i kinda don't like considering any girl as an "object", but if it will help me stay in control and focused, It'll probably do more good than harm.

nothing but Sex
I also support the fact that our relationship is based on physical appearance because we don't seem to connect well on the mental level. I'm not sure if its because we don't really spend enough alone time getting to know each other or anything, but it seems like we aren't very similar people. our humor is different, our music taste is different, and even our friends kinda vary, although we share a common few. When im with her, we just bs talk a lot. Lately I haven't had much alone time with her at all. Infact, I only see her when i walk her to the hallways. I want to hang out with her outside of school, but i just feel like there are so many things affecting us.
1) I don't want to seem desperate and have that much spare time to spend with her.
2) Are her parents home? Is her sister home? Her brother? I feel like this'll effect me somehow. Maybe im over thinking.
3) What will we do together? She tells me all she does at home is " Homework and watch TV". I don't want to come over to watch her TV in her living room all day. Do people usually hang out on the weekdays, as in going out at night or something? Again, maybe im making this that much harder than it has to be.

An unexpected Phobia?
I think I found out why I have such a big problem making out/ escalating with Monica. It seems to be a sticking point because, honestly, this is the first girl i've ever gotten this far with. I've kissed Monica more times than I can even count, I average about 6 a day ( not to brag of course). but thats not the problem. The problem is IM SCARED of SUCESS!! yeah you heard me! "you're out of your mind! you're crazy about success?! HOW!" you ask. I feel like if I do success, i dont know where to go. Like ive said before, i've never been this far with a girl. I feel lost and unexperience, I fear the unknown. Of course the only way to get over this fear is just to keep pushing and trial and error. I just thought it'd be an interesting note to post, because i never knew there was such a thing, which may explain why sometimes I may pull away first when we kiss, because Im scared of escalating.

A little too much of anything can be bad, right?
So I noticed yesterday when I was with my cousin at their house, my uncle approached me and started talking to me about joining the Navy and doing all this crazy stuff. I of course, Just sat there, keeping a strong confident eye contact level, nodding to him talking, and just trying to be socially polite. I noticed that I found myself internaly disagreeing with him, but because I didn't want to talk to him, I wanted to just nod him away by agreeing with everything he said so he would get it out of his system, get bored of me, and walk away. I also noticed I was smiling at him. Smiling. Nodding. and then it hit me. Is there such thing as smiling too much?? I mean, is it good to fake smiles like that? sometimes in school i find myself as labeled as the guy who "laughs at any joke", so maybe that is making my laughs less genuine. My teacher also calls me optimistic, but thats probably because I aways answer things with a
" well we didn't come in last place."
"It wasn't good", "but it wasn't bad either."
Or " It could of been much worse"

The dangerous "L" word
What are some ways to replace "love" for now? I don't want to be the first to say it, especially this early. So far i've come up with ..............
" I adore you "

Okay enough self reflection. heres some intersting things me and monica do.
So Monica Sends me a text message everyday she doesn't come to school by bus, letting me know that she won't see me in the morning because sometimes her family drops her off by car. I take that as a good sign because if i missed school, i wouldn't even text her or tell her until the next day when she asks " Where were you yesterday?". to clear things up, here is my schedule
1) English - If i see her in the morning, she walks me to class. After, I wait for her and walk her to her 2nd hour
2) Physics - I dont see her at all during this time.
3) Ap Government - because of the way our two classes are set up, we're side by side with a door connecting us two. I can walk through her class, see her, and get to my class, but i usually don't. After class, I walk her to her spanish class. This is typically where most of my reports come from. This is also the last time I see her, unless I want to really go out of my way to see her, which I don't really do.

We always kiss when we greet each other, and when we say goodbye. its becomming pretty routine, but because I want to keep things interesting, I may switch it up. We also typically hold hands, but I also want to change that up because Variety never hurt anyone.
I have a total of 7 classes, but because I dont see her after 3rd, I won't bother listing them.

Anyways, now to my day.
after 1st hour, I walked her to class. Nothing really interesting happen here, but I had one of my school spirit wrist bands on, and I remembered how i accidently sprayed it with my cologne. I thought it would be a good idea to give it to Monica, to leave my "Scent" around her, so she would think about me a bit more. She wore a jacket though, so i don't think she got a good whiff of it at all.

Saw her after my 3rd period, and we walked together, hand in hand. for the first time in the relationship, i broke the hand hold once or twice. I noticed that when I did, I caught a glare of her hand a few seconds after i broke contact. She had her hand by her side, as if she wanted me to grab it again, like she felt weird without me holding her. I take that as a good sign.

As we walked downstairs, I saw a friend of mine named Shelby. She's not really important, but she's Monica's good friend, because they're both on the softball team. A while back, Shelby told me that she was jealous because when Im with Monica, She never gets a hug from her. So when Monica raced to hug shelby. I playfully told monica the whole situtation, and told her playfully that i was "dissappointed in her" ( if it sounds weird, take it as an inside joke), as i broke off hand contact and continued walking her to class.she told me to hold her hand, but instead, i put my arm around her shoulder. When I did, she said she didn't really enjoy it and kinda shrugged it off. oddly enough, after we walked a few steps, she said " okay i was joking, you can put your arm back". Of course, I didn't, I think i just looked at her and continued walking without any contact with her. I continued walking her to class, as we entered her hallway.

* This hallway is a little special. after a few meters, there is a corridor area out of sight to the right, that leads to the nurse's office. This area is kinda hidden and more private than the hallway itself. *

As we approached this little corridor, I grabbed Monica's hand and pulled her in with me, as we stood there together, hidden from plain sight. I immediately kissed her and began attemping to make out with her. I raised my hand to stroke her hair but as soon as it made contact with her, Monica and I are interrupted by a Lady attempting to get into the nurse's office. Talk about c0ckblocking....
The moment is ruined and before I know it, we continue to walk down the hallway, towards her class. I see another corner, that isn't as "hidden" as the special corridor before, but I figure its better than nothing. I give it a shot, and she holds back and we make eye contact as she says the words " no duy." We look into each others eyes for a few more seconds, and she says to me " alright, ill cya later". She wraps her arms around me and we slowly begin to get closer, and closer. I hold back and say " not in public". Once she heard what I had said she replied " oh cmon duy....Fine." probably a little frustrated, but also in a light tone. I turn around and begin to walk away. Suddenly I feel a grip on my forearm, pulling me back. It's monica. I turn around and we meet each other by the lips for a kiss. Not a make out session, just a kiss.
As I walked away i thought to myself... " Did i screw up? "

 

[BongDuy]

11.06.09 I GOT MY INTERNET BACK!!!!

School
Today I didn't see Monica at all today in school. Today was senior skip day, and for most of the day I was in the auditorium getting some lecture on improving yourself, and your "inner game". It made me think about those things PUA host, but for improving your beliefs and ways of seeing things. It costs 127$ and it's called Pulse or something similiar, with only 40 spots open for everyone. I ended up rejecting the idea, it really seemed like a cult or something. maybe im being harsh.

Invite
I got a text from a friend Marissa inviting me to go with the girl's volleyball team to the football game tonight. Because Tonight was the last night for football season, i decided i would go. I get picked up around 4:30 by Marissa, and we get some stuff from publix and head to school. While going there, We end up on the topic of the coach, and Marissa says " yeah, she actually really likes you." so I guess I have her approval, if that matters at all.

Painting
So when we get to school, we go into the portables, where the coach's room is. I enter and im the only guy there, and at first i wasn't really noticed. The coach was busy painting some girl's face for the game and everyone else was getting a letter to spell out " C O U G A R S" on their stomachs. I see Monica laying on a table, letting her stomach dry out from the paint and as i get closer, we hold hands and i kiss her while shes laying down. Suddenly the room's attention turns to me, as everyone goes "aww!" or "it's monica's boyfriend!"
long story short, I got my stomach painted with a Paw print, and when I took my shirt off, all the girls went " oh monica! you have great taste" and made all these crazy noises. I may of screwed up here, because I played the playful insecure card, so i would say " aww you ladies need to stop looking at my nipples! you make me feel insecure ". I couldn't help but play on the safe side and try not to come off ass "too ****y".
After I get painted, I tell Monica how warm it is inside the portable, and since it was a nice windy afternoon outside, i told her to come with me, which she did. At first there were many people around, so i didn't really kiss her or anything, but eventually it was just me and her. It took me a few seconds to realize it was a moment i had always been waiting for. so here i am standing infront of monica making eye contact with her. i could read her eyes saying " what are you doing stupid? KISS ME!" and it took me a moment before I did. We started to make out, but her phone went off, and it was her friend Sam who was in a cyrsis with a relationship. she starts talking to sam, so i tell her "i'll be back" as i go into the portable instead of waiting for her to finish talking to Sam. I get inside, drink a bit, eat a little, and talk to the coach for a bit.

The actual football game
To cut some it short, we head to the game, in Marissa's car, which is a 4 door honda civic. I sit next to Monica, as she sits next to another girl. As I sit next to her, I hold her hand. Blah blah, SHE takes MY hand and places it around her, so i guess that's a sign. As my right arm is around her, I take my free hand and hold her left hand. Next thing i knew, we were making out, and it was pretty hot. I actually got really turned on by this, and started to "pre ***" my pants because it was that good. We were making out for about 10 seconds, but i think i pulled away because.... I just had no idea where to go.

In all honesty, we kissed a bunch of times during the game. We made out a handful of times as well. The thing I noticed is that most of the time, she INITIATED it. As in, she would sit inbetween my legs, and she would lean back, and bend her neck so her face would look up at mine and then we would kiss. Or during the game, she would turn around and kiss me ( because of the order of the painting of " C O U G A R S ", she stood infront of me, and i was standing behind her) I probably only initiated 2-3 times out of the dozen plus times we kissed/ made out. one of them was pretty bad, because i totally missed her lips and i felt pretty embarassed by it actually lol.

During the game too, her friends would occasionally leave and come back from the concession stand to get food/drinks/ whatever. they would invite Monica, and she would leave without telling me where she was going, or even a goodbye, which didn't really phase me but i did notice it. While she was gone, I wandered to my other friends, and went with them to walk around. She ends up calling me to, trying to find out where i am. Her exact words are " where did you go?" on the phone. Is this an IOI? or a sign that she is pretty controlling, since she wants to know where i am exactly.

Who has the biggest balls?
During the game, we had some nice kino going on I would stand behind her and hug her from behind, and all her chick friends would go " aww thats so sweet!" and we started to kiss in front of them. a lot of my friends saw me and Monica together for the first time, so they got the picture as well. When the other school's marching band played, everyone in the stands ( including myself, monica, and the whole volleyball team ) turned around to turn away from them. This ment monica was behind me, and she would playfully poke me and touch my butt. I playfully responded " not in public!" and she replied with a " oh please! I make the rules duy! ". I noticed that when we would walk, she would pretty much demand me holding her hands, which i don't like. I mean, i love holding her hands, but I hate the fact that she seems to DEMAND it. I place my hand around her hips/ waist and that works well for a bit, but eventually SHE breaks it off, and tries to hold my hand. Sometimes when she says" duy hold my hand" I look at her and say " that's not how you ask" and she replies " okay, PLEASE hold my hand!" and I do. While we were walking together, she also playfully said " Duy, I wear the pants in this relationship " and i couldn't think of anything to say or counter it besides " actually, incase you didn't notice, im the only one wearing pants. you're wearing short shorts".
more specifically, how can I counter these "power" control moves without comming off as b1tchy or whiny?

When we drove back home, the car was stuffed with one too many people, so Monica sat on my lap. It was very nice and i had my hand on her legs, and my arm around her shoulder. I layed my head against her shoulder/ chest and i started to think " Am i being girly by doing this? Isn't the girl suppose to lay her head in the guy's body?" Besides that, I tried to make sure my hands didn't stay "Dead" on her so i would randomly stroke her body/ play with her fingers every now and then.

Building Rapport
So I noticed that I tend to bust on her a little. I call her clumsy because she can't seem to walk straight, I make fun of the fact that she watches the disney channel and Lizzy miguire and all that stuff. I didn't want to seem to agree with her on everything, but I want to connect with her on a certain level, to build comfort and trust. I was thinking, how could I connect with her on being a " child" at heart? For example, if you met a girl who was did ballet for 10 years, you could talk to her about how " it's easy at first, but it takes great dedication and responsibility to keep it going... blah blah blah."
how could you "connect" with kinda being a child? innocents? freedom?

In Conclusion
It was a pretty good night. lots of kissing and fun. I think im SLOWLY getting better at kissing because sometimes when i get lost, I just slow EVERYTHING down. I suck her lips slowly, I play with her tongue slowly, and i bring my hand up to her face, for some hair stroking or cheek stroking.

What do you guys think of this kino? heres the situation. She has some nacho cheese, and shes eaten all the nachos, leaving only the cheese left, which she claims is the best part. She is eating them with her finger, and i tell her " i love cheese!" she offers me some, but instead I take her finger that has some cheese on it, put it in my mouth and "suck" it off. Would you say thats good kino, or am i a little "gay" for doing this? I ask this because its something that if a girl did to me, it would drive me wild, but if a guy does it to a girl, is it the same?

EDIT: oh shes comming over tomorrow at 12 PM to meet my family.

 

[BongDuy]

I hope you mean 9 pm...never text a girl as early as 9 am cuz theyre all asleep and will get mad if u wake them up. Why would u text her that early to hang out later that night. It'll make you come off as needy cuz shes prolly just woken up and ur already talkin to her bout tonite. Lay off her a bit and text her later in the day if u wanna hang at nite

well you have a major point right there, and typically i wouldn't even consider ever messaging or calling anyone this early, but Monica is an early sleeper. She sleeps on schoolnights at 8:00 PM haha. she can't stay up past 11 without getting knocked out.

You need to "sum up courage" just to put your arm on her sholder? Im sorry but thats pretty pathetic...have more balls than that.

I completely agree. It's just I had never had a girl lay next to me like that. I had no clue what to do, all i knew was I didn't want to act like my old self and do NOTHING. I didn't want to come off as weird by just leaving my hand dead on her arm while she layed next to me.

Just for the record, if a girl decides to lay down like that on that couch, its usually a sign that she wants you to lay down right next to her and cuddle with her. Think of how awkward and weird it looks if the girl is laying down and ur just sitting up. In that situation I wouldve laid down right next to her, gotten really close to her, and REALLY amped up the kino to a very sexual level.

I've never cuddled with a girl before so i guess i didn't see this comming. thinking about it now though, i still would feel weird trying to "wiggle" behind her to cuddle with her. The way she laid, her back was against the seat of the couch. maybe I should lay infront of her and let her hold me? haha if that isn't homo or anything. How would a guy initiate "cuddling" anyways? i've never really thought about it.

1. Put your right hand on her very lower back/ass
2. With your right hand, pull her right in very close to your body
3. Take your left hand, put it on her cheek/neck/in hair
4. Fvcking make out with her and stick your fvcking tongue right in there and keep on making out with her until she pulls away
5. This will fvcking turn her on soooo much you have no idea. I SWEAR TO YOU it will increase your sexual level with her so much more, and will get her so fvckin horny she wont know how to control herself. You'l score major points if you do this, TRUST ME

This is golden! it works quite often actually. thanks eaglez

 

[BongDuy]

November 7 2009

So today was the day Monica was suppose to meet my family. At first I wasn't nervous, but when she arrived and we sat around the dinner table, i soon realized my body wasn't ready for the situation. Things started off slow when she got there, It was me, Monica, my mom, my 3 year old niece, and my dad sitting around this small round table. We ate rice, steak, and some veggies with chopsticks, so you can imagine how weird it was for her. I teased her about "practicing" but it turns out i needed more practice with them because my mom was telling me what to do in Vietnamese. I have a lot to learn about being a host because I was totally lost. Monica would decline any water, but my mom told me in Vietnamese to get her some anyways, so I did. She ended up drinking all of it. My mom told me to help cut her steak for her, so i did. unfortunately, at the first snip of the steak, the piece of meat went flying onto Monica's shirt, and falling into her lap. I was soo embarassed, and i felt bad for her haha. Another embarassing moment was when I asked Monica if she wanted some veggies from the plate. I took chopsticks and tried to pick up some lettuce, but i ended up spilling quite a bit, making a big mess. I was also embarassed, but i was nervous because Monica was nervous. It just happend. Long story short, she helps out and scores some major bonus points with my family for helping me clean up. My mom describes her as a "nice big girl" and when i asked her about the "big" part she said " after her 1st kid, shes going to get huge" and i kinda laughed about that. Of course, my mom didn't say that until Monica left.

Anyways, I think im getting better at conversation because while we ate, i started to slowly build up the momentum for everyone to get talking. This was very unusual of me, because When im with my family, especially when we eat, im normally the quitest one because my family is usually complaining about some drama in their lives, so i just try to ignore it. plus i dont understand half of the things they complain about.

During the time we ate, She mentions how Her sister Samatha wants to go see " The forth kind" and she asks " you want to come?" I reply " ill see. What time will you guys go?" and she replies " well first of all, i have to see whether or not Samatha really wants to see it because shes chicken, but i'll call you if we decide to go." Sounds like a date in my book

The Park
While we are around the table, I think its best that we get out of the house and away from my parents. I suggested we go to the park to watch the little league play, and she loves the idea. after we ate we head to the park and once again, im schooled in some basic Social lessons, like walking on the curb when we're walking on the road. We hold hands, get to the park and just talk a bit. fluff fluff, I tell her follow me and go on the swing set so she can push me. During this time I have yet to kiss her, and im trying to find a good time to do so. I feel like kissing a girl while walking is very difficult if she's looking straight, and not looking towards you. But eventually I suggest a funny comedian ( Russel Peters) and we end up heading back to my house. While we are walking, I hold her by the waist, and she immediately replies " not infront of the little kids!" I end up saying " oh well thats fine." She holds her hands out and without saying anything, I knew she wanted me to hold her hand. Instead, I don't and i playfully say " I have the pants. I'll hold your hand when I want" and she goes "whateverrr..." and crosses her arms as we walk side to side awkwardly without holding hands.

Eventually, she caves in and goes " PLEASE hold my hand!" I looked at her and playfully said " You have to earn it." I guess she didn't get what i was trying to do because she was standing there, silently without saying much else. After a few seconds of this silence, I look at her and say " use your imagination." She turns to me and we kiss. First kiss of the day, out of the way.

We head back to my room, as I tell her to sit down on my bed, while im flipping through my computer in my chair. We watch russel peters, and i guess shes a little uncomfortable because shes sitting at the edge. I sit next to her and place my arm around her, but then i realize how uncomfortable it is. I sit back against the wall, and she soon follows so my arm is now around her.

Makeout Sessions
So while me and Monica are in my room, we made out several times. If theres anything I feel i've learned is that going for the ear is not the best move. haha and im not sure if sucking on a girl's neck is that great, even though i didnt face any resistance at all when i did it. Infact, she opened up her neck for me when she realized what i was trying to do. I also try and keep my hands from "dying", so i move them around, slowly, caress her and touching her. After each makeout session, we had a "cuddle" session too, and i usually had my hand on her legs, and i was stroking her thighs. I should of tried to stroke her vagina, but i just didnt think of it at the time.

The setting was, me and her, alone in my room. The windows are up to allow light to get in, as Russel peters is making jokes on my computer screen across from us.

Attempt 1.
This was the first time I had ever made out with a girl this long. It was so amazingly hot. I'm not sure how i initiated it, i think my arm was around her, and my free hand was running along her legs as she layed to my right. Im pretty sure I just went for it, and we started to get hot and steamy for like 2 minutes.
I break it off and we continue to watch russel peters. Im not sure if shes diggin the comedian because her laughs are slight chuckles, so after about 5 minutes of just trying to figure out whether or not shes into Peters, I get up and say " these curtains are causing a glare." I pull them down and, when i turn around she is still laying there.

Attempt 2
I decide to mount her, with my legs spread around her waist. bam, make out session 2. im ontop of her, stroking her hair and just kissing her lips slowly, and i try to be "passionate" because im really loving ever second. my hands are running around her body. I didn't directly grab her breasts, but i did stroke along side of them as I was running my hands from her sides to her hair and back. Eventually, I sit up, while im still mounted ontop of her. I sit there, and ponder myself should I take a huge risk and try and get more sexual. I look at her hips and back into her eyes. I sit there for a few seconds, and Monica sits up with me still ontop, and kisses me again. I kiss her and whisper to her ears " take your pants off. I want to go down on you." in a sexual confident tone.
her exact words are "no duy" with a confident smile, as if she was in control. I kiss her again, and say " that's fine" as i make my way off of her, and we go back into a slight "cuddle" position. At first im a little disappointed but then I started to totally understand why she didn't want me to go down on her, and plus I like to live by the motto " Anything worth having doesn't come easy." So it just makes me want her a bit more. All was not lost because there was still a lot of kino. I was within her arms, and she played with my hair a bit. I whispered in my ears " I love it when you do that." and she kept doing it the whole time we were in that position.

EDIT: Did I screw up by cuddling with her after she said no? Im thinking about what I learned in Psychology and basically, Im "rewarding" (Cuddling with her after she said no) her for an inappropriate reaction to me ( Rejection of escalation )
Should I have cut off all physical contact with her, and closed off any positive body language?

Attempt 3
I decide to let things cool down for a bit, maybe not the best idea. We sit there for probably 30 minutes and watch the rest of Russel Peter's stand up. As it ends, I sit up and ask " what type of music do you like?" She replies "everything." I shuffle through my itunes, looking for some music. Then I look at her and say " fvck it, we don't need music" and I go in for a third make out session. Again, I mount her with my legs around her waist. i once against sit up but this time i say " come here ". When she sits up, i hold her hands, and I fall back, letting her get ontop of me. She doesn't fully mount me, but she is now kissing me from the top. I find it extremely awesome in every way and go with it. What i didn't realize is that this gives her a lot of control, because before I know it, she says to me " We should stop." My first words were " Why?" in a calm, curious tone. She doesn't answer and I think about What mystery says when you face Last minute resistance and how its best to just "agree" with it, ignore what she says, and to keep escalating, so i add " you know what? you're right" and I continue to try and kiss her but because she was ontop, she pulled away before i could place my hand around her cheek for more sexy time.

The goodbye
so after all that making out, I sit up and we're shuffling through my Itunes library on my computer. I signal her to come sit on my lap, and as she does, she puts her arm around me and clicks around my songs. We exchange some light kisses, nothing to heavy and its all playful as we talk about my music and who is "cool" for listening to what. Her sister calls Monica and tells her that she would come by and pick her up, so Monica says goodbye to my family and we wait outside on the edge of my pick up truck. We just talk and enjoy each others company. When her sister arrives, I notice that they are back from fishing and that her brother is also with them. I greet them all, and kiss monica Goodbye. Sounds like today was a pretty good day, even though it could of been AMAZIN if you know what i mean

 

[eaglez1177]

Time to digest

11.05.09

Practice makes perfect
It's actually the total opposite of me, and i kinda don't like considering any girl as an "object", but if it will help me stay in control and focused, It'll probably do more good than harm. Do whatever you may need to not make her ur one itis

nothing but Sex
I also support the fact that our relationship is based on physical appearance because we don't seem to connect well on the mental level. I'm not sure if its because we don't really spend enough alone time getting to know each other or anything, but it seems like we aren't very similar people. our humor is different, our music taste is different, and even our friends kinda vary, although we share a common few. When im with her, we just bs talk a lot.Honestly, when ur in a relationship like that, chances are it wont go on for that long. Hate to break it to ya but thats just how it is; so use ur time wisely and try to make this a very sexual relationship Lately I haven't had much alone time with her at all. Infact, I only see her when i walk her to the hallways. I want to hang out with her outside of school, but i just feel like there are so many things affecting us.
1) I don't want to seem desperate and have that much spare time to spend with her.
2) Are her parents home? Is her sister home? Her brother? I feel like this'll effect me somehow. Maybe im over thinking.
3) What will we do together? She tells me all she does at home is " Homework and watch TV". I don't want to come over to watch her TV in her living room all day. Do people usually hang out on the weekdays, as in going out at night or something? Again, maybe im making this that much harder than it has to be.Most kids on highschool dont really go out on the weekends. It all depends on the person tho; if Monica is very dedicated to school, she prolly wont go out on school nights; if shes a partier and loves to have fun, she'll prolly will go out on school nights

An unexpected Phobia?
I think I found out why I have such a big problem making out/ escalating with Monica. It seems to be a sticking point because, honestly, this is the first girl i've ever gotten this far with. I've kissed Monica more times than I can even count, I average about 6 a day ( not to brag of course). but thats not the problem. The problem is IM SCARED of SUCESS!! yeah you heard me! "you're out of your mind! you're crazy about success?! HOW!" you ask. I feel like if I do success, i dont know where to go. Like ive said before, i've never been this far with a girl. I feel lost and unexperience, I fear the unknown. Of course the only way to get over this fear is just to keep pushing and trial and error.Exactly I just thought it'd be an interesting note to post, because i never knew there was such a thing, which may explain why sometimes I may pull away first when we kiss, because Im scared of escalating.Dont be scared man. If this is how you feel, then you have a bigtime confidence issue. The reason why your fearful of escalating/suceeding/the unknown is because you dont have enough confidence. Simple as that. Since you kiss monica so many times, that sure develop a comfort level, build ur confidence and make you WANT to escalate

A little too much of anything can be bad, right?
So I noticed yesterday when I was with my cousin at their house, my uncle approached me and started talking to me about joining the Navy and doing all this crazy stuff. I of course, Just sat there, keeping a strong confident eye contact level, nodding to him talking, and just trying to be socially polite. I noticed that I found myself internaly disagreeing with him, but because I didn't want to talk to him, I wanted to just nod him away by agreeing with everything he said so he would get it out of his system, get bored of me, and walk away. I also noticed I was smiling at him. Smiling. Nodding. and then it hit me. Is there such thing as smiling too much?? nopeI mean, is it good to fake smiles like that? If you can fake it well somewhat, then yes, if ur terrible(and i mean like really really bad) at faking, then no.sometimes in school i find myself as labeled as the guy who "laughs at any joke", so maybe that is making my laughs less genuine.Dont be labeled that guy. My teacher also calls me optimistic, but thats probably because I aways answer things with a
" well we didn't come in last place."
"It wasn't good", "but it wasn't bad either."
Or " It could of been much worse"

The dangerous "L" word
What are some ways to replace "love" for now? I don't want to be the first to say it, especially this early. So far i've come up with ..............
" I adore you ""I really like you" Still though, you should NOT go all "lovey dovey" with monica saying all this stuff every second about how much you like her. If you say it alot, it wont mean anythin, and will come off as afc. If you say it rarely, it will mean alot more, and have a much better effect. And of course, you should NEVER EVER tell any girl in HS that you love her. Thats ridiculous.

3) Ap Government - because of the way our two classes are set up, we're side by side with a door connecting us two. I can walk through her class, see her, and get to my class, but i usually don't. After class, I walk her to her spanish class. This is typically where most of my reports come from. This is also the last time I see her, unless I want to really go out of my way to see her, which I don't really do.good

We always kiss when we greet each other, and when we say goodbye. its becomming pretty routine, but because I want to keep things interesting, I may switch it up. We also typically hold hands, but I also want to change that up because Variety never hurt anyone.very good
I have a total of 7 classes, but because I dont see her after 3rd, I won't bother listing them.

Anyways, now to my day.
after 1st hour, I walked her to class. Nothing really interesting happen here, but I had one of my school spirit wrist bands on, and I remembered how i accidently sprayed it with my cologne. I thought it would be a good idea to give it to Monica, to leave my "Scent" around her, so she would think about me a bit more. She wore a jacket though, so i don't think she got a good whiff of it at all. dont over do the cologne

Saw her after my 3rd period, and we walked together, hand in hand. for the first time in the relationship, i broke the hand hold once or twice. I noticed that when I did, I caught a glare of her hand a few seconds after i broke contact. She had her hand by her side, as if she wanted me to grab it again, like she felt weird without me holding her. I take that as a good sign.so what if she gave you a look. your the boss, not her.

As we walked downstairs, I saw a friend of mine named Shelby. She's not really important, but she's Monica's good friend, because they're both on the softball team. A while back, Shelby told me that she was jealous because when Im with Monica, She never gets a hug from her. So when Monica raced to hug shelby. I playfully told monica the whole situtation, and told her playfully that i was "dissappointed in her" ( if it sounds weird, take it as an inside joke), as i broke off hand contact and continued walking her to class.she told me to hold her hand, but instead, i put my arm around her shoulder. When I did, she said she didn't really enjoy it and kinda shrugged it off. oddly enough, after we walked a few steps, she said " okay i was joking, you can put your arm back". Of course, I didn't, I think i just looked at her and continued walking without any contact with her. I continued walking her to class, as we entered her hallway.

* This hallway is a little special. after a few meters, there is a corridor area out of sight to the right, that leads to the nurse's office. This area is kinda hidden and more private than the hallway itself. *

As we approached this little corridor, I grabbed Monica's hand and pulled her in with me, as we stood there together, hidden from plain sight. I immediately kissed her and began attemping to make out with her. I raised my hand to stroke her hair but as soon as it made contact with her, Monica and I are interrupted by a Lady attempting to get into the nurse's office. Talk about c0ckblocking....so wat dude. shes ur freakin gf, you can do whatever you want. Dont stop unless a teacher tells you to stop
The moment is ruined and before I know it, we continue to walk down the hallway, towards her class. I see another corner, that isn't as "hidden" as the special corridor before, but I figure its better than nothing. I give it a shot, and she holds back and we make eye contact as she says the words " no duy." We look into each others eyes for a few more seconds, and she says to me " alright, ill cya later". She wraps her arms around me and we slowly begin to get closer, and closer. I hold back and say " not in public". Once she heard what I had said she replied " oh cmon duy....Fine." probably a little frustrated, but also in a light tone. I turn around and begin to walk away. Suddenly I feel a grip on my forearm, pulling me back. It's monica. I turn around and we meet each other by the lips for a kiss. Not a make out session, just a kiss.
As I walked away i thought to myself... " Did i screw up? "No. She denied you, so you gave her a taste of her own medicine by holding back from her hug and saying not in public. Good job there.

 

[eaglez1177]

time to digest again

11.06.09 I GOT MY INTERNET BACK!!!!

Painting
So when we get to school, we go into the portables, where the coach's room is. I enter and im the only guy there, and at first i wasn't really noticed. The coach was busy painting some girl's face for the game and everyone else was getting a letter to spell out " C O U G A R S" on their stomachs. I see Monica laying on a table, letting her stomach dry out from the paint and as i get closer, we hold hands and i kiss her while shes laying down. Suddenly the room's attention turns to me, as everyone goes "aww!" or "it's monica's boyfriend!"
long story short, I got my stomach painted with a Paw print, and when I took my shirt off, all the girls went " oh monica! you have great taste"haha nice, chicks love abs dude, work on em as much as possible and made all these crazy noises. I may of screwed up here, because I played the playful insecure card, so i would say " aww you ladies need to stop looking at my nipples! you make me feel insecure ". I couldn't help but play on the safe side and try not to come off ass "too ****y".play on the safe side? lol its kinda hard to come off as "too ****y" I would not have said that to the girls i wouldve said "well I do have abs of steel..."
After I get painted, I tell Monica how warm it is inside the portable, and since it was a nice windy afternoon outside, i told her to come with me, which she did. At first there were many people around, so i didn't really kiss her or anything, but eventually it was just me and her. It took me a few seconds to realize it was a moment i had always been waiting for. so here i am standing infront of monica making eye contact with her. i could read her eyes saying " what are you doing stupid? KISS ME!" and it took me a moment before I did. We started to make out, but her phone went off, and it was her friend Sam who was in a cyrsis with a relationship. she starts talking to sam, so i tell her "i'll be back" as i go into the portable instead of waiting for her to finish talking to Sam.good job I get inside, drink a bit, eat a little, and talk to the coach for a bit.

The actual football game
To cut some it short, we head to the game, in Marissa's car, which is a 4 door honda civic. I sit next to Monica, as she sits next to another girl. As I sit next to her, I hold her hand. Blah blah, SHE takes MY hand and places it around her, so i guess that's a sign. As my right arm is around her, I take my free hand and hold her left hand. Next thing i knew, we were making out, and it was pretty hot. I actually got really turned on by this, and started to "pre ***" my pants because it was that good. We were making out for about 10 seconds, but i think i pulled away because.... I just had no idea where to go.no idea where to go? just keep makin out dude lol

In all honesty, we kissed a bunch of times during the game. We made out a handful of times as well. The thing I noticed is that most of the time, she INITIATED it. As in, she would sit inbetween my legs, and she would lean back, and bend her neck so her face would look up at mine and then we would kiss. Or during the game, she would turn around and kiss me ( because of the order of the painting of " C O U G A R S ", she stood infront of me, and i was standing behind her) I probably only initiated 2-3 times out of the dozen plus times we kissed/ made out. one of them was pretty bad, because i totally missed her lips and i felt pretty embarassed by it actually lol.lol so what

During the game too, her friends would occasionally leave and come back from the concession stand to get food/drinks/ whatever. they would invite Monica, and she would leave without telling me where she was going, or even a goodbye, which didn't really phase me but i did notice it.do not let that affect you at all While she was gone, I wandered to my other friends, and went with them to walk around. She ends up calling me to, trying to find out where i am. Her exact words are " where did you go?" on the phone. Is this an IOI? or a sign that she is pretty controlling, since she wants to know where i am exactly.Nah she just wants to be around you thats all. If she constantly asked you where you were like every day all the time then that wud be controlling

Who has the biggest balls?
During the game, we had some nice kino going on I would stand behind her and hug her from behind, and all her chick friends would go " aww thats so sweet!" and we started to kiss in front of them. a lot of my friends saw me and Monica together for the first time, so they got the picture as well. When the other school's marching band played, everyone in the stands ( including myself, monica, and the whole volleyball team ) turned around to turn away from them. This ment monica was behind me, and she would playfully poke me and touch my butt. I playfully responded " not in public!" and she replied with a " oh please! I make the rules duy! "she makes the rules!? NOOOOO. That is baddd. YOU make the rules. NOT her.. I noticed that when we would walk, she would pretty much demand me holding her hands, which i don't like.if you dont like it, then DO NOT go along with it. DENY her. I mean, i love holding her hands, but I hate the fact that she seems to DEMAND it. I place my hand around her hips/ waist and that works well for a bit, but eventually SHE breaks it off, and tries to hold my hand. Sometimes when she says" duy hold my hand" I look at her and say " that's not how you ask" and she replies " okay, PLEASE hold my hand!" and I do. While we were walking together, she also playfully said " Duy, I wear the pants in this relationship "wow. This is not good at all man. Wow. You CANNOT let things be like this. and i couldn't think of anything to say or counter it besides " actually, incase you didn't notice, im the only one wearing pants. you're wearing short shorts".
more specifically, how can I counter these "power" control moves without comming off as b1tchy or whiny? You just have to come back with a bigger power move of your own. Reply back to her as if her comment doesnt phase you, and remind her that your the one in charge. You dont have to do this directly, you can do it indirectly to by just telling her to do something with you or demanding she does something. Make yourself in charge. DO NOT let her control things.

When we drove back home, the car was stuffed with one too many people, so Monica sat on my lap. It was very nice and i had my hand on her legs, and my arm around her shoulder. I layed my head against her shoulder/ chest and i started to think " Am i being girly by doing this? Isn't the girl suppose to lay her head in the guy's body?" Besides that, I tried to make sure my hands didn't stay "Dead" on her so i would randomly stroke her body/ play with her fingers every now and then.

Building Rapport
So I noticed that I tend to bust on her a little. I call her clumsy because she can't seem to walk straight, I make fun of the fact that she watches the disney channel and Lizzy miguire and all that stuff. I didn't want to seem to agree with her on everything, but I want to connect with her on a certain level, to build comfort and trust. I was thinking, how could I connect with her on being a " child" at heart? For example, if you met a girl who was did ballet for 10 years, you could talk to her about how " it's easy at first, but it takes great dedication and responsibility to keep it going... blah blah blah."
how could you "connect" with kinda being a child? innocents? freedom?NO idea...im gonna say the only way you can connect is to go down to that level and act immature

In Conclusion
It was a pretty good night. lots of kissing and fun. I think im SLOWLY getting better at kissing because sometimes when i get lost, I just slow EVERYTHING down. I suck her lips slowly, I play with her tongue slowly, and i bring my hand up to her face, for some hair stroking or cheek stroking. excellent. Trust me, girls LOVE slow and soft kissers. You dont wanna be that kind of kisser that shoves ur tongue down her throat and goes crazy

What do you guys think of this kino? heres the situation. She has some nacho cheese, and shes eaten all the nachos, leaving only the cheese left, which she claims is the best part. She is eating them with her finger, and i tell her " i love cheese!" she offers me some, but instead I take her finger that has some cheese on it, put it in my mouth and "suck" it off. Would you say thats good kino, or am i a little "gay" for doing this? I ask this because its something that if a girl did to me, it would drive me wild, but if a guy does it to a girl, is it the same?Lol that is pretty gay man. Think of it: your sucking cheese off a girls finger. That doesnt sound a little homo to you lol?

EDIT: oh shes comming over tomorrow at 12 PM to meet my family.

 

[eaglez1177]

phew finally done lol

November 7 2009


The Park
While we are around the table, I think its best that we get out of the house and away from my parents. I suggested we go to the park to watch the little league play, and she loves the idea. after we ate we head to the park and once again, im schooled in some basic Social lessons, like walking on the curb when we're walking on the road. We hold hands, get to the park and just talk a bit. fluff fluff, I tell her follow me and go on the swing set so she can push me. During this time I have yet to kiss her, and im trying to find a good time to do so. I feel like kissing a girl while walking is very difficult if she's looking straight, and not looking towards you. But eventually I suggest a funny comedian ( Russel Peters) and we end up heading back to my house. While we are walking, I hold her by the waist, and she immediately replies " not infront of the little kids!" I end up saying " oh well thats fine." She holds her hands out and without saying anything, I knew she wanted me to hold her hand. Instead, I don't and i playfully say " I have the pants. I'll hold your hand when I want" and she goes "whateverrr..." and crosses her arms as we walk side to side awkwardly without holding hands.

Eventually, she caves in and goes " PLEASE hold my hand!" I looked at her and playfully said " You have to earn it." I guess she didn't get what i was trying to do because she was standing there, silently without saying much else. After a few seconds of this silence, I look at her and say " use your imagination." She turns to me and we kiss. First kiss of the day, out of the way.great job here. I love how you were in charge. THIS is what you need more of

Makeout Sessions
So while me and Monica are in my room, we made out several times. If theres anything I feel i've learned is that going for the ear is not the best move.yea only some girls are into that kinky stuff lol haha and im not sure if sucking on a girl's neck is that great, even though i didnt face any resistance at all when i did it. Infact, she opened up her neck for me when she realized what i was trying to do. Are u kidding me? Girls LOVEEEE being kissed on the neck. It drives them insane, and gets them extremely horny. Trust me dude you can score bigtime horny points here by using your tongue and kissing her neck. She will get really turned on.I also try and keep my hands from "dying", so i move them around, slowly, caress her and touching her.

Attempt 1.
This was the first time I had ever made out with a girl this long. It was so amazingly hot. I'm not sure how i initiated it, i think my arm was around her, and my free hand was running along her legs as she layed to my right. Im pretty sure I just went for it, and we started to get hot and steamy for like 2 minutes.
I break it off and we continue to watch russel peters. Im not sure if shes diggin the comedian because her laughs are slight chuckles, so after about 5 minutes of just trying to figure out whether or not shes into Peters, I get up and say " these curtains are causing a glare." I pull them down and, when i turn around she is still laying there.

Attempt 2
I decide to mount her, with my legs spread around her waist.i personally think mounting a girl to kiss her is kinda weird. she should be the one on top; girls shud always be on top cuz they're the one with the vag. You dont have sex with a girl while riding on top of her; she has to be on top of you. Plus, if shes on top you can rub ur junk around her vag and stuff. You can lay on top of her, and maybe prop yourself up a little with your arms, but riding on top of her is kinda weird. bam, make out session 2. im ontop of her, stroking her hair and just kissing her lips slowly, and i try to be "passionate" because im really loving ever second. my hands are running around her body. I didn't directly grab her breasts, but i did stroke along side of them as I was running my hands from her sides to her hair and back. Eventually, I sit up, while im still mounted ontop of her. I sit there, and ponder myself should I take a huge risk and try and get more sexual. I look at her hips and back into her eyes. I sit there for a few seconds, and Monica sits up with me still ontop, and kisses me again. I kiss her and whisper to her ears " take your pants off. I want to go down on you." in a sexual confident tone.Ehh thats a little too direct. If you wanna advance, you cant just "skip a couple steps of the ladder" and say something so direct and forward. And for the record, you should finger a girl before you eat her out; thats usually wat comes first cuz its a step below eating a girl out. what you shouldve done is while kissing her, you shouldve start to rub her down there on the outside of her clothes. Then, eventually you should go underneath her pants and finger her.
her exact words are "no duy" with a confident smile, as if she was in control. I kiss her again, and say " that's fine" as i make my way off of her, and we go back into a slight "cuddle" position. At first im a little disappointed but then I started to totally understand why she didn't want me to go down on her, and plus I like to live by the motto " Anything worth having doesn't come easy." So it just makes me want her a bit more. All was not lost because there was still a lot of kino. I was within her arms, and she played with my hair a bit. I whispered in my ears " I love it when you do that." and she kept doing it the whole time we were in that position.You did a great job responding to the rejection. You didnt let it affect you, and simple said "thats fine". Good job.

EDIT: Did I screw up by cuddling with her after she said no?NOPE Im thinking about what I learned in Psychology and basically, Im "rewarding" (Cuddling with her after she said no) her for an inappropriate reaction to me ( Rejection of escalation )thats overthinkin it lol
Should I have cut off all physical contact with her, and closed off any positive body language? Noooooo. That means her rejection affected you! Thats the last thing you wanna do! Make it seem like it didnt phase you at all. Its like any other rejection; your supposed to just ignore it and keep going on. Dont let it bring u down.

Attempt 3
I decide to let things cool down for a bit, maybe not the best idea.Nuttin wrong wit that We sit there for probably 30 minutes and watch the rest of Russel Peter's stand up. As it ends, I sit up and ask " what type of music do you like?" She replies "everything." I shuffle through my itunes, looking for some music. Then I look at her and say " fvck it, we don't need music" and I go in for a third make out session. Again, I mount her with my legs around her waist. i once against sit up but this time i say " come here ". When she sits up, i hold her hands, and I fall back, letting her get ontop of me. She doesn't fully mount me, but she is now kissing me from the top. I find it extremely awesome in every way and go with it. What i didn't realize is that this gives her a lot of control, because before I know it, she says to me " We should stop." My first words were " Why?" in a calm, curious tone. She doesn't answer and I think about What mystery says when you face Last minute resistance and how its best to just "agree" with it, ignore what she says, and to keep escalating, so i add " you know what? you're right" and I continue to try and kiss her but because she was ontop, she pulled away before i could place my hand around her cheek for more sexy time.You shouldve just said okay in the first place. Despite this, i still wouldve tried to kiss her. If she gives you lmr, you shud def try again and see what happens. nuttin wrong with that. Or, you can get her goin by kissin her neck, or do whatever u gotta do to get her horny again

The goodbye
so after all that making out, I sit up and we're shuffling through my Itunes library on my computer. I signal her to come sit on my lap, and as she does, she puts her arm around me and clicks around my songs. We exchange some light kisses, nothing to heavy and its all playful as we talk about my music and who is "cool" for listening to what. Her sister calls Monica and tells her that she would come by and pick her up, so Monica says goodbye to my family and we wait outside on the edge of my pick up truck. We just talk and enjoy each others company. When her sister arrives, I notice that they are back from fishing and that her brother is also with them. I greet them all, and kiss monica Goodbye. Sounds like today was a pretty good day, even though it could of been AMAZIN if you know what i mean