I don't know whether to laugh or cry.....

[STR8UP]

Yo Str8up,


I may be wrong, because there's no way I can prove it, BUT I suspect that as of late, you have settled quite comfortably into the habit of ignoring threads that offer a different viewpoint than your own. AND...I also suspect that you may even be ignoring posts within YOUR OWN threads that do not commiserate with the views that you are currently holding. And I don't mean just my posts in particular, but MANY posts by MANY different guys on here who have a genuine interest in seeing you overcome the things that are dragging you down.

VU-

You post some good stuff, but to be perfectly honest due to your writing style I'm a little too ADD to read through them a lot of the time. I'm not ignoring anything though.

I consider you one of our MOST openminded posters here----that's why I find it somewhat disappointing to see you so quickly choose to walk in the way of the "closeminded"-----when it comes to at least considering trying some of the different things people have been suggesting.

The problem is that most people here think it's all about who I hang out with, and that I need to find new friends, but I can assure you that the people I spend the most time with are as normal as normal is. Getting new friends WILL NOT change a thing. So yea, I DO reject that advice.

And if indeed that is your mindset, I wonder what it is that you want from us? Is this current post of yours an invitation for conversation for others to offer their opinions? Or is this only a rant, and you could really care less what ANYBODY has to say on this particular matter? If you would just answer this question for us, then the majority of us would know better how to react or how NOT to react to what you have written.

This post was a rant, but I welcome feedback.

But what we DO have, and what we CAN offer each other is an alternate perspective, and perhaps, some suggestions as to ways that we can help each other elevate higher than our present circumstances.

But if people can't take my word for the fact that I'm not involved in some sort of dark underworld, they can't give accurate advice.

"DON'T LET THE BASTARDS GRIND YOU DOWN!"

...and feel free to substitute Bastards with Biiitches if you like. :yes:

My suggestion to you is to adopt this confrontational, war-like mindset towards ALL the things in your life that seek to rob you of your will to live ENTHUSIASTICALLY. And recognize that the mission of EVERY good soldier is to make sure that his ENEMIES (the events, things and/or circumstances in his life that seek to depress him, to hold him back, or to hold him down) "DIE" for their cause-------not the other way around.


Much peace and much respect to you.

This is excellent advice, but I'm sure you can understand that there will be times when things build up and get to you. That's where I'm at now. I don't have ANY spare time to waste, yet that's all women seem to do is waste my time. I don't have the time or the energy to slog through this swamp just to get to one piece of good fruit. I know that some people hold a different view of this subject than I do, but I think most of us agree that the majority of women are undateable for some reason or another, and I have just had the misfortune lately of running into all of the unqualified ones.

 

[iqqi]

How is that bitter?

Once again Gerard is right in his answer to this. You are bitter for taking it seriously. You don't hate and/or feel the urge to slap all the men on these boards for having the sentiment that men are superior to women... and its the same thing! Even you are guilty of it.

Just like YOU think it is so hard to find a quality girl, many WOMEN think the same thing of men. It is when you take such a fatalistic view of things that you set yourself up for failure and more failure on top of failure!

Then you describe women as princesses, or independent career women... aren't you kind of princessy... and an independent career man?

All a princess really is, is a woman with standards for how a man treats her. Sure, some take it too far. And that's fine, you don't have to deal with those types. But don't throw a fit and label someone just because they have standards and are used to being treated like a woman. Also, it really isn't that hard to make a princess come down from her pedestal. As long as your are OFFERING something real and substantial.

And an independent career woman is the opposite of a dependent AW loser chick... what's not to be attracted to? OF COURSE once again, some of these chicks take it too far... and once again, know it when you see it.

I also agree with Concordian that you are giving yourself way too much credit in the looks department, but of course you won't see it. I also think that not only are you not as hot as you think... but neither is the personality you present to "quality women".

These quality women see you, and snub you, so you think they are dumb b!tches, when the truth is probably that they are just what you think doesn't exist (the fabled quality woman), but they won't give you the time of day because of your package presentation.

Maybe you should come down to earth, or something.

 

[STR8UP]

You can't know what a woman is all about until you've known her a long time.

And that's a BIG part of the reason I am where I am today with regards to my attitude about women. I watch countless "stuff" happen behind other people's backs, and I think to myself that when I'm in a relationship my girlfriends were doing exactly the same thing. Not all of them, of course, but I can assure you that the stuff I found out about was only the tip of the iceberg.

Talking to my business partner today and he was telling me how he reconnected with his H/S sweetheart via Myspace. They became myspace "friends", and started talking, and I guess she had to delete him because her husband found out and wasn't too happy.

Then I'm talking on IM to this chick I know who is engaged. She just spent the past month in Europe with her new fiancee. We start talking about the possibility of her moving to my area to finish up school, and I tell her that it might not be a good idea for us to hang out so much if that happens. You know what she says? She said "You never know....I might be single again by that time" Wow, that engagement lasted a long time.

And this chick is absolutely in love with me. If she moves back around all I would have to do is say the word and she would be cooking me dinner every night and scrubbing my dirty underwear. And she's A GREAT girl. Very giving, very caring, very sweet. But here she is ENGAGED talking about sex with me and how she had to control herself when she slept in my bed for three nights a couple of months ago.

I just see the same thing play out time and time again in my life and in the lives of everyone else I know.

 

[aliasguy]

And that's a BIG part of the reason I am where I am today with regards to my attitude about women. I watch countless "stuff" happen behind other people's backs, and I think to myself that when I'm in a relationship my girlfriends were doing exactly the same thing. Not all of them, of course, but I can assure you that the stuff I found out about was only the tip of the iceberg.

Talking to my business partner today and he was telling me how he reconnected with his H/S sweetheart via Myspace. They became myspace "friends", and started talking, and I guess she had to delete him because her husband found out and wasn't too happy.

Then I'm talking on IM to this chick I know who is engaged. She just spent the past month in Europe with her new fiancee. We start talking about the possibility of her moving to my area to finish up school, and I tell her that it might not be a good idea for us to hang out so much if that happens. You know what she says? She said "You never know....I might be single again by that time" Wow, that engagement lasted a long time.

And this chick is absolutely in love with me. If she moves back around all I would have to do is say the word and she would be cooking me dinner every night and scrubbing my dirty underwear. And she's A GREAT girl. Very giving, very caring, very sweet. But here she is ENGAGED talking about sex with me and how she had to control herself when she slept in my bed for three nights a couple of months ago.

I just see the same thing play out time and time again in my life and in the lives of everyone else I know.

Dude----
Accept the world, and women, and men AS THEY ARE. It isn't HORRIBLE, it's just real.

Why all the angst over it? It's not that the world is against you, it just IS AS IT IS.

People are people. They aren't OUT to screw you, or some fiance, or anyone else. People just do what people do. Sometimes it hurts others. That's life.

Your friend with the fiance is no different. She knowns the score. Of COURSE she might be single later. She knows, and accepts. I don't condone her behavior if she is actually cheating, but this is how it is , man. People DO this stuff. She will NEVER be your little wifey type scrubbing your underwear IN THE LONG TERM.

You have to let go of your NEED. You want a different world than the one you are living in. Accept the REAL world. There may indeed be a woman out there who will fulfill your wants/needs. But like others here have written, she'll be a rare gem. You probably won't find her. But it's ok to look.

In the meantime, don't expect so much from people. It's messing you up.

 

[STR8UP]

Then you describe women as princesses, or independent career women... aren't you kind of princessy... and an independent career man?

I know my value, if that's what you mean. And I'm not gonna get into the whole thing about "independent career women" cause the point will be lost on you.

But don't throw a fit and label someone just because they have standards and are used to being treated like a woman.

So tell me, how is a woman supposed to be treated?

Same way a MAN is supposed to be treated, but in society we make a DISTINCTION that a woman should be treated a certain way, with no such provision for a man. Just another stone thrown at men who are defenseless to fight back in "polite" society.

Also, it really isn't that hard to make a princess come down from her pedestal. As long as your are OFFERING something real and substantial.

I have no desire to do such.

I also agree with Concordian that you are giving yourself way too much credit in the looks department, but of course you won't see it. I also think that not only are you not as hot as you think... but neither is the personality you present to "quality women".

I don't know where anyone picked up that I have an inflated opinion of my looks, but whatever. Personally I could care less whether or not YOU think I am attractive, for numerous reasons, but lets just say that based upon having had relationships/sex/intimate contact with numerous good looking women I think it's safe to conclude that most women would not conclude that I am ugly.

These quality women see you, and snub you, so you think they are dumb b!tches, when the truth is probably that they are just what you think doesn't exist (the fabled quality woman), but they won't give you the time of day because of your package presentation.

Maybe you should come down to earth, or something.

Again, where do you people get this from? When did I even HINT to being pissed about being snubbed by a woman? Go back and reread the OP or any other post I have made and tell me how you came to that conclusion.

 

[STR8UP]

I am going to respect Str8up, and bow respectfully out of this thread and any future thread he decides to post.

Thanks.

Wow, how do I deserve so much respect, lol

That's ok, cause as soon as this thread dies I'm outa here for awhile anyway.

 

[STR8UP]

The library, church, yoga, ice cream crowd has nearly the same amount of screwed-up stuff (cheating, manipulation, selfishness, etc.) as the party scene. But you can at least be more likely to EXPECT it from the party scene.

In the other group, "bad" behavior is SO much more hidden, and eventually even more disappointing, because it's underground, and sneakier. And, in my view, MORE damaging and hypocritical.

I'm glad SOME people realize this.

Lots of people are very good about covering up their dirt, but it's there.

It's the self righteous "good" people you gotta watch out for.

 

[iqqi]

So tell me, how is a woman supposed to be treated?

Same way a MAN is supposed to be treated, but in society we make a DISTINCTION that a woman should be treated a certain way, with no such provision for a man. Just another stone thrown at men who are defenseless to fight back in "polite" society.

I'll address the rest of your post if I have time later, however I will like to say here that YES believe it or not there are women who know How To Treat a Man, and have a lot of pride in knowing how, as well. But these aren't just any men they are talking about... and these aren't just any women themselves.

As a matter of fact, MOST women have some idea in their heads that they need to know how to treat men in order to get what they want. This "want" or "goal" varies... and might I even suggest that the women who you are dealing with know just how to treat you to get what they want... but once again that would allude to the idea that you are hanging with the wrong chicks. Key words here would be "attention" and "attention wh0res".

Sorry that was all rushed, but I gotta go...

 

[joekerr31]

good post swifty.

which then comes back to my point on the crowd str8up hangs with.

i want to grab this guy by the ear and drag him to a museum and wing for him.

there are TONS of women who would go for a guy like str8up (minus his current pessimism mind you) but none of them are party girls.

moreover his line of business over exposes him to big boobie blonde bimbos, which doesn't help the matter.

if i lived in the US id grab this guy and take him out and i bet you anything i'd point out all kinds of more 'convervative' (yet attractive) women and that normally he would probably never even notice.

 

[joekerr31]

Just like YOU think it is so hard to find a quality girl, many WOMEN think the same thing of men. It is when you take such a fatalistic view of things that you set yourself up for failure and more failure on top of failure!

I also agree with Concordian that you are giving yourself way too much credit in the looks department, but of course you won't see it. I also think that not only are you not as hot as you think... but neither is the personality you present to "quality women".

on the quality point. im one for saying there are lots of quality women. but i really need to take a moment to qualify that statement. a woman can be quality, but that's not enough, there needs to be compatibility as well.

there are lots of quality women who im not compatible with. as a result, if i were dating them, we'd end up stepping on each others toes all night (do use a dance analogy).

so quality is hard to find, but then you also must have compatibility (physical attraction, belief system, intelligence, manners, etc.)

on the point of str8ups looks. i've never once heard him say he was a GQ model. moreover, if by chance he's said he's an 8 (im not sure if he has or not), i've seen pictures of women that he considers 8/9 and he is in line with those women (personally i put those women around a 6/7).

anyhooooo - unless str8up is on here saying 'im da bomb. im hotter than brad pitt. why am i dealing with all these b*tches?" then i think folks needs to lay off the comments regarding his looks.

moreover, he shared what he looks like with people (which he didn't have to do) and its VERY low class to use it to slap his nuts. i understand people bring it up because they think that he is going after women who are out of his league - but everyone needs to stay clear of knocking someone's looks when they did not have to share what they looked like in the first place.

 

[ketostix]

I know my value, if that's what you mean. And I'm not gonna get into the whole thing about "independent career women" cause the point will be lost on you.



So tell me, how is a woman supposed to be treated?

Same way a MAN is supposed to be treated, but in society we make a DISTINCTION that a woman should be treated a certain way, with no such provision for a man. Just another stone thrown at men who are defenseless to fight back in "polite" society.



I have no desire to do such.



I don't know where anyone picked up that I have an inflated opinion of my looks, but whatever. Personally I could care less whether or not YOU think I am attractive, for numerous reasons, but lets just say that based upon having had relationships/sex/intimate contact with numerous good looking women I think it's safe to conclude that most women would not conclude that I am ugly.



Again, where do you people get this from? When did I even HINT to being pissed about being snubbed by a woman? Go back and reread the OP or any other post I have made and tell me how you came to that conclusion.

Iqqi got owned again. why doesn't she give it up. You know, she is a a prime example of everything you were talking about in this thread, Str8up. I guess it's no wonder it puts a fire under her azz.

 

[joekerr31]

oh fyi str8up - you are good enough looking to score with 75% of the women out there. so don't let any comments on looks get you down.

 

[Latinoman]

on the quality point. im one for saying there are lots of quality women. but i really need to take a moment to qualify that statement. a woman can be quality, but that's not enough, there needs to be compatibility as well.

there are lots of quality women who im not compatible with. as a result, if i were dating them, we'd end up stepping on each others toes all night (do use a dance analogy).

so quality is hard to find, but then you also must have compatibility (physical attraction, belief system, intelligence, manners, etc.)

on the point of str8ups looks. i've never once heard him say he was a GQ model. moreover, if by chance he's said he's an 8 (im not sure if he has or not), i've seen pictures of women that he considers 8/9 and he is in line with those women (personally i put those women around a 6/7).

anyhooooo - unless str8up is on here saying 'im da bomb. im hotter than brad pitt. why am i dealing with all these b*tches?" then i think folks needs to lay off the comments regarding his looks.

moreover, he shared what he looks like with people (which he didn't have to do) and its VERY low class to use it to slap his nuts. i understand people bring it up because they think that he is going after women who are out of his league - but everyone needs to stay clear of knocking someone's looks when they did not have to share what they looked like in the first place.

I totally agree with you. Unless IQQI shares a picture of himself/herself...then she has no room to talk.

I do agree with her about he hanging with the wrong crowd.

 

[Latinoman]

oh fyi str8up - you are good enough looking to score with 75% of the women out there. so don't let any comments on looks get you down.

I totally agree with you.

 

[jophil28]

career man?

All a princess really is, is a woman with standards for how a man treats her.

Are you freakin' serious ? The "princess " types do not have "standards " , they have a bloated sense of "entitlement" . They are classically Narcissistic.
The expectations that these women hold are breathtakingly crass . IT seems to be their belief that they are due men's fawning worship just because they are an attractive female with the golden ticket between their legs.

" Standards", my a$$ !

 

[Latinoman]

Are you freakin' serious ? The "princess " types do not have "standards " , they have a bloated sense of "entitlement" . They are classically Narcissistic.
The expectations that these women hold are breathtakingly crass . IT seems to be their belief that they are due men's fawning worship just because they are an attractive female with the golden ticket between their legs.

" Standards", my a$$ !

9 out of 10 have Daddy issues too.

 

[joekerr31]

Are you freakin' serious ? The "princess " types do not have "standards " , they have a bloated sense of "entitlement" . They are classically Narcissistic.
The expectations that these women hold are breathtakingly crass . IT seems to be their belief that they are due men's fawning worship just because they are an attractive female with the golden ticket between their legs.

" Standards", my a$$ !

but at the same time, these women only hold such standards because us men play to it.

these women wouldn't have the attitude they have if there weren't guys out there more than happy to enable and reward it for a taste of that p*ssy.

but i do agree - the women with the 'princess' fantasy are living in exactly that, a fantasy, one held up by hole between their legs.

its pretty amazing how a simple hole has such a profound impact on the world.

 

[Metro3pilot]

ts pretty amazing how a simple hole has such a profound impact on the world.

never has a quote been more true than that ....

:rockon:

 

[Gerard-890]

Let me give you an example.

A guy has an internal "belief" that he will always be overweight and no nutrition/diet/exercise program will work for him. He "sees" his body as fat and can't ACCEPT the truth that he can change this situation.

All diets look messed up to this guy, all exercising looks stupid, and he continues to sit there in pity.

There was another example in the Bible where folks were jumping in the water to be healed, but a guy (sick as hell) was just sitting by the water and was EXPECTING someone else to throw him in. Jesus said, "Do you want to be healed?" The guy said, "Yes," Jesus said then get your tail in the water. The guy didn't move because in his mind, "someone must throw me in."

Beliefs are STRONG and determine our actions. They are a result of REINFORCED thoughts. You have a "thought" or a particular "viewpoint" then you receive some type of reinforcement from every life on that particular thought or viewpoint, now it starts to become one of your internal beliefs and concepts.

Once it's a belief and internal concept, NATURALLY AND UNCONSCIOUSLY, you will start to BEHAVE in accordance to that internal concept and belief.

How you BEHAVE determines what types of non-verbal and verbal communication you will give to the world, which determines how the world "sees" you, which determines whether you will ultimately be successful or not.

This also includes the CHOICES you make with your time, energy, focus, etc. All of these things ultimately decide success or failure.

YOUR BELIEF does NOT have to be correct. The same procedure still applies.

What we must do is learn how to SCRUNTIZIE our internal beliefs and research them to see if they have merit.

It's important NOT to have POSITIVE or NEGATIVE beliefs, but instead have TRUE beliefs. Positive beliefs are nothing but denial, and negative beliefs are nothing but stupidity.

Str8up is a prime example of stupidity. His internal negative beliefs are NOT correct, have been researched and statisically proven wrong, ARE wrong, and just need to be eliminated.

This country AMAZES me. Everybody talks about how bad the world is, how corrupt the government is, how corrupt the business owners are......when in actuality these people AREN'T even being harmed by anybody in particular. How the hell can someone be corrupt if they haven't harmed you?

90% of this country's beliefs are negative and stupid. It's why they stay in poverty (even having a nice job due to high debt by buying stupid things), it's why they stay fat (despite FREE INFORMATION on high quality dieting and exercise).

I have no remorse for the person who buys and decorates his own casket.

 

[jophil28]

9 out of 10 have Daddy issues too.

Regrettably , this is true.

The "princesses" that I have had the misfortune to date have either had highly indulgent fathers OR highly abusive fathers.


I am sure that any of you psych majors could enlighten us on the last type..