Dating Sites Question About Incentives

[davidsonj73]

Which dating sites have their incentives aligned with men's best interests? Whether that is to just get laid, find a significant other, or even get married. Which dating sites actually want men to succeed, not just get our money without us even meeting women from them?

 

[BPH]

Just go out and talk to women dude.

 

[corrector]

That's a wierd question since the success on dating sites depends on how much traction you have with the women there rather than the dating app or website policies. They are just the messenger and don't really have anything much to do with your success or lack of it. Generally if your picture and profile stands out (in a good way) compared to other guys then you should find success. I don't use dating apps/online dating much myself because I know I don't have a good profile or pics to use and will be wasting my time.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Any app or site that allows direct messaging (i.e. doesn't rely strictly on looks-based matching so you're not reduced to a physical commodity) and also anything not owned by the Match group as they are too ban-happy.

 

[Lean Baby Face]

Doesn't really matter, desperate thirsty men will always find their way to flood any dating website with an active female user base, even if its target group are traditional women. And, if it has a free messaging option, expect it to be overrun by scammers and bots as well.

Actually, this year I tried out a dating website/app I hadn't used since 2021, and the amount of fakes writing perverted messages to me with weird-looking links in them got so extreme and tiring that I had to delete my profile again.

I think the websites where you have to pay to do everything are slightly better because it centers the serious people (the ones that are left at least) more at one place and also keeps the fake profiles away.

 

[CornbreadFed]

All of them, now start swiping

 

[Hoodie]

Problem with dating apps, is there is no barrier to talk to them.
It doesn't require you to be confident and brave, like you need when going up to a girl.
And second, you don't know if the attraction is there until you meet up.
So you could be wasting alot of time, for someone who you don't even click with.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

And second, you don't know if the attraction is there until you meet up.

I would argue that, with photo based apps, you both are attracted to each other if you match.

 

[corrector]

Problem with dating apps, is there is no barrier to talk to them.
It doesn't require you to be confident and brave, like you need when going up to a girl.

You are more likely to get an interaction if you go up to a girl and talk to her. With dating websites (ie I tried them in the past but never did the app thing), there are so many ignores, no replies (ie and I would imagine left swipes for "modern" dating apps), that this would be a soul crushing experience in and of itself, especially if you know there is some Chad/Tyrone that is cleaning house. It sounds good on paper (ie no risk of rejection, hiding behind a screen, etc....) but when you go back to see if you got a reply or a match and you get nothing, that's still a disappointment/rejection.

I would venture to say that it is less soul-crushing if you interact with a lady in-person compared to online because you don't have this delayed rejection thing that plays with your head.

 

[Bingo-Player]

None of them as their all run by women

Women may "want" sex as much as men but the reality is most men are prepared to pay a far far higher price both in money and time to get sex from women

Be that directly or indirectly

The apps know theres a far greater number of needy men on there , men whom will pay for boosts and spotlights and all the other bullsh1t they've come up with

the worst part is theres hardly any interested women left on them , the women that are left are literally just on there to complain about what they don't want

You could put a piece of punctuation in the wrong place and you'd get ghosted

That's how pointless the whole thing has become

If modern men had any gumption they would just boycott the apps that's the only way you'll see any change

 

[Hamurabimbi]

You are more likely to get an interaction if you go up to a girl and talk to her. With dating websites (ie I tried them in the past but never did the app thing), there are so many ignores, no replies (ie and I would imagine left swipes for "modern" dating apps), that this would be a soul crushing experience in and of itself, especially if you know there is some Chad/Tyrone that is cleaning house. It sounds good on paper (ie no risk of rejection, hiding behind a screen, etc....) but when you go back to see if you got a reply or a match and you get nothing, that's still a disappointment/rejection.

I would venture to say that it is less soul-crushing if you interact with a lady in-person compared to online because you don't have this delayed rejection thing that plays with your head.

I would imagine getting no matches on OLD would indeed be soul crushing. Whereas getting that little jingle from Tinder that lets you know you got a match is definitely a dopamine rush.
It is a big risk-reward decision. One that shouldn’t be taken lightly.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Which dating sites have their incentives aligned with men's best interests? Whether that is to just get laid, find a significant other, or even get married. Which dating sites actually want men to succeed, not just get our money without us even meeting women from them?

none exist because there is enough flawed men willing to support a flawed online dating system. Until you see MTCH head down to $5 a share or less, there will be no innovation.

https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/MTCH/

Match has consistently bought out the competition and made them worse. When a new dating company comes up, match buys them and ruins them. I'm not sure when things will change, but online dating apps are not sustainable as they are now. When online dating system values men as much as women, things will change. When women get 100x more "likes" then the equivalent man, that is a problem. Fix this problem then we will know that the online dating market is at equilibrium and is providing value to society..

 

[DJ Novice]

I’ve found OLD has a very high rejection rate as a guy.

Your ego needs to be strong as it can destroy your self confidence.

You will get rejected by 5s and 10s and all in between.

Ghosting after connecting (online and after an in person date) is very common.

Women are plate spinning as much as men, women have many more options and the slightest misstep by you can end things prematurely.

Go in with low expectations and you won’t be disappointed.

 

[Slowhandluke]

I’ve found OLD has a very high rejection rate as a guy.

Your ego needs to be strong as it can destroy your self confidence.

You will get rejected by 5s and 10s and all in between.

Ghosting after connecting (online and after an in person date) is very common.

Women are plate spinning as much as men, women have many more options and the slightest misstep by you can end things prematurely.

Go in with low expectations and you won’t be disappointed.

Just lie. Online dating promotes people not forming long term relationships. Online dating promotes people lying; women do it naturally - make up, flattering photos, over-inflated ego, etc.. etc.. Want quick casual stuff? Either be a Chad or lie. Remember the tinder swindler?

Remember, dating apps can create some sort of income/job verification.. A review system.. background check system... etc.. etc.. but they don't because they encourage casual hook ups... It's in their best interest. To think otherwise, is to be illogical. Dating apps promote people lying to each other. Remember that CEO that you as a young girl, hooked up with? Well, he was just the pool boy... but in your mind, you will always think you were "that close" to dating the CEO... Or that young doctor? Nope, the odds are good, he was just working at Starbucks.

Granted there are probably CEO's and young doctors, etc.. on the apps... But come on, they are going to be very rare... After all, if a man is a CEO or a young doctor, the odds are he's not going to need to be on any app.