Dating Sites Question About Incentives

[davidsonj73]

Which dating sites have their incentives aligned with men's best interests? Whether that is to just get laid, find a significant other, or even get married. Which dating sites actually want men to succeed, not just get our money without us even meeting women from them?

 

[BPH]

Just go out and talk to women dude.

 

[corrector]

That's a wierd question since the success on dating sites depends on how much traction you have with the women there rather than the dating app or website policies. They are just the messenger and don't really have anything much to do with your success or lack of it. Generally if your picture and profile stands out (in a good way) compared to other guys then you should find success. I don't use dating apps/online dating much myself because I know I don't have a good profile or pics to use and will be wasting my time.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Any app or site that allows direct messaging (i.e. doesn't rely strictly on looks-based matching so you're not reduced to a physical commodity) and also anything not owned by the Match group as they are too ban-happy.

 

[Lean Baby Face]

Doesn't really matter, desperate thirsty men will always find their way to flood any dating website with an active female user base, even if its target group are traditional women. And, if it has a free messaging option, expect it to be overrun by scammers and bots as well.

Actually, this year I tried out a dating website/app I hadn't used since 2021, and the amount of fakes writing perverted messages to me with weird-looking links in them got so extreme and tiring that I had to delete my profile again.

I think the websites where you have to pay to do everything are slightly better because it centers the serious people (the ones that are left at least) more at one place and also keeps the fake profiles away.

 

[CornbreadFed]

All of them, now start swiping

 

[Hoodie]

Problem with dating apps, is there is no barrier to talk to them.
It doesn't require you to be confident and brave, like you need when going up to a girl.
And second, you don't know if the attraction is there until you meet up.
So you could be wasting alot of time, for someone who you don't even click with.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

And second, you don't know if the attraction is there until you meet up.

I would argue that, with photo based apps, you both are attracted to each other if you match.

 

[corrector]

Problem with dating apps, is there is no barrier to talk to them.
It doesn't require you to be confident and brave, like you need when going up to a girl.

You are more likely to get an interaction if you go up to a girl and talk to her. With dating websites (ie I tried them in the past but never did the app thing), there are so many ignores, no replies (ie and I would imagine left swipes for "modern" dating apps), that this would be a soul crushing experience in and of itself, especially if you know there is some Chad/Tyrone that is cleaning house. It sounds good on paper (ie no risk of rejection, hiding behind a screen, etc....) but when you go back to see if you got a reply or a match and you get nothing, that's still a disappointment/rejection.

I would venture to say that it is less soul-crushing if you interact with a lady in-person compared to online because you don't have this delayed rejection thing that plays with your head.

 

[Bingo-Player]

None of them as their all run by women

Women may "want" sex as much as men but the reality is most men are prepared to pay a far far higher price both in money and time to get sex from women

Be that directly or indirectly

The apps know theres a far greater number of needy men on there , men whom will pay for boosts and spotlights and all the other bullsh1t they've come up with

the worst part is theres hardly any interested women left on them , the women that are left are literally just on there to complain about what they don't want

You could put a piece of punctuation in the wrong place and you'd get ghosted

That's how pointless the whole thing has become

If modern men had any gumption they would just boycott the apps that's the only way you'll see any change

 

[Hamurabimbi]

You are more likely to get an interaction if you go up to a girl and talk to her. With dating websites (ie I tried them in the past but never did the app thing), there are so many ignores, no replies (ie and I would imagine left swipes for "modern" dating apps), that this would be a soul crushing experience in and of itself, especially if you know there is some Chad/Tyrone that is cleaning house. It sounds good on paper (ie no risk of rejection, hiding behind a screen, etc....) but when you go back to see if you got a reply or a match and you get nothing, that's still a disappointment/rejection.

I would venture to say that it is less soul-crushing if you interact with a lady in-person compared to online because you don't have this delayed rejection thing that plays with your head.

I would imagine getting no matches on OLD would indeed be soul crushing. Whereas getting that little jingle from Tinder that lets you know you got a match is definitely a dopamine rush.
It is a big risk-reward decision. One that shouldn’t be taken lightly.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Which dating sites have their incentives aligned with men's best interests? Whether that is to just get laid, find a significant other, or even get married. Which dating sites actually want men to succeed, not just get our money without us even meeting women from them?

none exist because there is enough flawed men willing to support a flawed online dating system. Until you see MTCH head down to $5 a share or less, there will be no innovation.

https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/MTCH/

Match has consistently bought out the competition and made them worse. When a new dating company comes up, match buys them and ruins them. I'm not sure when things will change, but online dating apps are not sustainable as they are now. When online dating system values men as much as women, things will change. When women get 100x more "likes" then the equivalent man, that is a problem. Fix this problem then we will know that the online dating market is at equilibrium and is providing value to society..

 

[DJ Novice]

I’ve found OLD has a very high rejection rate as a guy.

Your ego needs to be strong as it can destroy your self confidence.

You will get rejected by 5s and 10s and all in between.

Ghosting after connecting (online and after an in person date) is very common.

Women are plate spinning as much as men, women have many more options and the slightest misstep by you can end things prematurely.

Go in with low expectations and you won’t be disappointed.

 

[Slowhandluke]

I’ve found OLD has a very high rejection rate as a guy.

Your ego needs to be strong as it can destroy your self confidence.

You will get rejected by 5s and 10s and all in between.

Ghosting after connecting (online and after an in person date) is very common.

Women are plate spinning as much as men, women have many more options and the slightest misstep by you can end things prematurely.

Go in with low expectations and you won’t be disappointed.

Just lie. Online dating promotes people not forming long term relationships. Online dating promotes people lying; women do it naturally - make up, flattering photos, over-inflated ego, etc.. etc.. Want quick casual stuff? Either be a Chad or lie. Remember the tinder swindler?

Remember, dating apps can create some sort of income/job verification.. A review system.. background check system... etc.. etc.. but they don't because they encourage casual hook ups... It's in their best interest. To think otherwise, is to be illogical. Dating apps promote people lying to each other. Remember that CEO that you as a young girl, hooked up with? Well, he was just the pool boy... but in your mind, you will always think you were "that close" to dating the CEO... Or that young doctor? Nope, the odds are good, he was just working at Starbucks.

Granted there are probably CEO's and young doctors, etc.. on the apps... But come on, they are going to be very rare... After all, if a man is a CEO or a young doctor, the odds are he's not going to need to be on any app.

 

[Doctor Doom]

Which dating sites actually want men to succeed, not just get our money without us even meeting women from them?

Answer: none of them.
OLD is past its prime. You’ll succeed with single moms, whales, scammers and bots.

 

[corrector]

I’ve found OLD has a very high rejection rate as a guy.

Your ego needs to be strong as it can destroy your self confidence.

You will get rejected by 5s and 10s and all in between.

Ghosting after connecting (online and after an in person date) is very common.

Women are plate spinning as much as men, women have many more options and the slightest misstep by you can end things prematurely.

Go in with low expectations and you won’t be disappointed.

That is not to mention if you do find someone there if it will work out to be a successful relationship. Remember, a woman you met from there knows she has allot of options and may not be as willing to fight for a relationship that has past it's Honeymoon phase and things start geting more serious and there is a fight and/or name calling. Always one foot out the door and back to OLD when it comes to women you meet from there.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Quit being lazy. Get dressed and leave the house. Go play tennis, go to yoga, go to an art gallery opening or a home decor symposium.

Don't want to? Not in shape? Don't own any decent clothes, are overweight?

QUIT BEIING LAZY.

Get in shape = effort
Dress well = effort
Go somewhere cultured = effort

I.E. not lazy

The hot girls don't use OLD anyhow. They don't need to.

Go out and meet prople

OLD is like all the idiotic fad diets to lose weight by doing nothing. Everyone wants the no effort fsntasy. That is why OLD makes bank just like the latest weight loss "hack".....people will pay billions to believe the no effort required fantasy.....precisely because most people are LAZY.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Advice from the old lady:

Quit being lazy. Get dressed and leave the house. Go play tennis, go to yoga, go to an art gallery opening or a home decor symposium.

Don't want to? Not in shape? Don't own any decent clothes, are overweight?

QUIT BEIING LAZY.

Get in shape = effort
Dress well = effort
Go somewhere cultured = effort

I.E. not lazy

The hot girls don't use OLD anyhow. They don't need to.

Go out and meet prople

OLD is like all the idiotic fad diets to lose weight by doing nothing. Everyone wants the no effort fsntasy. That is why OLD makes bank just like the latest weight loss "hack".....people will pay billions to believe the no effort required fantasy.....precisely because most people are LAZY.

Average women must date average men. Trust me, most women are average. Average men aren't "above average men".... Stop telling them to be what they are not, and cannot be. Unless average women understand that they are average and must date average men (flaws and all - because... well, they ARE average); prepare to be single. These women have moms.. and their mom's mom, all dated average men for the most part, and on average these average men (also know as Dads) were loved by and respected by their mom's. And lets be honest, most average women are alive today because their mom wasn't so GOD DAM picky.

Average women can take the red pill or the blue pill. One will likely lead to loneliness.. and the other could lead to happy families. It's their choice. In the long run, it wouldn't matter because Darwinism will take out the women who chooses poorly...

 

[BeExcellent]

Average women must date average men. Trust me, most women are average. Average men aren't "above average men".... Stop telling them to be what they are not, and cannot be. Unless average women understand that they are average and must date average men (flaws and all - because... well, they ARE average); prepare to be single. These women have moms.. and their mom's mom, all dated average men for the most part, and on average these average men (also know as Dads) were loved by and respected by their mom's. And lets be honest, most average women are alive today because their mom wasn't so GOD DAM picky.

Average women can take the red pill or the blue pill. One will likely lead to loneliness.. and the other could lead to happy families. It's their choice. In the long run, it wouldn't matter because Darwinism will take out the women who chooses poorly...

Hmmmmm. Quit crying about women being picky. OLD is for the lazy. Those who do not prioritize social skill. Men more than women because yes women are more likely to use OLD for attention although I do know a few couples who met that way. One is my cousin with her PhD in mathematics and her engineer husband. They are well matched and are both objectively average in the apprarance department. Neither are big socializers. So that emphasizes your point.

I'm not telling guys to expect a Victoria's Secret model when they are, to your point, average. But guys still need to make an effort to dress, groom, make a living, and get out of the house. Women are not going to show up on the average man's doorstep....he's going to need to make a bloody effort.

Or you can cry about women being too picky, without getting out of your boxers and taking a shower.

Chances are if a man thinks women are "too picky" its because the women he wants find him invisible. Part of that is adjusting to reality, but much of it is also adjusting the self defeating attitudes we see in the echo chamber.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Hmmmmm. Quit crying about women being picky.

I'm not "crying" about it. It's just a warning. When someone tells a person a bridge is under construction, they can listen or not. However, if they drive over the bridge and fall into the water and get hurt; don't blame the messenger. The only person that is to blame is themselves.

In the past, average women have always accepted average men. During Romeo's and Juliet time, people rarely took showers. Remember, indoor plumbing was just created within the past 3 generations. Romeo probably stank to high heaven. He probably didn't take showers for months at a time -- if not yearly. However, Juliet was fine with it. Romeo probably only had one shirt and pair of pants that he wore for months at a time.

Hell, women in the wild frontier of the American plains loved their husbands regardless of how he smelled or how he didn't change his cloths so much (yeah, and lets not even discuss sanitation during these times). The average height of a man during the civil war was 5'6". Women didn't complain, "oooh, I would date Joseph.. But dang he's only 5'6" and too short" or "I would date William, but he's only 5'5" and I really want to date someone who towers or me", etc.. etc..

Throughout history, average women have always accepted average men for who they are. Only in our modern times, have average women been conditioned to think average men "suck"... Oh, men don't do this enough.. they don't do that enough.. etc.. etc... spare me the complaints. Most women are AVERAGE.. but they expect the world. Regardless, if these women don't heed the warnings, they will end up "going off a bridge" - hurt... But who cares, Darwin will take care of these women ultimately and all the smarter people will prevail. Perhaps it will be better for the gene pool. Who knows? It is sad though, sitting on the side lines and seeing this occur. It's like a tragic trainwreck.. but the trains keep on piling up at the junction and all you want to do is yell out, "stop it, you idiots... don't you see? you guys are just causing this to get worse.. "