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It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. ---- Mark Twain.

Wow, you're right on about this. I'm not in Evel's leauge but I can relate.

Here are the rules: I am a man so it is my desire to sleep with women as quickly as possible and with as many as I can. If I can achieve this then I am a stud. You are a woman so sleeping with men quickly makes you easy and sleeping with many of them makes you a wh0re. Most women will...

You're discussing two completely different things. One hand you talk about being content. I myself can never be content with what I have. I always want more. More money, more women.. it's an endless cycle I know but that's who I am. Now to be happy is a state of mind. I am happy since I...

It would make me think twice... If I sleep with a girl on the first date I usually leave a $100 on the table to make it extra dirty.

You're talking too long. Phone calls should be kept under 15 minutes TOPS.

Yesterday I was at Wal-Mart and crossed through the section that had the cake mixes, etc. I saw a girl grabbing a bag of Brownie mix and I said "Mmmmm.. brownies. You're such a good friend." She said, "I'm making them for my sorority." I said, "which one?" Bla, bla, bla, bla, this girl...

I once saw a movie about a sweet and sensitive guy who liked the girl so much but he would never get the nerve to ask her out. Then a bad-azz cokswinging mudafuka came in and slammed her so hard her nose bled. I think the movie was Pretty in Pink or something like that. Molly Ringwald's a...

One of the hottest girls I've ever had was this girl who I met at her job and then subsequently called to meet up for some drinks. Now I never pick girls up for a date. I usually have them meet me somewhere. So when she pulls up she's not the one driving - her friend gave her a ride. I...

Hey spam... when I went to high school I used to know a guy who was fat, not good looking and lonely - plus he drove a sh1tty car. He was always depressed.... We used to joke that if he were to go on a diet, fixed himself up and got a better car he could probably pick up some wh0res. Well...

If you put a lineup of all the b1tches I've ever made out with in my life I bet you I wouldn't recognize 80% of them. I tongued so many girls a few years ago at Mardi Gras alone that I got mono when I got home! Fuhgedaboutit. Most chicks now a days are makeout wh0res anyway. The days of a...

A feminist believes that the reason women make 76 cents to the male dollar is because the "patriarch" is biased towards women and will naturally pay them less for the same work. A realist can see that it would not make economic sense to pay someone more simply because of their gender...

Well said.

At least you kissed her.

Visit all the classes and take a quick look in the window. Go for the one that has the most hot women in the class as students. No sense learning the forbidden dance of love if you're going to be doing it with a grandmother.

Your name is AverageJoe5.... Does this mean you think you're average? If so, then does that mean that you are?

If I was a chick and some dude asked me out through a text message I'd think he was a complete loser. Pick up the phone and call.

There is no hidden mystery to seducing women. Some girls will like you. Some girls won't. Out of the girls who like you some will sleep with you. Some girls won't. Step 1 - Go up to a girl and talk about anything. This is where being an interesting person helps. If you're dull you're...

Girls are too self absorbed to want to learn anything about you for the first two months anyway. Their tiny little brains just can't comprehend the notion of empathy or camaraderie. So if she knows the real you it's because you volunteered - not because she asked.

There is no accidents with women. If a girl flirts with you it's because she likes you. Right now you're afraid of rejection. This is the reason you choose to talk instead of to act. An AFC asks, "Can I kiss you?" A DJ just does it.