Your thoughts on men hitting their stride with women and being f*ckboys after 30.

[Divorced w 3]

What I think is either shooed from, or implied at least as a negative, is dating single mothers. So at 40, in the last 2 years, never have I once gone out with a single mother.

Dialogue of any consistency landed mostly in the early 30’s, while casual sex typically ran the spectrum of early 20’s to late 30’s. Having been in a 18 month relationship with a childless woman whom I met at 33, I learned that even as a elementary school teacher, the issue of priority equality and attempting to create an environment of equal time between all members was not something that ever seemed to be totally resolved. In other words, when they’re not your kids it’s really hard to ‘get it.’ Especially when you have never been in that environment at all.

So what I am saying is, and I just wonder - what I did in my teens and 20’s before I got married - then obviously made a massive mistake in a marriage - but then why not go back into casual relationships which mostly likely can blossom into something with a single parent - just not rule out childless either

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

It’s typical Red Pill catch up and getting Chad’s leftovers. Late to the party, but that’s other men’s choices that I don’t care about. RP tortoises had to “do the work” and contribute to GDP and hit the pavement while teenaged broccoli heads, criminals, and couch surfers attract women by way of existing.

Richard Cooper, Myron Gaines, Michael Sartain, and the like—late to the party, frantic, overly serious, middle-aged cleaner-uppers and catcher-uppers.

Not necessarily.

1. Plenty of younger women are sleeping with older guys, especially these days and yeah, in many cases it is a Sugar Baby relationship but you are hitting her in her prime while MOST young guys are not

2. Plenty of guys got married young due to their upbringing or were like me and spent most of their 20s in LTRs since we, mistakingly, looked down on the player lifestyle and would be shamed for it in most places outside of big cities

3. Contrary to popular belief, most "Chads" are not smashing, I am sure @CornbreadFed can confirm this too but a lot of these "Chads" find a Stacy to wife up or settle down with FAST

4. You use the worst of the red pill to make an example overall

5. I have met Michael IRL and can confirm that he most definitely has hot girls he is sleeping with

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

It doesn’t. See my post if you wish. If a guy is not a womanizer by 30, chances are he won’t be one.

This is false and I have seen plenty of counterexamples of it, commonly happens with guys that come off of a divorce and dudes who accumulate resources and freedom later in life. Heck, Hefner did not start Playboy until an older age. I would ask you to expand your worldview some more here.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

Tbh I really hit my stride from 28-31 and banged my most amount of women. I've usually been a late bloomer.

I used to suffer from big anxiety and overthink everything (still happens), but I just learned a lot from the past. Plus I'm much better looking now.

 

[SW15]

What society do you live in? American society pressures no one to get married.

I disagree that there's no pressure in American culture to get married.

I am a never married 41 year old male who has felt some level of pressure in my interactions to get married.

I think both men and women feel pressure. I think pressure is different for men and women. I'll discuss the American male experience of pressure below.

For American men, pressure to marry mainly comes from 3 sources....

1. Friends/social circle
2. Family/parents
3. Religion

Friends/Social Circle

Most men have friends and some social circle. The members of most men's social circles are similarly aged. When a man reaches his late 20s/early 30s, there will often be a flurry of marriages in his social circle.

Most men will have a social circle with members with a blue pill ideology towards romantic relationships.

Most men will see all their friends getting married and they'll start to wonder about themselves. They'll wonder why they haven't gotten married and if they should get married because it seems that's what all their friends are doing. Red pill men are not exempt from this thought process though most red pill men know how to handle it better.

Family/Parents

Some men also face familial pressures to marry. Men will see similarly aged siblings and cousins marrying, often around the same time that their friends are marrying. This adds to the thoughts and feelings described above.

Some parents can put pressure on an unmarried adult child to marry. It depends on the parent/child relationship.

Religion

Many men were raised in Christian religions that are based around marriage. This can compound the parental pressures mentioned above to marry. Many Christian faiths ban pre-marital sex. There are people that marry so that they can have sex within their religion.

 

[SW15]

1. Plenty of younger women are sleeping with older guys, especially these days and yeah, in many cases it is a Sugar Baby relationship but you are hitting her in her prime while MOST young guys are not

You have observed something that happens. How common is it? There's a case that it is less common than you think that it is.

The Pew Research Center recently released some data points to show that US husbands and wives are very close in age (see below). On average, men are only 2.2 years older than their wives.

There's a key question to ask. How do age gaps differ between non-marital couples and these marital couples in the Pew data?

I don't think that they would vary drastically. Most people are blue pilled and most people end up married.

Most men are pussie beggars for similar aged women after age 30.

A growing share of U.S. husbands and wives are roughly the same age

On average, husbands and wives were 2.2 years apart in age in 2022, down from 2.4 years in 2000 and 4.9 years in 1880.

www.pewresearch.org

.

3. Contrary to popular belief, most "Chads" are not smashing, I am sure @CornbreadFed can confirm this too but a lot of these "Chads" find a Stacy to wife up or settle down with FAST

I agree with this point. "Chads" do smash but sometimes for limited periods of time. In colleges, most fraternity members opt for a sorority girlfriend. This can be considered "Chad and Stacy" but that's not the full truth. "Chad & Stacy" are only from the top tier fraternities and sororities. Some guys in top fraternities put up high notch count but a lot will get a monogamous relationship with a Stacy tier (8+ female) from a top sorority.

A lot of "Chads" do eventually settle down with a "Stacy" and that's a pairing that makes sense. A very good looking man forms an LTR (often leading to marriage) with a very good looking woman.

Women like the "6" range woman in the video below are upset. This "6" range women can have shorter term sex with many 8.5+ range men but can't find an 8.5+ range man for a longer term commitment. This eventually forces a 6-6.5 range type female to settle for a 6-6.5 range male and that's far less exciting for the woman than the days of her sex with 8.5+ range men.

8.5+ range men will only settle with some 8+ woman in looks for the most part.

 

[Manure Spherian]

This is false and I have seen plenty of counterexamples of it, commonly happens with guys that come off of a divorce and dudes who accumulate resources and freedom later in life. Heck, Hefner did not start Playboy until an older age. I would ask you to expand your worldview some more here.

This is actually consistent with what I’ve been saying: some men have a jumpstart because of their DNA at young ages and others need to “do the work” and get rewarded later (hence my term catcher-upper)…. IF such work results in especially high income and status.

I don’t deny what you wrote.

 

[GoodMan32]

This stood out to me, so I wanted to quote it. As a guy who’s 31 and never dated, this hit home and is a pretty big concern of mine for a couple of reasons. It highlights how far behind I am since I’m still at the stage of wanting to date for fun and exploration (being a f*ck boy) while society is saying its time to settle down. Also when it comes to the dating pool for my age group, I have a bad feeling it’s gonna be full of women who have settling down in mind and they won’t take me seriously if they were to find out that I’ve never dated. They’ll see it as a waste of time for them because someone’s first relationship never lasts, so they would be entering into a relationship that is guaranteed to fail and never lead to settling down. And to be fair, I want that fun and exploration phase still, so I wouldn’t want to date a woman who has settling down in mind anyway. I just think those women are gonna be the majority at my age unfortunately.

I'm close to your age (33). I've been told I'm too old for the casual sex lifestyle I desire.

To hell with the naysayers.

You're right that many a woman in our age group will likely want to settle down. It would appear this leaves you with 2 main options:

• Go for a younger woman if you can pull one
• Find a woman (of any age) who's either newly divorced or in a sexless/unhappy marriage. I say this as a guy who had an affair with an older married woman in a sexless marriage who was thinking of divorcing her husband

 

[GoodMan32]

Not necessarily.

1. Plenty of younger women are sleeping with older guys, especially these days and yeah, in many cases it is a Sugar Baby relationship but you are hitting her in her prime while MOST young guys are not

2. Plenty of guys got married young due to their upbringing or were like me and spent most of their 20s in LTRs since we, mistakingly, looked down on the player lifestyle and would be shamed for it in most places outside of big cities

3. Contrary to popular belief, most "Chads" are not smashing, I am sure @CornbreadFed can confirm this too but a lot of these "Chads" find a Stacy to wife up or settle down with FAST

4. You use the worst of the red pill to make an example overall

5. I have met Michael IRL and can confirm that he most definitely has hot girls he is sleeping with

Player lifestyles are frowned upon outside of a big city?

I was raised in a small town (population below 20 thousand). My childhood house was only a few miles away from farmland. Yet the player lifestyle was huge at my high school (Even though I didn't partake. Had I gone to high school parties though, I probably could have gotten laid, even with my social awkwardness).

In college, I went to college in a small city. I bedded 6 different broads during college.

Ironically, the big city where I've lived since my mid 20s is where I'm finding it the hardest to live a player lifestyle.

 

[GoodMan32]

I disagree that there's no pressure in American culture to get married.

I am a never married 41 year old male who has felt some level of pressure in my interactions to get married.

I think both men and women feel pressure. I think pressure is different for men and women. I'll discuss the American male experience of pressure below.

For American men, pressure to marry mainly comes from 3 sources....

1. Friends/social circle
2. Family/parents
3. Religion

Friends/Social Circle

Most men have friends and some social circle. The members of most men's social circles are similarly aged. When a man reaches his late 20s/early 30s, there will often be a flurry of marriages in his social circle.

Most men will have a social circle with members with a blue pill ideology towards romantic relationships.

Most men will see all their friends getting married and they'll start to wonder about themselves. They'll wonder why they haven't gotten married and if they should get married because it seems that's what all their friends are doing. Red pill men are not exempt from this thought process though most red pill men know how to handle it better.

Family/Parents

Some men also face familial pressures to marry. Men will see similarly aged siblings and cousins marrying, often around the same time that their friends are marrying. This adds to the thoughts and feelings described above.

Some parents can put pressure on an unmarried adult child to marry. It depends on the parent/child relationship.

Religion

Many men were raised in Christian religions that are based around marriage. This can compound the parental pressures mentioned above to marry. Many Christian faiths ban pre-marital sex. There are people that marry so that they can have sex within their religion.

I remember a time when a woman (born the same year as me) said once a man reaches a certain age and hasn't been married, it makes a woman wonder what's wrong with him (she wasn't saying that about me specifically; she was speaking in generalities).

I (for the most part) have never been the type to do stuff just because everyone else is doing it (I've never smoked weed, I never went to college parties, etc). So the fact "everyone else" is getting married doesn't pressure me (although I certainly see where it might pressure a lot of men)

 

[SW15]

Find a woman (of any age) who's either newly divorced or in a sexless/unhappy marriage. I say this as a guy who had an affair with an older married woman in a sexless marriage who was thinking of divorcing her husband

This is more difficult to put into action in real life than you might think.

There are plenty of newly divorced women on swipe apps. Few will advertise themselves as newly divorced.

Women have immense choices on apps, even newly divorced women in their 30s/40s. Getting a mutual match from a newly divorced woman is less probable.

Newly divorced women do go to bars but so do never married women and longer time divorced women. It would be difficult to specifically target newly divorced women at a bar

There's a bar in a Dallas suburb (Plano) that is known to be a haven for 40+ divorced women. Not all of the divorcees at this bar are newly divorced and I'd say many have been divorced for 1 year or longer. A lot of the female divorcees there are single moms and that's not good for something longer term. It might be acceptable for some guys for shorter term. There have been younger guys (20s-early 30s) that have mainly lived in Dallas and driven up to this Plano bar to try to have same night sex with the 40+ divorcees at this bar. This bar has a strong reputation for that as it has been open for 15+ years. Some newer bars in Plano might also be popular with 40+ single mom type divorcees. I have never written up this venue on the Dallas thread before.

Targeting married women is more difficult for unmarried men. The typical daygamer unmarried man at a place like a grocery store or mall isn't motivated to approach a woman wearing a wedding ring. He has no idea about the quality of her marriage. He sees a ring and doesn't want to waste his time. Some unhappily married women do take off their wedding rings in an attempt to get approached in the real world. A lot of unhappily married women will have affairs through their social networks rather than from a stranger.

I remember a time when a woman (born the same year as me) said once a man reaches a certain age and hasn't been married, it makes a woman wonder what's wrong with him (she wasn't saying that about me specifically; she was speaking in generalities).

This is a stereotype that is old and refuses to die. I think it emerged when Silents/Boomers were reaching middle age.

Older women (30+ or even 35+) have tended to favor divorced men for LTRs over never married men in these older age categories. Divorced men have a failed marriage to their names whereas a never married man has never failed in marriage. To be fair to divorced men, the failed marriage might not be their fault to a good degree. In most cases, the divorced man wasn't the one who filed to end the marriage. I think a failed marriage shows someone is worse in marriage than someone who has no track record in marriage. A guy who avoids a failed marriage could be considered a smart man. He's not commitment phobic. He's often making a logical decision based on probability.

The fact that a man has never married doesn't mean anything is wrong with him solely based on that fact alone.

A record number of men and women are reaching age 40 now and have never married, so one might think that stereotype will die soon. Even with a record number of Millennials reaching age 40 now and never having married, most Millennials are getting married prior to age 40.

 

[GoodMan32]

This is more difficult to put into action in real life than you might think.

There are plenty of newly divorced women on swipe apps. Few will advertise themselves as newly divorced.

Women have immense choices on apps, even newly divorced women in their 30s/40s. Getting a mutual match from a newly divorced woman is less probable.

Newly divorced women do go to bars but so do never married women and longer time divorced women. It would be difficult to specifically target newly divorced women at a bar

There's a bar in a Dallas suburb (Plano) that is known to be a haven for 40+ divorced women. Not all of the divorcees at this bar are newly divorced and I'd say many have been divorced for 1 year or longer. A lot of the female divorcees there are single moms and that's not good for something longer term. It might be acceptable for some guys for shorter term. There have been younger guys (20s-early 30s) that have mainly lived in Dallas and driven up to this Plano bar to try to have same night sex with the 40+ divorcees at this bar. This bar has a strong reputation for that as it has been open for 15+ years. Some newer bars in Plano might also be popular with 40+ single mom type divorcees. I have never written up this venue on the Dallas thread before.

Targeting married women is more difficult for unmarried men. The typical daygamer unmarried man at a place like a grocery store or mall isn't motivated to approach a woman wearing a wedding ring. He has no idea about the quality of her marriage. He sees a ring and doesn't want to waste his time. Some unhappily married women do take off their wedding rings in an attempt to get approached in the real world. A lot of unhappily married women will have affairs through their social networks rather than from a stranger.



This is a stereotype that is old and refuses to die. I think it emerged when Silents/Boomers were reaching middle age.

Older women (30+ or even 35+) have tended to favor divorced men for LTRs over never married men in these older age categories. Divorced men have a failed marriage to their names whereas a never married man has never failed in marriage. To be fair to divorced men, the failed marriage might not be their fault to a good degree. In most cases, the divorced man wasn't the one who filed to end the marriage. I think a failed marriage shows someone is worse in marriage than someone who has no track record in marriage. A guy who avoids a failed marriage could be considered a smart man. He's not commitment phobic. He's often making a logical decision based on probability.

The fact that a man has never married doesn't mean anything is wrong with him solely based on that fact alone.

A record number of men and women are reaching age 40 now and have never married, so one might think that stereotype will die soon. Even with a record number of Millennials reaching age 40 now and never having married, most Millennials are getting married prior to age 40.

You make a good point. It's virtually impossible to tell if a woman is newly divorced.

The married woman I had the affair with contacted me based on a craigslist post (This was back in 2015. It wasn't until 2017 that craigslist stopped allowing you to advertise sex).

Interestingly, the unhappily married woman admitted to me that she had been wearing low cut tops out in public in the hopes a man would come onto her. Since she had no luck with that approach, she turned to craigslist as a last resort. I don't remember if she wore a wedding ring.

Getting affairs with a married woman would be a lot easier if craigslist still allowed us to advertise sex. Yeah, I know it's been said on this forum that we need to adapt to changing times (as far as tech methods go). But to the best of my knowledge, no other platform has been able to fill the void of craigslist's sex ads.

Back in 2021, I remember 2 local broads (one married, one not) replying to a non-sexual post I posted on my local craigslist. After exchanging images (I even sent a banana pic to the married woman), it turned out they were attracted to me. There are still ways to get x-rated dialogues through private messages on craigslist; it's just a lot harder (you basically have to hope a woman who's intrigued by your non-sexual post will turn out to be a horndog who finds you attractive).

Alas though, neither of the broads from 2021 craigslist ended up having intercourse with me (that being said, even when craigslist allowed sex ads, a woman replying to your sex ad was no guarantee you'd have sex)

On the topic of the stigma of never being married, I agree, hopefully it will die out as more and more Americans end up in the "never married" category. Being never married doesn't automatically mean there's something wrong with a man; I know. But it certainly can mean there's something wrong with him (There's a reason I've made it to 33 unmarried)

 

[SW15]

Interestingly, the unhappily married woman admitted to me that she had been wearing low cut tops out in public in the hopes a man would come onto her.

She might have worn low cut tops but not been very strategic about the places she went out in public. She probably went to the grocery stores in parts of her city where there were more married people than unmarried people. When I go out and daygame grocery stores, I choose grocery stores in parts of the city where there are few married people. She probably went to other non-bar spots in her city where there weren't many unmarried people and even fewer unmarried daygamers.

to the best of my knowledge, no other platform has been able to fill the void of craigslist's sex ads.

Women generally don't write ads to purely find sex. Men use tech more than women to find romance and sex.

The Ashley Madison data breach scandal of 2015 proved that. Ashley Madison was a ridiculous sausage fest, even worse than Tinder. I think Ashley Madison was ~90% male whereas Tinder is only around 75% male and Hinge-Bumble are around 65% male.

In these days (similar to the past), unhappily married women who want sex typically find it through their social networks.

If they don't find something through their personal networks, some might find it through a Big 3 app (Tinder-Hinge-Bumble) or the Feeld app (a kink type app that originated a 3nder for finding threesomes). Others might randomly show up at bars.

Divorced women are free to use any method they want.

 

[GoodMan32]

She might have worn low cut tops but not been very strategic about the places she went out in public. She probably went to the grocery stores in parts of her city where there were more married people than unmarried people. When I go out and daygame grocery stores, I choose grocery stores in parts of the city where there are few married people. She probably went to other non-bar spots in her city where there weren't many unmarried people and even fewer unmarried daygamers.



Women generally don't write ads to purely find sex. Men use tech more than women to find romance and sex.

The Ashley Madison data breach scandal of 2015 proved that. Ashley Madison was a ridiculous sausage fest, even worse than Tinder. I think Ashley Madison was ~90% male whereas Tinder is only around 75% male and Hinge-Bumble are around 65% male.

In these days (similar to the past), unhappily married women who want sex typically find it through their social networks.

If they don't find something through their personal networks, some might find it through a Big 3 app (Tinder-Hinge-Bumble) or the Feeld app (a kink type app that originated a 3nder for finding threesomes). Others might randomly show up at bars.

Divorced women are free to use any method they want.

You're probably right. The married woman I had the affair with was likely in the wrong environment for her low cut top strategy to work. She lived in a suburb where married families are the norm.

Another thing that certainly couldn't have helped: She was 45 and chubby (had she been 25-30 and fit, she'd obviously get more attention)

I'm aware a man is far more likely than a woman to post a personal ad for sex. All my sex from Craigslist came from a woman replying to an ad I posted. A personal ad is a lot different than an app where a woman decides in 3 seconds whether to swipe left or right on you. Swipe apps are too superficial.

If only there were a viable platform (not a swipe app) where you could post personal ads for sex in the wake of Craigslist shutting down their sex ads.

I've used Bumble. I got some messages (but no sex). I've used Feeld too. Had even worse luck on field (I never even got a message on Feeld)

 

[SW15]

If only there were a viable platform (not a swipe app) where you could post personal ads for sex in the wake of Craigslist shutting down their sex ads.

The website-only model is dead. People seek sex on apps (either Feeld or Tinder-Bumble-Hinge). Also, sex/romance can be found through the DMs on social media platforms (mainly Instagram, but X also works for this).

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

This is actually consistent with what I’ve been saying: some men have a jumpstart because of their DNA at young ages and others need to “do the work” and get rewarded later (hence my term catcher-upper)…. IF such work results in especially high income and status.

I don’t deny what you wrote.

Not exactly DNA, I would say circumstances.

Even the most average looking guy can have lenient parents that let him party and do all that and before you know, he is losing his V card at a younger age.

 

[needimprovement250]

What society do you live in? American society pressures no one to get married.

See my previous post. I’m asking respectfully: how did you get in this position?

I live in America and like SW15, I disagree and think that there’s absolutely pressure to settle down and get married in America.

I’ll try and summarize it the best I can because posts tend to get long when I explain it, but I saw friends get rejected starting back in elementary with innocent schoolyard crushes and I didn’t want to go through the hurt feelings and embarrassment that they did. I felt that there was no point in me even trying since I would probably be guaranteed the same outcome, so I never did try. When I got to high school, I witnessed harsh rejections happen to other guys I knew and it just reinforced this belief I was holding onto. I went to two high schools and at both of them, I had girls approaching me and trying to start conversations. But because of this belief I was holding onto and the negative mindset it brought, I really didn’t reciprocate when they tried to talk to me and I didn’t approach them in return obviously. Eventually the girls who did this gave up and at both high schools I got into the situation where I didn’t talk to any girls because I didn’t know any of them and didn’t have the confidence to anyway, and none of them talked to me because they didn’t know me and the attempts they made never went anywhere. This led to me only talking to other guys at the schools, which looked weird to a lot of classmates. I actually had a group of guy friends I had known for years at my first school that were successful with girls, but they began distancing themselves and excluding me when they saw that I wasn’t getting anywhere with girls. I went on to graduate high school at 18 as a kissless virgin.

After high school, I went to community college and there was no social aspect to that at all. Everyone just goes to class and goes home, you don’t really meet dating prospects like you do at universities. I ended up dropping out of community college and just started working instead, but I mostly worked jobs that were either male dominated or were mostly older people with a couple notable exceptions. Also when I turned 20, I really started to worry about my lack of dating experience and felt that I was now stuck in a catch-22 where I needed to already have experience in order to date and that women will be turned off by my lack of experience. I did end up losing my virginity at 21, but now at 10 years later I’ve had nothing since then. I let this concern about being inexperienced be another thing to hold me back and now I’m still inexperienced at 31 and the lack of experience looks a million times worse than it did in my early 20’s and is so much more unappealing to women now. So at 31, I’ve never once in my life asked a woman out and also have never even asked a woman for her phone number.

That’s just the dating background aspect too, I also still live at home with my parents and don’t have a social circle or a career. When this is all added up, I just feel completely hopeless most of the time and now I’ve turned to alcohol more than ever before because it makes me so depressed and I really do feel like I’m gonna be alone forever at this point.

 

[needimprovement250]

I'm close to your age (33). I've been told I'm too old for the casual sex lifestyle I desire.

To hell with the naysayers.

You're right that many a woman in our age group will likely want to settle down. It would appear this leaves you with 2 main options:

• Go for a younger woman if you can pull one
• Find a woman (of any age) who's either newly divorced or in a sexless/unhappy marriage. I say this as a guy who had an affair with an older married woman in a sexless marriage who was thinking of divorcing her husband

Yeah I’m pretty sure they think that the casual sex lifestyle just makes men our age look immature and pathetic, but I don’t care either. I think its to be expected that people want to sow their wild oats and have fun before getting serious and settling down. So I get annoyed when some people say that you just need to live with the fact that you missed out on the casual and fun phase of dating and you’ll just have to accept that and be ready to settle down when you’re out there dating at your age because that’s what most women in your age group are looking for.

I don’t think either of those options would work for me though. I’m inexperienced at the age of 31 and that hurts your chances so much, it is an awful situation to be in.

Younger women wouldn’t want me because the biggest selling point for them when it comes to an age gap relationship is the guy’s higher experience level. It’s desirable to them because they assume he will have gained a lot of sexual and relationship experience and will be better in bed and at handling a relationship than most men her age. But once they find out that despite the age gap she has far more experience than him, it becomes very alarming and off putting and they’ll run away instantly.

Same goes for the second option, a woman who has as much experience to where she was married and divorced won’t want a guy who’s never dated at all. Neither will women in a sexless marriage because they want men who can give them good sex, and they’ll assume that inexperienced men aren’t capable of doing that.

 

[SW15]

When this is all added up, I just feel completely hopeless most of the time and now I’ve turned to alcohol more than ever before because it makes me so depressed and I really do feel like I’m gonna be alone forever at this point.

You have been on SoSuave for 3 years. What have you actually learned on SoSuave?

In the last 15 years, why haven't you used the internet to learn seduction? Why haven't you lifted weights/played a sport? Attracting women is about looks first. Money, status, and personality also help, but you can seduce on looks alone. @BPH is one of the top seducers on this board based mainly on looks and he's done in a mediocre at best geographic market.

Instead of being obsessed with porn and masturbating, you should have channeled that energy into weight lifting. You could have created a 'Chad' type physique. Instead, you got into porn, masturbation, and alcohol.

You also didn't do well with money, status, or personality. While college isn't for everyone, you could have gone into one of the skilled trades and made a decent living. You could have been a plumber, auto mechanic, welder, etc.

You need to make your entire life right about about getting a shredded physique. Your life is lifting weights, eating clean, no pornography, no masturbation, and alcohol only as social lubricant. You might be able to become a post-30 fucckboi by doing that.

 

[needimprovement250]

You have been on SoSuave for 3 years. What have you actually learned on SoSuave?

In the last 15 years, why haven't you used the internet to learn seduction? Why haven't you lifted weights/played a sport? Attracting women is about looks first. Money, status, and personality also help, but you can seduce on looks alone. @BPH is one of the top seducers on this board based mainly on looks and he's done in a mediocre at best geographic market.

Instead of being obsessed with porn and masturbating, you should have channeled that energy into weight lifting. You could have created a 'Chad' type physique. Instead, you got into porn, masturbation, and alcohol.

You also didn't do well with money, status, or personality. While college isn't for everyone, you could have gone into one of the skilled trades and made a decent living. You could have been a plumber, auto mechanic, welder, etc.

You need to make your entire life right about about getting a shredded physique. Your life is lifting weights, eating clean, no pornography, no masturbation, and alcohol only as social lubricant. You might be able to become a post-30 fucckboi by doing that.

I have learned a lot of hard truths from SS, that’s for sure. Because I found out that I had PIED 10 years ago and felt that I was too damaged from all of the porn and masturbation for seduction to ever give me the results I’m looking for. I’ve lost close to 40 lbs of body fat so even though I haven’t been lifting weights (but I do want to) at least I did make a positive change to my physique. It was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made going to community college right after high school, I had so many family members back then egging me on to go to community college and how it’s such a good choice to do that. If I had gone into a trade program instead, my life would be so much different and better than what it is now. After dropping out, I just worked a series of dead end jobs that had no chance of ever being a career.

I got into alcohol and drugs when I was 16 and it was primarily due to my lack of success with women. Porn started when I was 12 and only got worse as I continued to get older and remained inexperienced and then I completely immersed myself with porn as I began to feel more hopeless from being older and inexperienced.

I’m back in school now, I had to go back to community college unfortunately but I’m going for a certification program and not a transfer degree like I tried for after high school. I also work a series of temporary seasonal jobs at an event center near me so that I can have some money coming in as I’m working on education. The drinking, smoking, and porn is still a frequent thing though, it keeps me numb to the fact that I’ve been alone all my life.