Woman's Point of View

[DELILAH]

Lol, no, I don't expect that at all! And I'm definitely not a feminist. I wouldn't have joined if I got easily offended or was expecting deference, I read enough posts on here to know what I was getting into.

I just see a lot of situations where sometimes guys have trouble understanding women because they don't know what they're thinking, and the answer seems so obvious to me, so I thought I'd offer my insight if needed.

Thanks for the welcome and words of wisdom

I agree. Which is why I joined too.

 

[SaucyBoy]

What I've learned is that a woman always has a litmus test for any man see sees. She will normally size up any man in three seconds.

The litmus test is this: Can I see myself under him or on top of him?

There are other criteria any man will have to pass to get an interest level from a woman. Safety, some indication of resources, etc. These depend on the litmus test being passed.

Strangely, this is also the same litmus test used by men. I certainly do!! I filter out any woman that does not meet it. It's like they aren't even visible. The mind acts this way. It's just that a man stops testing at this stage while a woman will keep testing the man she might be interested in.

An excellent book to read is "The Female Brain" (only if they had them -- ). Anyway, it's very enlightening about the whole basis for physical attraction. It also tells you what to expect later on.

 

[Lexie]

There is no way the good looking women want more sex than men. The non good looking ones sometimes do.

Interestingly pessimist view. I disagree.

I agree, but its not worth it for a guy to wait 9 months, spend alot of money and time, treat her nicely, do whatever she wants so he can get sex on the 10th month and only when she is in the mood.

You're right, if what you're looking for is an easy lay.

No way, it would be more like 1 in 1000 as mentioned. Most of the guys on here do not look like or are built like firefighters or policeman. We are average joes when it comes to sex.

Actually, I've read a study like this that was done on a college campus. They had an average looking girl and guy go around and ask members of the oppositre sex to sleep with them. I think the man got about one yes in twenty.


You have a point expect for the "millionare" part. Money does not matter unless the girl is over 25 and I assume you are over 25.

You're right, I just threw that in there to emphasize my point.

 

[smooth guy]

I prefer honesty, so that might actually work for me. It's really important that he not come across as creepy or desperate, both of which are deal-breakers. And a sincere smile is a must. The thing about having a random guy come up to you is, girls are always looking out for themselves and trying to stay safe, so they have to quickly assess the guy, and if anything about him registers as "unsafe" on the meter then it's no-go. My reaction would probably be something along the lines of flattery, but it's really completely about the vibe I get from the guy.

Small talk can be helpful, but as for before or after the "line" if you will is best, I don't know that it matters much.

You also have to watch out for the situation you're in when you do an approach like this. ie, a parking garage is not the way to go.

Well said.

So what's your number?

 

[amoka]

Alright. Why do guys have to wash their hands after doing ONLY #1? Remember, nothing else was hadled in this process except a CLEANED penis.

 

[Lexie]

Alright. Why do guys have to wash their hands after doing ONLY #1? Remember, nothing else was hadled in this process except a CLEANED penis.

Personally, I'm not really hung up on it, but if someone is, I'd say it would be because of the whole uncleanliness of the bathroom....you don't know who else has touched the handle, seat, sink, etc, and with what on their hands.

 

[sexybeast]

I wish I could ask you a question I didnt already know the answer too.

Wait, wait, I got one. Do you girls get annoyed when your friend(s) come along and drag you away from a guy your sexually attacted too, and wouldnt mind spending more time with him? I.e C0ck blocks.

I always assume that the girl who gets draged away (from me) by her friend doesnt really appreciate it, but goes anyway. Why Lexie, WHY?

If I was to attempt to answer my own question I would put it down to jealousy on her friends behalf, and yes, it does annoy most girls secretly.

 

[Rebound Material]

Why do girls wear thongs/g-strings? Is it because they know guys find it a huge turn on, or for some other excuses that ive heard like "Its more comfortable"?

If so, don't you guys gotta worry about possibly leaving some sh!t stains on there?

 

[ketostix]

Lexi what's your take on direct game and what would more likely be your reaction if a guy approached you out of nowhere with something along the lines 'hey you seem interesting and I just had to get to know you.'

Let's say his looks were average but he seemed confident enough.

Or do you think some small talk before exchanging numbers would be a better approach?

I prefer honesty, so that might actually work for me. It's really important that he not come across as creepy or desperate, both of which are deal-breakers. And a sincere smile is a must. The thing about having a random guy come up to you is, girls are always looking out for themselves and trying to stay safe, so they have to quickly assess the guy, and if anything about him registers as "unsafe" on the meter then it's no-go. My reaction would probably be something along the lines of flattery, but it's really completely about the vibe I get from the guy.

Small talk can be helpful, but as for before or after the "line" if you will is best, I don't know that it matters much.

You also have to watch out for the situation you're in when you do an approach like this. ie, a parking garage is not the way to go.

Let me translate Lexie's womannese for you. "If a guy approaches me and I'm physically attracted to him then his being direct or flattering will work, and it doesn't really matter what he says as long as he's not pushy and I believe he can get other girls"

 

[Lexie]

Let me translate Lexie's womannese for you. "If a guy approaches me and I'm physically attracted to him then his being direct or flattering will work, and it doesn't really matter what he says as long as he's not pushy and I believe he can get other girls"

Actually, I meant what I said. Please don't "translate" my words for me...it sort of defeats the point of having a woman answer if you're just going to draw the same male conclusion as usual.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Actually, I meant what I said. Please don't "translate" my words for me...it sort of defeats the point of having a woman answer if you're just going to draw the same male conclusion as usual.

Pssstttt... People will only believe what they can understand.

 

[Interceptor]

I wanted to post these video only to add more perspective from the female point of view.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDbIInsA1F0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFEaJbB0SZk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kis8Y_jaHg


Ladies are welcome to add comments to it.

 

[ketostix]

Actually, I meant what I said. Please don't "translate" my words for me...it sort of defeats the point of having a woman answer if you're just going to draw the same male conclusion as usual.

Your advice is totally cliched and available a dime a dozen from any other female. If I had a dime for ever time I heard a girl say the same things you say but did something else entirely I'd be very rich. I, and any other self respecting "DJ" goes by a woman's actions, not what she says or meant.

I could've went through your post piece by piece, but it was actually offensive and sexist. You used words like "creepy" and "desperate" to describe a guy who would be nice enough and confident enough to approach a girl. This is no different if not worse than one guy saying a girl is "b!tchy" and "slutty" for blowing a him off and talking to another guy instead. Point is these words you used have no meaning other than you were either attracted to a guy's appearance and looks or you weren't.

 

[ketostix]

I wanted to post these video only to add more perspective from the female point of view.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDbIInsA1F0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFEaJbB0SZk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kis8Y_jaHg


Ladies are welcome to add comments to it.

I watched the first video so far. And in it she gave the exact opposite advice to what PU and DJ advice/wisdom would be, advice that's been known to work. What was interesting is she actually stated the "DJ" response and cautioned against it. This just proves to me a woman tell men to do the opposite of what works (the worst thing for a guy's interest) and women don't really, if even subconciously, want a guy to be at an advantage.

Some specific examples she gave:
persist even when a woman coldly shoot you down.-BS
persit in the (LJBFs zone) for even "5 years".-BS
if a woman gives LMR persist and plow.-BS

 

[Phyzzle]

Well, if it's specific questions we want, I can think of a few:

1. Lexi, have you ever had a fling/relationship with some guy who cold approached you (i.e. a guy that none of your friends knew)? How did it happen? What was the first thing he said? Something slick or something observational?

2. Have you ever been making out on a bed and then hesitated?
If so, has any man ever:
a. Ignored you to go do something else?
b. Continued to nicely cuddle with the clothes on the rest of the night?
c. Shortly tried stripping you again?

Then what happened afterwards?
(Remember, NO ONE CARES what "would work" with you. We want to know what you actually did in the past. So if this situation never happened, never mind.)

3. Have you ever cheated? Even just kissing some guy, a few days before dumping your current guy? Had you already stopped being affectionate or started ditching the current man, or was it just a spark out of the blue?

Actually, I'd love to hear from any females. (I'll repost in Mature Man if Penkitten and WaterTiger don't see it here.)

 

[Lexie]

Well, if it's specific questions we want, I can think of a few:

1. Lexi, have you ever had a fling/relationship with some guy who cold approached you (i.e. a guy that none of your friends knew)? How did it happen? What was the first thing he said? Something slick or something observational?

I wouldn't call it a fling...but one cold approach that worked with me was this guy in one of my classes just sat down next to me and started talking. He asked me simple questions, where I was from, why I was in the class, stuff like that. He got my number when he offered to teach me how to polish my boots (this was an Air Force ROTC class). I needed the help and he was apparently great at it, so it was just one of those "hey, I'll call you next time I'm going to do mine and you can come over and learn how."

So, no, nothing slick, no lines.

2. Have you ever been making out on a bed and then hesitated?
If so, has any man ever:
a. Ignored you to go do something else?
b. Continued to nicely cuddle with the clothes on the rest of the night?
c. Shortly tried stripping you again?

Yes. And I've gotten all three responses from a man.
a. made me feel bad, like I did something wrong and I didn't want to make out with him again.
b. showed that he was a great guy and wasn't just there for sex.
c. showed that he was just there for sex. At least it's honest.

Then what happened afterwards?
(Remember, NO ONE CARES what "would work" with you. We want to know what you actually did in the past. So if this situation never happened, never mind.)

After (a) or (c) I pushed him to stop. After (b) I either went to sleep or started something with him later when I felt more comfortable.

3. Have you ever cheated? Even just kissing some guy, a few days before dumping your current guy? Had you already stopped being affectionate or started ditching the current man, or was it just a spark out of the blue?

I have never cheated. I have called things off with a guy I'd been on about two dates with because I knew it wouldn't work out with him and there was someone else I knew it would work out with. I don't think you can call that cheating though because it had only been a few dates, nothing was exclusive, and it is much better to be honest to him and myself and say "hey, this isn't going to work out" before anyone gets too emotionally/physically involved.

Actually, I'd love to hear from any females. (I'll repost in Mature Man if Penkitten and WaterTiger don't see it here.)

...

 

[Lexie]

Pssstttt... People will only believe what they can understand.

Which part was confusing to you?

 

[Lexie]

Your advice is totally cliched and available a dime a dozen from any other female. If I had a dime for ever time I heard a girl say the same things you say but did something else entirely I'd be very rich. I, and any other self respecting "DJ" goes by a woman's actions, not what she says or meant.

I could've went through your post piece by piece, but it was actually offensive and sexist. You used words like "creepy" and "desperate" to describe a guy who would be nice enough and confident enough to approach a girl. This is no different if not worse than one guy saying a girl is "b!tchy" and "slutty" for blowing a him off and talking to another guy instead. Point is these words you used have no meaning other than you were either attracted to a guy's appearance and looks or you weren't.

It's great that you have so many females you can turn to for advice. I'm mainly trying to help out the guys here who don't, or those who have questions they don't want to ask a girl in person.

I did not describe the approaching male as "creepy" or "desperate". I said it's important that he not come off this way. These words do have meaning other than simple attraction: If a very attractive guy comes up to me, hits on me, and persists after I said "hey, no thanks", this could be creepy. I also have another fairly attractive male acquaintance who is, frankly, very often rude to girls and has trouble getting dates to all his frat parties. However, he continues to ask out girls who have turned him down, and has a crush on a new girl every week. This comes across as desperate.

I think one of the hardest things for guys to understand is that for girls it's not all about looks, because for many men it is. Keto, the last thing I want to do is be offensive, I'm sorry if the words I used were offensive to you. I'll try to phrase things better in the future!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Which part was confusing to you?

Now that was funny...

 

[DavenJuan]

lol...killim with kindness..

few questions....

1. have you ever been in a LTR and been emotionally attracted to another guy? if so..why do you think?

2. when you go out with your girls, majority of the time are you and your friends looking to hook up, or most of the time rather not be bothered?

3. do you personally prefer a guy to come up to you and be mr. smooth, or rather straight to the point?

4. have you ever fooled around with a guy in a relationship? if so why do you think?