Wife goes to Club/Bar

[ThunderMaverick]

Now screw your hand up into a bitter little ball and go lay a right hand right on his nose (immature jail inducing fun) .Whether he screwed her or not it still doesn’t give him the right to do what he did. They are both as much to blame as each other.

Now I know why you're called "Hithard" Lawlz.:cheer:

 

[iqqi]

OMG!! Details, girlfriend!


Your man cheated on you and introduced you to his new penis outlet?

Anyways, I'd never advise violence! It is not the mature or classy way to handle things.

Unless that biotch decides to come dance next to your table in a suggestive, "Haha, she doesn't even know, does she?" kind of manner. Then I'd advise you to let them both know that you do in fact know a few things. One of which is that your hand goes upside someone's head. I'm just saying.

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Damn. That's insulting. I take it you knew for a while that the guy was cheating or it just popped into your head? How long were you with him before you knew? Was it a serious relationship?

OH more importantly:

Did you forgive him and STAY?? Or can this all be answered in links to previous post? I feel like the national enquirer. lulz

 

[Phyzzle]

She parked at his place.

I was suspending judgement, but that detail is quite damning. They went out together. This was not a jealousy plot line power-play or a random invitation to party when she was feeling ticked. It was a date.

I don't know what I'd do. Either start quietly preparing for divorce, or start making draconian ultimatums about her future behavior that have a good chance of leading to divorce.

haha. got THAT backwards.

anyways, it was a b!tch slap. .

Girl on girl action.

 

[iqqi]

Damn. That's insulting. I take it you knew for a while that the guy was cheating or it just popped into your head? How long were you with him before you knew? Was it a serious relationship?

OH more importantly:

Did you forgive him and STAY?? Or can this all be answered in links to previous post? I feel like the national enquirer. lulz

Lol. I already told you about this. You forgot!? I probably DID leave out the violence...


And to contribute to the thread, I did stay. BIG MISTAKE, but a lesson that needed to be learned. As someone said earlier in the thread, the elephant WILL be a part of your living room the whole time.

That's why I said, one of the best things a person can do is get to a point (within themselves) where they don't need proof to get themselves out of a situation they can FEEL isn't right.

 

[hithard]

That's why I said, one of the best things a person can do is get to a point (within themselves) where they don't need proof to get themselves out of a situation they can FEEL isn't right.

Brilliant advice imo.

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Lol. I already told you about this. You forgot!? I probably DID leave out the violence...

I hardly ever keep up with my internet friend's personal lives. LAWLOL!!!

*sigh* But I guess....I'll have to dig it up.

*digs*

 

[Rumpelstiltskin]

One of important message that I learn here is about RESPECT. I have talked to my wife and I have made it clear to her that she disrespected me, and I questioned our marriage because of what she did that night.

Yep, as I stated, this is about respect and control!

...This is about two issues 1. Respect 2. Control

A wife who respects you, as a husband, would not even have thought of going to a bar or a club without you being present. And because she doesn't respect you then you have lost control; thus, she does as she pleases.

But it is not your fault, in this regard, because a woman who doesn't respect herself will expectantly not respect others. Wherein you, DJ Traveller, lay fault and hold the blame, is the fact that you have chosen a woman, as a wife, who doesn't respect you as a husband/father, i.e., leader. Do you see your blunder?

Only marry a woman who respects herself and then you'll know that she'll respect you, ....

 

[ZenGodMod]

To ZenGodMod,
I do love my wife unconditionaly, and I have been supporting her through her ups and downs, but cheating....
I am very black and white when it comes to cheating. I rather lose everything in nasty divorce than be in a marriage with an unfaithful wife. I can't control what other do, but I can do my best to stay strong and stay true to what I believe in.

Hmmm....

Everyone has their limits. Now we know yours. It is probable she cheated on, she's given you enough red flags to prove so. Even her behavior is highly suspect. She may or may not have been unfaithful, that is yet to be seen, but she done enough for you to lose faith in her. And since its pretty much black and white to you on this affair... it's pretty straight forward she has cheated on you to some level/extent. You'll never directly know.
All you have is her story and her explanation of a night you'll never witness.

Look, it happens. In one night in a flash she could sleep with anyone. Everyone knows that a married woman doesn't mean off limits. Ask Latinoman, his up for it. And all she can say "I'm a yoga instructor, i can pull my legs behind my head" and the likes of Latinoman will be definitely up for it. And that 1 to 2 hours of she is cheating on you, she can tell you the next day "i was waiting to sober up".

This whole incident even with its missing gaps is evident enough for you seek divorce. Not enough evidence yet to divorce.

Make up your mind soon. The more you listen to her story, the more plot twists it'll have till you don't know anymore. The more twists, the more likey she is hiding something.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Ok, Mr. DJ Traveler, my two cents. I have never been married or have a girl cheat (that I knew of) so I have no idea what you're going through. I have been "josh" a couple of times, though.

So for what its worth, here's my advice:

you marraige is over. you will not recover any trust.

Number one priority is to protect the kid. He is your responsibility. I mean that if she gets custody, he's gonna have a daddy of the month (see Bible-belts 450 necklace thread). so do what you gotta do to get custody. Let her cheat just so a judge will give custody to you. the keylogger has been the best advice thus far.

Number two priority is protect your wallet. Make her leave you first, if you can. that sounds evil and wicked, but all is fair in love and war. first it was love, now you are at war. nothing less. The future of you and your child is at stake. Your wife gave up all rights to both of you when she chose to do what she did.

Number three, if its possible, is after you ditch the b1tch, get a new wife that is more mature and will be a decent mom to your kid. That is more important that some girl that will give props.

and lastly, and this sounds totally and awfully fvkked up coming from a complete stranger, but thanks for posting. Those of us lucky enough to not be in your crappy situation can learn from your mistakes.

Godspeed brother, I mean that.

Taiyuu

 

[My Name is Nobody]

haha. got THAT backwards.

anyways, it was a b!tch slap.

Upside the head, homey the clown style.

Hey this just proves it.. all we have to do is beat the women and they'll stick around.

 

[KarmaSutra]

We all know she did something inappropriate. Put your posturing aside and see it for what it is.

She did it.

Now it's a game of cover up and kiss ass. What does Traveler have to do, grab the guy's bottle of mouthwash and have it tested for her dna? Smell the guys fingers?

My only hope for you, Traveler, is that you didn't kiss the b!tch when she walked in the door. Otherwise you've just sucked a d!ck by-proxy.

But it doesn't make you gay.

 

[DJ_Traveler]

More Details

Here are some details that I feel are worth mentioning since you guys heard everyting from my side of the story.

* On March 2nd, her dad called my wife and revealled to her that he is very sick and that the doctors don't think he will make it through this year.

* My wife has been complaining for the the past two months that she wanted to go out and feel like a woman in her 20s. I've been too slow to react.

* My wife only needed to classes to finish her A.A degree this semester. Next semester she will be working toward her B.A degree to be a teacher. Which is why I don't think she was taking classes just to scout for men.

*My wife tends to be naive and too trusty of people.

My wife doesn't know it, but I called my phone company and I can download every incoming/outgoing calls I will post all of them soon.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Here are some details that I feel are worth mentioning since you guys heard everyting from my side of the story.

* On March 2nd, her dad called my wife and revealled to her that he is very sick and that the doctors don't think he will make it through this year.

Sorry to hear that but it's no excuse to start living her life vicariously through other men.

* My wife has been complaining for the the past two months that she wanted to go out and feel like a woman in her 20s. I've been too slow to react.

One of STR8UP's red flags. She regrets that she isn't through her "Ho Stage".

* My wife only needed to classes to finish her A.A degree this semester. Next semester she will be working toward her B.A degree to be a teacher. Which is why I don't think she was taking classes just to scout for men.

I don't think she's that bright to have premeditated the entire rendezvoux from the beginning of school. She happened to meet a guy who gave her the attention she so craved.

*My wife tends to be naive and too trusty of people.

Brother, Don't ever mistake cunning and sly as being naive. They don't hold hands.

My wife doesn't know it, but I called my phone company and I can download every incoming/outgoing calls I will post all of them soon.

Interesting to see how many calls Josh has recieved from the mother of your child.

I'm wringing my hands in anticipation.

 

[DJ_Traveler]

Relevant calls since March 6

Date Time Number Minutes
Local Airtime, Long Distance and International Charges
From 12:27 to 12:39 after lazy argument. My phone was on silent.
3/6/2008 Outgoing 12:27 PM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 12:28 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 12:32 PM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 12:38 PM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 12:39 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes

Her class has been cancelled according to her story and she goes home to get ready. I almost could have seen my wife but I was in a meeting until 8:30pm.

3/6/2008 Outgoing 8:06 PM Josh 2 Minutes
3/6/2008 Incoming 8:09 PM Josh 8 Minutes
3/6/2008 Incoming 8:44 PM Josh 2 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 9:07 PM Josh 5 Minutes

At 9:13pm wife calls me that she is going clubbing no matter what I say. I said bye ang hung up.

3/6/2008 Outgoing 9:13 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 10:32 PM Josh 1 Minutes
3/6/2008 Outgoing 11:04 PM Josh 1 Minutes

From 11:49 to 4:40 she calls me from the bar club.

3/6/2008 Outgoing 11:49 PM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 12:43 AM DJ_Traveler 3 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 1:23 AM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 3:00 AM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 4:40 AM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/7/2008 Incoming 4:44 AM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes

3/7/2008 Outgoing 8:05 AM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 8:41 AM DJ_Traveler 7 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 11:22 AM DJ_Traveler 3 Minutes

Prince charming Josh calls wife

3/7/2008 Incoming 1:07 PM Josh 4 Minutes
3/7/2008 Incoming 2:28 PM DJ_Traveler 3 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 2:31 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 2:33 PM DJ_Traveler 4 Minutes
3/7/2008 Outgoing 4:06 PM DJ_Traveler 3 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 8:12 AM DJ_Traveler 2 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 9:03 AM DJ_Traveler 3 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 11:06 AM DJ_Traveler 4 Minutes

Lisa calls Josh yesterday regarding the club ticket which she told me at lunch wihout me having to ask. She got his voicemail

3/10/2008 Outgoing 11:13 AM Josh 2 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 11:25 AM DJ_Traveler 4 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 4:18 PM DJ_Traveler 4 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 5:16 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 5:53 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/10/2008 Outgoing 5:57 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes
3/10/2008 Incoming 6:00 PM DJ_Traveler 1 Minutes

At 7:45 I go outside with the baby to take her on a stroller ride while my wife works on her paper. My wife calls Josh and left him a voicemail.

3/10/2008 Outgoing 7:55 PM Josh 1 Minutes

I go to the library to return some stuff. Josh calls her back and says she doesn't have to pay him back the ticket since he paid for another guy called Jason a coworker. I forgot to mention him, but she did tell me on March 7th that Jason was very drunk and couldn't drive his car so he went to Josh's place as well.

3/10/2008 Incoming 9:02 PM Josh 8 Minutes

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Huh?

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Well the phone log should settle it. This is the Days of Our Lives.

 

[speed dawg]

Man, you all sure talk alot on the phone. Stay on it, Traveler. We are going to get to the bottom of this.

And tell me, what's your wife's attitude been like lately? Has she been distant? Has she been attached to your hip? Sucking your d1ck daily? And don't spin the answer. This may be critical in dealing with your issue.

 

[ZenGodMod]

Haha. You can tell from the pattern of the phone bill, she feels guilty for all those calls she makes and receives from/to josh. Cause after she makes sure she calls you.
Great PI work. The picture is becoming clearer. Keep collecting evidence. Soon you'll know the truth.

 

[Latinoman]

Charlie, no offense, but why don't you write your age in your profile? I sense your posts are going to start getting deleted as you don't sound mature enough as to be in this forum. In fact, you sound like if you were 19 or 20.

I love the way you are saying she should be a good MOTHER. She should but she's also 23 with a new baby, you can't expect her to be perfect.

The mother of my children, became a mother at age 20. NEVER had a complain of her role as a mother. I EXPECTED my ex-wife to be a PERFECT mother.

But that's me...a Man that even in my early 20s was a Man that had high expectations.

I'm sure most guys on here aren't (far from it).

I'm sure most guys on here are..MOTHERS.

Now back to the problem, she might have cheated however most women don't cheat on men they love (as opposed to men)

As a man that has been with women that have told me: "I love my husband"...as we lay naked on bed...and ready to phuck again...I am going to tell you that you are 100% wrong.

I would take stronger messures as in a divorce you will end up paying for the kid and her for the rest of your life

Listen...the purpose of my advice is to make him aware that if he does NOT prepare...he will end up phucked ($$$). Log book, documentations, etc.

- you can't simply "next" this one although the lies are worrying.

He can do WHATEVER he wants.