Well, I fvcked up...

[The Master Disaster]

It's okay. I'm doing a lot of better today. I was just studying and writing papers, but I took a break and watch some sketch videos that I did with friends from high school and college.

I was almost in tears laughing so hard. Really put me in a good mood.

I'm okay. I'm sure I'll be able to move on now.

 

[SuSHI]

So I have been following this thread as closely as the others. And Although I agree you had many chances missed, I was still rooting for you. And I still can't believe this B!tch hasn't called you back yet. I mean, even if she wasn't romantically interested in you, and thought of you as a friend, how could she not call you back? WTF. Remember to keep us all up to date. And yeah, this is a good lesson for you and all of us. My condolences.

 

[MisterMcGee]

Sometimes phonecalls and txts aren't a big enough deal to girls to worry about replying back. Even if it's a guy buddy or whatever, I've had girls not reply back and it doesn't mean anything at all.
of course, if she knows youre romantically interested, and she's choosing not to reply back, then that's not good, but I never put much weight on this realm of communication cause ti's the definition of sketchy.

 

[Sandow]

she's busy so she's probably not going to call right away. and/or she may only see you as a friend because you never made a move on her after all this time.

 

[The Master Disaster]

... she still hasn't called me back. I can't decide what's the best course of action.

I didn't tell you guys this but before I called her about 3 hours before I gave her a call. She was talking about how she hadn't been paid (she wrote a couple of articles for the paper, and I'm an editor), and I said to talk to Tim.

I went in to pick up my check, and I noticed hers, so I thought I'd be funny and send her a text to let her know. The first part is a little corny, and I would of love to reword it. You'll never guess was a lame intro.

Me: You'll never guess whose check I saw while I was getting mine. I'll give you one guess.
Her: Not mine cuz I jus picked it up 50
Me: Today?
Her: Yup
Me: Damn, you just stole all the fun. Jerk.
Her: Yea yea

I didn't know how to make sense of her attitude in the text message. I then gave her a call around 3 p.m. where she didn't answer.

So I don't know, do you think she even knows that I called? I mean it's reasonable that she didn't even know I called. I just don't want to come off as needy.

I 100% agree with MisterMcGee that it's shaky area.

Knowing the text now, what do you guys think?

 

[MisterMcGee]

"I just don't want to come off as needy."
But you ARE needy.
I know exactly how you feel, you just need to let go of this chick, even if just for a little while, before you can handle her and the entire situation properly. Your mind is clustered in a tiny little box and you feel 'stuck' and such, correct? Set yourself free for a while, then return to this situation if you feel like it and you'll hopefully deal with it calmly and naturally. You're too obsessed with getting a reaction and outcome. There's nothing wrong with taking action and getting a reaction from her, but you're doing it in an unhealthy and improper state right now, and you need to fix that before you do anything else regarding her.

 

[Igetit!]

... she still hasn't called me back. I can't decide what's the best course of action.

What do you mean you can't decide the best course of action? I thought we covered this yesterday. I said to go no contact for a bare minimum of one week. Have you forgotten that already? I said one week,but you said 2 to 3 weeks. I knew that was bull with this case of oneitis you have. But again I say one week. My guess is that she'll probably try to contact you before the week is up though,if she really likes you.

I went in to pick up my check, and I noticed hers, so I thought I'd be funny and send her a text to let her know. The first part is a little corny, and I would of love to reword it. You'll never guess was a lame intro.

Me: You'll never guess whose check I saw while I was getting mine. I'll give you one guess.
Her: Not mine cuz I jus picked it up 50
Me: Today?
Her: Yup
Me: Damn, you just stole all the fun. Jerk.
Her: Yea yea

I didn't know how to make sense of her attitude in the text message.

Can't make sense of her attitude in the text message,huh? Well I can. It's call friendship.

I then gave her a call around 3 p.m. where she didn't answer. ...I just don't want to come off as needy.

Too late. Let me see if I understand this correctly: You called her,the two of you talked about her not getting paid yet,then later on you sent her a text to which she responded,then a few hours after that,you contacted her a third time,to which this time she didn't respond,which brings us to today. Did I get all that right? If so,then the reason she hasn't yet called you back is clear. You got on her nerves calling and texting her every 3 hours.

Knowing the text now, what do you guys think?

What do I think? I think it's official. YOUR IN THE FRIENDZONE.

Next question.

 

[Tenzen]

Dude, what happen to the no contact, is it that hard to not contact her for like a week. Exactly what MisterMcGee said just let this one go. What your feeling i felt exactly the same the first time i joined this forum in 07. I kept trying to go after this one girl. My heart was crushed i felt drained of my lifeforce it was crazy. Absolutely the worst i have ever felt in my life. If it takes that to make you learn so be it, i've done a complete 180' from those times. So do yourself a favor and drop this girl ASAP and never contact her again. If she starts pursuing you after all this, then you can do what you want but for now NOOOO texts or calls doesn't matter what event you may think is good to tell her about like some check at work which back fired.... And be a 100% this time delete the number if you have to to prevent calling or texting her.

 

[CFERD]

yeah your in the Friend Zone for sure. Sounds like you got on her nerves calling and texting too much. The only call should have been to ask her out. What I don't get is why you waited so long to show romantic interest, aside from being a pvssy. Knowing how busy people get preparing and taking finals, it's probably not the best time to be trying to make up for missed opportunities. Now you say you don't even have to approach girls as they are approaching you daily and one has asked you to get a beer with you a few times. How is it your confidence takes a nose dive when it comes to making a move. I think you don't leave your comfort zone. But once you do you'll agree that it's better to make a bold move and find out where you stand than it is to wonder and analysis how she if feeling about you. I recall you saying that ou found your balls the other day. Did you loose them again?
Cause telling us your going to give her a passionate kiss with your hand on her cheek blah blah blah. Dude, your mind is feeding you romance novel sh*t.
Igetit pointed this out before. No ambience, no meteor shower. Stop thinking about the perfect moment. In fact stop thinking. Just act like a man that knows what he wants and be confident and go after it. Your head must be fried from all the wondering and frustration that you caused yourself by not going for it. Sounds like you really need to work on the your lack of courage (balls). Whether she would have been receptive to a kiss or not, surely she likes the attention you provide. Listen to the other posters and force yourself not to contact her. Like they have said, she will get curious and want to know why your not calling. Start chatting up a FEW of these girls that are approaching you, start chating up a FEW that you are going to start approaching. Now that you've learned what happens when you get her comfortable with you and wait too long, you should be much beter off from here on out. Oneitis is never a pretty site, just be grateful yours didn't come with a mindfvcking like some bpd bytches will lay on you.

 

[Jitterbug]

For some reason, this guy reminds me of Mike in Swingers.

Mate, you're a nervous wreck. The only thing you can do now, even if she's highly interested, is to fvck it up big time. Take a break from this one, find some other women to lose more sleep over, then get back to her when you get a grip on your emotions and kill some of that desperation.

 

[Stud No1]

... she still hasn't called me back. I can't decide what's the best course of action.

I didn't tell you guys this but before I called her about 3 hours before I gave her a call. She was talking about how she hadn't been paid (she wrote a couple of articles for the paper, and I'm an editor), and I said to talk to Tim.

I went in to pick up my check, and I noticed hers, so I thought I'd be funny and send her a text to let her know. The first part is a little corny, and I would of love to reword it. You'll never guess was a lame intro.

Me: You'll never guess whose check I saw while I was getting mine. I'll give you one guess.
Her: Not mine cuz I jus picked it up 50
Me: Today?
Her: Yup
Me: Damn, you just stole all the fun. Jerk.
Her: Yea yea

I didn't know how to make sense of her attitude in the text message. I then gave her a call around 3 p.m. where she didn't answer.

So I don't know, do you think she even knows that I called? I mean it's reasonable that she didn't even know I called. I just don't want to come off as needy.

I 100% agree with MisterMcGee that it's shaky area.

Knowing the text now, what do you guys think?

Buddy, buddy, buddy

I've been here. Its a sad spot to be in. Simply put, her interest level is low.

Occasionally she might do something for you to forget that or misconstrue her overall interest, but believe me, her interest is low.


Usually when i hit this point, i go off the girl myself. I mean, no call back? Cheeky *****, who does she think she is? Then i play hardball even if she starts making the effort, she disrespected/didn't care, about your interest in her, so don't take any stock of anything so does for you (if she even does).


Now, i bet you hear from her and go all afc again. But REMEMBER, the way you acted before is the reason she has a low interest level, returning to that again will yield identical results.

No matter what, don't be overly nice to her again

 

[Stud No1]

Sometimes phonecalls and txts aren't a big enough deal to girls to worry about replying back. Even if it's a guy buddy or whatever, I've had girls not reply back and it doesn't mean anything at all.
of course, if she knows youre romantically interested, and she's choosing not to reply back, then that's not good, but I never put much weight on this realm of communication cause ti's the definition of sketchy.

Yep


Truth is....IF a girl LIKES YOU, she'll always make it easy for you. Its when she doesn't like you, you have these problems.

 

[MisterMcGee]

Truth is....IF a girl LIKES YOU, she'll always make it easy for you. Its when she doesn't like you, you have these problems.

Nope, not always true. Girls are different from one another.
Of course, this has nothing to do with this guy's case - it's clear where the girls stands right now.
Just saying that, for the record and everyone else reading this, your statement of all girls who 'like you' making it 'easy for you' is incorrect and misleading.

 

[Stud No1]

Nope, not always true. Girls are different from one another.
Of course, this has nothing to do with this guy's case - it's clear where the girls stands right now.
Just saying that, for the record and everyone else reading this, your statement of all girls who 'like you' making it 'easy for you' is incorrect and misleading.

I get what you're saying, but what im saying, is theres certain ways a girl with high interest won't act, being unreceptive is generally one. There'll always be a few headcase examples of course.

 

[MisterMcGee]

Shy girls aren't headcases, lol

 

[Serg897]

Unfortunately, it seems like these guys are right.

When you first meet a girl, there is a certain window of opportunity you have to turn the relationship into something sexual (i.e., more-than-friends territory). If you don't make a move but continue to hang out with her for a while, its exceedingly difficult to recover.

I learned this the hard way last semester in the Spring, but thankfully I wasn't seriously invested in this girl and I was able to move on quickly after making the realization.

What I think needs to be done here is recognizing this fact, and moving on to other women. Go no contact for a while and see what that does. She might miss you and contact you, but more likely than not you have already reached the point of no return (the "event horizon", if you will) and her contact will only be because she misses you AS A FRIEND.

My prediction would be that if you go ahead and try to hang out with her, she wont realize what your intentions are until you try to make moves, then she will freak out. I don't know the exact dynamics of your relationship are and I could be wrong, but this is most likely the case.

Go ahead and try and see what happens, especially if you are not interested in friendship. You might get hurt, but you'll learn a valuable lesson. Just don't beat around the bush anymore if you decide to go this route. ****ing do it. Hang out with her and make moves, no matter HOW awkward it may seem. If you really want to know if she is interested in you, there is only ONE way to find out.

 

[Stud No1]

Shy girls aren't headcases, lol

Obviously you are allowed to exercise your common sense on a case-by-case basis but a girl, say, that simply doesn't reply to your texts or whatnot....well that's not shyness, thats low interest. Little to no girls are that shy and if they are they gotta be really introverted.

Even shy girls would surprise you with guys they like; ive seen so many shy girls act out of character (i.e. being really forward) when they like a guy (personal experience included) so don't kid yourself.

 

[Jitterbug]

Just saying that, for the record and everyone else reading this, your statement of all girls who 'like you' making it 'easy for you' is incorrect and misleading.

Well, if a high IL girl is making it hard for you to just contact her or ask her out, she probably has intimacy issues and you can imagine how hard it will be to sleep with her or get her to do more in bed than just lying there. She'd be the same as a low IL chick. She can bugger off.

 

[The Master Disaster]

Woah, I think some facts got misinterpreted.

I sent her that text Tuesday afternoon, and then gave her a call 3 hours later to no answer.

That's it. I haven't called her since, so I haven't broken any thing we agreed on.

It's a little rude though. A girl tells you to giver her a call after you had a blast with her, and then she doesn't pick up the phone or give a call back. Maybe I should of left a voice message because then it would remove all doubt in my mind that she may not know I even called.

But yea, I won't contact her. I'm going home Friday, so that will be good to get out of the area and clear my head from this poisonous mindset.

 

[loveorhate]

You want this girl. You really do. We all can tell, blindfolded.

well, I know how you can get her.

I've been keeping it a secret.

I have to.

It's too powerful.

It works everytime.

I could charge men $1,000 for it. And they will pay.

Can't tell you it now, though.

Gotta run.

But will return to this forum soon.

For now

here's a word of advice.

Your delusional. Your seeing interest signals from
almost every girl you encounter. . Sometimes, by reading your post, I wonder if
you have the face of a Brad Pit. Women seem to always be projecting
there interest in you way too much. Well, you know what, I ain't buying it! It's unrealistic. Not even the really good looking get those kind of interest signals. I know, I pay close attention to how women react to good looking guys aswell as ugly men. And yes, there is a difference. but only in the movies do women allow themselves to be caught looking interested in guys. Girls, from my experience, rarely publicly project their interest in other guys.

I call what you have dead-weenier syndrome. Only a few men have it.
It happens most readily in those who think they are attractive, but don't actually believe it. And who haven't got any in a long time. It's a form of
denial, really. And inactivity for your little friend. The little guys dead man!!!

You, playboy to be, have it.

But there's a cure. Anyway, I really gotta run now. So, reflect on what I have said you and if and when you come to terms with yourself and accept it, then you will automatically find remedies for it.

But why wait?

Here's the solution to dead-weenier syndrome: Approach 21 women everyday for 21 days. What you say doesn't matter. A simple "hi" will do. You'll see they'll trim your ass down to size and bring you back to reality. You've been blowing your own ego. Soon, after faithfully following my advice, you'll have a HEALTHY, REALISTIC self-esteem.

good luck.

the way things have been going for you, you'll need it.