Well, I fvcked up...

[The Master Disaster]

Thanks for the praise old man. always good to know I'm getting more and more people to ride my sacks.

As for the disaster, you fuking suck.
No you don't suck, you just lack courage and experience.


The problem with waiting is that she could meet another guy who she does find attractive and who acts on this.

once she's attracted to another guy, and if he sticks around and is someone who she likes as a person aswell, she'll begin to form feelings for him. Once this happens, she'll quite looking at other guys. Why should she, she's already getting the security that she craves./QUOTE]

^^^The reason we've been telling Master to kiss her now. Not only because of the competion factor, more importantly, we don't want to see him stuck in the FZ because he waited too long

But the most important reason; the longer he puts it off the more he builds it up in his head, suddenly it becomes extremely challenging, complicated and anxiety producing for him to perform the simplest task of kissing her.

Given all the circumsances, he needs to make a move now before it's too late.
Maybe my advice is crap, but I think based on everything he's told us, it seems to be the best fit for his situation. Unless of course Master wants to be her friend, and doesn't really want to kiss her...IDK

So you're saying, set up another date during the week and move in on her.

I can see why. What would be some good places to take her?

I honestly appreciate everything you guys have said. Man, it's like having coaches to do tell me to do this route or run this play. Haha, it's really helped me out. I'm so close to that endzone. [/lame sports analogy]

I can see how acting now would really boost my chances and further that momentum. So what call her Tuesday to set something up on Wednesday?

 

[MisterMcGee]

You want to be her lover.
Just remember that.

Lover. You want to see her and remember the great time you had in bed a couple nights, not how she laughed at one of your jokes a couple weeks back and might like you.

 

[slaog]

MD I don't think you're in the friend zone. I doubt the date would have lasted 5 hours if she thought of you as just a friend. Also you seem to be confident that she likes you. Trust your gut feelings.


Don't be afraid to show her you're interested in her as more then a friend. Also theres no need to knock her off her pedestal because she isn't on one. Don't put her on one though.

 

[loveorhate]

These guys are talking to you like parents who are afraid to break your feelings, so they encourage you and tell you to go by the fuking book.

Well, fuk the book!

The bible's (and Im not talking about the Don Juan Bible, whatever that is) was written so people can follow a few rules to live in harmony and achieve a certain level of happiness in their lives, but whether you like to believe it or not, the most successful DO NOT follow all the rules.

This is why you must reject the notion these guys are giving you

which one?

To continue doing what you're doing and hope for the best. That you're doing a good job even though YOU ARE NOT.

These two kids I talked about barely knew each other. You know how I could tell? The girl asked the guy where he was from, yet she behaved as if she knew the guy. This is what they do (generally and from my experience and observation only) when they like a guy. This is what my ex did with me. She acted as if we knew each other. I honesty couldn't tell she was attracted to me until hinted over and over again she wanted to go out.

I can't give you personal advice becuase I was not there when you two met. I did not see her behavior. And I don't know if what you are saying is tainted by your obviously intense desire to get this girl. Emotions, especially infatuation (kind a seems like you may be infatuated), can effect your judgment and cause you to see what you want to see.

BUT this is what I think you MUST do:

You Have to----absolutely need to---- find out if she is attracted to you BEFORE you go in for the kiss.

If you do not, you risk sabotaging your friendship (yes, currently, whether you'd like to believe it or not, what you to have going on, is, a friendship) aka, making is almost impossible to seducer her thereafter.

How?

Do this:

Put her on YOUR schedule like I suggested you do.

or,
alteast,

don't ask her out. let her do the inviting.

if she likes you, she'll want to see you again.

And put a pretzel in your panties

just joking

that's for later.

 

[Igetit!]

You know what Master Disaster? This guy Loveorhate knows what he's talking about. I read what he said he thinks you should do,and I think it's pretty good advice. He may be new to the forum,but he's not new to the game. I don't know where he got the idea that I was trying to sugar-coat my replies to you,but other than that,I think you may be able to learn a few things from the guy.

Now personally,I think you're in the friendzone with this girl. I think you've been there for some time. If you disagree,then answer me thiso you feel or sense any type of romantic/sexual chemistry from her? Any? Be honest man. Don't give me a fake answer because you don't want to be wrong,or because you're trying to protect your ego. Be 100% truely honest. If the answer is no,it doesn't mean all is lost. It just means that there are some other things you need to do,but if you're not honest about where you're at,then the forum won't be able to help you get where you want to be.

 

[The Master Disaster]

Do I feel that she has given me any romantic/sexual chemistry towards me?

Honestly, that is a hard question for me to answer, and that is a terrible sign. I know there is definitely between us, and I know she's attracted to me. Times at the date where I missed my opportunities to advance:

-There was this head massager that she said "made her horny," and I could of said or done something, but I couldn't think of one at the time.

-She held her purse in her opposite arm every time we walked around and had her hand hang right next to mine. I just couldn't grab it.

-She said her back hurt as I was giving a ride back at a stoplight. I should stuck my hand on her lower back and rubbed a little and said "better?"

However, I think... I know she's waiting for me to make that first step towards romance. I mean she and I get along really well and have a blast, but I completely agree with you guys. If I'm not already in the friend zone, I'm heading straight towards there.

I know I have one more chance to change this, but that's where I need help.

I realized today much of my anxiety towards her as been alleviated. To tell you the truth, if I saw her tonight I would kiss her without hesitation. I am much more confident than yesterday. I did a little shopping, and I could easily tell the difference by the various women's reactions to me.

--I think a big downer on me is my roommates. I have three. 1 roommate is gay. The other two haven't had a girlfriend in their lives. Every time they talk about women; I swear it's like looking in a mirror back when I was in the 8th grade. There is nothing manly or alpha about them. Everything they say is wishy washy and flimsy.

Now as for the advice Loveorhate said; I don't think she would give me a call if I didn't. She said as she was getting out of my car, "Give me a call later on this week. We'll get together again."

So obviously she wants me to call her, but if I don't then she will move on. That's my honest opinion. I think she's growing tired of waiting, and if I don't act NEXT TIME like and make it overtly obvious. I will be there for good.

Something clicked in me today. I don't know what, but I don't see her as a goal. I see her as just another person who I want to make out with.

I think I have a couple things going for me.

-I'm sure I'm on her mind tomorrow around 11 o'clock because we've talked about that professor together (we make jokes about her), and I've told her my best friend is in that class (whom she dislikes because he's loud, but he doesn't have trouble getting laid), we also use to meet at 12 every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. So that hour, she'll probably relive that date. I know how she works.

-Right after our date, she went to an all-girl passion party (women get together and play around with sex toys), which may of even furthered the
association of myself and pleasure.

-Probably couple more, but I don't really care. I've over thought everything to death.

Right now, I just want to get with her and fornicate, no joke. I couldn't care less about what we talked about.

I hope I can keep this mindset. It's probably the perfect remedy for my situation.

It's just stupid how I'm having these women problems. I mean I'm good looking, bi-lingual (English and French), I play the guitar and piano. I am incredibly intellectual, I'm known as the funniest person people know. I drive, wear, own nice things... yet I have this damn intimacy problem that hinders EVERY DAMn ONE OF THOSE. This is just ridiculous. I have grown so much since I've come to college 3 years ago, and I've had this damn problem my entire life. God, it pisses me off, and if it screws up another relationship.. I can't let that happen.

It ends this week. I'm gonna get defeat this crap; I'm sick of putting up with it.

-------------
Tuesday, before 4 p.m. I'm going to give her a call. Tell her to be ready by 6 p.m. Then I'll pick her up and surprise her to go somewhere romantic. I don't know somewhere where we can be alone and talk and be close. Hold her hand then when the mood strikes (before the end of the date) kiss her.

She retracts. Move on. It's not worth it.
She reciprocates. Continue. See where it goes.

I don't care if what she thinks anymore; I got one more chance to prove her that I have balls, and I'm not gonna mess that up.

Aight, that's my rant.

 

[Igetit!]

Do I feel that she has given me any romantic/sexual chemistry towards me?
Honestly, that is a hard question for me to answer, and that is a terrible sign.

A hard question to answer,huh? Well,you NEED to answer it. You've certainly been around her long enough to know whether there is a romantic interest on her part or not. It should be obvious. The mere fact that you don't know after all this time speaks volumes to me,although on some level,I get a feeling that in reality,that you ALREADY know the answer in your heart.

-She held her purse in her opposite arm every time we walked around and had her hand hang right next to mine. I just couldn't grab it.

-She said her back hurt as I was giving a ride back at a stoplight. I should stuck my hand on her lower back and rubbed a little and said "better?"

I honestly don't know if this means anything or not. My guess is that you're thinking too much,trying to analyze every little detail in order to figure out your next move,like a game of chess. THIS IS BAD. It's bad because it means that you're reacting to her. It puts her in control.

However, I think... I know she's waiting for me to make that first step towards romance.

Where the heck did you get this from? What in the world gave you this impression? I asked you if you think there is any romantic/sexual interest for you on her part,and you couldn't answer that,but somehow you think she's waiting for you to take the first step of romance towards her? You KNOW that doesn't make any sense,don't you?

To tell you the truth, if I saw her tonight I would kiss her without hesitation.

I seriously doubt this. If it took you two months and 500 replies to two threads to move you to ask her out,I don't see the confidence in you to just flat out kiss her. You don't know if she has any romantic feelings towards you yet,but you'd kiss her without hestitation. Oh please.

She said as she was getting out of my car, "Give me a call later on this week. We'll get together again."

This sounds like a girl talking to one of her girlfriends. I'm sorry man,but it does.

-Right after our date, she went to an all-girl passion party (women get together and play around with sex toys), which may of even furthered the
association of myself and pleasure.

Now you're scaring me. Once again,you don't know if she has any interest in you,but you think she's associated this "passion party" with you. Oooook.

-Probably couple more, but I don't really care. I've over thought everything to death.

You got that right.

Tuesday, before 4 p.m. I'm going to give her a call. Tell her to be ready by 6 p.m. Then I'll pick her up and surprise her to go somewhere romantic.

Well,I have a suggestion. This will help you find out where this girl's head's at reguarding being interested in you without having to try to hug her or kiss her. Go ahead and call her like you said you were going to do,and set up the date and everything. Then while you're setting everything up,tell her to wear something nice....FOR YOU. Do that,then watch her response. This should let you know if she's interested in you or not.

 

[The Master Disaster]

... I thought you asked me if she made any romantic advances on me.

The answer is yes. She has shown a ton of romantic interest, but I just haven't physically capitalized on it.

I'm telling you bro. I'm much more confident. It doesn't matter if you believe it or not.

I'm finding my balls. I guess I must of forgot where they were.

I played a lot of guitar today and did bunch self-reflection. I realized how much I was devaluing myself. She should be so lucky for me to like her.

I swear next time I'm with her; it will be a whole other scenario. Got the first date out of the way, and she's going to see me in all my glory. Fvck it. I'm not gonna be her jester. I won't stop cracking jokes, but I'm not holding back.

If she doesn't like it, there are other fish in the sea, and I'm not gonna waste my time fishing on something that I catch.

It's time to be a man.

 

[MisterMcGee]

I believe you, master disaster. I get that feeling too at times, the whole "wtf am i doing" feeling. Things get simple when you realize this **** really is easy once you're a good dude.

 

[slaog]

These guys are talking to you like parents who are afraid to break your feelings, so they encourage you and tell you to go by the fuking book.

Well, fuk the book!

The bible's (and Im not talking about the Don Juan Bible, whatever that is) was written so people can follow a few rules to live in harmony and achieve a certain level of happiness in their lives, but whether you like to believe it or not, the most successful DO NOT follow all the rules.

This is why you must reject the notion these guys are giving you

which one?

To continue doing what you're doing and hope for the best. That you're doing a good job even though YOU ARE NOT.

So you're right and everybody else is wrong including the D bible? If you feel MD is getting bad advice then feel free to debate it.

There are many ways at looking at each situation and just because you see things one way doesn't mean thats the only way.

 

[MattS]

Omg dude yea u need some balls big time. Having all the nice sh1t isn't woth it unless u got someone to share it with. I see u in me how I was years ago. Im good looking got nice sh1t and well educated. Beofre I was scared. I was like wtf I havee everything except a gf. I mean I've gotten ion girls all were good looking, but I wanted to be a man wh0re and not a push over with women. Cause I was it all my relationships ended cause of that. That's how u r right now. I just watched mystery dvds over and over and over. That sh1t drilled into my head and my mindset is so different its not even funny. I was afc but now its a different story. Trust me watch the dvds and ur mindset will change plus u will be a lot better at the game. His sh1t is no joke.

 

[DJ#7436]

Igetit is all over this...your in the friend zone. I'll admit you proved me wrong when you say you kissed her and she didnt pull back. Until then, nothing else you say will convince me otherwise. Not being negative, just realistic. You should have conveyed your sexual interest from the start, now its going to be awkward.....but at least you'll know for next time.

Dj

 

[The Master Disaster]

Tomorrow, I'm going to give her a call around 3 or 4 to see if she's doing anything around 6. I'm pretty sure she'll be free if not then whenever, but what I want to do is take her to a quiet romantic restaurant and move the conversation to things that will get me out of the friend zone (if I'm in it).

Towards the end of the meal, I was to say something like, "[Name], why am I so attracted to everything about you."

Lay that romance chit cat down. Hopefully, get a kiss before we even leave the restaurant.

I'm not really worried with her not being into me because I thought about it last night, and I realized almost everything we did Saturday was more than what friends would do. She lost track of time while we were down there, so obviously she was having fun. I'm just going to capitalize on it.

Then after do whatever afterwards. I just have to choose the right restaurant.

I'm not worried. I think some of you guys are convincing me that I'm not a man, I'm too slow, I'm not forceful enough, and that may hold some truth but not tomorrow.

I think what's really helping me is going from me needing her to me wanting her. Subtle, but it has quite a big change in my attitude.

She's gonna be in for a trip. It's time to decide if there is something between us or if I should move on and find a girl who is everything I'm looking for.

By tomorrow night, she won't have a doubt in her mind how I feel about her. I'm going to make my intentions extremely clear.

 

[MisterMcGee]

NO NO NO
When we say be romantic and crap, we don't mean do afc-ish romantic crap. We mean be sexual and physical and manly. You can do this stuff wherever

you're right, i think, that things are alright where they are. just cause she had fun doesn't mean youre in the friend 'zone'. its likely she's thinking itd be cool if you two could escalate, but the job is yours my friend. you need to escalate.
escalating isn't "bring her someplace romantic". That's awkward. What you guys did last time was fine. it wasnt the activity that stunted your ability to capitalize on your desire for her, it was YOU. So as long as youve got that sorted out and want to become her lover, not her entertainer, then you can 'escalate' wherever you want and however you want.
Put your arm around her, look her in the eyes, and kiss-test her (hand on her cheek or hair). If things feel right, kiss her.
Do
It

 

[The Master Disaster]

NO NO NO
When we say be romantic and crap, we don't mean do afc-ish romantic crap. We mean be sexual and physical and manly. You can do this stuff wherever

Where should I take her? I want to take her somewhere with a nice ambience...

 

[MisterMcGee]

Where should I take her? I want to take her somewhere with a nice ambience...

imo, as long as its you and her and you're looking into her eyes and she's responding well, then that's all the ambiance she needs. I think what youre looking for is an ambiance that will make things easier for you... or at least 'excusable'. Like "we're at a restaurant, its romantic, why shouldnt i make a move?"

 

[Tenzen]

Not to sound even more negative, but this has to become a lost cause. I dunno what it is but based on this whole thread the master disaster you have a major inner game problem. The only way your going to learn how to fix this problem is by allowing it to go as your planning it. You'll see first hand why it failed. You need to listen to the advice of the ppl on this forum. Whats this on a places ambiance you need ambiance now to kiss her? Damn dude you have an excuse for everything, you keep saying you'll fix it next week by taking her here or asking her to go here.Now a romantic date? what for? why are you rewarding her!!!!!? did she have sex with u last weekend? no she didn't even kiss you. More Rewards = less pssuy. Failure i hope will show you everything you lacked because if this continues on with your mindset and you do actually get something i'd say your very lucky. I'd say invite her over or go to her house watch a movie just a suggestion do what you will cheers

 

[Igetit!]

Where should I take her? I want to take her somewhere with a nice ambience...

imo,as long as its you and her and you're looking into her eyes and she's responding well,that's all the ambience she needs.

I agree with MisterMcGee. All you need to be sucessful is YOU. That's it. I hate it when guys do this,it's such a misuderstanding. You don't seem to get it when it comes to dating. The "date",is You. It's the two people involved,not the movies,or a nice dinner,or a walk in the park. It's YOU who makes or breaks the date,not the place you went,or the activity you did.
Stop looking for external things,such as restaurants with "ambience",warm summer nights with star filled skies,or any other Hollywood movie scripted idea of romance you can think of. If she doesn't like you,if she doesn't feel any passion,chemistry,or attraction for you,then it won't matter where you take her.

Tomorrow,I'm going to give her a call around 3 or 4 to see if she's doing anything aruond 6. I'm pretty sure she'll be free if not then whenever,but what I want to do is take her to a quiet romantic restaurant and move the conversation to things that will get me out of the friendzone(if I'm in it).

Now this is just sad. How long have you been here? Three and a half,almost four years,and you haven't figured this one out yet? Master Disaster,there is NO WAY OUT of the friendzone. You say you want to move the conversation to a place where you'll be able to get out of the friendzone if you're in it. Well,if you're in it,you can forget it. The friendzone is like a blackhole in space. Nothing,and I mean NOTHING can escape it. You better just hope you're not there. Personally,I think you've been there since the beginning of this thread,almost a month ago(and even before then).

Hey if I'm wrong,I'll get my spoon and fork ready for a big helping of humble pie,but from everythig you've described,yeah,it looks like the friendzone has claimed you as its latest victim.

 

[MisterMcGee]

I wouldn't say that. It seems like, to me, this girl is crushing on him but he's not really doing anything about it. So yes, he'll seep into the friend zone soon.
Just my input

 

[loveorhate]

So you're right and everybody else is wrong including the D bible? If you feel MD is getting bad advice then feel free to debate it.

listen qeek (and I know you want to correct my spelling)

Im not here to debate

Im here to give you my wisdom on how to date

and if your lucky,

how to mate

like an animal

so your the one who says "easy with the compliments. they're getting old"