The smoothest thing you ever said to a woman!

[sodamnsmooth]

Just looked at a girl that walked into an elevator, she smiled, I smiled and we started kissing. Crazy as hell

 

[5string]

Wanna see where the horse bit me? Note.....be prepared to follow through if she says yes

 

[ShiftyShaun]

Was at a club and was approached by an HB I knew. After small talk-
HB: So how many girls have you got with tonight player?
Me: (in a ****y tone) I've lost count to be honest (hadn't got with any yet)
HB: So you can't even remember their names??
Me: No, but I won't forget yours... and I pulled in

 

[Powerofmindset]

I want to keep this alive so i'll post something that happend to me just this past week.

while in the car kissing...
Me: (pulls away) you kiss like my mom
HB: (stunned but she knows that stupid line has used up)
Me: (bedroom voice) here...let me show you how to kiss... (lean in with my hand on her face and just start going at it)

days later she even said it was smooth. Guess it's all about the delivery. Def not the smoothest thing i've done but it's the newest.

 

[sux2bu]

Just looked at a girl that walked into an elevator, she smiled, I smiled and we started kissing. Crazy as hell

Did the same thing at a nightclub once (not in an elevator) and the guys I were with could NOT believe what I did. Alcohol can either be liquid courage or stupidity.

 

[PokerStar]

her: you think you are all that, dont you.
me: not all that, but some it.

 

[ls9076]

I was at the bar with my Pops last week and this young HB7 was serving us drinks. She was being flirtatious and even said something to my Pops (he's a regular at this bar) along the lines of, "So do you have any other handsome sons". To which I replied, "Nope, I'm the only one".......later on she revealed she had a bf.

As I was leaving I walked up to her and said, "Since you're already taken, are there any other cute single girls that work here?". She turned bright red and told me how sweet I was, and told me she would see what she could do.

 

[sandy]

thats the spirit

thats the spirit

 

[double x]

Junior year of high school, hooking up with a freshman at a party...she was giving me a handjob. I had a stroke of genius and said 'it would have been over by now if you just used your mouth' with a huge smile. She looked at me with the utmost disgust then gave me my first *******. Most memorable because of the result, if I remember more I'll post em.

 

[Londonman09]

I worked with a girl named Virginia who use to flirt playfully with me about 6 or 7 years ago..

One day in the back of the store I leaned over to her..
me: "hey whats better than being in the heart of Texas?"
her: confused look... "what?"
me: " 9 inches in Virginia" and I gave her a grin..

The look on her face was priceless and I thought I might have gone too far... but couple weeks later when I came home from work she was hanging out with my roomate (fellow coworker" ... and literally threw a condom in my lap, got up.. and walked to my bedroom. She was maybe a 7.5 blonde with a great ass... kinda wish Id run into her again

 

[old_skoolr]

Great thread, some real classics here,

im 21 talking to this girl who was 26 on fb

her: blah blah how old are you?
me: 21 urself?
her: im 26 :S
me: so? ur gna stop talking to me just coz im younger
her: (you can tell she was thrown off guard) no hun of course not, coffee soon?

got her number and slept with her on the first date

this ones abit childish but got to her real good

her: one of these days im gonna kill you
me: really?
her: yep, wherever u are in the world i will make sure i find you and kill you
me: wow......i never knew i meant that much to you

doesnt seem like much but the reality was she lost all power in the convo, and the fact i delivered it so simply like i wasnt even paying attention to what she was saying really got to her.....she went crazy red though haha
didnt get a chance to go out with her though another regret.

 

[double x]

I was with one of my best friends last night, told me this great line he uses, with a typical situation

-He was at a house party
-Flirting/Drinking with this other girl
-She was flirting, but acting standoffish everytime he suggested they go somewhere
-He finally said "look how drunk you are, you're no use to me now" a bit condescendingly
-She looked him dead in the eye, and said "carry me upstairs and find out"

 

[SupaPowa]

No no I got one!...ehm...

Hey...Are your parents retarted? Cause you look very special!

*Note that I haven't really tried this....I'd be 6 feet under if I had...no 12!! No...ummm...24 FEET!!! (Continues for a while)

 

[kello]

I was with a girl and behind her was a mirror, looking i her eyes and than looked away and said: "Wow, what a beautiful woman." Than she look back and say: "Where?" and than i say "right there." point to her reflex on the mirror.

She loved it

 

[tsarquise]

I think I was in Hot Topic and this fine girl that worked there comes up to me and asks:

"Hey do you need help finding anything?"

I replied:

"No because I just found you..."

The girl melted!! Her guard was completely destroyed and she had this huge grin on her face! I felt sooooo smooth!

 

[tsarquise]

Great thread, some real classics here,

im 21 talking to this girl who was 26 on fb

her: blah blah how old are you?
me: 21 urself?
her: im 26 :S
me: so? ur gna stop talking to me just coz im younger
her: (you can tell she was thrown off guard) no hun of course not, coffee soon?

got her number and slept with her on the first date

this ones abit childish but got to her real good

her: one of these days im gonna kill you
me: really?
her: yep, wherever u are in the world i will make sure i find you and kill you
me: wow......i never knew i meant that much to you

doesnt seem like much but the reality was she lost all power in the convo, and the fact i delivered it so simply like i wasnt even paying attention to what she was saying really got to her.....she went crazy red though haha
didnt get a chance to go out with her though another regret.

lol Man I wouldn't call any of this smooth.... But hey what do I know?

 

[6sobczaa]

At a party, and the girl I liked was there. She actually had a really neat colored eyes (but any girl will reply to what I said)

*After talking about her vacation...
Me: I have a question...What color do you consider your eyes? I can't put my finger on it.
Her: I have changing eyes, there blue but they sometimes turn green.

So a few days later we meet up again, we're drinking and I use the lets play the name game technique.

Me: Ill say a letter, and you say something that comes to your mind.
Her: okay (a bit standoffish)
Me: K (knowing her name start with a K)
Her: Kelsey!! (obviously enthused to talk about herself)
Me: ..Chameleon
Her: *short pause*.... Chameleon doesn't start with a K!
Me: Changing eyes
Her: *blushing...good memory.

 

[European-DJ]

Me; "Damn.. Leaving alredy? i didn't even get the chance to flirt with you.
Her; Gigles "Bad huh'".
Me; "yeah, too bad, ask for my number and we can flirt".

Done deal, she asked for my number, and texted me a bit later - (she is my gf atm)

 

[kidsmooves]

so i met this shortyy the other day, got her number, called her up like...

what you doooin
she said nothiin
i said whats good
she said not much
i said guess what
she said wats up
i said i think we should hook up
she said uhh
i say what
she say but
i say but? why u stuck?
she said f*ck
i said who
she said you know
i know what?
you know who
i said i do?
she said you do
i said i do but i really don't because its you that i really want. we can do what you really want. girl we grown. and if he aint gonna treat you rightt then i aint gonna treat you wrong. thats my word. she done heard so many lies, she dont know whats true or not. shortyy like a valet service i swear she been thru a lot but i park her car in place and never let her cry alone. i listen to her heart beat because it plays my favorite song

 

[BeLoSH]

some of these are beyond cheesy and i would avoid.