The smoothest thing you ever said to a woman!

[gordiepoopy]

"Hey get over here!"
*grabs her hand + pulled her over+she feels my ===D rub against her*
her: mmmmm...
*makeout*

 

[Count Chocola]

One of Azudragon's favorites is

Her: I can't figure you out, your so bad!
Him: " Yeah, That's what she said"


One of my favorites is

Her: I only date vegetarians and environmentalists.
Me: So i can't eat your pusssy then, well thats good to know. Bye.
Her: No, thats not what i meant.... +makeout+

 

[Credos]

"Ya, but I'm seeing some one right now."
"Its ok, I'm not jealous."

should be:
her: "Ya, but I'm seeing some one right now."
you: "Me? ..."
Her: "No i mean I have a boyfriend..."
You *Pats her on the shoulder* "thats okay, I have many social friends, i can introduce you, whats your number?"

 

[slickaz]

slickaz

 

[OTB]

slickaz

So that's suppose to be your opener?

You just came up to her and uttered the word: "slickaz"

 

[saturos]

slickaz

IM GOING GAY FOR YOU

 

[Darth]

"Yeah I make a lot of money."

 

[doback]

It was Valentines Day and my High School had a couple of kids who ran a little business to deliver Valentine's roses. Naturally, I chose to have one delivered to a girl I had my eye on for quite a while and had already asked her out once but was politely told "No, let's keep it at friends".

But hey I'm a persistent budding Don Juaner and one "No" doesn't throw me off the girl. So these kids they went up and delivered the rose, the card attached to the rose said, "For the message, please call..."

So that night she called, she knew it was me (because she had my number already) and she laughed and said, "Thanks for the rose but I'm waiting to hear the message" so I told her to walk over to the nearest mirror.

When she got there I told her to "Hold the rose up to her face and look in the mirror" so she did and then I said the following words as smoothly and as sexily as I could "That's right, girl. You show the rose what the meaning of 'true beauty' really is" and guys, she melted into a stunned silence and her very next words were "What are you doing tomorrow night?"

$wEeT!

Your ****ing brilliant my friend, a girl I likes birthday is coming up, perhaps I will use that line... if you don't mind.

 

[Aragon034]

Your ****ing brilliant my friend, a girl I likes birthday is coming up, perhaps I will use that line... if you don't mind.

here's a tip, for any spanish girls you game, bring them a flower and put it in her hair. the conversation should go something like this.

you: *puts flower in her hair* "Ah there you go, now you look more beautiful"
her: "aww... stop it, you're embarrassing me..."
You: *look to her* "what? I'm not talking to you, i'm talking to the flower"
her: *melts*

one of the first canned lines i used, don't use it as much anymore but if it's a younger lass it works WONDERS.

 

[pjtheman]

I swear I couldn't belive this one worked:

Me: stand still for a second i'm testing something
Her: okay......
(i sniff the air a couple of times)
Me: yep the air definetly smells sexier next to you

 

[MAN_OF_TOMMOROW]

"Baby pass the vaseline, let me fvck ya butt....It's not that delirious" - There are actually some REALLY FREAKY girls out there!

 

[Pegador]

The first time I went out at a bar with this girl, when we asked for the bill, she said she would paid for her drinks. I said that I asked her out, so I would pay, and the next time, she could ask me out and pay...
But nothing done... She put her money on the table and put away her purse...
Well... I paid!
But I palmed her note, and before we got in the car to go away, as we were standing and kino stuff, I put this money note on her rear pocket (as I touched her as*!).
When I got home (she was at hers), I send a message:
"Look at your rear pocket..."
And she replyed:
"Wow, I dont believe... Next time I will pay..."

Well... today she is may girlfriend.

 

[eaglez1177]

Ive only got two smooth moves so far (hey im only 18 lol)

1. I was at a small party and this chick I had been gaming for the past few days is saying goodbye to me. The night had kinda been a bust cuz I was trying hard to get the hookup, but she was just wasnt givin it she wud only flirt.

Me: Alright cya later Dana
Her (turning her cheek): I dont get a kiss on the cheek goodbye?
Me: No...I dont do kisses on the cheek, I only do real ones.

I went right in and we wound up hooking up.

2. This was the first time I had hung out with my ex-gf since we had broken up two months earlier.

Me (moving in really close): Be honest, how badly do you want to fvck right now?
Her: Really badly

That was a nice lay

 

[Berlex]

"Nice shoes...wanna fvck?" I was railing her from behind 10 minutes later.

 

[eaglez1177]

This actually just happened to me last week lol...I was chillin with these girls and one of em was just non stop very obviously checking me out

HB (talks to friends, blah blah, then comes over to me): So whats your name i've never seen you before
Me: What does it matter?
HB (confused): Umm because I want to know who you are
Me: I'm the guy that you've been undressing with your eyes for the past ten minutes
HB (shocked/embarassed/smiling/speechless): N-no I havent!
Me: Yes you have babe

Got the makeout shortly after

 

[bluenorther]

I got one of the ladies where I work to start verbally abusing me, instead of trying to kiss up to me with compliments and sh*t. I'm not interested in her at all.
One day, I passed her and the woman I really have it for, and I said to my crush, "S___, did hear the language B___ has been using on me?"
S___ admitted that she'd heard some of it.
So, I asked her, "Well, how come YOU never talk to me like that?"
I think she was too stunned to answer; she just hurried away.

 

[46and2aheadofme]

Girl at party who I never met before: "Hey I really like your shirt!"

Me: "I like yours....we should trade"

Girl: "Okay"

Me: "Alright follow me"

She followed me to my room and we both took our shirts off and started making out.

 

[Hurt No More]

Going to ask out this girl who already has a boyfriend
HB: But I already have a boyfriend...
ME: I have a goldfish (said quickly)
HB: What??
Me: Oh I thought we were talking about **** that doesn't matter.

The reaction was priceless

 

[ElCubanito13]

wow gotta remember that one..

 

[TriniBoySmooth]

Going to ask out this girl who already has a boyfriend
HB: But I already have a boyfriend...
ME: I have a goldfish (said quickly)
HB: What??
Me: Oh I thought we were talking about **** that doesn't matter.

The reaction was priceless

I was about to use this one on a girl in school but not even five minutes ago she became a fan of the group named after this line!! lol