The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[will123]

Anything but compliance is flaky. Anything but a flat out yes is a no or flaky. When you dont get a straight answer. When they cancel. When they make excuses. When they dont comply.

When they jack you around looking for attention all the time and suddenly vanish when you try to make plans.

Calling out their behaviour is a waste of time. You absence will speak louder than any words you could use. If it doesn't then your presense meant nothing to them in the first place.

What distinguishes for you the difference between NC and permanently nexting her? For example if she contacted you after x weeks of NC and gVe definite date to meet up, what would make you still think "next" as opposed to "cool, we get to gather and I'll smash her" attitude. It is boundaries, disrespect, the number of chances already given etc. Where does no amount of begging still equal "I'm still gone".

 

[MountainSlide]

Where does no amount of begging still equal "I'm still gone".

When her presence in your life reduces the quality of it more than it adds.

 

[dude99]

What distinguishes for you the difference between NC and permanently nexting her? For example if she contacted you after x weeks of NC and gVe definite date to meet up, what would make you still think "next" as opposed to "cool, we get to gather and I'll smash her" attitude. It is boundaries, disrespect, the number of chances already given etc. Where does no amount of begging still equal "I'm still gone".

For me when i go NC it is always a permanent next. No exceptions. For me it is one chance per lifetime. If they mess that up it is permanent next. Always. This cuts down on flaking, disrespect, and overall bad behaviour that 95% of women feel they are entitled to dish out. Trust me. If a woman knows you have boundaries and knows you have zero fear of standing your ground they wont be as much in a hurry to push these boundaries, disrespect you and act flaky towards you. So NC is just that. They can't reach out because i wont let them. They are blocked on every avenue. They are history and they know they cant reach out. They know there is no second chance.

However some use NC to get an ex back. I don't. Once a break up happens it is total tschűss !! Goodbye. No matter who does the dumping, dead is dead. It is done. No second chances. I have even had Gf in the past as for second chances and my answer has always been the same. No.

Well you had said she flaked on you even after reaching out to you. This is nothing but a time wasting AW. After reaching out and then flaking again is a permanent 100% never have anythig to do with her ever again next. Stop wasting your time. Stop thinking of "one last smash," she is counting on you thinking this way and she will use that against you to boost her ego and hurt you.

 

[Rawksteddy]

Day 10 NC. Haven’t been thinking about her much. But she was in my dream last night which was kind of annoying. Feeling much much better. Life is pretty good. Think I need to lay off the drinking though

 

[will123]

For me when i go NC it is always a permanent next. No exceptions. For me it is one chance per lifetime. If they mess that up it is permanent next. Always. This cuts down on flaking, disrespect, and overall bad behaviour that 95% of women feel they are entitled to dish out. Trust me. If a woman knows you have boundaries and knows you have zero fear of standing your ground they wont be as much in a hurry to push these boundaries, disrespect you and act flaky towards you. So NC is just that. They can't reach out because i wont let them. They are blocked on every avenue. They are history and they know they cant reach out. They know there is no second chance.

However some use NC to get an ex back. I don't. Once a break up happens it is total tschűss !! Goodbye. No matter who does the dumping, dead is dead. It is done. No second chances. I have even had Gf in the past as for second chances and my answer has always been the same. No.

Well you had said she flaked on you even after reaching out to you. This is nothing but a time wasting AW. After reaching out and then flaking again is a permanent 100% never have anythig to do with her ever again next. Stop wasting your time. Stop thinking of "one last smash," she is counting on you thinking this way and she will use that against you to boost her ego and hurt you.

Okay. Great help. What is AW by the way?

I am about to read The Rationale Man and the Book of Pook. Any other recommendations?

 

[MountainSlide]

Okay. Great help. What is AW by the way?

I believe it stands for attention wh0re

 

[dude99]

I believe it stands for attention wh0re

This.

 

[MountainSlide]

"No contact" is basically what I do.

My reasoning: the only reason to get back in touch after the breakup for me is usually some bs idea about "getting closure." BUT, every time you try to get that last bit of "closure" you will ALWAYS come up with some excuse for why the last time you got in touch wasn't "good enough."

Because you will always want a little bit more each time, you might as well stop believing in the idea of closure and keep living.

I do no contact as well. But I also have a bad habit of hooking up with ex’s once I’ve moved on and had some other relationships

 

[Billy James]

My first post. Day 10 or 11 I believe. About 2 weeks ago I went to my fiance's place to find her in bed with another dude. I never told her i caught them. I just left and have gone silent.

I won't return her calls. I won't answer her texts as per the advice of a user here I know personally. He advised me to join this site and do a lot of reading.

Things are very complicated. My head is a mess but I am holding myself together.

 

[dude99]

My first post. Day 10 or 11 I believe. About 2 weeks ago I went to my fiance's place to find her in bed with another dude. I never told her i caught them. I just left and have gone silent.

I won't return her calls. I won't answer her texts as per the advice of a user here I know personally. He advised me to join this site and do a lot of reading.

Things are very complicated. My head is a mess but I am holding myself together.

Stay strong buddy. Be glad this was revealed before the wedding and not after.

It may not feel like it right now but this is a blessing in disguise

 

[Spaz]

@Billy James and others that's going through some hard times.

Some lines must NEVER be crossed.

Once it's crossed, ur only option is to dismiss.

It will take time, perhaps 6 months, maybe more but its a cycle that everyone goes through, for both parties.

Remember this guys;

The path towards being a masculine man is already against the modern society you live in.

Fight against this feminine society.

Fight against those people.

Fight for a chance to live a happy life.

Fight for a life where you won't get humiliated.

To be humiliated without any way to retaliate, to live this kind of life...

R u willing to live that life?

 

[Billy James]

Thank you everyone for the support. I really appreciate it.

Today she left me quite the nasty voice mail. I haven't returned any of her phone calls and she knows I am ignoring her. She says I owe her an explanation for my behaviour. I just deleted it and didn't return the call.

Today I also did what was necessary. I cancelled the hall for the wedding. Don't think it will be possible to get the deposit back. But marrying her is out of the question now also. I have been advised to never give her another chance.

 

[bcude]

I have been advised to never give her another chance.

That's good advice.
You're doing good, she will probably blow up completely knowing what she did and not being able to reach you. Her mind is spinning into overdrive right now.
What makes you say "it's complicated"? You have children?

 

[Billy James]

That's good advice.
You're doing good, she will probably blow up completely knowing what she did and not being able to reach you. Her mind is spinning into overdrive right now.
What makes you say "it's complicated"? You have children?

No, by complicated I meant we have the day picked the hall rented, wedding invitations sent out rsvp's collected everything was in motion and finalized. Basically a lot of money put down on a wedding that now isn't going to happen.

 

[MountainSlide]

You are still HUNDREDS of thousands ahead my friend. Unless you want kids, I would think long and hard about EVER getting married.

Divorce is an expensive proposition. As well as alimony and child support. You’ll be poor lol supporting some Arby’s sandwich bytch who cheated on you and monkey branches off to another dude.

 

[Robert28]

This girl popped in and out of my life for the past year. We never were official but I met her family and her best friend. It was weird because this girl didn’t meet my friends not a single time, even though I tried to set up meetings. It was weird, she never came to my house either. But she’d come and go, for instance we’d hangout for 2-3 months regularly and talk every other day and then she’d get distant for a couple weeks, but this distance kept getting longer and longer each time I noticed. She came around for the final time around Halloween and we made it through New Years. I haven’t seen or spoken to her since Jan 15, this is the longest we’ve gone without seeing each other or talking to each other. I asked her to hangout the weekend after Jan 15 but she said “we might can do something”, never heard a word and still haven’t. So I was smart enough to know not to chase and go no contact permanently because I didn’t want to do this anymore of her walking in and out of my life. Blocked and deleted her number. Oh this is day 13 or 14 I think. Dunno if she’s reached out or not since she’s blocked

 

[Robert28]

Nothing lost. If she really wants to see you she will knock on your door

She has never been to my house, doesn’t know where I live lol

 

[Sponty]

It's been 4 and 1/2 months since we broke up, she monkey branch back to an ex husband. The sex was amazing but she was starting to get disrespectful and I put her in her place which she didn't like and monkey branch back to her ex who she divorced to be with me. She tried to commit suicide 3 weeks after the breakup I was only notified because I was still on the call list at the time. She blocked me on everything for first 2 months. Then unblocked me on facebook and liked a photo of mine in the middle of the night. I can only assume she looks at my facebook while her ex husband is away at work. Just like week recommend friends at on instagram it looks like she unblocked me on instagram. I know I should have but I looked at her instagram, she went and made it public I think she wanted me to see everything.

Apparently she is on some 2 month vacation in europe and north africa with her 2 year old son that her husband is paying for while he stay back in the states and works. 90% of her posts are about being a happy family and so happy she is with her ex husband. It is all bull**** and lies and I can see that, I feel sorry for her. I know she depressed I see it in some of her photos, she is not smiling. Apparently she also made her facebook public aswell I assume because she wants me to see it. Deep down I know she will contact me in the future after the money runs out or she gets into another fight with her ex husband. I'm just so far gone and have my own problems never a chance between us ever again.

Since then though I got an EX (before the last one) of mine pregnant and have been having an on again off again thing going. She finally just shut me down saying she isn't attracted and there is no spark and we are just friends having a baby. I decided to take a job a couple hours away and she is losing her mind melting down.

 

[bcude]

It's been 4 and 1/2 months since we broke up, she monkey branch back to an ex husband. The sex was amazing but she was starting to get disrespectful and I put her in her place which she didn't like and monkey branch back to her ex who she divorced to be with me. She tried to commit suicide 3 weeks after the breakup I was only notified because I was still on the call list at the time. She blocked me on everything for first 2 months. Then unblocked me on facebook and liked a photo of mine in the middle of the night. I can only assume she looks at my facebook while her ex husband is away at work. Just like week recommend friends at on instagram it looks like she unblocked me on instagram. I know I should have but I looked at her instagram, she went and made it public I think she wanted me to see everything.

Apparently she is on some 2 month vacation in europe and north africa with her 2 year old son that her husband is paying for while he stay back in the states and works. 90% of her posts are about being a happy family and so happy she is with her ex husband. It is all bull**** and lies and I can see that, I feel sorry for her. I know she depressed I see it in some of her photos, she is not smiling. Apparently she also made her facebook public aswell I assume because she wants me to see it. Deep down I know she will contact me in the future after the money runs out or she gets into another fight with her ex husband. I'm just so far gone and have my own problems never a chance between us ever again.

Since then though I got an EX (before the last one) of mine pregnant and have been having an on again off again thing going. She finally just shut me down saying she isn't attracted and there is no spark and we are just friends having a baby. I decided to take a job a couple hours away and she is losing her mind melting down.

Uh oh, what a mess. All i can say is that women who put in an effort to make it look like they're happy family now on social media are usually the opposite trying to tell themselves something. Truly happy families don't need to show it, just like wealthy people don't have an urge to show off their riches. She sounds like a trainwreck tbh, stay away for your own sanity.
Also interesting that her ex-husband took her back just like that, they probably wont last.

 

[Sponty]

Bad move. Get a DNA test so you know how badly this is going to fvck up your life.

Maybe it isn't yours

I got DNA test at 14 weeks they are now able to take some of the mother's blood and filter the babies blood non invasive. It cost me around 900 dollars and also gave us the gender which thank god it's a baby boy.