The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
yeah i know things were going good ,i can only think of 2 reasons why i got dumped
1 her ex husband who she left for me got a new women and she felt she lost what control she had over him just the kids ,i noticed he was around more as in in the house not taking kids back to his house and all going to see santa together so i questioned that ,hes there alot more now im not around but she aint seeing him so im told .
2. like last year xmas 2011 there wasnt much time for mne as it was all for the kids and she had him around for dinner and drinks said its for the kids lee make them happy ,and she done it again this year prob knowing i would have not been happy what so ever so she got me out the way for xmas ,cause apart from that we made massive strides in our relationship ,she sat me down said i dont love you no more ,i replied bit quick u was telling me the week before how u did and u was still sleeping with me ,she replied i still find you sexually attractive but dont love you so i took it on the chin
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 14, 2009
Messages
81
Reaction score
0
Sounds like a shes a bit drama driven and selfish.

When kids are involved its always a weird situation. I could date a girl with kids but alot of guys on here would say NO.

If the husband is there id question that esp since they have a history together.

It's tough because she is showing you the classic signs of keeping you on a back burner.

You need to ditch this girl asap.

Remember she took everything from you but pride. Keep your pride. Its tough I am there as well but ive been through this with my ex wife and I no longer think or care for her.

She was the worst person I could have ever been with.
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
sadonomspa said:
Sounds like a shes a bit drama driven and selfish.

When kids are involved its always a weird situation. I could date a girl with kids but alot of guys on here would say NO.

If the husband is there id question that esp since they have a history together.

It's tough because she is showing you the classic signs of keeping you on a back burner.

You need to ditch this girl asap.

Remember she took everything from you but pride. Keep your pride. Its tough I am there as well but ive been through this with my ex wife and I no longer think or care for her.

She was the worst person I could have ever been with.
yeah i get all that ,but not everything was bad things were great ,why i still love the women
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 14, 2009
Messages
81
Reaction score
0
Yea I dont get how women can just flip like that. It's like they can erase things and make new memories.
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
Day 2 done no tx today maybe she aint desperate ,si ive booked aweek away to egypt on my own for the 27th jan try and get myself to mix with strangers and find myself dunno if its my best idea ,im trying to tell myself i dont wanna go back to her ,and get myself a date look after number 1
 

Purefilth

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 13, 2012
Messages
2,776
Reaction score
72
Location
BEAST MODE [ON]
sadonomspa said:
Yea I dont get how women can just flip like that. It's like they can erase things and make new memories.
until next time you have an argument - then EVERYTHING you ever said or did or didnt do is a bullet for her to use against you!

Keep it up lads.
@itcantgetworse - sadonomspa is right, she's trying to backburner you. You need to keep NC. she probably will try contact again in a few weeks.

its normally 2 weeks, then again at 2 months that she'll get a little reachy - thats not a rule, its just a pattern ive noticed.

^might not even be a pattern but thats how it was with me, and ive seen it a few times since.:D
 

j0504s

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 29, 2012
Messages
427
Reaction score
23
Location
ConcernedLauries Bed w/ olivia...NY/SoFlo
12 days of back in n.c ive been so depressed I missed my second day of work ever today in over a yearvand half of this job. I blocked her numbr and all I can think if is she trying to contact me....I wish I had a ****ing radar to stay away from bdp chicks.....
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
Purefilth said:
until next time you have an argument - then EVERYTHING you ever said or did or didnt do is a bullet for her to use against you!

Keep it up lads.
@itcantgetworse - sadonomspa is right, she's trying to backburner you. You need to keep NC. she probably will try contact again in a few weeks.

its normally 2 weeks, then again at 2 months that she'll get a little reachy - thats not a rule, its just a pattern ive noticed.

^might not even be a pattern but thats how it was with me, and ive seen it a few times since.:D
so being on the backburner is there any hope in the future the interest would come back ?
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 14, 2009
Messages
81
Reaction score
0
itcantgetworse said:
so being on the backburner is there any hope in the future the interest would come back ?
Dude seriously? I am going through some crap as well but are you really asking if there is any hope?

Listen, as much as this sucks what we are going through you have to understand, once you go to the back burner you need to take pride in yourself and leave. Yea you can push yourself to the front again but this crap is going to keep happening and happening over and over again.

You are going to get some nasty comments for saying that from some of the people on here.

She took your heart, she took your soul, but dont give her your pride. Stay NC, after the hurricane has pasted you will have a new soul and heart.
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
sadonomspa said:
Dude seriously? I am going through some crap as well but are you really asking if there is any hope?

Listen, as much as this sucks what we are going through you have to understand, once you go to the back burner you need to take pride in yourself and leave. Yea you can push yourself to the front again but this crap is going to keep happening and happening over and over again.

You are going to get some nasty comments for saying that from some of the people on here.

She took your heart, she took your soul, but dont give her your pride. Stay NC, after the hurricane has pasted you will have a new soul and heart.
yeah i know just not sleeping and having a weak moment ill take the stick might do me good
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 14, 2009
Messages
81
Reaction score
0
itcantgetworse said:
yeah i know just not sleeping and having a weak moment ill take the stick might do me good
Dude if you cant be there for yourself how the hell are you going to be there for a girl or wife or whatever you want?
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
sadonomspa said:
Dude if you cant be there for yourself how the hell are you going to be there for a girl or wife or whatever you want?
dunno i aint experieced this before
 

j0504s

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 29, 2012
Messages
427
Reaction score
23
Location
ConcernedLauries Bed w/ olivia...NY/SoFlo
13 days n/c woke up alright today, slept decent for the first time in like 5 weeks. My mind wasnt racing of thouhts of her for the first night in a while. hope this stays true for today and tonight. Her number being blocked obvs. brings some curiousity to see if she has been contacting me...wish i didnt care or think about it...
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
done 3 days now ,wasnt to bad today still mind drifting tried to keep busy also in a sad way my dads death anniversary was today so i take that as a plus he was way more important ,arranged with some people i seen for a while to go out thats what i need to get out and have fun ,some might say thats easy but as i said before having the affair cost me my circle of friends heres to being stronger keep my pride ,thanks for the advice i do listen and i will get through this
 

j0504s

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 29, 2012
Messages
427
Reaction score
23
Location
ConcernedLauries Bed w/ olivia...NY/SoFlo
OK BOYZ, Back to 14 days on N/C. I may have had some sort of break through emotionally but lets see if it sticks...I certainly hope it does. Last night I helped a friend in desprate need of female/social help. It helped me out alot. just speaking to him about certain things reminded me of the mindset to be in. I may be ready this weekend after 5-6 weeks to start up again...I certainly hope I am. Im starting et some resentment towards her as much as im told shes "BPD" she cant controll it "its not you" "blah blah" Just mad about her calling me on christmas saying" We should be toeather" "Dont you miss havin sex with me" only to follow with "im seeing a new guy" just staright resent...which led to me actually blocking her number this time....Im seeing things ina better light atleast....i can only take this year with this girl is a chance to learn and move foward
 

itcantgetworse

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
44
Reaction score
0
dat 4 done seen each other this morning opposite a junction in cars i didnt look at her or ackowledge her ,not really gave her a thought today more and more interested in my self ,now the funny thing before i got with lisa i was sort of seeing this girl kelly who lisa use to hate jelous thing well since i broke up i got a tx polite she having probs with ex too anyway we aint been tx much then today out the blue got this ,ive just found the card from the flowers you sent me that time X
is there a hint in that ?
anyway looks like my telling off done me the world of good
 

Purefilth

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 13, 2012
Messages
2,776
Reaction score
72
Location
BEAST MODE [ON]
j0504s said:
OK BOYZ, Back to 14 days on N/C. I may have had some sort of break through emotionally but lets see if it sticks...I certainly hope it does. Last night I helped a friend in desprate need of female/social help. It helped me out alot. just speaking to him about certain things reminded me of the mindset to be in. I may be ready this weekend after 5-6 weeks to start up again...I certainly hope I am. Im starting et some resentment towards her as much as im told shes "BPD" she cant controll it "its not you" "blah blah" Just mad about her calling me on christmas saying" We should be toeather" "Dont you miss havin sex with me" only to follow with "im seeing a new guy" just staright resent...which led to me actually blocking her number this time....Im seeing things ina better light atleast....i can only take this year with this girl is a chance to learn and move foward
:up: good stuff - learn and keep it going
itcantgetworse said:
dat 4 done seen each other this morning opposite a junction in cars i didnt look at her or ackowledge her ,not really gave her a thought today more and more interested in my self ,now the funny thing before i got with lisa i was sort of seeing this girl kelly who lisa use to hate jelous thing well since i broke up i got a tx polite she having probs with ex too anyway we aint been tx much then today out the blue got this ,ive just found the card from the flowers you sent me that time X
is there a hint in that ?
anyway looks like my telling off done me the world of good
she wants attention from you

keep it up lad:up:
 
Top