The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

Cerwin Vega

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I updated my post

also, about 3.

My ex's little brother is 2.5 years old so I knew him from day 0.
He's kind of retarded, very slow development - I think he can't even say a single word to this day. I remember she would always tell me "I don't wanna tell you what's wrong with him", so I guess it's similar to what you've just said.

Also, girls at 18-24 are f**king stupid. Un-dateable.
 

MattTheW

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Ok.
You go out and you buy a TV
You enjoy your TV, every day you watch programs on it, and you're happy
But in the back of your mind you know that any day after you've purchased it that that TV could break.....
What do you do? Never watch it just in case it breaks? NO, you watch it every day, to make your life a little better, and then when it breaks, what do you do
Do you sit around moping, or even try and fix the TV? NO, you go out to the shop and you buy another one and you never think of that old TV again......

EVERYONE is capable of cheating, does that mean you shouldn't have a relationship with someone? NO, just be aware that it COULD happen. And if it does happen, or the relationship ends, then you move on, the issue is that too many people make their partner their life, when they should just be there to enrich YOUR LIFE......
 

StuffofLegends

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I get it guys.. Sorry for being so negative... I realize now that I'm wolliwing in self pitty. It's not healthy. I will be more careful of the words I use and balls up! This is BS!!!
 

Well I'm here to tell you there is such a magic wand. Something that will make you almost completely irresistible to any woman you "point it" at. Something guaranteed to fill your life with love, romance, and excitement.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

finickywake

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SoSuave666 said:
Day 1

Yikes!
Gooood luck.

I'm not sure how long it's been. Certainly over a month, probably not 2 months yet. But close.

Anyways, ex called me twice last night. The second time left a voicemail, which I listened to this morning, and it was just noise, music in the background, fuzzy.

Her phone isn't really capable of 'butt dialing'. I feel like it's a lame attempt for her to contact me. It's really pissed me off, to be honest. I had nearly forgotten about her and breaking up with her and then I see her calling. And calling again.

Even though I have not responded, I want to. I want to respond to her e-mails and get **** off my chest. But I won't.

That's why I came here. I'm reeling with varying thoughts. Mainly just bummed out I'm even thinking about her again.

Oh well, going to the gym tomorrow.

I've had some success with a chick a few weeks ago, but it made me realize I don't even feel like dating right now. Just the cost of gas driving to dates is enough to deter me for the moment.

Peace.
 

Cerwin Vega

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finickywake said:
Gooood luck.

I'm not sure how long it's been. Certainly over a month, probably not 2 months yet. But close.

Anyways, ex called me twice last night. The second time left a voicemail, which I listened to this morning, and it was just noise, music in the background, fuzzy.

Her phone isn't really capable of 'butt dialing'. I feel like it's a lame attempt for her to contact me. It's really pissed me off, to be honest. I had nearly forgotten about her and breaking up with her and then I see her calling. And calling again.

Even though I have not responded, I want to. I want to respond to her e-mails and get **** off my chest. But I won't.

That's why I came here. I'm reeling with varying thoughts. Mainly just bummed out I'm even thinking about her again.

Oh well, going to the gym tomorrow.

I've had some success with a chick a few weeks ago, but it made me realize I don't even feel like dating right now. Just the cost of gas driving to dates is enough to deter me for the moment.

Peace.
That's when healing takes place.

Jumping through branches like many mentioned exes in this thread are doing only masks the feelings and delays them up until the point they explode violently. But with girls won't reflect in any way because girl's hamster wheel will spin and rationalize everything as if it wasn't her fault - as for guys...our head gets f**ked up.
 

Colette

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StuffofLegends said:
@Colette

She met me in the park, handed me a letter to read because she couldn't tell me herself and even tried to read the letter to me but couldn't.. She sat there with sunglasses on her face while I read the letter...

It read that she needed to find herself, needed time alone, I was amazing, hoped we could still be friends... I asked her if we could work in this together and she said no that she had to do this by herself... I said thanks for wasting 3 yrs of my life and stormed off! She ran off balling...

A week later I found out she was seeing someone else, contacted her about it and she denied it all, then 3 wks after the break up they (same guy I heard about previously) announced in facebook that they were together.. I didn't even bother with contacting her this time.

I don't know your whole story but obviously she was coward and did not tell you that she already had found someone else and all this ``I want to find myself `` or ``I want space`` was a bunch of BS. can`t you see?
She just wanted to get rid of you and feel not guilty about it and start her new relationship. while you are sitting on your a$$ and analyzing the obvious. Forget about her man , she replaced you , find someone who wants you no matter what. I don't even know why you miss this girl you should actually hate her. she was fooling around behind your back man. don't forget she deceived you.
 

StuffofLegends

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@Colette

Yeah, I totally get what was taking place and what happened. I def don't want her back! I'm clear on both those issues but the moving on with my life has been the struggle... Thanks though, I realize I have to stop wasting my time worrying so much about her... I'm really trying.
 

finickywake

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CerwinVegaFan said:
That's when healing takes place.

Jumping through branches like many mentioned exes in this thread are doing only masks the feelings and delays them up until the point they explode violently. But with girls won't reflect in any way because girl's hamster wheel will spin and rationalize everything as if it wasn't her fault - as for guys...our head gets f**ked up.
Thanks for the reply. I agree.

It's just bizarre that I even have to take time to 'heal' or whatever. I'm in a strange place where I simultaneously miss having her yet want nothing to do with her. I can't wait until she's a distant memory.

It's gonna be nice to take a break from women for a while anyway. Getting back in the dating scene just revealed how trivial 98 percent of women/dating is.

I wanted to test the don juan/game type theory and basically succeeded when using 'game' and watched interest dissipate exceptionally fast when not. Hard to explain.

Anyways, life goes on. Women are replaceable. I think that's what's strange to accept. No one is special.
 

Colette

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StuffofLegends said:
@Colette

She met me in the park, handed me a letter to read because she couldn't tell me herself and even tried to read the letter to me but couldn't.. She sat there with sunglasses on her face while I read the letter...

It read that she needed to find herself, needed time alone, I was amazing, hoped we could still be friends... I asked her if we could work in this together and she said no that she had to do this by herself... I said thanks for wasting 3 yrs of my life and stormed off! She ran off balling...

A week later I found out she was seeing someone else, contacted her about it and she denied it all, then 3 wks after the break up they (same guy I heard about previously) announced in facebook that they were together.. I didn't even bother with contacting her this time.


I know it`s hard but what choice do you have. your ex is interested in sucking another d!ck and enjoying it. Accept it and move on. it`s not that you have so many options with her. In the long run she may change her mind about you and wants you back she may not but you can`t just sit and hope . it`s not healthy.
imagine another d!ck in your ex-gf`s mouth all the time, that makes it easier to forget what you guys had.
don`t forget all these times that you spend thinking about her she is out there and having all sort of hot sex.
 

StuffofLegends

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Colette said:
I know it`s hard but what choice do you have. your ex is interested in sucking another d!ck and enjoying it. Accept it and move on. it`s not that you have so many options with her. In the long run she may change her mind about you and wants you back she may not but you can`t just sit and hope . it`s not healthy.
imagine another d!ck in your ex-gf`s mouth all the time, that makes it easier to forget what you guys had.
don`t forget all these times that you spend thinking about her she is out there and having all sort of hot sex.
Haha I NEVER said I was sitting around and hoping for anything with her??? In fact I said the exact opposite! I've also got better things to think about than her sex life!! It has nothing to do with me now. I'm cool. Thanks.
 

Colette

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StuffofLegends said:
Haha I NEVER said I was sitting around and hoping for anything with her??? In fact I said the exact opposite! I've also got better things to think about than her sex life!! It has nothing to do with me now. I'm cool. Thanks.



You mentioned how could she just threw away your 3 years relationship and i suggested instead of thinking like that , imagine d!ck in her mouth . Because that is a reality now, she is busy with someone else. Your 3 years relationship is a distant memory now and the girl you once knew as your gf is totally changed and is nobody but a stranger.
 

StuffofLegends

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Colette said:
You mentioned how could she just threw away your 3 years relationship and i suggested instead of thinking like that , imagine d!ck in her mouth . Because that is a reality now, she is busy with someone else. Your 3 years relationship is a distant memory now and the girl you once knew as your gf is totally changed and is nobody but a stranger.
Yes. I agree and accept that this is true.
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

StuffofLegends

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Day 8 NC

Main emotion I'm feeling today is indifference. Beginning more and more not to care.. All the lies she has told ppl about me after the break up along with everything else just shows me what a low quality woman I thought I wanted to spend my life with. Instead of grieving I will celebrate being free!!!
 

Noyou

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Im furthering what I've been saying again and again. YOU NEED TO DO NC FOR YOURSELF. All I've been seeing lately is people on the board, talk a good game, which it is, but the thing is you're doing it because you want to get back with the ex.

I mean sure, I'm a guy too that wanted to get his ex back and use NC for a means to make her feel a certain way, the reality behind that is that there is some force that drove you both together, and she can sense you still pine for her wether it be love, sex, etc.

You need to go NC for you, better yourself, live, meet new people.

I'll tell you some of my story. Ex I was with, loved her with all my heart, thought she was very attractive, busty, sweet, etc. however she came with ALOT of baggage, that i fully accepted. In short, the relationship was easily 80/20 (I gave 80 she gave 20)

She didn't really have to try hard in the relationship because she used her charm and breasts to her advantage with me. However after awhile I started to see her flaws more and more and that's when I started having problems with her. She brushed them off and said I was nagging her with it. But when she had an issue, I had to listen. She never wanted to do anything different than her comfortable normal, and it rubbed off on me and I became lazy. In short she didn't want to try.

Once I demanded she started to try, she became distant and over time dumped be because she felt, "I wasn't the one" after 5 years.

It hurt me more to know that even if she said she'd try to make things work and stand up for what's right, she never did. She never really cared on what my needs were, just her own.


Skip 3 months after the break. I'm meeting women, that in short, want to please me in love, sex, etc.

It literally blew my mind what some women will do for the person they like.

For example, my ex gf hated giving oral, but liked getting it, and when she was tired, she wouldn't want sex or anything of the sort. She would be concerned on how she felt and her only

These new ladies, they want to please every shape and form, and I met and known them for 2 months. But the reason this is because I'm such a good guy and was myself, they've come to like me a lot and want to make sure that I stick around. But in order that I reached this point, I'd did NC FOR ME ONLY.

I've been in you guy's position already. In order to see real results, you have to get over the ex and move on. If she comes back around, then and only then you can deal talking to her again, but you'll do it levelheaded
 
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Cerwin Vega

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I think it's the same process as overcoming a serious drug addiction.
What you've described is the first phase: denial - I'll go NC for 'myself' when in reality I do it to get her back = I don't have a problem, I can stop whenever I want.

Meeting new women is very important, however, some of us social reptiles have difficulty doing that, especially without a healthy social circle, I'm talking about myself of course.
 

StuffofLegends

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Thanks for sharing Noyou. That was really insightful.

Day 9 NC

Still just feeling indifferent again today. Went to the movies the other night with family and celebrated my sister's birthday. Began to have those old memories of the Ex rise up and holding hands at the theatre but had to remind myself those were good times and if she still valued them or me they wouldn't be over now.. She is one female and I will meet another to share moments such as these again. Another better even :)
 
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