The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

Lotus Effect

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Jariel said:
I think deep down, you know that sending this text is a bad idea. Trust your rational judgement.
Yeah, I know it!

That's why I asked. At least this time I had enough power to hold my emotions!

You are right in everything you just said man! All this msg would do would be prolonging my pain. I've done once, I would just be doing the same mistake again, this time with less words.

It's all because I had recent news about her, that she went out with a mutual friend. It crushed me just knowing her was alive.

Than my sister had the stupid idea of telling me that that she is travelling with the other dude, and they are all happy and living their lifes, and he is posting normal stuff on her facebook with I love by the end.

It was bad. I know I have to shut the f up. It just is hard some days, and today was one of them!

Anyway, thanks for putting some sense I my mind. I had 2 friend back here telling me the same. So I know yoú are all right.

Thanks man!
 

Jariel

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Lotus Effect said:
Yeah, I know it!

That's why I asked. At least this time I had enough power to hold my emotions!

You are right in everything you just said man! All this msg would do would be prolonging my pain. I've done once, I would just be doing the same mistake again, this time with less words.

It's all because I had recent news about her, that she went out with a mutual friend. It crushed me just knowing her was alive.

Than my sister had the stupid idea of telling me that that she is travelling with the other dude, and they are all happy and living their lifes, and he is posting normal stuff on her facebook with I love by the end.

It was bad. I know I have to shut the f up. It just is hard some days, and today was one of them!

Anyway, thanks for putting some sense I my mind. I had 2 friend back here telling me the same. So I know yoú are all right.

Thanks man!

We all have those moments of emotional thinking and we convince ourselves that making contact is a good idea. I feel your pain. I have no idea what my ex is upto now or who she is with, but the thought of her moving on and being happy with someone else really hurts me. But these days I'm using this to motivate me to become a better man and to transcend the relationship I left behind.

In these moments where you doubt yourself and want to reach out to her, just go back and read all your quality posts and think about how much control your ego is trying to take.
 

Jariel

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Inspiration...

I'm at the point now where I'm transmuting my pain into a fire within me, that's spurring me in the most productive ways. I'm rebuilding myself to the best I can be. I'm hitting the gym hard and looking good, I'm working every day on my business and making good money, and I'm determined to become a greater man as a result of this break up.


Here's a quick Summary of how this whole break up has affected me...

At first the pain will break you down and reduce you to the most pathetic, desperate and fragile specimen you have ever been. You will cry. You will want to beg your ex to take you back. You will think about her every minute of every day and your body will tremble and ache with pain. You will ask everyone for advice, desperate for some thread of hope you can cling to, just any excuse to make contact again and try to work things out. Some days you will understand what other people are telling you, about why No Contact is your best option, then other days your emotions will cloud your judgement, you won't be thinking straight and it's like you become this other person.

It takes everything you've got just to get out of bed in a morning and face another day. You feel like giving up on life and ending all this pain and torment. You go about your day just trying to act normal, trying to keep your dignity. You talk to anyone who will listen and the future looks so dark and hopeless.

But day by day, you pull yourself back to your feet and take another step forward. One step at a time, you get on with your life, you start seeing your friends, start doing the things you enjoy and those moments of respite where the pain goes away get longer and longer. Eventually you find yourself able to function like a normal human being again. The thoughts are still invading your mind and you're still tempted to check in with her or check her Facebook. Why? Because part of you misses the pain...because letting go of that pain means you're finally letting go of all hope and accepting that she is gone forever.

So you continue to carry the pain around for a while longer until one day you realise that you've emerged from this experience wiser and stronger than ever. You've been to hell and back and you survived. You realise that this pain is what you needed to snap out of your complacency. You can learn to embrace the pain as an ally and use it to fuel you to new heights.

When you're in the gym, you remember your ex and you find the strength to push out a few more reps and go that extra mile. When you're wasting your free time watching TV, you think of your ex and decide to go read a book, learn something new, start a new business venture or start putting your dreams into action.

I like to think into the future of my ex getting complacent with some other dude, how they settle into their routine, getting fat, losing their passion and taking each other for granted...and meanwhile I'm hitting the gym, getting bulked and ripped, making a success of my life, having women chasing me and then one day I run into my ex and her mind fills with regret, she can't stop thinking what it would be like to be with me again. She starts fantasizing about me while her boyfriend is sat in front of the TV.

Sounds like an idealistic scenario, right? Well, this is how it has been for me time and time again. This is how it has gone with most of my exes and many of the girls I dated. Just yesterday I received a mail from a girl who dumped me for another guy. A while ago she told me she pictured me when she read the 50 Shades books and had been having fantasies about me. She has told me she regrets missing out on what could've been and hints at how unsatisfied she is. A week ago I got a similar mail from another short term GF who tells me her relationship is going badly and keeps hinting that she's looking to get with me. I also get occasional flirty emails from many other girls I dated, despite being in steady relationships.

With each break up and heartbreak I've ever experienced, I've emerged a better man. One time I lost weight and changed my image, and suddenly started getting attention from lots of women. Another time I bulked up and started turning more heads. Another break up lead me to this site where I learned the art of seduction, social skills, dating and so on, and I became one of the most popular guys on my campus. After my break up 5 years ago I decided to play the field, was banging some of the hottest chicks I've ever met (underwear models, Hooters waitress and fitness instructors) and experimenting with new fantasies, learning how to excite and satisfy women and how to push them out of their comfort zone. This experience is what enabled me to give my ex orgasms at will, to be the best sex she's ever had and to lead her to new and exciting experiences. And now her loss will be another woman's gain.

Now I'm finding my fire again. This is the fire that passes the average contented man by. This is why they spiral into complacency, while guys like us go on to become great. It may not feel like it right now, but one day you will be thankful for this pain because without it, you would never become the exceptional man you're going to become.


This is the greatest inspiration for self improvement there is. Embrace it!
 

drakeramore

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Hey guys,

Lotus, I am at the exact same point in my healing journey.

I thought of writing something to her or, at least, wait for her to contact me again so that I could reply to her message with some farewell text of my own.

It would be something a bit different than yours, perhaps a bit more bitter but nonetheless the message would be the same - ie what has been has been, farewell, we will not meet ever again.

I too feel I have left the door open for her as the last time I spoke to her I expressed my undying love for her ( :) ), so naturally she feels at the moment as if I will be waiting for her in case her new relationship fails.

I too don't like that idea, I am attempting to move on here on my own and push her out of my mind. So I also thought it would be proper to write smth to her.

After reading Jariel's post though I am not convinced that it will do any good anymore. He is 100% right, I know in my heart that is a bad idea - why write anything again to her, no matter if bitter or casual or totally detached from any prior emotion. It will be just a new act on my part to stir things up, to remind her of me and who I am and what we had together.

It will remind her that I am still focused on her even if I know she is with another guy right now. This would imply that I am still hurting and in love with her. Not exactly the message a real Man would like to send to a girl who has moved on. Wreaks of lack of options and desperation.

I too had a bad day today, thought about her all afternoon, had her image in my head quite a few times I closed my eyes, pathetic as hell. A part of me is laughing at me at the moment - the part of me that is immensely proud and self-sufficient. These days though that part is quite subdued to my emotional and sensitive side. Because let us face it - all (or most of) guys here are sensitive, otherwise we would have just shrugged the situation off and moved on without a care in the world.

Anyway, I read today some of my mails to her right after she told me about her leaving to live in another country and quitting her job here in the city I live. I was embarrassed to read just how apologetic I was in my mails to her, to what lengths I went in my being a doormat for her, I took all the blame and not even once did not direct at least a small part of it at her. Even if she deserved some of it as well.

I was not myself in those days, was crushed and felt as if I am to blame for all misfortune and she was this innocent, naive and perfect angel. Which in hindsight is simply not true. She too has her fair share of responsibility and issues that caused the downfall of what we had and shared.

Anyway, long story short, thanks guys - Lotus and Jariel - for your posts.

I will try to overcome that need to write something final to my ex girl and to close that door. That is just my desire to communicate with her in some way, to cause her to think about me and to feel a bit of pain, regret etc just as I am right now.

Stay strong, guys!
 

Lotus Effect

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Jariel said:
Inspiration...

I'm at the point now where I'm transmuting my pain into a fire within me, that's spurring me in the most productive ways. I'm rebuilding myself to the best I can be. I'm hitting the gym hard and looking good, I'm working every day on my business and making good money, and I'm determined to become a greater man as a result of this break up.


Here's a quick Summary of how this whole break up has affected me...

At first the pain will break you down and reduce you to the most pathetic, desperate and fragile specimen you have ever been. You will cry. You will want to beg your ex to take you back. You will think about her every minute of every day and your body will tremble and ache with pain. You will ask everyone for advice, desperate for some thread of hope you can cling to, just any excuse to make contact again and try to work things out. Some days you will understand what other people are telling you, about why No Contact is your best option, then other days your emotions will cloud your judgement, you won't be thinking straight and it's like you become this other person.

It takes everything you've got just to get out of bed in a morning and face another day. You feel like giving up on life and ending all this pain and torment. You go about your day just trying to act normal, trying to keep your dignity. You talk to anyone who will listen and the future looks so dark and hopeless.

But day by day, you pull yourself back to your feet and take another step forward. One step at a time, you get on with your life, you start seeing your friends, start doing the things you enjoy and those moments of respite where the pain goes away get longer and longer. Eventually you find yourself able to function like a normal human being again. The thoughts are still invading your mind and you're still tempted to check in with her or check her Facebook. Why? Because part of you misses the pain...because letting go of that pain means you're finally letting go of all hope and accepting that she is gone forever.

So you continue to carry the pain around for a while longer until one day you realise that you've emerged from this experience wiser and stronger than ever. You've been to hell and back and you survived. You realise that this pain is what you needed to snap out of your complacency. You can learn to embrace the pain as an ally and use it to fuel you to new heights.

When you're in the gym, you remember your ex and you find the strength to push out a few more reps and go that extra mile. When you're wasting your free time watching TV, you think of your ex and decide to go read a book, learn something new, start a new business venture or start putting your dreams into action.

I like to think into the future of my ex getting complacent with some other dude, how they settle into their routine, getting fat, losing their passion and taking each other for granted...and meanwhile I'm hitting the gym, getting bulked and ripped, making a success of my life, having women chasing me and then one day I run into my ex and her mind fills with regret, she can't stop thinking what it would be like to be with me again. She starts fantasizing about me while her boyfriend is sat in front of the TV.

Sounds like an idealistic scenario, right? Well, this is how it has been for me time and time again. This is how it has gone with most of my exes and many of the girls I dated. Just yesterday I received a mail from a girl who dumped me for another guy. A while ago she told me she pictured me when she read the 50 Shades books and had been having fantasies about me. She has told me she regrets missing out on what could've been and hints at how unsatisfied she is. A week ago I got a similar mail from another short term GF who tells me her relationship is going badly and keeps hinting that she's looking to get with me. I also get occasional flirty emails from many other girls I dated, despite being in steady relationships.

With each break up and heartbreak I've ever experienced, I've emerged a better man. One time I lost weight and changed my image, and suddenly started getting attention from lots of women. Another time I bulked up and started turning more heads. Another break up lead me to this site where I learned the art of seduction, social skills, dating and so on, and I became one of the most popular guys on my campus. After my break up 5 years ago I decided to play the field, was banging some of the hottest chicks I've ever met (underwear models, Hooters waitress and fitness instructors) and experimenting with new fantasies, learning how to excite and satisfy women and how to push them out of their comfort zone. This experience is what enabled me to give my ex orgasms at will, to be the best sex she's ever had and to lead her to new and exciting experiences. And now her loss will be another woman's gain.

Now I'm finding my fire again. This is the fire that passes the average contented man by. This is why they spiral into complacency, while guys like us go on to become great. It may not feel like it right now, but one day you will be thankful for this pain because without it, you would never become the exceptional man you're going to become.


This is the greatest inspiration for self improvement there is. Embrace it!
I must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Jariel again...
...as usual
Great post! And again, thanks for pouring the truth in my eyes man!

EDIT: I just read my Ego take the blow post. I really do know sh*t. Thanks for reminding me! :up:
 

qwerty1234

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day 1 of nc

Begin seeing this guy early this year.

Initially was really skeptical and did a lot of bs things to him. He persisted and eventually moved my heart. Fast forward a few months..

He is now getting back with ex whom he is supposed to be marrying before we met.. he cited that his parents is pressuring him and that they've deemed the girl as their daughter in law as theyve dated for about 6years plus...

He left me after a family trip with her .... he is slowly fading away from me... all these happened a month ago.. I did all the usual crazy things that he did previously.... but right now.. its all one sided as compared to back then.

Therefore, I know it is time to move on from all these hurt. I still miss him but I know its impossible to be together. My heart just tells me to forget and move on since he's not in love with me as actions speaks louder than words.. it hurts.. but I just want to move on quickly and erase him from my life ..

Please help me through this journey... thank you in advance to all.
 

Lotus Effect

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@drakeramore

First of all +1 Rep for you man. Amazing how much we grow up when we go through this kind of pain. Considering your first posts, I'm impressed by your calm and recolection.

And secondly, I would like to add that i have already made the mistake to send her a message when I was in a bad state to "try and end things". It haven't worked out of course, and the door is still open.

This is something I've said in the past, but all this "closure" talk, is nothing more than our Egos who are hurt and want to have an upper hand in a impossible situation. So we really have to let the ego take that blow. By doing so, we grow strong as men.

With that said, I'd like to thank for your support man, I wish you keep growing to an extent where you can start helping other dudes more than you need help around here. I'd also like to suggest you to fight this urge of contacting her, I'm living proof that it is worthless and just prolongues your pain. Anytime you feel like doing it, come here first, and as I did, ask for clarification.

And in another note, if you can, delete all this sh*t you've sent her. You will feel bad of how pathetic you were. Just know in your mind what you did, and that at that time it felt right and forget about it. Eventually the words will begin to fade in your mind and you will not have the texts anymore to recollect your wording!

Thanks man, and keep it up! :up:
 

Blinkers

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Day 1.

My girlfriend of 3 years told me that she would like to separate this afternoon. I wasn’t expecting it as we have been discussing buying a house together, having kids and getting married. I suppose it may have been all a little overwhelming for her, although she initiated the conversations to start with. Until she mentioned the whole family scene it hadn’t been at the front of my mind but ever since she did, it’s all I think about. I want to be a father!
Being pig headed I just said “I think if there is going to be this level of ambiguity in our relationship then it’s a good idea to split up and move on.”
Her response was that perhaps this should be a trial separation with a time limit to see how her life is without me in it and vice versa. I just said “no, let’s leave it an open ended break up and whatever will be, will be”

And so she is gone, even took our Goldfish. I will miss flipper, I wonder who he would have chose.

I love her with all my heart but I am not capable of begging since I tried that a few times before in past relationships and it only ever made things worse for me.

I have heard of the no contact rule, never before been strong enough to try it but after a few failed relationships I think I can give it a bash and if nothing else, it’s a new project to concentrate on.

So, no social network memberships (except this) barred telephone number, blocked email and told her I have so I can concentrate on what’s important to me.
 

drakeramore

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Thanks for the kind words, Lotus, I really appreciate it!

Just thought I should let you know that I deleted everything today, I couldn't stand it still being in my mailbox, it is proof of how weak-minded I was just a few weeks ago. Nevertheless I will remember what I wrote to her and just how pathetic it was. It will sting but will be a valuable lesson for the future.

I agree with you, it is our egos as men that want to have the last word. We want to end these relationships on our own terms, to have the last word, to end them ourselves and not simply get dumped and rejected by another person. It is humiliating and is shaking up our confidence as men.

But when a door closes, often another opens. All this ego-sh!t, boasting and showing off just how irresistible we are and how we never could possibly get rejected - these are all delusions of our perception of self, our egos, our images of ourselves - how awesomely invincible we are.

These are false concepts, everyone of us can fall down and crumble at some point. The important thing is to pick ourselves up and move on, grow stronger and wiser. Experiences (especially bad ones) can be turned into invaluable lessons if we choose to look at them objectively and learn from them, admit our mistakes and not fool ourselves that we "don't give a flying fack" if we are hurt and bleeding on the inside.

It is not easy to let go of your ego in today's world when you are consistently bombarded and taught how appearances are all and how you must not at any point be a failure.

Failure stings, it burns you but it teaches you as well. Success makes you complacent. Victory defeats you at times.

I too would like to thank you, Lotus, from all my heart, you and the other guys around here who mean well and supply me and everyone else here with advice, support and are sincere about their experiences. Thus I feel that I am not the only one going through this and can find some extra strength in me that this will end eventually and I will be better and wiser at the end of the journey.

Fight on, guys!
 

mikey2012

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Jariel said:
Inspiration...

I'm at the point now where I'm transmuting my pain into a fire within me, that's spurring me in the most productive ways. I'm rebuilding myself to the best I can be. I'm hitting the gym hard and looking good, I'm working every day on my business and making good money, and I'm determined to become a greater man as a result of this break up.


Here's a quick Summary of how this whole break up has affected me...

At first the pain will break you down and reduce you to the most pathetic, desperate and fragile specimen you have ever been. You will cry. You will want to beg your ex to take you back. You will think about her every minute of every day and your body will tremble and ache with pain. You will ask everyone for advice, desperate for some thread of hope you can cling to, just any excuse to make contact again and try to work things out. Some days you will understand what other people are telling you, about why No Contact is your best option, then other days your emotions will cloud your judgement, you won't be thinking straight and it's like you become this other person.

It takes everything you've got just to get out of bed in a morning and face another day. You feel like giving up on life and ending all this pain and torment. You go about your day just trying to act normal, trying to keep your dignity. You talk to anyone who will listen and the future looks so dark and hopeless.

But day by day, you pull yourself back to your feet and take another step forward. One step at a time, you get on with your life, you start seeing your friends, start doing the things you enjoy and those moments of respite where the pain goes away get longer and longer. Eventually you find yourself able to function like a normal human being again. The thoughts are still invading your mind and you're still tempted to check in with her or check her Facebook. Why? Because part of you misses the pain...because letting go of that pain means you're finally letting go of all hope and accepting that she is gone forever.

So you continue to carry the pain around for a while longer until one day you realise that you've emerged from this experience wiser and stronger than ever. You've been to hell and back and you survived. You realise that this pain is what you needed to snap out of your complacency. You can learn to embrace the pain as an ally and use it to fuel you to new heights.

When you're in the gym, you remember your ex and you find the strength to push out a few more reps and go that extra mile. When you're wasting your free time watching TV, you think of your ex and decide to go read a book, learn something new, start a new business venture or start putting your dreams into action.

I like to think into the future of my ex getting complacent with some other dude, how they settle into their routine, getting fat, losing their passion and taking each other for granted...and meanwhile I'm hitting the gym, getting bulked and ripped, making a success of my life, having women chasing me and then one day I run into my ex and her mind fills with regret, she can't stop thinking what it would be like to be with me again. She starts fantasizing about me while her boyfriend is sat in front of the TV.

Sounds like an idealistic scenario, right? Well, this is how it has been for me time and time again. This is how it has gone with most of my exes and many of the girls I dated. Just yesterday I received a mail from a girl who dumped me for another guy. A while ago she told me she pictured me when she read the 50 Shades books and had been having fantasies about me. She has told me she regrets missing out on what could've been and hints at how unsatisfied she is. A week ago I got a similar mail from another short term GF who tells me her relationship is going badly and keeps hinting that she's looking to get with me. I also get occasional flirty emails from many other girls I dated, despite being in steady relationships.

With each break up and heartbreak I've ever experienced, I've emerged a better man. One time I lost weight and changed my image, and suddenly started getting attention from lots of women. Another time I bulked up and started turning more heads. Another break up lead me to this site where I learned the art of seduction, social skills, dating and so on, and I became one of the most popular guys on my campus. After my break up 5 years ago I decided to play the field, was banging some of the hottest chicks I've ever met (underwear models, Hooters waitress and fitness instructors) and experimenting with new fantasies, learning how to excite and satisfy women and how to push them out of their comfort zone. This experience is what enabled me to give my ex orgasms at will, to be the best sex she's ever had and to lead her to new and exciting experiences. And now her loss will be another woman's gain.

Now I'm finding my fire again. This is the fire that passes the average contented man by. This is why they spiral into complacency, while guys like us go on to become great. It may not feel like it right now, but one day you will be thankful for this pain because without it, you would never become the exceptional man you're going to become.


This is the greatest inspiration for self improvement there is. Embrace it![/QUOTE

Superb post +1 rep
 

mikey2012

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drakeramore said:
Hey guys,

Lotus, I am at the exact same point in my healing journey.

I thought of writing something to her or, at least, wait for her to contact me again so that I could reply to her message with some farewell text of my own.

It would be something a bit different than yours, perhaps a bit more bitter but nonetheless the message would be the same - ie what has been has been, farewell, we will not meet ever again.

I too feel I have left the door open for her as the last time I spoke to her I expressed my undying love for her ( :) ), so naturally she feels at the moment as if I will be waiting for her in case her new relationship fails.

I too don't like that idea, I am attempting to move on here on my own and push her out of my mind. So I also thought it would be proper to write smth to her.

After reading Jariel's post though I am not convinced that it will do any good anymore. He is 100% right, I know in my heart that is a bad idea - why write anything again to her, no matter if bitter or casual or totally detached from any prior emotion. It will be just a new act on my part to stir things up, to remind her of me and who I am and what we had together.

It will remind her that I am still focused on her even if I know she is with another guy right now. This would imply that I am still hurting and in love with her. Not exactly the message a real Man would like to send to a girl who has moved on. Wreaks of lack of options and desperation.

I too had a bad day today, thought about her all afternoon, had her image in my head quite a few times I closed my eyes, pathetic as hell. A part of me is laughing at me at the moment - the part of me that is immensely proud and self-sufficient. These days though that part is quite subdued to my emotional and sensitive side. Because let us face it - all (or most of) guys here are sensitive, otherwise we would have just shrugged the situation off and moved on without a care in the world.

Anyway, I read today some of my mails to her right after she told me about her leaving to live in another country and quitting her job here in the city I live. I was embarrassed to read just how apologetic I was in my mails to her, to what lengths I went in my being a doormat for her, I took all the blame and not even once did not direct at least a small part of it at her. Even if she deserved some of it as well.

I was not myself in those days, was crushed and felt as if I am to blame for all misfortune and she was this innocent, naive and perfect angel. Which in hindsight is simply not true. She too has her fair share of responsibility and issues that caused the downfall of what we had and shared.

Anyway, long story short, thanks guys - Lotus and Jariel - for your posts.

I will try to overcome that need to write something final to my ex girl and to close that door. That is just my desire to communicate with her in some way, to cause her to think about me and to feel a bit of pain, regret etc just as I am right now.

Stay strong, guys!
Man never leave the door open for her . This is pure afc dom
 

mikey2012

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Blinkers said:
Day 1.

My girlfriend of 3 years told me that she would like to separate this afternoon. I wasn’t expecting it as we have been discussing buying a house together, having kids and getting married. I suppose it may have been all a little overwhelming for her, although she initiated the conversations to start with. Until she mentioned the whole family scene it hadn’t been at the front of my mind but ever since she did, it’s all I think about. I want to be a father!
Being pig headed I just said “I think if there is going to be this level of ambiguity in our relationship then it’s a good idea to split up and move on.”
Her response was that perhaps this should be a trial separation with a time limit to see how her life is without me in it and vice versa. I just said “no, let’s leave it an open ended break up and whatever will be, will be”

And so she is gone, even took our Goldfish. I will miss flipper, I wonder who he would have chose.

I love her with all my heart but I am not capable of begging since I tried that a few times before in past relationships and it only ever made things worse for me.

I have heard of the no contact rule, never before been strong enough to try it but after a few failed relationships I think I can give it a bash and if nothing else, it’s a new project to concentrate on.

So, no social network memberships (except this) barred telephone number, blocked email and told her I have so I can concentrate on what’s important to me.
If you truly love someone set them free, if they come back then they are yours forever. Be a man and do this and not a beta pvssy who begs and pleads
 

Machtwo

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Lotus Effect said:
Yeah, I know it!
Lotus, DON'T DO IT, read all your quality posts from when you left falcomnetto behind & turned in to the MAN we now call LOTUS


Let her go, move on, set her free from your mind & become LOTUS THE MAGNIFICENT !!! :)
 

Blinkers

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I received a text about an hour ago... From her, but obviously from another mobile number now her's is blocked.

'You deserve so much, so much more than me and I am so sorry that I have confused you with these conflicting emotions. I don't know what to do or say'

So another mobile number now blocked. (Is it a good move to block numbers or is that childish?) The reason I am doing it is to avoid temptation to text back.

Instead of texting her i'll get it out by typing my text here instead.

'I'm not confused, I know exactly what I want. Perhaps one day you will too and you will understand just how clear things are to me right now'
 

Jariel

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Blinkers said:
I received a text about an hour ago... From her, but obviously from another mobile number now her's is blocked.

'You deserve so much, so much more than me and I am so sorry that I have confused you with these conflicting emotions. I don't know what to do or say'

So another mobile number now blocked. (Is it a good move to block numbers or is that childish?) The reason I am doing it is to avoid temptation to text back.

Instead of texting her i'll get it out by typing my text here instead.

'I'm not confused, I know exactly what I want. Perhaps one day you will too and you will understand just how clear things are to me right now'
I'm sure everyone else will agree when I say you're handling it PERFECTLY!

Blocking her number is not childish at all. It's about what's best for you to heal and move on.

Many of us give too much thought to what she is feeling or how she might be perceiving our actions, and that never ends well.

Those temptations to text back can catch you totally offguard at times and usually when you're at your worst, so I say do whatever it takes to stop yourself from doing that.

Keep it up mate!
 

mikey2012

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Day 13

She is still on my mind. I scour Jariels post to keep NC but it's hard. Wonder if she forgot about me. Maybe she has. Just looking for any sign she hasn't.
 

Lotus Effect

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Machtwo said:
Lotus, DON'T DO IT, read all your quality posts from when you left falcomnetto behind & turned in to the MAN we now call LOTUS


Let her go, move on, set her free from your mind & become LOTUS THE MAGNIFICENT !!! :)
Thanks A LOT man! :)

It's a moment of weakness that started by the recent news on her life! I'm still feeling a little down but I'm turning sh*t around again.
She does not deserve ME. I'm awesome!

What happened today was. I had to wake early to go to gym. But I bailed it 'cause I lacked the motivation and felt like sh*t. Then I stormed into my sister's room and told her to never tell me anything about this hor, 'cause I don't wanna know nothing about her life, because she is FVCKING DEAD!!!

Then I bursted into tears, and cryed a lot. I haven't cryed for her for over two months!!

Then I saw Greg Plitt's video Jariel posted in the last page, and I said
"Fvck it. She does not deserve any of this for her. She is out there not giving a fvck about how I am.
To hell with her. She is not going to defeat me"
.
I stoped crying in the same minute, put my sneakers on, and had a hard ass fvcking gym workout.

During the whole train all I had in my mind was "She is not going to defeat me. She is not going to defeat me..."
It Felt great!

Thanks for reminding me of myself Mach! I'm the fvcking Lotus, I will rise from this sh*t!:box:

Blinkers said:
Instead of texting her i'll get it out by typing my text here instead.

'I'm not confused, I know exactly what I want. Perhaps one day you will too and you will understand just how clear things are to me right now'
Awesome man! Very well done! Keep your sh*t together, and to yourself, let her feel the weight of her actions!
Congratz! You acted like a real man! + 1 REP for that man!

mikey2012 said:
Day 13

She is still on my mind. I scour Jariels post to keep NC but it's hard. Wonder if she forgot about me. Maybe she has. Just looking for any sign she hasn't.
Man, one thing you can be right. You had a relationship with her. You had intimacy with her. She will never ever forget about you.

But the thing is. Should you care? And the answer is a big fat NO!

F*ck that sh*t man. I'm well aware of how you feel. And the thing that you should do is not care of what she is thinking or doing.
Is she with you? Is she beging and delcaring her undying love for you? No.

So she is out of your life, and whatever the f*ck she thinks is completely irrelevant to you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wraping all up. Don't let these useless piece of garbage we call Exs win!
Always keep this mantra in mind. Whenever you are feeling down, repeat as many times are necessary:

"SHE IS NOT GOING TO DEFEAT ME!"

After that, you just don't let her.

Keep it strong Guys! :up:
 

drakeramore

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Day# 17

Bad day for me too, Lotus. :)

Thought a lot about her and especially about what her motives were to contact me at the end of last week. I cannot help but admit that although I have deleted her phone number and have removed her from my social network profiles I am still waiting for her to contact me and hope strongly that she does.

Wonder a lot if she is happy, if the thought of the times we shared with her cross her mind or if she is busy being too excited with her new bf and new job and getting used to the lifestyle in a different (and more beautiful) country.

The latter thought is causing me to die inside little by little and I have to admit I feel irrelevant and not worthy at times during the day. It is as if that new guy is giving her things I was unable to.

Now I have no idea if that is true or not and if he is better than me but at my lowest and weakest moments I am positive it is a fact and get down on myself even more.

It does not help that I have no one but a buddy of mine and my mother to talk to about this sh!t and during the whole facking day at work I need to keep up appearances and not show what I am going through. Living the whole day with that mask on is tiring.

Anyway, writing here seems to help me a bit even though checking this site daily perpetuates this feeling of loss it seems like as I continue on thinking about her.

Perhaps the only solution is to find a new girl and until I do I will be crumbling as I am these days. I have a lot of days still ahead of me.

Thanks for reading, guys.

On to day #18.
 

narcissist

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i need your help guys please read

i cannot stop looking at my ex's tumblr account because she posts stuff about me on there and its FEEDING MY EGO but i need to DEFEAT MY EGO in the battle against rationalism and egotism.

i know that it is rational to not look at her tumblr, but i cant help it my EGO desires and yearns to look at it...

PLEASE HELP ME I NEED TO STOP
 
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