Suave1's Approach/Dating Journal

[DEEZEDBRAH]

You're absolutely right. In the past I have put way too much weight on girls that if I didn't approach, it would ruin my day. Now, as you said, I'm working on getting past that. I will admit though, it's hard sometimes.

I think one reason why it's so hard is there's so toxicity surrounding pickup. It's not hard to find it on this forum, and oftentimes getting rejected/ghosted by girls really sucks. There's not one place you can turn and get comforting praise sometimes it seems. Even the coaches want to sell you their product and will prey on your insecurities/sell you false hope of what's possible.

That's why I really appreciate everyone who responds to my log. You @DEEZEDBRAH , and also @Çharismo, @eli77 @Don Dark Horse @Modern Man Advice @mikedee @SW15 @mrskinnypantz .... yall real ones.

I hope to make everyone who reads this say wow, if that guy can do it, literally anyone can(with enough work).

There's far too much armchair footy but never kicked a ball in their life. You see it on YT. Dweeb shilling ebook or rubbish programs. No infield or receipts. Can't pull. Hasn't approached in decades.

+1 respect. Big ups!

Shout out @darksprezzatura who is on his purpose. Playboy is doing it right. Act accordingly. It's not about the girl or pulling and playing house. It's the long game. Stay on the grind. 3 approach minimum a day. Stack like in the gym. Get paper right. Level up. I went super sayain in pandemic. Hope you are too.

MEDITATE. For all the hate rsd Ty gets, meditation be it active or guided is king. Chase self actualization. Not girls. Take your shot. Just cause. Life's too ****in boring not to try.

The approach is just a skill set. Pull. But set priorities. I pissed away a decade on pickup. Women aren't that important. Most are ran through and a liability. But my D won't suck itself. 110% of my time is aimed at purpose. I run game just as a hobby. It's fun. Pickup is funny. Self amuse. Everything from pickup rejection pulling ghosting etc is all funny!

Wtf else is the alternative? You got this playboy. #nextset! Get the bag. Cultivate not just game but a lifestyle so great that you're indifferent to what women think or do.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Chase self actualization. Not girls. Take your shot. Just cause. Life's too ****in boring not to try.

BUMP

 

[Suave1]

There's far too much armchair footy but never kicked a ball in their life. You see it on YT. Dweeb shilling ebook or rubbish programs. No infield or receipts. Can't pull. Hasn't approached in decades.

+1 respect. Big ups!

Shout out @darksprezzatura who is on his purpose. Playboy is doing it right. Act accordingly. It's not about the girl or pulling and playing house. It's the long game. Stay on the grind. 3 approach minimum a day. Stack like in the gym. Get paper right. Level up. I went super sayain in pandemic. Hope you are too.

MEDITATE. For all the hate rsd Ty gets, meditation be it active or guided is king. Chase self actualization. Not girls. Take your shot. Just cause. Life's too ****in boring not to try.

The approach is just a skill set. Pull. But set priorities. I pissed away a decade on pickup. Women aren't that important. Most are ran through and a liability. But my D won't suck itself. 110% of my time is aimed at purpose. I run game just as a hobby. It's fun. Pickup is funny. Self amuse. Everything from pickup rejection pulling ghosting etc is all funny!

Wtf else is the alternative? You got this playboy. #nextset! Get the bag. Cultivate not just game but a lifestyle so great that you're indifferent to what women think or do.

Great post. I agree completely with everything you said; you summed it up perfectly. Game is honestly a **** ton of fun. I don't just do it for the girls, I do it to improve myself, remove all my anxiety and fears, and become the best version of myself. And I hope to inspire everyone who reads this log to go out and kick the football, not just watch kicking and dribbling tutorials online.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Great post. I agree completely with everything you said; you summed it up perfectly. Game is honestly a **** ton of fun. I don't just do it for the girls, I do it to improve myself, remove all my anxiety and fears, and become the best version of myself. And I hope to inspire everyone who reads this log to go out and kick the football, not just watch kicking and dribbling tutorials online.

It's fun. It's work and it's a time suck. It is a form of suffering. The gym initially or doing road work. Hitting the pavement. The hardest part is starting. Learn to love the pain. Take your lumps. Embrace the pain. Self amuse. Find something funny. The **** is the alternative? Cultivate living it up. Be that guy. Bruce Lee once said immortality is in living a life worth remembering.

 

[Suave1]

Day 10
2 approaches
Approach 1: 8/10. She was sitting down, and I went up to her and said my thing. She seemed a bit caught off guard(she was a freshman). We talked about majors, where she was from, and then I got her number. I think I probably could have teased a bit more. Also, I shook her hand in the beginning but did not shake her hand at the end. Opportunity for more kino there.

Approach 2: 10/10. I walked around my campus for about 25 minutes trying to find someone to approach. Unfortunately, I passed about 5 opportunities in the meantime, and this made me anxious. Whenever I don't go for what I want(via approaches) my next approach is not great, I've experienced. In this approach, I literally recited the opening lines. No passion, no body language... just not good. She said she had a boyfriend. She was insanely fine though. No regrets even though I did perform well.

Had a date tonight that was canceled by the girl, I went to the gym instead.

Question for forums: How do you guys ensure peak performance on every approach? Is this even possible?

 

[DonJuanjr]

Whenever I don't go for what I want(via approaches) my next approach is not great, I've experienced.

I've noticed this domino effect also. Though pushing through it can lead to a good one. There was this one tall chick that I approached, and had good vibe with. She was married, and I don't have the skill yet to navigate those waters to turn it into something. This was after a few hesitations that day.

 

[Suave1]

Day 11
3 approaches! Great day
Approach 1: 8/10. I'm really happy about this one. From afar, she did not look that hot. I was walking by and she was sitting down. As I was passing, she made eye contact with me twice. I walked past her, and thought to myself "She isn't that hot, but gave me heavy IOIs so **** it"... anyways, she is hot! The approach went great, and she literally went for a hug with me. Areas for improvement - escalate on a hook like that - instadate!
Approach 2: 8.5/10. She has a banging body. I was waiting for my food and she was sitting down in the food court. I said my line and she really liked it! So I asked if I could join her for lunch, so we basically had an instadate. It went well, and we ended with hugging. She seems to want a relationship though so let's see how it goes. I'm going to escalate harder.
Approach 3: 7.5/10. Not my best approach... I wasn't feeling great but saw the opportunity and went for it. Still got her number but I was a little awkward.

Something I observed yesterday is if I get excited about the approach and the girl, I perform better. Have a date for tomorrow that may cancel, her texting doesn't indicate interest.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Ok first off good work getting the approaches done it takes a lot of balls to do what you are doing and a lot of guys cant hack it

I am a little bit concerned at how you are valuing these girls , nearly everyone is an 8/9/10

I could be wrong but i seriously doubt there are that any 10's on a uni campus ...... to give you some perspective a 10 should be a unicorn naturally beautiful , naturally big t1ts , natural hair ,cute style, white toenails , deep personality , funny , loyal and modest

Yea that's how rare a 10 should be honestly a man should be lucky to meet a real "10" maybe once in his lifetime

similar story for 9's although you should perhaps allow for one or two imperfections

A lot of girls you meet will likely fall somewhere between a 6 & 7 remember that don't overvalue her ......because most of these women have very little to offer other than physical traits which when you look at women on the whole really aren't that rare


Your openers just feel as though they are a little awkward and forced , the best cold approaches aren't cold approaches they are lukewarm approaches where you at least have a semi genuine excuse to be interacting with her

For example you see a girl in the library , ask what she is reading / studying ?

You see a girl in a coffee shop , ask if she knows what the food is like in this place ?

From these lukewarm openers you can expand , You get the idea

Don't just jump on random girls walking down the street its incredibly difficult to make these approaches look non scripted unless you have a genuine question and even then its tough

 

[Çharismo]

@Suave1

Keep it going ma G!!!

Your doing better than 99% of the population.

 

[Suave1]

Day 12
1 approach today. Wanted to do more, but had some anxiety
Approach 1: 7/10. Prior to this, I was walking around for 45 minutes trying to get a good approach and dealing with my approach anxiety. She was sitting down on a bench alone(easiest approach ever), so I went over and said hi. My opener wasn't perfect, but I managed to get through the set and get her number. She was very receptive over text, but she is only on campus 1 day a week, so I have a week's lead time to see her. I will ping her on Friday and see if I can get her out on the weekend if she's super receptive. If not, next week it is.

I cancelled the date I had planned. She honestly wasn't that hot and wasn't too receptive over text, so I said I'm sick(sort of true - I don't feel 100%) and said I'll get back to you. The way I look at these situations is, if I'd rather spend the time working or studying than going out with her, I'm not going to preform at my best on the date regardless. Open for discussion on that though. I have 2 dates planned for tomorrow!!!

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Ok first off good work getting the approaches done it takes a lot of balls to do what you are doing and a lot of guys cant hack it

I am a little bit concerned at how you are valuing these girls , nearly everyone is an 8/9/10

I could be wrong but i seriously doubt there are that any 10's on a uni campus ...... to give you some perspective a 10 should be a unicorn naturally beautiful , naturally big t1ts , natural hair ,cute style, white toenails , deep personality , funny , loyal and modest

Yea that's how rare a 10 should be honestly a man should be lucky to meet a real "10" maybe once in his lifetime

similar story for 9's although you should perhaps allow for one or two imperfections

A lot of girls you meet will likely fall somewhere between a 6 & 7 remember that don't overvalue her ......because most of these women have very little to offer other than physical traits which when you look at women on the whole really aren't that rare


Your openers just feel as though they are a little awkward and forced , the best cold approaches aren't cold approaches they are lukewarm approaches where you at least have a semi genuine excuse to be interacting with her

For example you see a girl in the library , ask what she is reading / studying ?

You see a girl in a coffee shop , ask if she knows what the food is like in this place ?

From these lukewarm openers you can expand , You get the idea

Don't just jump on random girls walking down the street its incredibly difficult to make these approaches look non scripted unless you have a genuine question and even then its tough

In my experience, with my personality style and the culture where I am, girls appreciate a direct approach with a friendly smile and good body language. The college that I go to is ranked as having some of the most beautiful girls in the country I genuinely think that the approaches I do are at that level. For the record, I have to see on average 8-10 girls to see one I am interested in approaching. So I'm passing up a lot of approaches on girls I'm honestly just not excited about. My uni is big enough that as long as I'm doing 10 approaches a week it's physically impossible to approach even half of the hot girls.

@Suave1

Keep it going ma G!!!

Your doing better than 99% of the population.

Thank you brother! Just gotta keep going.

 

[Suave1]

Day 13
What a day!! Keep reading...
Approach 1: 6/10. From afar she looked hot, but was actually pretty trash close up. Nice body though. Not my best approach because I was caught off guard from that. I didn't hook her properly by vibing and said my opener a bit too quickly. She was impressed with me in the rapport phase when I said my job and what my plans are, but in the end, she said she had a boyfriend.
Approach 2: 8/10. She was sitting down. My opener was a little rushed and I went into rapport building too quickly, but I felt like I did an ok job. I was super nervous on this approach for some reason. I think it was because I was in a pretty crowded place and it was hard to drown out everyone around me. I have to work on that. She said she has a boyfriend but I got her IG.

Now for the good stuff. I had 2 dates yesterday.
Date 1: Approach from Tuesday(the idate). It started off by meeting in the library for "studying together". The first thing I noticed is she was extremely nervous; I think she's inexperienced. We studied for about 30 minutes of the hour and talked the other 30 mins. I don't think this date went perfect because I could have kino'd more. Screening basically. I texted her 6 hours later and I said I had fun and want to see her again, she seemed a bit distant. I'll try to get her for another date at my place.

Date 2: Approach from Tuesday. We met for coffee(first date). I gave her a big hug when we met and started touching her immediately. We sat after getting coffee and she was all over me! I was holding her hand when talking. I basically did a LOT of kino the entire time, and sat diagonal to her as opposed to across from her. I went for the kiss 25 minutes in and got it. Afterward, I said "I risked embarrassment right there" and she laughed a lot. We were on my campus in a secluded corner at a table. We talked for more and I was basically cuddling her in chairs at that point. At this point, I'm over the moon, but it gets better. I said I need to go(I didn't but I don't like to make my dates more than an hour) and she suggested for us to walk to our cars together since we were parked in a similar place. We walk together, and when we get to my car I start kissing her. I pull her into my car and we made out for 30 minutes. Wanted to go for a bj but my windows aren't tinted and we were in a school parking lot. At one point I moved her down on the seat to hide her a bit and sucked on her nipples. I tried to get her to go back to my place but she had somewhere to be in 30 mins(meeting her dad haha). She is going on vacation this weekend, so I'm going to try to get her to meet up Monday or Tuesday. I texted her 5 hours later saying I had a nice time and she said the same. Hoping that she keeps her same intentions over the vacation and we can meet up and I can convert her to fwb! All in all, amazing memory and one of many more to come. I'm going to implement the "walk back to car" part from now on with girls who are pretty handsy from now on I think.

By the way: I leave a lot out of these reports out of respect for the reader. I know it takes time to read them. If you want more details on any approaches or dates, just let me know.

 

[Suave1]

Also, a thing I learned today, want to save it: When you're done with your work or your in a transition period between work, the urge is to check Instagram or email. Avoid that and just stare off into space and think about what you have to do. This gets you focused on your actions and keeps you off social media(avoids impulse).

 

[CollegeMan22]

Day 6
Solid day. 3 approaches
Approach 1: 7/10. My first approach in a few days and boy I was nervous. I walked around for an hour prior to this searching for the "right" approach. I gave myself a mental pep talk before going in lol. I opened with my usual opener and it went great!

Out of curiosity, what is your usual opener? You have a great thread so far, keep it up! It is very helpful to me as a freshman in university who is starting the process of breaking down my approach fears.

 

[Suave1]

Day 14
0 approaches. The campus was mostly empty(it was Friday). I walked around for 30 minutes and wasn't feeling great, so I didn't approach. I had a few opportunities though. I need to work on that - basically approaching when I don't feel like it.

Met with long time FWB in the night
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Out of curiosity, what is your usual opener? You have a great thread so far, keep it up! It is very helpful to me as a freshman in university who is starting the process of breaking down my approach fears.

Hi excuse me?(get attention) I'm (walking that way/going to class/meeting a friend) but I saw you and I thought you were cute(smile here), and I wanted to come say hi

 

[Suave1]

Day 15
Not a great day
Approach 1: 6/10. I was pretty nervous, not gonna lie. I walked around for like 45 minutes looking for the "perfect" approach(which doesn't exist, I was being a *****). My opener was good, but I feel like I wasn't great at building rapport. Her personality was pretty dry too. I got nervous when going for the close for some reason. She never responded to me after I got her number.

I was feeling pretty unconfident in myself to start the week. I know this sounds like bull**** to some people, but when I do nofap, I have a lot of confidence. When I fap the days before(as I did a few times over the weekend - and had sex once... was not a good weekend), I don't have coplete confidence. I don't think it's fapping related, I think it's related to the perception of myself. Going to work on nofap more this week.

I'm going to go out tomorrow and try again.

 

[Suave1]

Day 16
Mindset was still off, but I got 2 approaches
Approach 1: 6.5/10. She was sitting down, it was a pretty easy approach. My opener was not as tight as it usually is. I talked a bit too much about what she was doing instead of going into rapport questions. She wasn't my type of girl though, was super into church and Christianity(I have nothing against those people - they just don't have casual sex). This got me turned off, but I went for the close anyway. She said she doesn't give out her number(ouch), but will say hi to me if I see her around. Not really that big of a deal - I conquered my fear on that approach which is what I'm happy about.

Approach 2: 7/10. It took me 1 HOUR of walking around to get this one in. Approach anxiety was a ***** and I missed like 6 approaches. She was sitting down. This one went actually pretty well, but she was super shy. I got her number and have texted her to set up a date. She lives super far from campus so I'm going to see her next Monday when she has classes. I went for the date off-campus but she said on-campus would be more convenient.

Had a coffee date from last week that was cancelled for today. She gave a stupid reason(being busy) and didn't offer to reschedule, so next!

The past couple of days have definitely tested my inner game. Strangely enough, I am pretty fine experiencing rejection. I process it by saying(genuinely) it's her loss because I know I'm high value(I make a lot of money for my age(over $120k/year), stay fit, have a bright future). I know objectively this is true, but I still struggle with girls thinking I'm 'weird' for approaching. That is something I'm working on for sure. But it's strange - why am I thinking that? Almost all of my approaches go pretty well, so it's in my head. It's also a problem of seeing the girls I've approached around campus. But this is rare - my campus is huge. But I flatter them by going up to them, so why should I care? I make their day.

Question for forums: What do girls think of guys who approach? (assuming it's done well and the guy is attractive)

 

[Suave1]

Day 17
4 approaches! I went hard to get over my loser mindset

Approach 1: 6.5/10. She was sitting down. My approach was decent; I should have done more push and pull. I got her number so it went ok I guess, but she wasn’t that hot, so I’m not too excited about seeing her again. I’m texting her a bit but I don’t know if I’m going to ask her out.

Approach 2: 7/10. This was a funny one lol, I literally stopped her walking and delivered my opener. That felt good. Rapport went really well actually. I don’t know if she just didn’t like me or what, but I could tell she didn’t really take me seriously when I went for the close. Got her number but she hasn’t texted me back yet. Not that big of a deal.

Approach 3: 9/10. This was a fun one. She was hot and sitting down(easiest approach ever lol). She had a boyfriend though. I think that one went well.

Approach 4: 5.5/10. I was walking to my car and this girl was giving me IOIs, so I said screw it why not. She wasn’t that hot but my approach was actually pretty great. Did some push/pull, rapport went good too. She did the up down scan with her eyes at the end(sign of being turned on). I got her number but honestly I don’t think I’m going to text her much. I feel like I’m spoiled with great sex from my FWB(who is an 8/10) that if I’m not super excited about a girl… I just don’t go after her. Question for forums: Is that a bad idea? Is it impeding my progress if I’m only going after girls I really want to get with?

I have a date tomorrow with the girl I made out with last week. Hoping for the best!!

Looking back, I’m really happy with how the day went. I really went hard. I have to work on my mindset when approaching. My hypothesis is thinking something like “I’m going to meet my next fun fwb” is a good affirmation to think while walking up to the girls. I’ll experiment and report back.

 

[Suave1]

Day 17
3 approaches.
Approach 1: 8.5/10. Not my best approach because I was nervous. I went up and did my approach, and she said she had a boyfriend. This approach was delivered better than some of my approaches earlier in the week though.

Approach 2: 7.5/10. This was fun. She was sitting down and I went in, and she hooked instantly. She said I’m very handsome so that was a good sign. Got her number and am texting her now.

Approach 3: 8.5/10. This approach was set up perfectly so I was like **** it why not. She was sitting down, and I was walking past. She had a boyfriend.

Something I think I need to work on a little more is my presence when approaching. I need to approach with more authority. One example is a person stopping someone who dropped their wallet. Maybe it's just a result of my mindset being a little messed up this week.

Went on a date today with the same girl I made out last week. This one was pretty much a repeat of the first date. We got coffee then talked for a bit, then I took her to my car and made out a lot. I asked to take her back to my place and she was putting up resistance. As I’ve learned on YT videos, you overcome this not by just keep kissing her, but my stepping back and dealing with whatever she is thinking. So we talked for 45 minutes about what she wants, what I want, and who we are as people. I told her that I want FWB so let’s see what happens. She was SO turned on when I was kissing her. Her legs were literally shaking when I was rubbing her pants from the outside. We don’t have another meetup set but we texted after she went home a bit.


Meeting my long time FWB tomorrow night.

 

[Çharismo]

@Suave1

First off your killing it Ma G!!!! Keep up the haaard work!!!!

Question for forums: What do girls think of guys who approach? (assuming it's done well and the guy is attractive)

As for your question it really doesn’t matter what a girl thinks about you approaching. You shouldn’t care anyways because you will get a bunch of mixed opinions and women will say one thing but respond to something completely different. Go by actions not words. The most important thing is that you are taking initiative and taking control of your life. Your living life on your terms and going after what you want. The more you keep going the more you will achieve sexual prosperity and become the man women dream about. Enjoy the journey and keep the pimp hand strong!!!!

 

[Suave1]

Day 18
Sorry everyone I missed posting on Friday! 1 approach. The campus was pretty empty so it was harder to find hot girls.
Approach 1: 6.5/10. I was pretty exhausted because I literally walked for an hour before seeing her. A lot of me walking around was overcoming approach anxiety. I chickened out on about 5 girls before her. The conversation was actually really good, and she was into me from her body language, but she said she had a boyfriend.

Day 19
0 approaches.
Unfortunately I couldn't work myself up to it today. I used porn over the weekend, and had sex once, and my sex drive was pretty low. I'm upset at myself for that.

However, I did have a date that went really well! We met for coffee. The date started with us talking about school, her schedule, and her classes. Then we talked about what we want to do with our lives. After that(this is my signature move right here), I asked what tv shows she likes to watch. Then, I said "Show me" and I moved my chair and sat right next to her(I was previously sitting across from her). After that, I escalated a lot by touching her arm and her leg periodically for the next 30 minutes, and had my hand around her shoulder for a bit as well. Then I went for the kiss! She said no at first, because she was nervous. As soon as I pulled away, I said "I risked embarrassment right there" with a smile and she talked about kissing a bit. We talked chilly for 10 more minutes(same kino as before) and then I asked her to walk me back to my car to go home. We talked normally while walking, and then when we were back, I kissed her in front of my car, then told her to get in the car so it's "more private". We made out for 15 minutes!! I was so ****ing proud of myself. I then went for the pull but she said "not on the first date"... I'm working on researching how to get around that. Because obviously, she was into me, it's just a mental block she has somehow.
That's my new go to date for sure. Basically, coffee, play it cool for 15 minutes, then start escalating.
I have my FWB tomorrow, and also have another girl as well. 2 dates on the same day!! Will report back.
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@Suave1

First off your killing it Ma G!!!! Keep up the haaard work!!!!
As for your question it really doesn’t matter what a girl thinks about you approaching. You shouldn’t care anyways because you will get a bunch of mixed opinions and women will say one thing but respond to something completely different. Go by actions not words. The most important thing is that you are taking initiative and taking control of your life. Your living life on your terms and going after what you want. The more you keep going the more you will achieve sexual prosperity and become the man women dream about. Enjoy the journey and keep the pimp hand strong!!!!

You are absolutely right brother. It's hard sometimes because of the rejection and ghosting(ghosting hurts more than rejection on the approach imo), but it's worth it. Just look at the success the last 7 days compared to when I started the log. One thing I'm thinking about now is that pickup isn't a rollercoaster(meaning hot streaks/cold streaks), a lot of it is like growing up riding rollercoasters. When you begin(aka when you're young), you get denied from a lot of rollercoasters because you're too short. But you start growing, and you can slowly ride more rollercoasters(meaning handle more situations in game). However, sometimes you are thrown a tough situation out of the blue, without picking it. In this case, just like you are riding the biggest rollercoaster, you will get denied and lose until you are tall enough. I feel like that's what pickup really is - building your skill, getting wins along the way(easy to ride rollercoasters), and building your value until you can ride even the best rollercoasters. You are absolutely right in your response - I'm taking control of my own life and changing the narrative. Building my value. Thank you for reading my log and replying to me bro, it means a lot.