Meeting up with EX tomorrow after over a year - Advice needed as im already in another relationship.

SW15

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I have seen examples of Millennial women with good careers who are socially inept. While their social ineptitude would not keep them from getting laid, their social ineptitude could prevent them from getting longer term, committed relationships.
Yes, a lot of these women are on the apps and it is pretty easy to spot them after having experience dealing with them.

1). Any medium to large sized dog or more than one dog
2). Has any auntie shvt posted on their bio
3). Constant travelling to Thot locations or excessive weekend trips
4). Has something praising Tacos/Margs or Wine on their bios
5). Pics include a lot of gatherings at other weddings
6). Obsessed with brunching

Yes, I seem paranoid, but I have figured these girls to be huge time wasters and a pain in the @$$.
This is all true among women in the dating market, especially on apps. I saw all that stuff on apps.

When I wrote what I wrote above, I had both unattached women and the women who are girlfriends/wives of people in my social sphere in mind. The girlfriends/wives in my social sphere aren't on the dating market, but we can evaluate them by the 6 criteria based on the Facebook/Instagram pages and their own personal habits.

Multiple girlfriends/wives in the social sphere have 1+ medium to large dogs in their households.

There was a phase where these girlfriends/wives in the social circle were obsessed with weddings because a bunch of them got married within a 2-3 year period of each other. Now these women are either new moms or currently pregnant.

I've seen some social media posts from the girlfriends/wives in my social sphere with weekend trips, praise for tacos/margs, and I know some did some amount of brunching pre-pandemic.
 

CyrusTheGreat

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Listen. If you guys want to keep around insecure neurotic women? Carry on as you are doing.

But understand something. Think of high value people like college students at Harvard. It’s an exclusive group and very few people qualify. But if you are a Harvard grad? You have your choice of top opportunities out in the world and you command top dollar. If you have elite value in the SMP you also have your choices among the best mating options. And a man who will run around on a lesser chick will seek to Lock. You. Down. And he might mate guard too. You see he’s been around as a sought after man. He knows what’s up. And he also knows there are many many men who would love to get the girl he has because she is RARE and therefore valuable.

So he knows if he wants to stay partnered to a great woman? He is loyal. Just as he will accept nothing less, neither will she.

When you pull all this plate spinning game stuff and refuse to be loyal yourself?

Congratulations. You are selecting against quality and selecting for the trash. No wonder some of you don’t think quality women exist. You’ve screened them out already. Great news for a solid man who knows quality when he sees it.
This is pure BS. I studied in an ivy league university and am currently working in another. The girls in such places are pure trash. They're woke, entitled, bitchy, need no man, know it all independent wymen. If you want a feminine woman who is willing follow a man's lead and have a family and raise children like an actual mother, good luck finding one in Harvard or any other top uni.
 

SW15

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Think of high value people like college students at Harvard. It’s an exclusive group and very few people qualify. But if you are a Harvard grad? You have your choice of top opportunities out in the world and you command top dollar. If you have elite value in the SMP you also have your choices among the best mating options. And a man who will run around on a lesser chick will seek to Lock. You. Down. And he might mate guard too. You see he’s been around as a sought after man. He knows what’s up. And he also knows there are many many men who would love to get the girl he has because she is RARE and therefore valuable.
This is pure BS. I studied in an ivy league university and am currently working in another. The girls in such places are pure trash. They're woke, entitled, bitchy, need no man, know it all independent wymen. If you want a feminine woman who is willing follow a man's lead and have a family and raise children like an actual mother, good luck finding one in Harvard or any other top uni.
@CyrusTheGreat, I sense you are taking @BeExcellent too literally there. To me, it seems like her point was that a physically attractive woman with a good attitude is the sexual marketplace equivalent of the collegiate/work life of a Harvard student/Harvard alumni.

With that said, if we are evaluating the sexual market value of an Ivy League woman and Ivy League alumnas, the things that you say are accurate. Most aren't very dateable.
 
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Careerist women do not always amount to "quality women." There are plenty out there who are; but there are plenty who aren't and make very lousy LTR partners.
The vast majority of women suck plain and simple. Some men have preferences like some guys prefer young NEET women they can dominate. Me, I'm more independent and need my space, so I need a careerist type woman that is independent herself and can hold her own while I do my own thing once in a while. I'm sure there's a perfect young NEET or college girl for me, but I cannot deal with the immaturity gap and I need someone that can relate to my day-to-day life right now. For example, a college girl has no idea how a 9-5 job operates and it's really hard to translate that to her.
 

Barrister

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Listen. If you guys want to keep around insecure neurotic women? Carry on as you are doing.

But understand something. Think of high value people like college students at Harvard. It’s an exclusive group and very few people qualify. But if you are a Harvard grad? You have your choice of top opportunities out in the world and you command top dollar. If you have elite value in the SMP you also have your choices among the best mating options. And a man who will run around on a lesser chick will seek to Lock. You. Down. And he might mate guard too. You see he’s been around as a sought after man. He knows what’s up. And he also knows there are many many men who would love to get the girl he has because she is RARE and therefore valuable.

So he knows if he wants to stay partnered to a great woman? He is loyal. Just as he will accept nothing less, neither will she.

When you pull all this plate spinning game stuff and refuse to be loyal yourself?

Congratulations. You are selecting against quality and selecting for the trash. No wonder some of you don’t think quality women exist. You’ve screened them out already. Great news for a solid man who knows quality when he sees it.
I think there are two schools of thought. One is "plate spinning" where the man has no true ties, is carefree, and tries to maximize the number of women he is sleeping with. The type of woman that is more accepting of this role has certain characteristics. The more insecure and low quality she is the longer she will be willing to remain in "plate status" with a man she perceives as high value (re: higher value than her). So, to this extent, I agree that a woman who is fairly secure and confident is less likely to remain in plate status for a very long time. The other school of thought is, of course, the LTR-centric mindset where you try to sift through females until you find one who checks as many boxes as possible (rarely ALL of the boxes), and you commit to her for a certain period of time and enjoy the benefits that comes with functioning as a couple and the security that having a woman waiting at home brings. Some guys on here believe you can have the best of both worlds through cheating and doing it well. That may be true.

Having done both of the above at different times in my life, I tend to fall more towards the LTR with a quality woman side. However, I can certainly say the most fun I have had in my life is where I was plate spinning. There is something truly exhilerating, and powerful, for a man who can take out multiple, different beautiful women in one week on dates and to different social functions. And people recognize you as a player, but in a way it gives a man an edge over other men. He is acknowledged as ballsy and suave by his peers. From that perspective, "loyalty" as you describe it means nothing. It comes down to what the man is seeking.
 

CyrusTheGreat

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@CyrusTheGreat, I sense you are taking @BeExcellent too literally there. To me, it seems like her point was that a physically attractive woman with a good attitude is the sexual marketplace equivalent of the collegiate/work life of a Harvard student/Harvard alumni.

With that said, if we are evaluating the sexual market value of an Ivy League woman and an Ivy League, the things that you say are accurate. Most aren't very dateable.
@BeExcellent my bad, I misunderstood your post. But still the analogy isn't quite right here.
 

Dr.Suave

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Anyway, low and behold, as soon as she dumped fiance for new guy and became available, new guy dumped her.
I just love a happy ending #InstantKarmaForTheWin
 

BeExcellent

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This is pure BS. I studied in an ivy league university and am currently working in another. The girls in such places are pure trash. They're woke, entitled, bitchy, need no man, know it all independent wymen. If you want a feminine woman who is willing follow a man's lead and have a family and raise children like an actual mother, good luck finding one in Harvard or any other top uni.
Oh brother. It’s a metaphor (that went right over your Ivy League head.)

Im not saying the women at Harvard are themselves quality women. I’m sure everything you said about them is true.

Harvard is EXCLUSIVE. People who have the ability to attend there are RARE in the general population.

Because a Harvard degree is quite prestigious these people have myriad more opportunities than your average graduate.

Truly high value women are similarly RARE. Women who are beautiful, sexy, emotionally stable, kind, non-materialistic, feminine with their life together and worthy partner material are also RARE and this is what every relationship minded man wants. It has nothing to do with being careerist and intelligence required will vary according to an individual man’s taste. I understand exactly what a truly high value woman is to a man. I know many examples (who are married for decades to real alpha type men). And these women understand their value and can require loyalty from an alpha because she is what any ALPHA wants.
 

bobafatt

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You did a good job OP. These guys telling you to bang your crazy ex and risk losing everything are pvssy whipped. I had a similar situation happen to me in the summer and I said no, and she blocked me too lol.

Now the other issue is there are obviously problems with your current GF that you need to resolve. People just don't consider cheating on their "good" partners with their exes unless they aren't over their ex or there's already cracks in the relationship. I have two exes that I'm on speaking terms with, but I would never put myself in a bedroom situation with them lol.
If I'm honest there's no problems with me and my current girl, I just couldn't help myself with my EX - there's still feelings there but I'd never want to jump into the pool that's already been pissed in by getting back into a relationship - she was always going to be my EX, We had a good time but we split up for a reason... I just really wanted to F*** her again. It's been a good few days since she blocked me now and its actually taken the weight off and made me realise how good of a girl i already have.

The problems in the bedroom aren't major with my current girl, I was just a bit more open with my ex. I love going down on a girl and playing with both their holes, the difference there was my ex loved and my current girl not so much.

After a few drinks on Xmas day I brought it up in conversation - She'd told me it was more of a mind over matter thing with her as she's never really experienced a tongue in those places. The Gods must of been looking down on me that day, I pulled out the yes or no dice which i got from the Xmas cracker and bet she'd let me do if the dice said yes.

I wont go into any more detail but she surprised me with how much she enjoyed it.
 

Divorced w 3

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Why are you taking? Don't talk, just do. Alpha does what he wants. Tongue on those places will make her enjoy, every woman, just bend her over without asking and do it. Women don't like guys who ask for permission and much less in the bedroom.



You sound like a guy who doesn't get secs that often and you only get "lucky". That's not the mindset to have, she has to like the things you like in the bedroom, she has to follow you and you have to teach her, otherwise you'll find a side piece who does, but thanking the gods or letting it to chance doesn't sound confident or masculine at all.
I know Mode One drives a lot of ppl up a wall but in this regard, referencing his original book and then Oooh Say it Again will really help. His no holds barred style will work, doesn’t matter if you’re in Crenshaw or talking to Lily Pulitzer yoga pants. You just better be ready to show up :p
 
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If I'm honest there's no problems with me and my current girl, I just couldn't help myself with my EX - there's still feelings there but I'd never want to jump into the pool that's already been pissed in by getting back into a relationship - she was always going to be my EX, We had a good time but we split up for a reason... I just really wanted to F*** her again. It's been a good few days since she blocked me now and its actually taken the weight off and made me realise how good of a girl i already have.
How would you feel if your girl still had feelings for ex and had a secret plan of meeting her? She's your fvcking EX gf, not your ex-wife, not your mom, not your sister. How old are you?
 
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