Deus ex Pianoforte said:
Yeah, Mike. I agree totally. But, that's a completely different subject in my opinion. All the qualities that you described to increase confidence all involved adjusting your appearance. Clothes, hair, musculature, hygiene...all fall under the realm of appearance. Looks, on the other hand are not so easily changed. Without the help of a plastic surgeon or some serious vitamin supplements, your facial proportions, bone structure, body frame, and height aren't gonna change much.
Some of these guys' argument is, therefore, that if you're unattractive/average, you're forever doomed to date unattractive/average chicks for life no matter what you do. (Unless you get a plastic surgeon to fix your face, of course.)
I don't know why that reply appeared in this
this thread. I thought I was bumping up one of skip's threads where he explained his view of confidence with women being related back to confidence in your looks. My post seems kind of strange, stuck out there all by itself.
Deus, if you read up just a couple of posts above it, I outline my views on the looks thing. Yes, I'm one of those people who believes unattractive - but not
average - looks means you won't be scoring the highest rated babes, pretty much ever. I know it's not what people want to hear, but I honestly believe it. My advice therefore is if you are unattractive is to forget about trying to become a lifelong dj and to put your efforts into finding a wife, the best one you can pull, which is, of course, going to require you to do virtually all of the stuff that's talked about in the bible etc. Even unattractive guys I believe will on occasion score far higher than their looks would normally allow (whether this means 8s, I'm not sure, but 7s seems possible). They should aim at becoming the kind of guy that can
keep these women, because life isn't going to offer them too many chances to do much better. Looking back through my life, the unattractive (not just average, I mean really unattractive - which is rare) guys who scored way above their looks all did it through social circles, in which they could "demonstrate high value"
over time (these guys
did have killer personalities), not because of dj skills. Lesson? If you are unattractive, don't move out of your town, because it's going to be difficult to rebuild that social circle in which your high value (assuming you have high value) has been recognized. I mean, life is short, if you have to rebuild from scratch, precious years are awasting.
But alright, for all that I admit that
some unattractive guys might, somehow, be able to become crackerjack djs, constantly pulling babes way better looking than themselves. I have never known anybody that fits that description, not even close. But let's say it's
possible. Does that mean it's
likely? In my opinion, no. It would probabaly be the equivalent of making it in to pro sports. So if you think how difficult it is to become a pro basketballer or a pro golfer, then that's probably how hard it's going to be to become an unattractive dj who pulls hot babes on a regular basis.
And lastly, yeah, I think plastic surgery
is a good option. Why the hell not? People are going to spend thousands and thousands of dollars on clothing, on footwear, on accessories, all with the view to
looking better, when it's probably just simpler to save some money on
that stuff and do something that goes to the
heart of the matter and improve their faces. Case in point, I had a friend (well, friend's brother) who had this really big nose, and not only that, it was crooked, too. Totally, totally detracted from his looks. I don't know anyone that didn't behind his back crack a joke about it. Another guy, kind of attractive, I would say, to some girls, until he opened his mouth -
huge gap between his teeth. Again, the butt of jokes. One trip to the plastic surgeon is all it would have required to fix this stuff. But some people would prefer to live in denial, believing in those pc fantasies about looks being "only skin deep", or kidding themselves that people aren't noticing. (People aren't noticing?!?! Riiiiiight.)
