Kicked a disrespectful 304 out of my house tonight!

[NealIRC]

Post from another forum:

Girl I met on dating app picked me up from the airport and we smashed (pics)

Met her on dating app and we've been talking for the past month. She lives in a different country (in eastern europe) where I planned to visit so it wasn't possible to meet her for the past month. Yesterday, I arrived in her city and I met her at the airport since she offered to pick me up from the airport.

I was a little in my head when I first met her cause I only had 2 hours of sleep and her body was MUCH better in real life (wide hips, nice tits, nice azz with long fooking legs).

She dropped me off at my airbnb, we met again after 3 hours (she took the bus to my airbnb), and we went to a nearby bar where she paid for my drink (lmao, fuk western sloots.. I'm staying here forever).

I felt really bad at this point cause she picked me up from the airport and paid for drinks as well. So I made sure to eat her puss well with passion when we were back at my place.

I banged 5 new sloots (3 from the club and 2 from dating apps) in the past 7 days so I feel like a complete degen, brahs. Probably gotta get checked for STD very soon.

 

[Canadian_Man]

Here is where I think I fuked up with this situation.

...

Anyway because I was quite tipsy I acted in a way that I normally wouldn't have.

I simply told her, you need to fukin leave right now. I'm not in the mood to argue, get the fuk out!

I seriously think I could have handled things better if only I had not been under the influence of alcohol.

I should have simply let her stay, observed her bratty behaviour and then sent her home in the morning.

You know why I didn't? Because of alcohol.

I think it was starting to go off the tracks before the night began.

Who Should Initiate Sex Most Of The Time?

Been seeing this chick casually for the last 6 weeks. Only meet her once a week at my place Saturday nights. On every occasion it's been me who has made the move for sex to happen. I have initiated 5 times. This gone Saturday I didn't Initiate as I wanted to see if she would make some effort...

www.sosuave.net

You were already annoyed/perturbed/unsettled by the dynamic with her beforehand.

I had a hunch it wasn't going to go all that well.

More prone to acting emotionally in that type of situation.

The alcohol probably didn't help.

And yeah sure, perhaps you could have been more polite to her the night of, waited until morning to boot her.

But, it also sounds like she wouldn't have been that good for you anyways, given her behaviour.

Learn from it, and try to move on.

 

[Foe]

I can relate to the over reaction after drinking, I sympathize with my exes on this one.

As far as her getting ****ty about the phone that's on her. Lets be honest, if the chick was into you should would have done what you asked. She was testing boundaries because she wasn't sure about you. You showed her your weakness and now that she knows it your relationship is screwed. She knows she has control whenever she takes out her phone and she will use it from now on to beat you because it works.

You might ask yourself well how the hell am I supposed to come out on top if shes going to disrespect a perfectly normal request as you had with a sh!ttest in return. The answer is your not. Its designed to make you fail and it works perfectly.

That relationship is done, you might get laid a few more times but it will cost you your sanity. Move on, frankly I think you did the right thing, the 3am thing should have been the couch not the door but ultimately she shouldn't test you like this, that is if she likes you.

This chick is yet another overinflated simp magnet. Teach her the lesson by never speaking to her again, it will setup her next guy for a better run.

 

[member160292]

Ok, I gotta chime in on this thread after reading the responses here.

Yes, OP lost frame prior to her acting like this. She was not testing the boundaries, she already knew she had him by the balls. Check OP’s post history, he‘s a clinger, asking this forum for advice every step of the way because he is afraid to lose a girl. What girls sense from OP is insecurity and incongruence. Many members have tried to help OP in the past, but he ignores his problems and members that have given him constructive criticism. You can lead a horse to water…

 

[member162951]

So yeh chit just escalated. I kinda feel bad about it too, as because of the alcohol I over reacted with anger.

Was she drunk as well? Could her anger be alcohol-fueled same as yours was?

She may feel as badly as you in her sober state, unless she wasn't drinking and sober when she lost her sh*t? Which I find hard to believe.

If her piss poor behavior was alcohol fueled, then consider cutting her some slack. You both could have handled things better.

 

[soulforge]

I can relate to the over reaction after drinking, I sympathize with my exes on this one.

As far as her getting ****ty about the phone that's on her. Lets be honest, if the chick was into you should would have done what you asked. She was testing boundaries because she wasn't sure about you. You showed her your weakness and now that she knows it your relationship is screwed. She knows she has control whenever she takes out her phone and she will use it from now on to beat you because it works.

You might ask yourself well how the hell am I supposed to come out on top if shes going to disrespect a perfectly normal request as you had with a sh!ttest in return. The answer is your not. Its designed to make you fail and it works perfectly.

That relationship is done, you might get laid a few more times but it will cost you your sanity. Move on, frankly I think you did the right thing, the 3am thing should have been the couch not the door but ultimately she shouldn't test you like this, that is if she likes you.

This chick is yet another overinflated simp magnet. Teach her the lesson by never speaking to her again, it will setup her next guy for a better run.

She didn't test me bruv... She didn't pull her phone out at the dinner table.

She did that on the previous 3 occasions. And honestly it wasn't to test me, chicks these days subconsciously do this as they are addicted to social media.

This last weekend, I simply told her I rather you don't use your phone when we eat.

She became combative about it.

Also you are right kicking her out was not a good move, the couch would have been better.

But... Alcohol man.. Alcohol makes you do dumb fvking things!

 

[soulforge]

I know you're thinking about apologizing, but the thing is, if you start apologizing she will start to see you weak, she will never forget about it, will bring it up every occasion she can, and she will start to lose respect for you, happened to me

I'm not going to apologize. I think if she has an ounce of common sense, she would understand that people say/do things when they are drunk that they might not mean.

It was wrong of me to boot her out at that time, but let's face it.. She contributed to getting herself ejected.

 

[soulforge]

Stop…. I appreciate your sentiments on frame etc but I’m pretty sure our man will have plenty of credibility when he never hangs with her again, you can still be the bigger person Btw how trashy is she gonna feel having not only lost this guy but also being treated like he would have if she had just been a decent human being. Don’t ever lose sleep over being a little extra decent

To be honest man, naturally I'm not a cruel person, and I do have the ability of being critical of my own behaviour.

I think a man can make his case, hold a woman accountable with being very cruel about it.

Remember this chick did not respect my boundaries, however she wasn't Satan herself. She had nice caring qualities about her too, otherwise I wouldn't have spent any amount of time with her.

Getting rid of a chick like this is good, however it should be done in a reasonable manner.

 

[soulforge]

Was she drunk as well? Could her anger be alcohol-fueled same as yours was?

She may feel as badly as you in her sober state, unless she wasn't drinking and sober when she lost her sh*t? Which I find hard to believe.

If her piss poor behavior was alcohol fueled, then consider cutting her some slack. You both could have handled things better.

She had around maybe 3 beers or so... I really doubt she was drunk.

 

[Gamisch]

Let's see how this looks from the female pov"

Riiiiing
M: hello
F: Can you please pick me up right now?
M: WHAT its 3.15 at night? Aren't you at Soul's place?
F; yeah yeah but we got into a fight..
M ; what happened?
F: i dont know. Really. We were chilling and having drinks. He made us a burger. I checked my email and he told me to put my phone away. I told him wtf I'm not a child. He got pissed off told me I am disrespectful and next thing you know I was standing outside.
M : wow. For real?

===============================
Not a good look imo.

I know you're thinking about apologizing, but the thing is, if you start apologizing she will start to see you weak, she will never forget about it, will bring it up every occasion she can, and she will start to lose respect for you, happened to me

I dont see how he gained respect by doing this. Feels like after road rage when you first feel like " yeah I showed them I can't be fecked with". But when the anger disappears all that's left is a bad taste.

He won't see her again anyway. And if he does, i wonder what kinda example he sets. You gotta lead by example ,especially with women.

You get what you give. If you cant apologize, you also shouldn't expect an apology from her or other women. That means by default you gotta deal with the same type of hard azz woman every single time. No progress nothing, because there's no room for error and correcting those errors. Just my opinion.

 

[soulforge]

Let's see how this looks from the female pov"

Riiiiing
M: hello
F: Can you please pick me up right now?
M: WHAT its 3.15 at night? Aren't you at Soul's place?
F; yeah yeah but we got into a fight..
M ; what happened?
F: i dont know. Really. We were chilling and having drinks. He made us a burger. I checked my email and he told me to put my phone away. I told him wtf I'm not a child. He got pissed off told me I am disrespectful and next thing you know I was standing outside.
M : wow. For real?

===============================
Not a good look imo.

I dont see how he gained respect by doing this. Feels like after road rage when you first feel like " yeah I showed them I can't be fecked with". But when the anger disappears all that's left is a bad taste.

He won't see her again anyway. And if he does, i wonder what kinda example he sets. You gotta lead by example ,especially with women.

You get what you give. If you cant apologize, you also shouldn't expect an apology from her or other women. That means by default you gotta deal with the same type of hard azz woman every single time. No progress nothing, because there's no room for error and correcting those errors. Just my opinion.

I've never denied for one moment that I could have handled this better.. In-fact in several posts I clearly said I shouldn't have booted her out.

I should waited and politely asked her to leave in the morning, as clearly we are not getting on.

This was exactly my original plan. I had in-fact set my alarm for 10am so when I wake up I would ask her to leave... However once she had gone to bed, I began having some drinks.. It was a long stressful day, so I had more than I usually do.

I was not expecting her to wake up at 3am, while I was kinda drunk and become combative again.

Therefore I asked her to leave... And consider this... I was quite drunk, who knows what level she might have taken her argument with me to. What if it got completely out of hand and the niebours heard shouting and called out the police.

Drunk people can do some stupid azz ****.

Creating that distance by exiting her, may have saved a much serious situation developing that night.

 

[Gamisch]

I've never denied for one moment that I could have handled this better.. In-fact in several posts I clearly said I shouldn't have booted her out.

I should waited and politely asked her to leave in the morning, as clearly we are not getting on.

This was exactly my original plan. I had in-fact set my alarm for 10am so when I wake up I would ask her to leave... However once she had gone to bed, I began having some drinks.. It was a long stressful day, so I had more than I usually do.

I was not expecting her to wake up at 3am, while I was kinda drunk and become compative again.

Therefore I asked her to leave... And consider this... I was quite drunk, who knows what level she might have taken her argument with me to. What if it got completely out of hand and the niebours heard shouting and called out the police.

Drunk people can do some stupid azz ****.

Creating that distance by exiting her, may have saved a much serious situation developing that night.

I dont know if you read your own thread but I am the one giving the most responses haha. But cool, we are back on speaking terms I see . Thats how men role. Duke it out and have a beer afterwards!

Look, I've lived with several women. A woman who just wakes up is a liability. I've learned (the hard way) to cut them some slack when they're really tired or just woken up.

I had a similar situation this same weekend bro! Woke her up because I tried to hit it at night she denied me. She always takes a glass of water to bed. Asked me for some water but I drank it all. So I Offered to get her another glass, "no it oke". Gets more argumentive when I actually go get her some water...silly azz women. Window was wide open and I am a discrete person. So I put the glass of water on the nightstand , turned around and continued sleeping.

10 minutes later I got a " surprise BJ" as an apology...I could "demand respect " and let the situation escalate. Or just shrug my shoulders and let it be.

Creating distance is fine, but there are better ways of doing that.

 

[soulforge]

I dont know if you read your own thread but I am the one giving most responses haha. But cool, we are back on speaking term I see . Thats how men role. Duke it out and have a beer afterwards!

Look, I've lived with several women. A woman who just wakes up is a liability. I've learned (the hard way) to cut them some slack when they're really tired or just woken up.

I had a similar situation this same weekend bro! Woke her up because I tried to hit it at night she denied me. She always atakes a glass of water to bed. Asked me for some water but I drank Offered to get her a another glass "no it oke". Gets more argumentive when I actually go get her some water...silly azz women. Window was wide open and I am a discrete person. So I put the glass of water on the nightstand , turned around and continued sleeping.

10 minutes later I got a " surprise BJ" as an apology...I could "demand respect " and let fge situation escalate. Or just shrug my shoulders and let it be.

Creating distance is fine, but there are better ways of doing that.

But your missing the biggest element here lol I was drunk.

If I was sober I would have handled this so much better, but my azz was drunk, and drunk people do stupid azz things.

Have actually decided to drinking all together, Even though I only have a few drinks on a Saturday night

 

[Barrister]

You get what you give. If you cant apologize, you also shouldn't expect an apology from her or other women. That means by default you gotta deal with the same type of hard azz woman every single time. No progress nothing, because there's no room for error and correcting those errors. Just my opinion.

Normally we agree. On this we don't.

Women almost never completely understand apologies. The problem with an apology here is that SHE is going to view the apology as OP apologizing for not just kicking her out but also for taking a stand on the phone issue. And given the gaslighting she was trying to do before, you can be assured this chick is going to run him through the ringer on everything including phone usage. If he gets back with her after that, there will have been a complete power shift. Better move is to hold fast, stand up for believing in what you said (because while it may come off harsh, he was establishing a needed boundary), and move on.

OP - if she reaches out, you can decide if you keep seeing her. But I think she needs to reach out. If she apologizes for the gaslighting, you can extend a small olive branch and tell her you may have been harsh in throwing her out, but you want to enjoy the time you two have set aside for each other and did not appreciate her gaslighting attempt which you hate in any relationship. My two cents.

 

[Gamisch]

But your missing the biggest element here lol I was drunk.

If I was sober I would have handled this so much better, but my azz was drunk, and drunk people do stupid azz things.

Our speaking term might not last that long cause I'm about to be really blunt once again;

Weak excuse. A man must know how much alcohol he can consume before he'll lose control of self. For me that's ONE glass. No joke. After two glasses that diablo inside of me wakes up. 3 glasses of hard liquor means I am becoming very bad company.

I understand your message though. Yet it's a weak excuse imo.

 

[Gamisch]

Normally we agree. On this we don't.

Women almost never completely understand apologies. The problem with an apology here is that SHE is going to view the apology as OP apologizing for not just kicking her out but also for taking a stand on the phone issue. And given the gaslighting she was trying to do before, you can be assured this chick is going to run him through the ringer on everything including phone usage. If he gets back with her after that, there will have been a complete power shift. Better move is to hold fast, stand up for believing in what you said (because while it may come off harsh, he was establishing a needed boundary), and move on.

OP - if she reaches out, you can decide if you keep seeing her. But I think she needs to reach out. If she apologizes for the gaslighting, you can extend a small olive branch and tell her you may have been harsh in throwing her out, but you want to enjoy the time you two have set aside for each other and did not appreciate her gaslighting attempt which you hate in any relationship. My two cents.

Oke let me say it like this: I am fully aware that apologizing to women generally is a no go. Hence why we say" be unapologetic ".

In this specific case i felt like OP crossed the line. Whether it was his mother father homie or plate, from a human/humanity POV I don't condone such an emotional outburst when someone is completely dependent upon you. Similar like stopping the car and kicking her out on the middle of the road at night. Not my style ( any more).

I admit that once you read the threads together it does paint a different picture of this woman. A picture of a lukewarm interested woman whose not REALLY into him..some suspect this is "just"the Russian girl and if she not ,she is scaringly similar like OP his ex. Ukrainian instead of russian,same age same attitude..so I get it. An apology to such a woman might not hit home because this type of woman might only think and feel in terms of "power". From that pov OP can't afford to lose a millimeter of frame, because one little crack and the whole dam will break immediately and hot young woman will drown him (again).

I geuss that's what comes with(feeling like you're) punching above your weight and thus walking on eggshells..

But oke, most don't agree with me on this. Glad we disagree on shyte, because I am sure imma still got tons to learn here.

 

[Divorced w 3]

When you are wrong, admit it and move forward. It’s the only way men of character operate. That’s an easy one.

For the other petty stuff, that’s up to you. If you want to pull back and let her start coming to you more, etc go for it.

 

[member162951]

"Hey, just wanted to apologize for my role in what went down the other night. I was drunk on my ass and it shouldn't have happened. Hope you made it home okay, take care."

Who gives a fukk what the hell she thinks about it? Some of you guys care too much what women think. OP, you know it was screwed up, it's obvious you feel remorseful, the apology is for you. Because you have a conscience and are a decent human being.

All you can do now is learn from it and move forward.

 

[Barrister]

Oke let me say it like this: I am fully aware that apologizing to women generally is a no go. Hence why we say" be unapologetic ".

In this specific case i felt like OP crossed the line. Whether it was his mother father homie or plate, from a human/humanity POV I don't condone such an emotional outburst when someone is completely dependent upon you. Similar like stopping the car and kicking her out on the middle of the road at night. Not my style ( any more).

I admit that once you read the threads together it does paint a different picture of this woman. A picture of a lukewarm interested woman whose not REALLY into him..some suspect this is "just"the Russian girl and if she not ,she is scaringly similar like OP his ex. Ukrainian instead of russian,same age same attitude..so I get it. An apology to such a woman might not hit home because this type of woman might only think and feel in terms of "power". From that pov OP can't afford to lose a millimeter of frame, because one little crack and the whole dam will break immediately and hot young woman will drown him (again).

I geuss that's what comes with(feeling like you're) punching above your weight and thus walking on eggshells..

But oke, most don't agree with me on this. Glad we disagree on shyte, because I am sure imma still got tons to learn here.

Russian women (I can't speak on Ukrainian) are a special breed. They generally are very submissive and traditional unless you show weakness, and then they will quickly go full rage towards you and are completely unforgiving.

Regardless of this chick's ethnicity, he needed to take a stand to the gas lighting. In a perfect world, that doesn't happen at 3:00 in the morning. But I have kicked a chick out once in the middle of the night for very disrespectful comments (admittedly worse than this). If she is going to run her mouth and act like a b1tch then she is going to be treated like one. If she keeps her mouth shut or better yet apologizes that doesn't happen here. But she woke him up and again wanted to start an argument at 3:00 in the morning. It wasn't like OP randomly woke up and told her to pack her sh1t up due to the earlier behavior. So in this particular case, maybe a bit harsh, but the gaslighting is just completely unacceptable (X2). She earned her boot.

 

[Divorced w 3]

"Hey, just wanted to apologize for my role in what went down the other night. I was drunk on my ass and it shouldn't have happened. Hope you made it home okay, take care."

Who gives a fukk what the hell she thinks about it? Some of you guys care too much what women think. OP, you know it was screwed up, it's obvious you feel remorseful, the apology is for you. Because you have a conscience and are a decent human being.

All you can do now is learn from it and move forward.

Yes, but call her.