Jayer's 100 Approach Journal (Will Finish 100 approaches no matter what)

[Reyaj]

FutureSpartan you are probably right. The thing is that before we met even though she wouldnt answer often when I called she always called me back. Same thing with the texting.

But anyway today I never responded to her text of asking me how I was (it was in response to my sarcastic text message)

So she actually forwards my text back to me which I sent her a few hours ago which again read "oh well sorry for being friendly"

Well I texted her back saying I would call her later if she wanted and she text me back saying "ok"

Well I called a little while ago and she didn't answer. She didn't call me back this time either. I usually texted her after I called but this time I did not.

To my knowledge when we first started talking she didn't return my phone call one time as well and I didn't follow up with a text. Whenever I followed up with text she always called me back.

So I'm going to pretty much say its over with this girl. I'm not going to continue texting because frankly I don't feel like it. The facts are that even though she was a little shady, she did return my calls and messages for the most part and we did eventually end up meeting.

I don't know if its safe to say our coffee date turned her off or that her Interest Level was low before this, or frankly she is just playing games.

I am done playing.

NEXT!

 

[saber]

You seriously need to step out of your own shoes and imagine that you were watching this happen to someone else.

Imagine if

a) some chick you did not want to talk too kept calling you
and if some girl you did like called you- seems obvious

b) you were a third party watching all this happen-you look needy and very desperate

You can't let this get in the way of sarging for other chicks. I know it's hard especially when you are starting but it's worth it. This thread started as jayers 100 steps to succes and ended at...how many approaches have you done?

 

[FutureSpartan]

FutureSpartan you are probably right. The thing is that before we met even though she wouldnt answer often when I called she always called me back. Same thing with the texting.

But anyway today I never responded to her text of asking me how I was (it was in response to my sarcastic text message)

So she actually forwards my text back to me which I sent her a few hours ago which again read "oh well sorry for being friendly"

Well I texted her back saying I would call her later if she wanted and she text me back saying "ok"

Well I called a little while ago and she didn't answer. She didn't call me back this time either. I usually texted her after I called but this time I did not.

To my knowledge when we first started talking she didn't return my phone call one time as well and I didn't follow up with a text. Whenever I followed up with text she always called me back.

So I'm going to pretty much say its over with this girl. I'm not going to continue texting because frankly I don't feel like it. The facts are that even though she was a little shady, she did return my calls and messages for the most part and we did eventually end up meeting.

I don't know if its safe to say our coffee date turned her off or that her Interest Level was low before this, or frankly she is just playing games.

I am done playing.

NEXT!

Don't bother analyzing why she's doin this sh*t. You will go crazy man.

The simple reason she's doing this cause she's not interested. End of Story...now go work on other girls more worthy of your time.

 

[Reyaj]

You are right but the thing is I know there was some interest level. I mean she did call me back and even though she blew me off twice we did eventually meet up for a date. If I felt this girl was worth it maybe I would have tried something more. I mean my whole conflcit with the DJ fundamentals is that it doesn't get you laid. Its so easy to say Next and if a girl isn't worth it like this one it is probably the best approach. However saying next doesn't get you laid.

I always like to see what I did wrong so that I can improve for next time.

BTW yesterday I sent her a text message "you need glasses"

lol she responded back saying

"what?"

I never responded. This girl is stupid cause on a looks scale I'm way better than her. She just does the whole make up thing but I saw right through that. What the hell is this girl thinking!

 

[Reyaj]

bump

 

[DJ naruto]

Dude, I just came across your journal, and I must say that I like it. Good stuff. Ok, onwards with my opinion.:wave:

You are right but the thing is I know there was some interest level.

Yes, there was something about you that she liked. Since, you didn't talk to her for a long time, I'm assuming it was your confidence in approaching.

I mean she did call me back and even though she blew me off twice we did eventually meet up for a date. If I felt this girl was worth it maybe I would have tried something more.

Whether she is worth it is for you to decide. If you simply want the shag rockon it doesn't hurt to call her off and on when you are not busy. However, and thats a big HOWEVER, please talk to other girls and get more numbers. This way if she answers or not, meets with you or not, it would not phase you.

I'm telling you this because its what I do. I could care less about the chick thinks or what others think, I call when I want to. However, I don't call only her I have a whole bunch of other numbers that I work on simultaneously.

I met a girl at the musuem, a russian chick. Hot! gamed her and got her number. First month she never picked up or responded. I'd send ****y funny messages whenever I was doing something cool or when I felt like it. I never told her to call me back. This way, it would seem like I was just amusing myself calling her. Eventually, she picked up and we talked. Turns out the reason she didn't call was because she had a boyfriend. (same thing with my prior gf) Then she started doing what your chick was doing. I just stayed funny. She texted me out of the blue at night one time. Ehem. I knew i had her. we chatted set up date. she showed but i was late so she left pissed. I called her and convinced her to meet for another date. We met. I showed her a jolly good time. No money I'm too broke for that. At the end we kissed. Now just waiting for her to come to my place on Tuesday, for the shag. I'll continue my point below...

I mean my whole conflcit with the DJ fundamentals is that it doesn't get you laid. Its so easy to say Next and if a girl isn't worth it like this one it is probably the best approach. However saying next doesn't get you laid.

Yes and no. That fundamental is a guidline. Its there to make sure you behave like a man and not act needy. A lot of guys easily fall into the trap of becoming needy. However, it is possible to call a lot and not appear needy, although hard. If you are able to do that then technically you are not breaking the overall goal of the fundamental. Saying things like call me, when you get home might be a little needy. stop that. When I call the chick I use qualifiers with disqualifiers (masf jargon hehe), meaning I would display non-neediness. example. in one txt message banter between me and the russian girl I was teasing her that she was going to rob a bank in the city, and that since I was her manager she would have to give me 95% of the proceeds. she texted back that no. all i would get is a kiss. I quickly replied with a Kiss??? no, way! I don't want that. ok, I'll take 75% of proceeds since I'm a good manager. She replied ok.

Above I used a disqualifier, maybe not the best example but it gets the point across. I could care less about her kiss (hehe. well, i do want it, i'm justnot telling her.)

I always like to see what I did wrong so that I can improve for next time.

BTW yesterday I sent her a text message "you need glasses"

lol she responded back saying

"what?"

I never responded. This girl is stupid cause on a looks scale I'm way better than her. She just does the whole make up thing but I saw right through that. What the hell is this girl thinking!

dude, if you just want the shag, go for it. Just don't go out of your way for it. thats beta. Call when you feel, and tell her about YOUR day, just like you'd tell any of your other friends.

If you don't really want the shag screw her. she's just one girl. Move to the next one.

good stuff bro.

cheers

naruto out! :moon:

 

[doctorwhat]

on a scale from one to ten, where are the women you go after, judging by their looks? have you ever considered the 3-4s? they're easy pickins, and even if you may be above average in looks, that's not the only factor...

 

[christz]

chrisz thanks for the support.

Thats a nice line you got going. Where do you usually take them? Do you have sex all the time when they leave with you?

for the few that do leave they're attention who*res SO yes.. but it leads to more of nothing.. however since that approch is so direct and without qaulifications it fails more than it succeds and since its a house party you can't just do it to the next girl and the next its kinda like a 3 strikes thing

 

[Reyaj]

FutureSparatan

You are right. She is obviously not worth my time. Now if she was really hot I might be a little AFC and chase more but again what the hell is this girl thinking!



DJ Naruto

Thanks 4 the support!

"Yes, there was something about you that she liked. Since, you didn't talk to her for a long time, I'm assuming it was your confidence in approaching. "

I think I agree. Another example of how confidence works!


"Whether she is worth it is for you to decide. If you simply want the shag () it doesn't hurt to call her off and on when you are not busy. However, and thats a big HOWEVER, please talk to other girls and get more numbers. This way if she answers or not, meets with you or not, it would not phase you.

I'm telling you this because its what I do. I could care less about the chick thinks or what others think, I call when I want to. However, I don't call only her I have a whole bunch of other numbers that I work on simultaneously."



I agree except that I haven't talked to this girl at all since my last text comment. I don't her interest level in me is high at all after meeting so I doubt I could get the shag buddy thing going. I haven't called her at all and she hasn't called me. I think I got the hint. And even if I didn't I'm not going to lower my pride. I'm going to continue my quest by approaching others!


"I met a girl at the musuem, a russian chick. Hot! gamed her and got her number. First month she never picked up or responded. I'd send ****y funny messages whenever I was doing something cool or when I felt like it. I never told her to call me back. This way, it would seem like I was just amusing myself calling her. Eventually, she picked up and we talked. Turns out the reason she didn't call was because she had a boyfriend. (same thing with my prior gf) Then she started doing what your chick was doing. I just stayed funny. She texted me out of the blue at night one time. Ehem. I knew i had her. we chatted set up date. she showed but i was late so she left pissed. I called her and convinced her to meet for another date. We met. I showed her a jolly good time. No money I'm too broke for that. At the end we kissed. Now just waiting for her to come to my place on Tuesday, for the shag. I'll continue my point below..."


Awseome story dude. Yeah for all I know this girl has boyfriend or ex baggage. Its different because I got to the date and then I backed off. Did you shag the russian broad?

"Yes and no. That fundamental is a guidline. Its there to make sure you behave like a man and not act needy. A lot of guys easily fall into the trap of becoming needy. However, it is possible to call a lot and not appear needy, although hard. If you are able to do that then technically you are not breaking the overall goal of the fundamental. Saying things like call me, when you get home might be a little needy. stop that. When I call the chick I use qualifiers with disqualifiers (masf jargon hehe), meaning I would display non-neediness. example. in one txt message banter between me and the russian girl I was teasing her that she was going to rob a bank in the city, and that since I was her manager she would have to give me 95% of the proceeds. she texted back that no. all i would get is a kiss. I quickly replied with a Kiss??? no, way! I don't want that. ok, I'll take 75% of proceeds since I'm a good manager. She replied ok. "


I agree and more good stuff. It seems like everyone thinks I acted needy here but I kept it cool. I called just enough as needed to get the date. I mean if I didn't call or text her I wouldn't have met up with her. And who knows maybe she just wanted me to try harder and I could have seen her again. I agree with your view on this, thanks!


"dude, if you just want the shag, go for it. Just don't go out of your way for it. thats beta. Call when you feel, and tell her about YOUR day, just like you'd tell any of your other friends.

If you don't really want the shag screw her. she's just one girl. Move to the next one. "


yeah not worth my efforts! Next!



doctorwhat

"on a scale from one to ten, where are the women you go after, judging by their looks? have you ever considered the 3-4s? they're easy pickins, and even if you may be above average in looks, that's not the only factor..."


I go for basically 6 or highers. I need to be able to get hard in order to go for it!

 

[Reyaj]

bump

 

[Charm]

Share more approaches. How many are you at?

 

[Reyaj]

well haven't had a chance to do any more approaches but with the holiday this week I may go out so we'll see what happens.

Thanx 4 the support every1!

 

[Faded Image]

Jayer, I was 23 about to turn 24 when you started this thread and now I'm 25about to turn 26.

You can do it man.

By the way, on the scale of 1 to 10, this post should be considered a 10 and added to the archives.

Out of the thousands upon thousands of discussion i've read here, I can actually say this is a true classic of trials and tribulations most people deal with when they try to get a handle on this part of their life.

 

[Reyaj]

Faded Image thank you very much. That means a lot to me.

I know I am crticized a lot for not keeping a good pace on this but everything I do write is true. Yesterday I was out at a strip club and the bar tender kept smiling at me. I ended up making small talk with her. Like where you from, where else do you work etc....

I was going to go for the digits but then I over heard her tell the bouncer that her boyfriend was coming to pick her up.

I definitely need to get rolling. I promise I'll complete my 100! Hopefully this decade lol

 

[On Point]

It seems like texting has become a bit of a crutch for you. If the women don't want to talk on the phone I'd personally next them.

It seems like maybe you're not establishing enough rapport before getting the number.

Also it still seems like you're struggling with self-confidence. I think you should try to get some inner game going and get busier with a couple things. Take some dance lessons, or whatever interests you.

Just my .02. Best of luck. Keep on keepin' on.

 

[Don Picard]

Hey Jayer. How's everything? I spent about 2 hours last night reading this entire thread. I really enjoyed it and appreciate your honest posts. I am new to this site and have always been the nice guy. Of course, this explains why I am here reading about DJing. I am 31 and have only cold approached maybe 4 girls in my life. By the way, I dont really think waitresses, store employees, strippers... etc count as cold approaches. These peoples' jobs depend on being nice to customers. If you are still in college, then that is where you should be meeting chicks
Jayer, dont give up. Your posts have inspired me to get out there and do something. Reading your posts brought back so many memories of probably why I havent dated for so many years. It's just a big game that I was never good at. I finally get a girl's number, and nothing happens or they want to be friends... I treated girls nice and it never worked! I never got laid being nice to girls. The only girls that appreciate you being nice are the non-attractive or fat ones. Who wants those? Hopefully, this site will help me change. I aim to be able to approach any women that I am interested in. I have made a promise to myself that I will cold approach at least one girl everyday. I plan on doing this mainly at stores. I usually go to work in the morning and come straight home, unless I have to stop at the grocery store. I will have to change my routine to accomplish my goal. I know that approaching 1 girl a day is nothing to a DJ, but it is a definite start for me and a realistic one.

OK Jayer, I'm looking forward to your next approach post.

 

[Reyaj]

Don Picard thank you so much for the support. I think I'd count any approach with the intent to get a girl's number or ask on a date an approach. Speaking of strip clubs, I just wasted money foolishly at one last night. I am going to stop with that and try to stick my approaches to real world women.


Everything you say is true about being nice and those girls that do have interest you usually aren't interested in them. Thats been the story of my life thus far.

Don I am glad I inspired you but I'll be honest, approaching 1 girl everyday is a lot harder than it sounds. Look at how long it's taken me. I'd definitely would like to hear of your experience though so feel free to post your thoughts in this thread.

You have inspired me now Don Picard. My next approach will be dedicated to you. I hope to get out and do 1 this weekend.

Stay tuned my friend...

 

[Reyaj]

I hold my head down as I can't report anything after this weekend. I did go out to a lounge on Friday night but there weren't that many targets. I did see a few girls dancing in groups and I felt intimidated approaching them by myself... especially since they were dancing too. When I finally had the balls or enough liquor they were gone. There were however 2 girls sitting down by themselves. So my friend said he was going to approach 1. So my friend just sat down next to her and started talking. I was standing a little bit away so I couldn't hear what they were saying, but after a few minutes I noticed that the conversation stopped so I knew he had struck out.

So I immediately moved in, I sat on the other side of the girl and said

"hey what did my friend say to you" (smiling)

Her: umm nothing.. I don't know. (turned her head and ignored me) then started talking to her friend

What a bi$(#(

Why are some girls so stuck up? They should all be happy that a guy tries to talk to them, not act like they are superior and that we are annoying wasps.


It certainly isn't an easy game, but I'm still playing!

 

[Reyaj]

Well its obvious I have some social anxiety problem.

I was at the computer store today as I needed to buy new ink for my printer. Well I went up to pay and there was this really cute blonde at the register. Well anyway she asked me how I was doing, and I asked the same. Then I interjected a little c&f. I said out of nowhere "I don't want a discount card" (cause I know they always ask if you want to sign up for 1)

She was like "oh you think you know what I'm going to say huh smiling"

Anyway my anxiety kicked in and I just wanted to leave fast. So I said "they always ask me that here" "have a great day" and I proceeded to walk away.

Then she's like "wait... you forgot your credit card!"

Boy did I feel embarassed.

It was a good opportunity to ask for the phone number though and I blew it.!

 

[On Point]

You can flip everything if you're able to stay calm. I.E. "That was a test, I wanted to see if you'd run out and spend all my money. You passed, so I guess we can hang out."

You seem to put a lot of pressure on yourself, try to stay relaxed and have some fun with it.

You might consider doing something where you'll see woman multiple times (i.e. dance lessons or any kind of class) . It's a little less pressure since you don't have to accomplish everything in one interaction.

Keep your head up man.

Then she's like "wait... you forgot your credit card!"

Boy did I feel embarassed.

It was a good opportunity to ask for the phone number though and I blew it.!