If you're in a social circle, and the women there don't give you a hug when they leave, it's OVER

[MatureDJ]

I'm in a social circle - international folks in an Eastern-European folks (yes, far too much sausage, but it is what it is ). So there was a semi-harridan chick (definitely bangable) that I had talked to earlier, and we talked, with a few others around. Then this little agglomeration of people just kind of moved on to other agglomerations. This chick was talking with some taller, Chaddish men, and when it came time that she was leaving, every one of those guys got a hug, while she seemed to avoid me, so as to not have to give me a hug.

This made me think of my favorite Black-Pill movie scene, where one of the main characters (Raphael) was always talking to a lot of women, but they would not acknowledge his presence, other than when he was the active participant in keeping the conversation going - in this case, when he was fast-dancing with them, but not being worthy of a slow-dance, which precipitated the world's most black-pill scene ever in cinema history (I think everyone knows this scene).

This is a small action that is almost imperceptible, but for those who study black-pill, it's as clear as day.

 

[GoodMan32]

I've mentioned on this forum that I was in a sausage-heavy clique my freshman year of college (6 sausages, 2 clams)

The 2 clams would hug me. Yet they never dated me or gave me sex. One of the clams gave sex to 2 different sausages in our clique (and the other clam, adamant about remaining a virgin until marriage, at least dated 2 of the sausages in our clique)

My point? Hugs don't necessarily mean anything.

 

[MatureDJ]

I've mentioned on this forum that I was in a sausage-heavy clique my freshman year of college (6 sausages, 2 clams)

The 2 clams would hug me. Yet they never dated me or gave me sex. One of the clams gave sex to 2 different sausages in our clique (and the other clam, adamant about remaining a virgin until marriage, at least dated 2 of the sausages in our clique)

My point? Hugs don't necessarily mean anything.

It's better than nothing.

 

[GoodMan32]

It's better than nothing.

Agreed, better than nothing.

 

[Clockwerk50]

How come you were the only person that didn’t get a hug?

 

[MatureDJ]

How come you were the only person that didn’t get a hug?

Because the huggees mogged me by at least 25 cm.

 

[Clockwerk50]

How come you were the only person that didn’t get a hug?

So they didn’t hug you because they were 10 inches taller than you?

 

[corrector]

Have this type of issue too. This has bothered me so badly that I bought a Bolster pillow, this is a long pillow that is body sized so you can go on top of and hug, and when you listen to a nice ASMR video or someone you like, go on top of the Bolster pillow and hug it then it does feel like you are getting a hug. I hug this pillow allot of times. But, I do have rules. I would only do that during the night in bed, but stay away from it during the day time unless I'm triggered by a gesture of affection in public that bothers me. This has not happened in a long time so far.

There are also Cuddling Services if you search from them if you want to pay a pro to hug you up. I have not tried it out, but there are plenty of youtube videos broaching the subject as well.

At the end of the day, you can't control what life throws at you being a sub-5, short, or getting mogged, but you can cope with it how ever you chose to. Since I'm have not been triggered out in a long while, and have interactions, it looks like circumstances (ie around women) have changed enough that having copes are now like eating cough candy without having a cold.

However, I did have an intense hugging session with my mother's caregiver. Nothing recent with her, but it was earlier in the year. Now we are just talking with each other, which is still better than nothing.

 

[corrector]

So they didn’t hug you because they were 10 inches taller than you?

Are you trying to rub it in? What is wrong with you?

 

[corrector]

I've mentioned on this forum that I was in a sausage-heavy clique my freshman year of college (6 sausages, 2 clams)

The 2 clams would hug me. Yet they never dated me or gave me sex. One of the clams gave sex to 2 different sausages in our clique (and the other clam, adamant about remaining a virgin until marriage, at least dated 2 of the sausages in our clique)

My point? Hugs don't necessarily mean anything.

That is an interesting when you put it that way. I always thought if you got hugs it means that there is a high level of interest.

What was the quality of the hug? Was it like a brief "friendship" type of hug, or was it a gropey type of hug where she'd let you fondle her a$$ if you wanted to or keep hugging her up like a doll?

 

[corrector]

I'm in a social circle - international folks in an Eastern-European folks (yes, far too much sausage, but it is what it is ). So there was a semi-harridan chick (definitely bangable) that I had talked to earlier, and we talked, with a few others around. Then this little agglomeration of people just kind of moved on to other agglomerations. This chick was talking with some taller, Chaddish men, and when it came time that she was leaving, every one of those guys got a hug, while she seemed to avoid me, so as to not have to give me a hug.

This made me think of my favorite Black-Pill movie scene, where one of the main characters (Raphael) was always talking to a lot of women, but they would not acknowledge his presence, other than when he was the active participant in keeping the conversation going - in this case, when he was fast-dancing with them, but not being worthy of a slow-dance, which precipitated the world's most black-pill scene ever in cinema history (I think everyone knows this scene).

This is a small action that is almost imperceptible, but for those who study black-pill, it's as clear as day.

What was the quality of the hug? Was it like a brief type of hug, or was it like a more "deeper" type of hug? I'm assuming it was a deep hug, where she's throwing her body to the guys and it's like a semi-fondling/hug thing? Is that what got you triggered?

 

[Clockwerk50]

Are you trying to rub it in? What is wrong with you?

What do you mean? What is so offensive about it? It sounds like he is trying to BS me that the women were 10 inches taller than him.

 

[corrector]

What do you mean? What is so offensive about it? It sounds like he is trying to BS me that the women were 10 inches taller than him.

I did not say it was offensive. The point is, the lady didn't like him compared to the other guys. Generally when you experience that then you feel bad. Then when you go home your mind plays tricks, blows things out of proprotion, makes you feel like you are sub-human that's unworthy of love and you are just invisible to women, etc.... and you go into a negative spiral. With me it doesn't matter why beyond the fact that it happened to him. It sucks when you experience something like that. It makes the experience within the group toxic as well.

 

[Mike32ct]

What was the quality of the hug? Was it like a brief type of hug, or was it like a more "deeper" type of hug? I'm assuming it was a deep hug, where she's throwing her body to the guys and it's like a semi-fondling/hug thing? Is that what got you triggered?

Good point. There are generally two types of hugs.

If she’s attracted to the guy or at least considers him dateable/on her level, it will be a firm hug with both bodies squared up with each other (ie full boob contact against the guy’s chest). And her hands will typically be firmly on his back.

Then there’s the friendzone sort of hug (or alternatively no hug at all). With the FZ hug, the two bodies are not squared up with each other. She’s either on an angle or leaning back so as to minimize the incidental contact of her boobs against a guy she is not attracted to. And her hands might give him more of a pat on the back than holding his back. And it won’t be a firm hug but a weaker one.

TLDR: The type of hug is largely dependent on the level of boob contact.

 

[Clockwerk50]

I did not say it was offensive. The point is, the lady didn't like him compared to the other guys. Generally when you experience that then you feel bad. Then when you go home your mind plays tricks, blows things out of proprotion, makes you feel like you are sub-human that's unworthy of love and you are just invisible to women, etc.... and you go into a negative spiral. With me it doesn't matter why beyond the fact that it happened to him. It sucks when you experience something like that. It makes the experience within the group toxic as well.

Yes, but why did it happen? Was it his intense thirst for connection that made them not want to hug him, or do they just not know him well enough? What if the next interaction leads to a hug? Is he doing anything to improve his chances compared to the competition? Are these girls really a foot taller than him?

There’s no point in dwelling on the negatives. This won’t be his last opportunity to interact with women, and if these girls are part of his social circle, they’ll likely have more chances to connect in the future.

How to Not Dwell on Past Failures and Instead Focus on Successes? | SoSuave Discussion Forum

Good point. There are generally two types of hugs.

If she’s attracted to the guy or at least considers him dateable/on her level, it will be a firm hug with both bodies squared up with each other (ie full boob contact against the guy’s chest). And her hands will typically be firmly on his back.

Then there’s the friendzone sort of hug (or alternatively no hug at all). With the FZ hug, the two bodies are not squared up with each other. She’s either on an angle or leaning back so as to minimize the incidental contact of her boobs against a guy she is not attracted to. And her hands might give him more of a pat on the back than holding his back. And it won’t be a firm hug but a weaker one.

TLDR: The type of hug is largely dependent on the level of boob contact.

I’ve experienced both types of hugs in the past. I’ve had ONS with women who didn’t know I existed until I encountered them at a mall or club - right place, right time, and I managed to push the right buttons. On the other hand, I’ve also received warm, deep hugs from women who would then mention their boyfriends by name shortly after. I’ve also didn’t slept with some women who didn’t hug me, while I’ve slept with women who gave me deep hugs.

In my view, hugs don’t carry much significance until your penis is in her vagina, or the minimum is if you are at least making out with her.

 

[GoodMan32]

Have this type of issue too. This has bothered me so badly that I bought a Bolster pillow, this is a long pillow that is body sized so you can go on top of and hug, and when you listen to a nice ASMR video or someone you like, go on top of the Bolster pillow and hug it then it does feel like you are getting a hug. I hug this pillow allot of times. But, I do have rules. I would only do that during the night in bed, but stay away from it during the day time unless I'm triggered by a gesture of affection in public that bothers me. This has not happened in a long time so far.

There are also Cuddling Services if you search from them if you want to pay a pro to hug you up. I have not tried it out, but there are plenty of youtube videos broaching the subject as well.

At the end of the day, you can't control what life throws at you being a sub-5, short, or getting mogged, but you can cope with it how ever you chose to. Since I'm have not been triggered out in a long while, and have interactions, it looks like circumstances (ie around women) have changed enough that having copes are now like eating cough candy without having a cold.

However, I did have an intense hugging session with my mother's caregiver. Nothing recent with her, but it was earlier in the year. Now we are just talking with each other, which is still better than nothing.

Do you think you have potential for more with the caregiver?

 

[GoodMan32]

That is an interesting when you put it that way. I always thought if you got hugs it means that there is a high level of interest.

What was the quality of the hug? Was it like a brief "friendship" type of hug, or was it a gropey type of hug where she'd let you fondle her a$$ if you wanted to or keep hugging her up like a doll?

Interesting. I'm under the impression that all it means when they hug you is that they're friendly with you (and that you at least aren't repulsive enough that they're turned off even by the thought of hugging)

I could be wrong. Maybe these 2 female friends from 15 years ago were attracted to me (but ended up with other guys because I never made a move)

To answer your question, the quality of the hugs was friendly. I never tried groping their booty (as much as I would have wanted to )

 

[GoodMan32]

Good point. There are generally two types of hugs.

If she’s attracted to the guy or at least considers him dateable/on her level, it will be a firm hug with both bodies squared up with each other (ie full boob contact against the guy’s chest). And her hands will typically be firmly on his back.

Then there’s the friendzone sort of hug (or alternatively no hug at all). With the FZ hug, the two bodies are not squared up with each other. She’s either on an angle or leaning back so as to minimize the incidental contact of her boobs against a guy she is not attracted to. And her hands might give him more of a pat on the back than holding his back. And it won’t be a firm hug but a weaker one.

TLDR: The type of hug is largely dependent on the level of boob contact.

As I mentioned on my last post (in response to the question @corrector asked me), the 2 female friends from college would give me friend zone hugs.

On this post, I'm going to address your comment about firm hugs. There have been broads in post-college years that have given me firmer hugs (one of which I ended up bedding...she's the last woman I bedded for free)

 

[Mike32ct]

As I mentioned on my last post (in response to the question @corrector asked me), the 2 female friends from college would give me friend zone hugs.

On this post, I'm going to address your comment about firm hugs. There have been broads in post-college years that have given me firmer hugs (one of which I ended up bedding...she's the last woman I bedded for free)

Yeah that’s exactly what I’m getting at.

My female friend either doesn’t hug me at all, or it’s an angled pat on the back one (FZ hug).

Back when I took dance classes, there was one lady who would give me very firm hugs as a greeting and practically jammed her boobs into me. It was such a strong IOI but it went over my head at the time lol.

The dance teacher (understandably) would greet me with the FZ hug.

 

[corrector]

Do you think you have potential for more with the caregiver?

No, she is married, and this is all being done in the same room where both my mother and father are present and they don't want us doing those things with each other. Also when we last hugged each other, they did a site inspection in the house and that ruffled some feathers with us here. One time later I did offer her a hug when she complained she was groped by another caregiving client and felt violated and didn't want to see him again.. For the moment, we are chit-chatting, and my folks are happy for me that we are talking to each other and it's normally upbeat. It's enough to register for the 2 day reset (ie I allow myself to watch ASMR videos and certain music videos if 2 days have passed without a decent interaction with a woman). I'm currently having high quality interactions with two different women and possibly a third one that comes off and on. However, I'm just focused on the 2 day rule for those interactions, it's more of a regulatory thing in terms fo the ASMR videos..it's like I don't want to watch them unless I feel I need to and established that rule to establish a strong enough need.

Like I said, my life, like yours, but probably worst comparitivly in terms of circumstances, does not lend itself to meeting or attracting SINGLE and AVAILABLE women anywhere. Interactions help as its better than nothing and things can bud and develop from interactions....I'll keep a note of that when that is happening.