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SamTheHobit

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Jeeeeeez you guys are over analysing this whole situation. The dude just needed a break from this forum, as I'm sure everyone takes ones in a while.
I doubt he thinks his better or even cares that his better than anyone else. He's probably just frustrated for some reason, and posted that.

When I take breaks from this forum I sometimes post stupid shiit for some reason than come back in a month or two.

This whole issue seems to be blown out of proportion just because he has tons of green dots.
- my two cents.
 

SoSuave666

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It's very clear that BB thinks he's better than everyone else on this site. He noted that pretty much everyone on here is beneath him. In reality, it seems as though his business isn't quite as lucrative as he made it out to seem. In his defense, there will always be sour grapes looking for ways to tarnish your legacy. BB seems to be a man that takes care of himself and holds himself in high esteem...even to the point of maybe feigning some of his accomplishments. People with big egos will usually go to extreme measures to protect their reputation. Of course no one on here really know anything about BB's personal life, but I'd be willing to be it's not quite as nice as he portrays it. And you know what? That's OK. I'm cool with someone who wants to come on here and boost their own ego by talking a big game. But when you belittle people on here who are honest and for the most part decent, it's just poor form.

To his original post, which I have yet to comment on, I say this: it's indecent for someone to cheat on another human being. It's something that gets condoned on here a lot and I think without merit. The golden rule has been dubbed as such because it is so truthful. Are people really OK with someone you genuinely care about cheating on you because you don't make enough money? What about the umpteen other characteristics that comprise your being? I understand that women are hypergamous and all that; but there has to be a cut off. a 29 year old supervisor at a restaurant isn't a fvcking bad gig. Who is to say he's not next in line for management? Does he have a plan to get to ownership? Is he saving his money for his own ambitions? Who knows.

Basically what BB is saying is that no one is EVER content with their gf/bf. There is always someone better out there that a.) makes more money b.) is more attractive and c.) fvcks better. I can agree with that to an extent. There is also the element of individualism that he's not taking into account. No two people are fundamentally the same. Sure the next person may earn a higher wage, but there is no guarantee they look better, fvck better, or have a deeper connection. So is money the only value here that women hold in a higher regard than all others? Is every chick going to dump a dude in his late twenties for not being a billionaire?

There has to be some sort of semblance of hope....something to salvage. Good women are out there who will not cheat, who will stand by you through some tough times, and will politely decline advances from other wealthier men because they have met a real dude. It's very low character to cheat on someone, and even lower character to cheat on someone because of money. I'm not saying be complacent...but more or less have a plan. Know where you want to be and the sacrifices that will help you reach that goal. I refuse to sit here and believe that all women are willing to trade up because some guy is better than me at one specific thing. As a matter of fact, I know it's not true. I have plates that were begging to date me and be exclusive knowing that I wasn't in the most profitable of situations. The woman from BB's story is simply low class, and there is NO defending her.
 

Lexington

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iqqi said:
Being a restaurant supervisor isn't really a middle class job.
Yes it is. According to the census bureau, the median HOUSEHOLD income for 2011 was $51,914. Per capita money income in past 12 months (2010 dollars) 2006-2010 was $27,334. I'd bet that in his job he easily makes close to that or more.

It isn't being the General Manager of the store.
Yeah and being a vice-president isn't being CEO. Everyone has someone who is in a better position or makes more money.

After years on that job... why in the world is he not the actual GM of a restaurant? It is most likely because he does not want the responsibility and he lacks the ambition.
Or it could be because there was another more senior person with more experience who was holding down that job. In these times of high unemployment, there is a lot of competition for even the jobs that you look down upon.

Screw competing for high income jobs. Make your own path, start a business.
That's easier said than done. Yeah everyone says start a business but it's funny how they neglect to mention how many businesses actually succeed. By the looks of things, even BB's business isn't doing so great.

You aren't capable of that? Then try to get the best job you can get, and hopefully it isn't some floor manager at a restaurant, or a receptionist.
I'm sorry but who are you to be looking down your nose at people who earn an honest, respectable living?

If that is all you are capable of, then that is all you are capable of.
Maybe that job is good enough for that guy. Apparently it wasn't good enough for the girl. It's funny how she waited until AFTER she cheated on him with a more successful guy before leaving him, isn't it?

I don't see how any man here should aspire to those limitations and that kind of outlook however.
Dare I say that I didn't achieve all that I could have achieved? I'm going to be an anesthesiologist....pretty good profession in my book. But if I busted my a** harder maybe I could have been a neurosurgeon or a spinal surgeon. Most people draw the line somewhere.

If he's satisfied with his job and his life, then who are we or anyone else to judge this person? It seems that he is a decent, law abiding, tax paying citizen. He isn't the model of success but he's not exactly a miserable failure either.

As for what she did, well how much does she really even matter in the big picture here.
In the big picture (whatever that means), it doesn't matter at all. But I just want to make sure that we are being very clear in that the girl is a branch swinger. This is textbook branch swinging.

Whether he had her or not, whether she left or not, the guy has settled for a mundane career. Is that something people here think of as a worthy goal?
What's worthy to you might not be worthy to me. Everyone has their own standards to live by. You make it sound like this person is terrible for not being super ambitious.

I consider myself a very ambitious person. I like that I am ambitious. I think ambition can be a very good thing. But I can also understand if other people have different goals in life from me.

One of my best friends from college is an 8th grade history teacher. Could he have done a lot better from a financial perspective? Certainly. It was within his capabilities to become an engineer or a doctor or a layer. But he's satisfied with his career.

Or should everyone here just be thanking fate or god that they can get whatever job they can get and just stay there as long as possible without trying to do better?
The problem that you have here is that you assume that he wants to do better. First of all, what is better? To most people it means more money, but not everyone is so money-minded.

I mean.... we are talking about YOUNG, CAPABLE, INTELLIGENT, GOOD men here, are we not?
Have you achieved everything that you ever wanted to achieve. Have you reached your maximum potential? I'll bet that you didn't. Neither did I. If I *really* wanted to, I could have gotten a 4.0 GPA all through college. But I didn't. Why? Because sometimes I preferred to go out and have a few beers with my friends instead of staying in and studying.

Just because we are capable of doing something doesn't mean that we have to do it. We should only do it if we want to do it. That guy was satisfied with his career. She wasn't. But if she wasn't so happy with his lack of ambition, she could have at least done him the courtesy of leaving him before cheating on him.

But hey, maybe this new more successful guy with the Beamer will come across some hot piece of a** that wants to jump his bone. Then he will be perfectly justified in kicking the first broad to the curb. After all, he'd just doing what he's capable of doing.
 

Die Hard

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Thread of the year!! :up:

BB sure seemed to be full of himself, his posts often seemed to have the underlying motive of qualifying himself to the rest of the forum. God knows how many times I've been tempted to confront him on that... But I never really did!

Why? Coz what the fvck does it matter? His posts either hold truth or not. His posts either teach me something or not. His posts are either useful to me or not. What the fvck do I care about his underlying motives for writing a post? What the fvck do I care whether he is of high character or not? I have better things to do than passing judgment on some dude behind a computer on the other side of the world. Why the fvck would I be interested in that?

So this whole thread has become a joke indeed. Who cares if you guys have discredited Backbreaker in certain ways? Backbreaker could either be Jesus Christ or the devil himself, it doesn't matter one bit to me. And neither should it to any of you. All that should matter is whether or not his posts are logically sound and teach you something. Focus on the content of his posts, not on himself.

As for that content... I'm amazed at the amount of AFC incompetence displayed in this thread!! This thread almost seems like the embodiment of a certain disease that has and always will be prevalent on SoSuave. I call it the sickness of Whine... People who have this disease will just whine about all the injustice that women do to men and expect that their whining will change anything.

"Oh noes! The woman cheated on him and left him! She treated him unfairly, he did not deserve that! Let's all whine about it!"

Okay, I'll join you and whine along: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Now let's see what all our whining did about the injustice...... Oh, that's dissapointing and surprising! It did....it did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Morons....
 

Findog

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Die Hard,

I absolutely agree with you that it does not do any good to whine and endlessly wallow in self-pity when you are on the receiving end of something you consider unfair.

What I will say is that in the immediate aftermath of someone cheating on you and leaving you for somebody else, you're perfectly entitled to feel like sh*t for a while and throw a bit of a pity party, but at a certain point, you have to dust yourself off and get on with your life. There's a statute of limitations for that sort of thing.

I didn't really see any 'whining' in this thread about an injustice, just forcefully pushing back at those that were defending cheating and branchswinging as morally defensible, or using this particular example as apt for demonstrating the idea that you can't get complacent in your relationships.
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Findog

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Here's something else that I think the OP and others agreeing with him don't seem to get: unless you're Mark Zuckerberg, the Sultan of Brunei, or Warren Buffett, there is ALWAYS a bigger, better deal in terms of money and material possessions. You can be busting your @ss trying to get ahead, but when it comes to the rat race, there is ALWAYS gonna be somebody ahead of you, somebody with a nicer car and more square feet in their house or their clothes come from a better tailor. Are you really arguing that it's perfectly fine to discard the BMW you've been driving the second a Maybach seems within reach? If the BMW has always reliably gotten you where you need to go and never required major service repair?

Yes, hypergamy is something that is ingrained in women, it is part of the terrain, but at a certain point, enough is enough. It is one thing if your boyfriend is a Subway sandwich artist that never went to college and is content to spend all his free time getting high and playing video games and you are getting attention from men that are way more professionally accomplished and have a plan and direction and purpose in their life. Even then you should formally terminate your relationship before seeking out new partners.

I just never saw anything in the description of the restaurant guy that indicated he was a loser or that he had completely fallen asleep at the wheel in his relationship. Maybe that is indeed the case, but the OP never provided those additional details. So to clown on him as a loser when the OP doesn't completely have his own house in order is a bit offensive. I think it's AFC to tear down your fellow decent guy to suck up and defend a cheating branch-swinger.

Yes, hypergamy happens, whether you completely dropped the ball or not, and there has to be a cap on wallowing in self-pity when it happens to you, and the proper response is to get on with your life and find another woman, but that doesn't mean I have to intellectually respect a cheater or clap and applaud when somebody defends her.
 

Married Buried

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iqqi said:
Well, if that's all he is capable of then yeah I can see why she left. Being a restaurant supervisor isn't really a middle class job. It isn't being the General Manager of the store. Those guys usually do not even make what the waiters make. It's kind of like... being a receptionist to the GM. It's great he has a job... but if he settled there for that job forever, then he has absolutely no ambition. After years on that job... why in the world is he not the actual GM of a restaurant? It is most likely because he does not want the responsibility and he lacks the ambition.

Screw competing for high income jobs. Make your own path, start a business. You aren't capable of that? Then try to get the best job you can get, and hopefully it isn't some floor manager at a restaurant, or a receptionist.

If that is all you are capable of, then that is all you are capable of.

I don't see how any man here should aspire to those limitations and that kind of outlook however.

As for what she did, well how much does she really even matter in the big picture here. Whether he had her or not, whether she left or not, the guy has settled for a mundane career. Is that something people here think of as a worthy goal?

Or should everyone here just be thanking fate or god that they can get whatever job they can get and just stay there as long as possible without trying to do better? I mean.... we are talking about YOUNG, CAPABLE, INTELLIGENT, GOOD men here, are we not?

this is why you marry a foreign woman. I did and am very happy.
 

cordoncordon

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iqqi[B said:
]Well, if that's all he is capable of then yeah I can see why she left. Being a restaurant supervisor isn't really a middle class job. [/B]
That is really a pathetic thing for you to say Iqqi, even for you. Since when did you become Miss High Society? Last I heard before this thread you were living out of a van begging for money and a job.


Wow did you forget who you are and where you came from.
 

Married Buried

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cordoncordon said:
That is really a pathetic thing for you to say Iqqi, even for you. Since when did you become Miss High Society? Last I heard before this thread you were living out of a van begging for money and a job.


Wow did you forget who you are and where you came from.

I have a good job and I own a house. Not good enough for iqqi. How much property do you own iqqi?

I still have a hot wife that worships me (i can post pics to prove it), sucks me off vigorously every night, has a hot meal waiting every day.

Do you want that or an iqqi type of woman?
 

MasterFuu

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I lived in three countries and have been a war refugee half of my life with nothing in my pocket beside hope and support of my family. One thing I can tell you that I have experienced in my 31 years of life is that life is about up's and down's. Today you can be on top of the mountain tomorrow you can be in the bottom of the sea. That's life it it's most honest form. That's why money while important to some degree should never be top priority. Work on your inner self that will be there till end of your time. The material stuff will fade away.

And the guy that said that honesty, integrity and humbleness doesn't get you girl is just wrong :D . It get's you the good kind :)
Of course this forum teaches the bad boy tactics. Bad boys get bad girls. I know of that.:rock:
 

iqqi

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cordoncordon said:
That is really a pathetic thing for you to say Iqqi, even for you. Since when did you become Miss High Society? Last I heard before this thread you were living out of a van begging for money and a job.


Wow did you forget who you are and where you came from.
Hmmm, I don't recall ever begging for anything, but here you go, still embellishing. I get the impression that you are trying to be outrageous because you want my attention.

Anyhoo... back to the discussion at hand.

I am the last person to give a sh!t about how much someone makes. Seriously, I believe in the ultimate theory of "you can't take it with you". But when you are failing to provide yourself with any kind of luxury or small comforts in life, you are failing in life. Especially when you have the ability to do so, but you are just lazy.

According to BB, this guy has been stagnating for a long time in a not so hot career when he is capable of more. Him and his girlfriend can't go on trips, or do half the things anyone else is doing because of lack of money. As BB said, "that sh!t was getting old". As for people who keep talking about how respectable a career it is... I never said it wasn't. But it's definitely not some single 20 something man's best bet. Do you even know what a restaurant supervisor does? It's not much. That's probably why the guy likes it. And that's cool he likes it, great. But to spend years and years in such a menial position is not ambitious in any sense of the word. And it's hardly a stimulating or emotionally/morally/worldly rewarding career either.

This is a man we are talking about. A man in his late 20's. Without children, a wife, or anything holding him down. Who is capable of pretty much anything he wants to do.

I hardly doubt that is the best he could do. There is a serious issue in this country of people just being lazy as hell, mad that they don't got money to do stuff, but not doing anything about it. In this guy's case, there are literally a million other restaurants he could apply for the GM position, or hell he should just be a frigging waiter because they make more that supervisors in any decent fine dining restaurant, if his dream passions lay within the food industry. But instead he apparently got comfortable in a barely get by situation, which is the doom for a lot of men when it comes to women and life in general.

You could keep whining about the girl not having any morals by jumping ship, but she thought he could do better but would not, so she could do better, and lost attraction for this guy. I seriously don't understand how anyone here can applaud this guy for being happy with being a supervisor for that many years somewhere, with no desire to go the next step in all that time. How do you plan a future with someone when they aren't concerned at all about finances?

He isn't a teacher who is passionate about kids, he isn't a firefighter saving lives. A restaurant supervisor isn't changing the world, and it sure isn't putting much bread on the table. I'm just saying it is super easy in the restaurant industry to decide to move up the career ladder, and this guy apparently is just coasting. I doubt he is a drop out or an ex con who is just happy to have a job.

I mean, he has a job, great! He has clothes too, great! He woke up today, great! If that is all he is trying to do in life, he will be better off with a girl who is just as unmotivated as he is to do anything in life that might require some kind of money.

I am looking at this situation completely objectively, is anyone who is arguing against these points doing the same?

Here is another way of saying my same point. If you aren't comfortable in life, or if you want more in life, then you should do something about it. Being idle is a great way for life and opportunity to pass you by. I never said it's a good thing to trade up whenever you can. But if even the smallest desires are not being fulfilled due to lack of motivation, then that's a problem. No?
 

betheman

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iqqi said:
Hmmm,
He isn't a teacher who is passionate about kids, he isn't a firefighter saving lives. A restaurant supervisor isn't changing the world, and it sure isn't putting much bread on the table. I'm just saying it is super easy in the restaurant industry to decide to move up the career ladder, and this guy apparently is just coasting. I doubt he is a drop out or an ex con who is just happy to have a job.

I mean, he has a job, great! He has clothes too, great! He woke up today, great! If that is all he is trying to do in life, he will be better off with a girl who is just as unmotivated as he is to do anything in life that might require some kind of money.

I am looking at this situation completely objectively,(No you arent) is anyone who is arguing against these points doing the same?

Now this guy wasnt married to the woman, does your objective view take into account marriage vows?, you know, the standing before god this or whoever, in public, stating you wil stick by the person, through sickness as in health, better or worse, richer or poorer until death? basically whatever the f ccuk life throws at you?
p.s. are you BB's mother?
 

Bible_Belt

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Any woman who judges me based upon how much money I make is a fvckin wh0re. Now, I like wh0res, they are fun. But I still know what a wh0re is.

I have been 'money out the wazoo' rich (relatively at least), and I have also been, for most of my life, and currently, sh!tfaced broke. The funny thing is, I am exactly the same person. The only people I care about think the same of me regardless of how much money I have. That includes the women in my life. That's the challenge of wealth. Who cares about you and not just your money? It's not easy to figure out.
 

hithard

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Die Hard said:
Thread of the year!! :up:

BB sure seemed to be full of himself, his posts often seemed to have the underlying motive of qualifying himself to the rest of the forum. God knows how many times I've been tempted to confront him on that... But I never really did!

Why? Coz what the fvck does it matter? His posts either hold truth or not. His posts either teach me something or not. His posts are either useful to me or not. What the fvck do I care about his underlying motives for writing a post? What the fvck do I care whether he is of high character or not? I have better things to do than passing judgment on some dude behind a computer on the other side of the world. Why the fvck would I be interested in that?

So this whole thread has become a joke indeed. Who cares if you guys have discredited Backbreaker in certain ways? Backbreaker could either be Jesus Christ or the devil himself, it doesn't matter one bit to me. And neither should it to any of you. All that should matter is whether or not his posts are logically sound and teach you something. Focus on the content of his posts, not on himself.

As for that content... I'm amazed at the amount of AFC incompetence displayed in this thread!! This thread almost seems like the embodiment of a certain disease that has and always will be prevalent on SoSuave. I call it the sickness of Whine... People who have this disease will just whine about all the injustice that women do to men and expect that their whining will change anything.

"Oh noes! The woman cheated on him and left him! She treated him unfairly, he did not deserve that! Let's all whine about it!"

Okay, I'll join you and whine along: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Now let's see what all our whining did about the injustice...... Oh, that's dissapointing and surprising! It did....it did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Morons....
I'm glad others saw it this way as well. Your post sums it up
 

Gro0ver

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I think that BB has made the mistake of thinking that he is a master and no longer a student. The truth is, we're all students of life, and it's important to realise this because we and the world around us are constantly changing, so we must be constantly learning, absorbing and adapting to get the best out of life.

Someone doesn't agree with you? Ok, can you learn something from that? Even if people seem just darn right ignorant, there must be something to be gained from it. Getting frustrated and upset is not the way forward. That's the result of arrogance being challenged. The difference between confidence and arrogance is that arrogance is impossible to maintain. It's a deadly trap to fall in to...I can feel myself falling into it lately.

I fear that with all the praise BB receives in here for his interesting and insightful posts, confidence has spilled over into arrogance. It happens to all of us and will continue to happen, such is human nature. We must try to keep the ego in check lest it rule our actions and thoughts.

When you are feeling confident, harness it and enjoy it. But realise you are only a student, like everyone else.
 

iqqi

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betheman said:
Now this guy wasnt married to the woman, does your objective view take into account marriage vows?, you know, the standing before god this or whoever, in public, stating you wil stick by the person, through sickness as in health, better or worse, richer or poorer until death? basically whatever the f ccuk life throws at you?
p.s. are you BB's mother?
Is this a real question, am I supposed to take you seriously?

I'll ignore the stupid last question.

Obviously marriage is more serious. Even then, if a man was a husband or a father to children, and was a restaurant supervisor who could afford to give his family a better lifestyle simply by striving to be a GM or something higher on the totem pole that was completely attainable, and that presented issues on the quality of life, then yes I could see wifey getting sick of it and wanting to do better for herself and her family after a long period of time of waiting, to no avail.

Some people are happy with the very simple things in life and with never going anywhere outside of their hometowns save once every five years, and with their kids wardrobes consisting of hand me downs and not enough money for band camp or gymnastics, and never going out to eat. Some people get stuck in that life, and make the best of it and are happy for it.

And my point isn't even about money, which everyone is hung up on.

It's about quality of life, living life to the fullest that you can. I mentioned teachers and firemen, who usually don't make much. However, that is what their goal in life was to be, and they went out and attained that position. They are probably ok with the sacrifice of a lower wage than say a doctor.

But if you are a line cook in a restaurant, why not strive to be a chef? If you are flipping burgers at BK, why not strive to be the GM of the store? I mean be real here. Some jobs are just jobs. Changing tires at an auto store, a cashier at the grocery store, a supervisor at a store or restaurant, things like that are not going to be very fulfilling. They aren't going to pay much, and are usually temporary while you pursue something bigger.

For some people, yeah that is the best they can do and that is indeed respectable. You gotta do what you gotta do, and sometimes you can't do a whole lot with the hand you were dealt.

But if you have the opportunity and are able bodied and minded, what is the issue with striving for the best that you can do/be?

The simple point I am trying to make and reiterate over and over again, is what is wrong with a woman who loses interest in a man with no ambition or motivation. This was no quick year engagement. It was four years of her watching him going nowhere, and apparently not even attempting to. And do you really expect otherwise?

You've got a guy working 40 hour weeks making schedules for cooks and waiters and sitting in the office reading Yahoo news and occasionally coming out to ask diners how everything is. He is making 30G's a year. Benefits most likely suck. But maybe he got a little lucky there. He goes home, drinks a beer, watches tv with his girl by his side. Every night. Four years go by. On the weekends, he grimaces and chokes up at a $50 brunch bill. Vacations are out of the question unless it is on someone else's dime, he is barely affording rent, bills, and day to day expenses. He possibly has room mates to help foot the expenses. Going to the movies is a big and rare deal because seriously that sh!t is expensive these days. There will be no $100 live theater tickets that's for sure. If kids come into the equation, then welcome to the poorhouse.

I'm sorry... but that really sucks. That's nothing to strive for as a capable man in your late 20's. I don't care who you are.

If you are getting fulfillment from your career and making the world a better place, that is another thing. That is a worthy sacrifice that is enriching.
 

disgustipated

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Holy fuvk this just confirms I'm on the right forum with "women@ like this around. Amazing that people actually think like this about people with perfectly good jobs and not a crapload of other info. Some enlightening viewpoints to say the least.
 

Die Hard

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Findog said:
I didn't really see any 'whining' in this thread about an injustice, just forcefully pushing back at those that were defending cheating and branchswinging as morally defensible, or using this particular example as apt for demonstrating the idea that you can't get complacent in your relationships.
My interpretation of whining in this case: pointing out how a certain action is morally wrong, while absolutely nothing will change by pointing this out.

It's ridiculous to discuss, judge or get upset about the lack of morality in someone's behavior when you really shoiuldn't even EXPECT morality from this person's behavior.

That's the step many guys on here have yet to make: Guys should never expect women to act on morals. No more than you would expect an animal to act on morals... If you enter a cage with a lion unprotected and it tears your leg off, will you really get upset and start discussing the lack of morals on which the lion acted? Of course not, coz you don't expect it to act on morals in the first place. Neither should you expect women to do so... But most guys can't deal with this thought, they WANT to believe that the world is good. They WANT to believe that people in general, and women in specific, will treat you good if you treat them good. The very fact that I just basically placed women on the same level as animals with regards to moral behavior, is too much to handle for most guys.

I wonder how many of you here really do your homework. These kind of discussions have been done before, and better. People should read up on threads like "All women are devilish wh0res" (started by STR8UP). If all of you had read such threads and accepted the truth that's revealed in it, this current thread wouldn't even have more than one page.

But I guess the truly enlightened people on SoSuave (or the world in general) will always be in the minority....
 

Upside

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Iqqi, I don't really know you. I never really had any problems with what you have posted in the past. However, you are so full of ****.

Quoting you

instead of some stagnant pool of nothingness most relationships drown in. so forget the does he make enough to support my french nail manicure habit trait. i want to know if he can pick up and go at a moments notice! can he take a week off or a weekend, to just go out into the world?
i want a companion, an equal, to accompany me on this path. not a provider.
How do you own yourself? Easy. You just accept who you are. You have flaws as well as good points, and once you take responsibility for them you may find that they are not flaws at all.
Once you own yourself, no one else can. They can’t tell you how to be, how to feel, how to act. They can’t tell you who you are.
My problem? By all accounts, this is a gentleman that enjoyed his occupation, where he was at, and the companion that he had. He knew who and what he was and accepted it.

Then there are women. A woman who claims that she wants to be in his life not for what resources he can provide, but who wants a man that can be a companion in the strange journey of life. A woman who claims that she will love him through and through regardless if they spend a weekend at the local beach or the one in Spain. Money is no object! She just wanted to experience life with him. And I quote "i want a companion, an equal, to accompany me on this path. not a provider"

BUT WAIT!!!!!!! Now he is being told BY YOU what he SHOULD be doing, what he SHOULD be aspiring to as long as he is capable of doing in order to maintain the affections of a female who claimed to him that she didn't care what he makes. You are telling us that we should change in order to increase our value in the eyes of society and to prevent branch swinging from happening.

Yet, you are quoted as saying not to give 2 ****s about what people think of you. You tell us that no one can tell you how to act, how to be, and that perceived flaws ("bad" restaurant gig) may not actually be flaws at all! Maybe the dude likes what he is doing and it is very valuable to his life!

You are so full of ****. And by no means is my intention to be insulting in nature, but rather you have absolutely no business telling people how to live their lives WHEN YOU SAY ONE THING AND THEN SAY ANOTHER THAT IS CLEARLY A CONTRACTING STATEMENT.

And you actually have the audacity to put the blame on HIM???? HE had to be BETTER, HE had to have AMBITION, HE had to have the DRIVE.

SHE wasn't a SLUT. SHE wasn't DECEIVING. SHE wasn't to BLAME.

And yet you tell us he doesn't have to listen to any of it because "flaws" can actually be attractive qualities and that you need to be "free" and "own yourself" because in doing so is attractive and will get the womenz.

But in this thread you tell us he had to be better and his flaws weren't attractive. He had to live up to some certain standard of living law in order to keep his woman haaapppppyyyyy and entertained and fulfilled.

This bro caught an absolute break. I hope he lives his life the way he wants to. I hope that he enjoys whatever in the hell he does and finds a women that will appreciate who is as opposed to what.

But Iqqi give me a break. Be freaking consistent. Either flaws can be attractive or flaws are only a hindrance and you must always improve yourself or you stand to lose out in the game of life. Either you need to be your own person and be free, or you need to take the advice of others and change yourself in order to be a "better" person in society.
 

zekko

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This woman is a receptionist. If she craves such a better life, why isn't she out starting a business or trying to better herself or turning herself into a CEO or whatever else is good enough? No, she expects a man to provide that lifestyle for her.

Now that's a man's traditional role, so there's nothing wrong with that on the face of it. But since women want to be treated as equals, shouldn't they hold themselves to the same standard they hold their men to? They want every advantage of being equal plus every advantage of tradition and chivalry, with none of the responsibility.

Of course, once the guy does get a better career and starts making a little more money, then PUAs will start calling him a beta provider type.

MasterFuu said:
And the guy that said that honesty, integrity and humbleness doesn't get you girl is just wrong :D . It get's you the good kind :)
Of course this forum teaches the bad boy tactics. Bad boys get bad girls. I know of that.:rock:
Good answer.

Just to be clear, I was giving what I perceive to be the prevailing beliefs expressed on this forum. I never said I agreed with them.
Humility especially is something that is not valued here. Most advise you to portray yourself as narcissistic, selfish, and self centered. This is supposed to be attractive to women.

However, I do agree with the forum that things like honesty and integrity are not attraction factors. They come into play during the qualifying rounds (with quality women, as you say). But you have to pass their attraction tests first.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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