Originally posted by Wyldfire
There is no such thing as a "nice jerk". A nice person is just nice becuase they treat others with respect, courtesy, empathy and understanding. They ALSO treat themselves as well as they treat others.
A jerk can't be "nice" because he/she is a jerk.
Jerks end up alone in the end once they lose their looks. How often do you see attractive women with unattractive jerks? I don't ever see that. Know why? Because without the looks they are simply not appealing or attractive at all.
An nice person (as I have described) whose looks fade won't be alone in the end because he/she is actually pleasant and enjoyable to be around.
A guy doesn't have to be a jerk to attract women. They can be as nice as they want to be as long as they respect themselves and aren't needy and clingy and never do anything that you attach expectations to. If you don't want to be friends with someone but want to date them...then ask them out on a date and don't be a fake friend. If you expect sex from a woman if you help her do something...try telling her up front that's what you expect. Wait! If a supposed "nice" guy were honest about his thoughts, it would go something like this:
girl: "Hey, I have to move this weekend. Can you help me?"
guy: "I will help you but expect you to have sex with me as payment for my time and trouble."
Now, this is NOT a nice guy at all. THIS IS a guy who is basically treating this woman like a common prostitute. That's not what I'd call nice. A nice person helps people like that because they like helping other people...NOT because they expect anything in return.
All a guy has to really do is have the balls to come right out and say his interest in a woman is romantic. If she's interested too...she'll date you. If she's not interested she won't. If a guy can't be honest about his intentions from the get go it's his own fault he wastes his time.
Now, that's where you're partially wrong. A "nice jerk" is in general a decent guy a good man, but knows how to get down and have fun. For example, teasing a woman about whatever is a "jerk" quality trait....A true nice guy is always this stereotypical gentleman....who is nice and rarely if never wants to say something thay he thinks will offend.....
Now, the nice jerk or the good guy...is a gentleman...he doesn't believe in hurting women...but, he isn't afraid to say things....he won't kiss a womans butt....if she freaks out over something "little" he won't get on his hands and knees and apologize....
A nice guy is more of a kiss up.....
A nice guy tries to make a perfect relationship....and at start, it's kind of cool...but at the end it gets very boring.....why? because there has been nothing but happy...and the nice man doing things to just make you happy all day....
Being nice wears out, just like anything....
If I give you the same piece of candy, three times a day for a week...you'd get sick of it....there would be no "flare" to it anymore........
Think of a nice jerk as a nice guy with "flare"...there is more to him than just....I'm so nice and generous...
Now, the part where you made the scenario of the girl being expected to do something....a little too blunt.....if you want to put it like that....then women do the SAME THING. Women will be nice to a man.....and expect him to go out with her....or be nice to her back......or something.....
It works both ways....not just men expect...so do women...everything has a motive...no matter how great a person is.