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Okay!Words are hollow. Those are the easiest ones to fvck quickly. They say it because they know they can't resist it so they try and just blurt it out hoping a guy doesn't see thru it
Okay!Words are hollow. Those are the easiest ones to fvck quickly. They say it because they know they can't resist it so they try and just blurt it out hoping a guy doesn't see thru it
This is exactly my experience. Women say all sorts of things. Don't worry about it. Simply proceed and seduce. No need to overthink it.Ive heard this before on a 1st date. Then proceeded to bang them on the first date or on the second date.
Proceed as normal. First date is always drinks. See if after 2 or 3 drinks her personality doesnt change.
If she is a higher quality/value woman, she may require more of an investment level than 1 or 2 dates. No worries, as long as the sexual contact is escalating, proceed.
I have much respect for you bwv. Though I disagree on your point. Honor is a language/ reality that men speak/live. Not women. So I will not speak it with them. Not breaking my word only matters when it's spoken to another maleThis message is to the lurkers and the less-experienced viewing this forum:
I agree that women (or at least, most) can be ruthless, conniving and vain etc... but I disagree on the action of using a woman. It's not right and it's not an action by men of honor and integrity. I won't lie. I've been tempted many times. However, if we justify such an action as.... "well, women do it too" then we are selling out our core values for pvssy. In other words, our own behavior becomes no better than of those we don't respect.
The above isn't a veiled put down to DonJuanjr or anyone else. I get it. When we are worked up, our mind isn't always thinking straight. What I'm saying is... in the long run, we will respect ourselves more for maintaining our sense of self-worth than for selling it out for an additional bedpost notch.
What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.
You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Absolutely it's a **** test. It's like when a girl says I'm not going to sleep with you I'm 5 minutes later she's touching your crotch. There's a few ways you can pass it so here are some examples that I like to use:Hi gents.
Simple question really:
Would you guys immediately disqualify/pass on a girl who says she's not into friend with benefits or casual hook-ups on first encounter?
There have been a couple of times I've met girls on OLD and during cold approach and they tell me this from the get go. I am not talking about "the talk" that plates have with you over time, but how some girls just throw it out immediately when you meet them and barely know them. I've always took this statement at face value (since I am not looking for a LTR) but recently I had a discussion with a buddy of mine who told me that this is basically a ****-test. Apparently, they say one thing but it means another. Makes me wonder whether I've disqualified them too quickly by taking their statement on face value.
How do you guys see this and approach these sort of throw-off statements?
-James
Isn't all that just falling into "her" frame though? Why not maintain your frame and be real with her?Absolutely it's a **** test. It's like when a girl says I'm not going to sleep with you I'm 5 minutes later she's touching your crotch. There's a few ways you can pass it so here are some examples that I like to use:
"I'm looking for my third wife so I am very serious about this.."
"As a man of God, we frown upon sins like friends with benefits."
"Wow slow down girl. I'm a virgin so you have to be gentle."
"Wow slow down, I don't know you well enough to be thinking that."
"Ah is that what you say to all the guys? That's a nice chat up line."
And remember to use the correct body language tone and intonation when you say one of these lines. Make sure it comes lighthearted with a smirk on your face and then you can just move the conversation on.
Although we don't agree, there's indeed mutual respect here. You spoke your truth and I spoke mine. That's all that we should expect from fellow men. In a world of forum anonymity, it's rare for members to disagree and still shake hands.I have much respect for you bwv. Though I disagree on your point. Honor is a language/ reality that men speak/live. Not women. So I will not speak it with them. Not breaking my word only matters when it's spoken to another male
I'd just ignore it and see what her body language says. I've had girls say that they were not that kind of girl, that they had a boyfriend or even that they were lesbian and had a girlfriend (and then 30 minutes later I was fingering her up against a wall).Hi gents.
Simple question really:
Would you guys immediately disqualify/pass on a girl who says she's not into friend with benefits or casual hook-ups on first encounter?
There have been a couple of times I've met girls on OLD and during cold approach and they tell me this from the get go. I am not talking about "the talk" that plates have with you over time, but how some girls just throw it out immediately when you meet them and barely know them. I've always took this statement at face value (since I am not looking for a LTR) but recently I had a discussion with a buddy of mine who told me that this is basically a ****-test. Apparently, they say one thing but it means another. Makes me wonder whether I've disqualified them too quickly by taking their statement on face value.
How do you guys see this and approach these sort of throw-off statements?
-James
I don't view it as manipulation. I just view it as her testing to see if you are the confident guy that you say that you are. The idea of passing the ship test is to show that you're not faced or bothered by what she said. It's interesting that we view it very differently but in my experience responding in a way that passes the sh*t test isn't falling into a frame because even the response isn't that logical.Isn't all that just falling into "her" frame though? Why not maintain your frame and be real with her?
If you believe it's a shyt test (which is a manipulation and bs), be real and tell her you're not seeking serious at the moment, wish her well, and let her fall into YOUR frame? Let her be the one scrambling around trying to find the perfect response to backtrack.
The reason why women give these shots tests is because they work. Most men are so thirsty, they scramble around trying to find the perfect response to pass the test, thus falling into her frame.
There was a recent thread discussing the power of not being afraid to walk away. It applies here and if you had an abundance mindset, you wouldn't be so thirsty for this one chick, and you'd walk away from her and any woman who give these manipulative shyt tests or who don't want what YOU want.
If she's not shyt testing and was being real with you, you should walk cause you're not on the same wavelength, wasting time and money that would be better spent on women who are more flexible and willing to take things one day at a time allowing things to happen naturally.
No need to lie or mislead her imo. That's as bad as her shyt test.
$.02.
That's a shyt test no matter how you slice and dice.I don't view it as manipulation. I just view it as her testing to see if you are the confident guy that you say that you are.
Basically this.Words are hollow. Those are the easiest ones to fvck quickly. They say it because they know they can't resist it so they try and just blurt it out hoping a guy doesn't see thru it
Exactly. If you step out of your ego and look at the conversation, you can easily see where you can embarrass her for playing these silly games. Which is the desired outcome of the congruency test. Not just for you, but also for her, because she can respect a man who doesn't fail the congruency tests.I would think a woman would be embarrassed to play that anti-slut game or testing for congruency or whatever game she's playing.
Men frequently err by talking too much. They often monopolize conversations, droning on and on about topics that bore women to tears. They think they're impressing the women when, in reality, they're depressing the women.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
I think there's a point here.Bro, this sounds contradictory to me. I guess you dont consider "playing the field" part of "using a woman".
Spinning plates (aka stringing girls along knowing they want exclusivity but you will probably never give it to them) its like the #1 advice of SoSuave. Im not saying I judge men who Spin Plates or "play the field" or that men should not do it. Im saying to me it kind of sounds like using the women.
I just had this happen again last night. Not in person, but over text. New girl. Said she wants to get to know first. I said "for sure. I'm not judgemental. It'll happen when the time is right". Whether or not I passed it or will pass another...How would you guys pass this test?
Like I stated, if you get this line, you're radiating too many 'player' vibes.Seems like most of you think this is a **** test or a congruency test.
How would you guys pass this test?
Agree & amplifyHow would you guys pass this test?
Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.