Girl leaves me alone in hospital after date

RickTheToad

Moderator
Joined
Apr 21, 2018
Messages
6,555
Reaction score
5,082
Location
Bridgeport, CT
@Baibars, if it helps, a few years ago I had kidney surgery for 12MM kidney stones. The female I was with for four months or so left the day of my surgery to go on vacation in another state with her sister (married). She then came back, claimed that she didn't know; which was BS. We fvcked a couple more times, but after that I knew we were done. She then continued to reach out every few months, but I went cold prior to that. I posted it here back in 2018. This is how pathetic some females are. They live in the moment and do not consider the future. Females do not usually grow out of this thought process until their 40's or 50s; which it's too late for most. That was my big eye opener with females in relationships. You need to always be ready to jet and move on.

Disgusting.
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
539
Reaction score
566
Age
30
Location
Germany
@Baibars, if it helps, a few years ago I had kidney surgery for 12MM kidney stones. The female I was with for four months or so left the day of my surgery to go on vacation in another state with her sister (married). She then came back, claimed that she didn't know; which was BS. We fvcked a couple more times, but after that I knew we were done. She then continued to reach out every few months, but I went cold prior to that. I posted it here back in 2018. This is how pathetic some females are. They live in the moment and do not consider the future. Females do not usually grow out of this thought process until their 40's or 50s; which it's too late for most. That was my big eye opener with females in relationships. You need to always be ready to jet and move on.

Disgusting.
Thanks for sharing it really helped. Yeah you're totally right, can't invest any feelings in such a person. I was in a city where i don't know anybody and i suddenly needed that surgery, felt like crap and she was the only person nearby. Family and friends are not allowed to visit here due to corona.
You're right i had my experience too and i should've moved on way faster but i was basically alone and ****ed up in that situation. Needed to deal with the fact that i made a very bad decision going to her place and being alone in that ****ing hospital.
It's not like we just had casual sex, we shared things about our lives, cuddled and had deep talks. She responded quick to my texts all the time but after our night and my sickness she turned into a completely different person.
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
539
Reaction score
566
Age
30
Location
Germany
First off guys, please stop generalizing -women this, women that.

I'm a woman and to the OP, goodness gracious, reading your original post, I care! And I'm just a stranger on the internet.

Her attitude was COLD, plain and simple, nevermind as a woman, as a decent human being!

No one said she has to date you or f&ck you again, but at the very least, might have chosen to be kind for goodness sake, jesus!

So how are you feeling now? Hope your surgery went well, and please don't give this chick on second thought.

She's a self entitled bytch imo, consider bullet dodged.
Thanks for understanding. Yeah thats what im saying that's basic behavior especially if that person is my guest and is a stranger in my town i couldn't act like that.

Surgery went well.. i was in hospital until today and i'm back home now. Wounds need to heal for some time, i will rest. I just regret it so hard that i went to her place. It wasn't worth it and i got myself into a lot of trouble.. maybe i wouldn't even get sick if i wouldn't go there.

Later i confronted her a bit and then she replied: '' i have no time bla bla, now YOU shown your true face'' that girl is crazy.
 

Blacksheep

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2018
Messages
1,531
Reaction score
1,058
Age
33
Location
Brazil
Hey guys I’m in a ****ed up situation rn. On Monday I drove 70 km to a girl that I met online. We chilled at her place and made out, slept together. The next morning my stomach hurt so much I couldn’t take it so she brought me to the hospital. I vomited and couldn’t even stand on my feet. The doctors said my appendix needs to be removed. The girl dropped me at the hospital and just left. She didn’t ask about my situation and when I asked her why she doesn’t care at all she said she wants to meet me when I’m healthy. She said she has other things going on in her life. I mean ok it was the first time we met each other but I wouldn’t react that cold and heartless. Now I’m in the hospital after surgery and I’m alone feeling like ****.

Am i overreacting? Should I drop that girl ?
You are not overreacting.

And if you should drop her it depends. You can use her only for meeting your sexual needs... Nothing more than that. That behavior she had was stupid.

But I personally would not date a girl like that.

Its not that it was the first date and she at least gave u a ride.

The truth is: humanity is dying. Human being are becoming more ignorant and egocentric each day.

You expected a good response from her, but keep in mind that we should not attach to our expectations. Things are the way they are... If it meets our expectations its ok, but it wont happen all the time.

I thinking a lot about good and evil lately. And my conclusion is getting something like:

Be good to the ones that are good to you. And be evil to the ones who are evil to you.

Its like the dark and light side. Do not attach to one side... Learn to use both. If both exist, we should learn about both sides. The same goes to every aspect of life.

Do not lie to the ones who are honest with you... But do lie to the ones who lies and manipulate you.

One more analogy: there is the past / present / future.

When you live in the present, you should use what youve learned from your past, evolving yourself in the present to create a better future. This idea can be applied to everything in life.

Hope you recover fast from it and can return safe to your city!
 

Blacksheep

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2018
Messages
1,531
Reaction score
1,058
Age
33
Location
Brazil
Again OLD. Lol
And they hate weakness. Even dying weakness.
And she just met you. Its a great story for her to tell her girlfriends later
Thats a great point.

And never trust or create any expectations over any OLD girl you meet. I've played that game over years... And I would not say all to dont generalize, but most of the girls Ive met on old apps doesnt worth a penny.
 

Konada

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2011
Messages
1,235
Reaction score
654
Can't wait for the sosuave version of this where posters tell the dude the HB is being a complete bytch.

"I fvcked her and suddenly her appendix burst. I brought her to the hospital and left her there. Now she goes cold on me and complains I didn't text her to see how she was doing.

Is she being a bytch?"
 

Kdw8

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 13, 2021
Messages
53
Reaction score
48
Are you offical boyfriend and girlfriend? If not then you should understand people have their own lives. I wouldn't want to play daddy to someone's sick daughter just bc I took them in a date :lol:. Nobody has to do anything for you, you're lucky she took you to the hospital mate.
 

Striker_93

Banned
Joined
Feb 4, 2022
Messages
447
Reaction score
474
Age
31
Are you offical boyfriend and girlfriend? If not then you should understand people have their own lives. I wouldn't want to play daddy to someone's sick daughter just bc I took them in a date :lol:. Nobody has to do anything for you, you're lucky she took you to the hospital mate.
Someone gets it......
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
539
Reaction score
566
Age
30
Location
Germany
Are you offical boyfriend and girlfriend? If not then you should understand people have their own lives. I wouldn't want to play daddy to someone's sick daughter just bc I took them in a date :lol:. Nobody has to do anything for you, you're lucky she took you to the hospital mate.
nice to have your point of view. We’re clearly raised under different circumstances so I cannot relate to you. But I have to accept that there are people like you out there. I just don’t want to have anything do with them and this time I couldn’t figure out that she’s a piece of **** early on. If she’d talk like you in the beginning I would save myself from a lot of trouble.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,641
Reaction score
1,349
Location
random
no mystery in this. women like winners. she has to see the winner in you somehow. it might be in a way that you and or others do not see but it must be. being sick (not your fault) is looser. it takes 10x more winner actions to offset even one looser action.

one date and one looser action (being sick). you would have to already have 10 winner dates first and sometimes even that is not enough as the light switch effect can occur for any looser action, even something not your fault. they do not care about reasons, only results.

now the girl's gossip group will sit around and tell how they would help in this case and sound all lovy dovy. but pretty much all will do what you experienced.

guys will care for the woman often in such a case if it was in reverse. men like to take care of women usually. most women outright tell that they do not want a man they have to take care of. this situation fits into that scenario. she clearly said that she will date you again when you are strong again. this is just women... I even see mothers set children aside that are not doing well and focus instead on the winner if there is one in the bunch.

if you ever find a woman that you like that does take care of you, keep her as it's very rare.
 

kavi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2022
Messages
764
Reaction score
649
Age
40
How about all the guys who sleep with a woman and then ghost, all the guys out there with large notch counts, maybe she thinks OP could be one of those. It works both ways. So many guys out there just wanna smash and then ghost so no wonder women dont respect guys.
 

derby1

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 10, 2017
Messages
3,300
Reaction score
3,441
It’s not. It’s a 1 hour drive and why should a man Limit himself if he has the opportunity?
she registered you as a loser for travelling so far, do you realise the sub conscious low value signals you have sent out by merely making this move?

You made her do NOTHING no INVESTMENT, in return for her mediocre fanny. You have basically told her lizard brain, you are so low on the dominance food scale, the big dog chucks you scraps

and you wonder why she ditched you like a bad habit?
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
539
Reaction score
566
Age
30
Location
Germany
she registered you as a loser for travelling so far, do you realise the sub conscious low value signals you have sent out by merely making this move?

You made her do NOTHING no INVESTMENT, in return for her mediocre fanny. You have basically told her lizard brain, you are so low on the dominance food scale, the big dog chucks you scraps

and you wonder why she ditched you like a bad habit?
to clarify I never said somewhere that I’m the most alpha most high value dude and I got treated poorly even though I’m such a badass. We were texting and having phone calls before, she made a good impression. She invited me and I said **** it let’s go and have fun.
we had fun and even then everything was fine. She knew all the time that I’m not a boss level guy and I didn’t paint myself as such. She dropped her pants even when she saw my little car.
Everything changed the next morning when I got sick. I met girls before and I’m well aware that girls can easily delete and ghost if they don’t like you. I accept that.
The only thing that I don’t consider normal is how ruthless she acted when I got sick. dating is different than having a guest that is sick and you know you’re the only person he has around right now.
i accept all criticism and blame you have for me but stop normalising or even justifying bad behavior just because I’m not high value enough.
 

Stoic

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2018
Messages
645
Reaction score
698
Age
41
Op, get it together. Why do you have such high expectations of a person you just met? She is only slightly more than a stranger at this point.
Your mindset is off.

A woman's job is not to care for a man that she just met. You weren't going to die. She's not a nurse or a doctor. She drove you to get care because she couldn't provide it herself. You should thank God or your lucky stars for that.

Men take care of themselves. We are responsible for our own health. We take care of our own emotional state.
 

Baibars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
539
Reaction score
566
Age
30
Location
Germany
Op, get it together. Why do you have such high expectations of a person you just met? She is only slightly more than a stranger at this point.
Your mindset is off.

A woman's job is not to care for a man that she just met. You weren't going to die. She's not a nurse or a doctor. She drove you to get care because she couldn't provide it herself. You should thank God or your lucky stars for that.

Men take care of themselves. We are responsible for our own health. We take care of our own emotional state.
you’re right. Everything happened so fast and I wasn’t able to deal with it in that Situation combined with her distancing herself from me. I have to get myself together.
 

Konada

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2011
Messages
1,235
Reaction score
654
OP, be glad that you saw this side of her this early.

No matter how you look at it, this is a massive red flag if your goal is to find a LTR. A woman is her most vulnerable right after getting fvcked and the only explanation why she did a 180 is because caring is not in her nature, or she has lost the ability to pair bond. both of which are red flags.

Obviously you are invested in her, otherwise you wouldn't have drove 70km to meet her and be so upset over how she treated you. If you are able to detach, I would suggest relegating this woman to nothing more than a sport fvck.

Also, I would agree that the level of investment here is way off balance. You drove 70km to meet a chick you never met, while all she had to do was to show up looking pretty IN HER OWN HOUSE. Such imbalance never ends well, especially at a start of an interaction.
 
Last edited:

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,309
Reaction score
11,275
It’s not. It’s a 1 hour drive and why should a man Limit himself if he has the opportunity?
70 km = 43 miles. Depending on traffic, that might not even be one hour. That is borderline long distance though. In my experiences, I've had a challenging enough time with women within 10-15 miles of me, so 43 would be too much. Also, I start my interactions in-person, which reduces long distance options. Long distance options can be filtered out on a swipe app quite easily though, which is what I did when I used swipe apps.

Can't wait for the sosuave version of this where posters tell the dude the HB is being a complete bytch.

"I fvcked her and suddenly her appendix burst. I brought her to the hospital and left her there. Now she goes cold on me and complains I didn't text her to see how she was doing.

Is she being a bytch?"
I would like to think many guys would at least see how she's doing in the hospital.
 
Last edited:

Konada

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2011
Messages
1,235
Reaction score
654
70 km = 43 miles. Depending on traffic, that might not even be one hour. That is borderline long distance though. In my experiences, I've had a challenging enough time with women within 10-15 miles of me, so 43 would be too much. Also, I start my interactions in-person, which reduces long distance options. Long distance options can be filtered out on a swipe app quite easily though, which is what I did when I used swipe apps.
The issue is not that he drove 70km, but rather the relative level of investment he made vs hers cannot be compared. He had to take an hour's drive while she only had to show up looking sexy at her doorstep.
 
Top