Girl deleted my profile after date.

BackInTheGame78

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Yes. I thought Ok., this must be efficient. I went on 3 dates from OLD (out of the hundreds of men who reached out to me via OLD.)

Each of the 3 men was blown away because I am *MUCH* prettier in person than I am in photos. Each became visibly nervous & commented thusly (that I was more attractive in person). While each of these 3 guys were worse looking in person than in photos (2 of them saying they were 5'11" when reality was more like 5'7", which means I towered over them in 5 inch heels.)

I thought Jesus. What a bunch of false advertising. So I blew off OLD after a sum total of 2 weeks (1 week each, 3 years apart.) I also found wading through a sea of mediocrity to be time consuming and much more investment than it was worth. My time is valuable. Why waste it sifting through OLD duds for hours when I can be out in an environment where I can enjoy myself and potentially meet someone who is both attractive and charming?

I mean even now, men hit on me like crazy. There is something about me beyond looks, perhaps confidence & sass, that men find beguiling. None of that comes across really in photos, and my face can look more angular in photos than in person, I'm very attractive, but not as photogenic as some women.

So for those reasons I ditched OLD. I've always gotten great results IRL so stick with what works.
Guys have it way easier on OLD. Women mostly meet creeps, weirdos, sex freaks, jailbirds, lame or boring men that can't hold convos or ones that have no job/car/anything going for them.

Most women on OLD at least halfway have their sh!t together...plenty of easy ways to screen out fraudulent pics or baby daddy/other drama issues quickly.

Kinda sad actually that women would get so excited after meeting me that they would literally thank me for "being normal". The bar is so low for men right now that you could almost crawl over it.

Being "normal" and able to handle your end of a conversation has never taken you further as a man as it does today.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Guys have it way easier on OLD. Women mostly meet creeps, weirdos, sex freaks, jailbirds, lame or boring men that can't hold convos or ones that have no job/car/anything going for them.
Yes, whereas guys only have to deal with psychos, borderlines, attention wh0res, scammers, and (OnlyFans) sex workers.

OLD is a cesspool of broken people trying to find some kind of glue to get themselves fixed.
 

BeExcellent

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Agree @SW15 about 300 options on OLD versus 10 in real life. But those 300 options are garbage because they are not pre-selected. Too much time doing the selecting, and without meaningful context.

Contrast that with 10 IRL options who can afford to be in the venue where I am, and who I can conversate with to elucidate intelligence, achievement, personality and values. Of those 10 perhaps only 1 or 2 are attractive enough to take seriously.

Still. My experience tells me I only need one. So if I meet lets say 2 per month who are of interest?

Well that's 24 a year. Only I've never in my life made it that far....some gorgeous man always locks me down quickly.

Remember. I had been single for 2 hours when I met my husband. TWO HOURS.

So I like my IRL results, OLD is a shjt show although I do know couples who met that way.
 

SW15

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OLD is a shjt show although I do know couples who met that way.
Most of the newer LTRs have formed online (swipe apps & social media). It is now the primary way couples form.

Far fewer couples are now starting their interactions through a social circle facilitation, through a bar approach, through a non-bar approach (including through college campus activities), or in the workplace.

The way interactions are starting has had a massive impact on the sexual marketplace as a whole.

The swipe apps (and dating websites before them) have always been a shiit show in my experience.

As for your experience, you had the typical female experience of abundance online. Narrowing through that abundance is a challenge and a source of frustration for many women.

So if I meet lets say 2 per month who are of interest?

Well that's 24 a year. Only I've never in my life made it that far....some gorgeous man always locks me down quickly.

Remember. I had been single for 2 hours when I met my husband. TWO HOURS.
If you had 24 good options in a 12 month period, that's still very good abundance. You've not even been sitting on the market close to that long. The two hours time frame is extraordinary and outlier level. Even something like 2 weeks to 2 months is a short time frame.

who can afford to be in the venue where I am
I think it is important that you mention venue. When you have been approached, how much more frequently have you been approached in bar/nightlife venues as compared to non-bar venues?

There are some higher end non-bar venues too. In the grocery store category, Whole Foods is considered higher end. There are also higher end malls and shopping centers too. I can't imagine too many men lingering around a higher end boutique store looking for approach targets.

In the 2011 book "Day Bang", Roosh discussed the differences between approach targets in mall department stores vs. other types of shops inside of indoor malls. When Roosh wrote "Day Bang", he was in his early 30s and was reflecting upon being a 20s/early 30s guy seeking 20 something women in malls. He did acknowledge that mall department stores could be an option for older men seeking older women. In thinking about an upper end department store like Nordstrom or Neiman Marcus, it would be possible for a man to do approaches on a woman in there. I don't think there would be a lot of men who would choose to spend time in Nordstrom or Neiman Marcus to do approaches.
 

BeExcellent

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Most of the newer LTRs have formed online (swipe apps & social media). It is now the primary way couples form.

Far fewer couples are now starting their interactions through a social circle facilitation, through a bar approach, through a non-bar approach (including through college campus activities), or in the workplace.

The way interactions are starting has had a massive impact on the sexual marketplace as a whole.

The swipe apps (and dating websites before them) have always been a shiit show in my experience.

As for your experience, you had the typical female experience of abundance online. Narrowing through that abundance is a challenge and a source of frustration for many women.



If you had 24 good options in a 12 month period, that's still very good abundance. You've not even been sitting on the market close to that long. The two hours time frame is extraordinary and outlier level. Even something like 2 weeks to 2 months is a short time frame.



I think it is important that you mention venue. When you have been approached, how much more frequently have you been approached in bar/nightlife venues as compared to non-bar venues?

There are some higher end non-bar venues too. In the grocery store category, Whole Foods is considered higher end. There are also higher end malls and shopping centers too. I can't imagine too many men lingering around a higher end boutique store looking for approach targets.

In the 2011 book "Day Bang", Roosh discussed the differences between approach targets in mall department stores vs. other types of shops inside of indoor malls. When Roosh wrote "Day Bang", he was in his early 30s and was reflecting upon being a 20s/early 30s guy seeking 20 something women in malls. He did acknowledge that mall department stores could be an option for older men seeking older women. In thinking about an upper end department store like Nordstrom or Neiman Marcus, it would be possible for a man to do approaches on a woman in there. I don't think there would be a lot of men who would choose to spend time in Nordstrom or Neiman Marcus to do approaches.
To respond to @SW15:

Venue is important because it does some pre-selection for you. If you are at a gallery opening at an art gallery (for example) you are going to meet people who value art and are going, typically, to be more sophisticated, cultured, and higher net worth. These people also share an interest with you.

If you are at a nightclub where a metal band is playing you are going to meet people who share that interest.

If you are at a white table cloth steakhouse where steak costs $65 entry level & a glass of wine averages $25 a glass? That presents an entry barrier for those who cannot afford to be there. This again creates pre-selection. And there are high net worth individuals who gravitate to such venues as a way to do a couple of things:

1. Enjoy a great meal/glass of wine/perhaps live music...

2. Be open to meeting others who enjoy great food/wine and music....

3. The environment pre-selects for a certain patron profile, compatible with my own.

I think day game or night game is quite canned in the sense that picking a locale (let's use your Whole Foods example) is entirely counter productive if you are going there with the sole intent/focus of approaching women. I shop for groceries at WFM and have for many years. I've had men approach me there a number of times...

Each time the guy seemed desperate, canned and creepy. He's not there to shop for groceries....he's there to game women, not realizing how awkwardly obvious that is.

My point is this: Have an interesting life and go do things that interest you. If you meet a cool chick while doing something you enjoy that you were already doing? Happy bonus. Never go anywhere for the express purpose of "approaching women", you'll come across all wrong and savvy women will smell that eagerness on you like dog doo.

Expensive/exclusive venues pre-select against men who are cruising to meet women unless they are higher net worth where $$$$ is not a barrier. This has a number of advantages. I am in a venue where higher net worth/more successful people go, which means men I meet there have a more achievement based mindset and positive thinking patterns. It means I meet men who I better relate to & have more in common with.

I met my husband in a nightclub where a metal band was playing. I happened to be there to meet friends or I would not have gone. And one of the things I now deal with is his discomfort around highly successful men in my social environs. He is accutely aware that he is not as successful as they are & this bugs him, even when the guys are cool. But I'm not doing dinner at Olive Garden. I prefer Maestro's even if I have to foot the bill, which I often do.

The nightclub does not pre-select as well as an expensive steak house with a happy hour & sophisticated clientele.

So yes, venue matters.
 

SW15

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I think day game or night game is quite canned in the sense that picking a locale (let's use your Whole Foods example) is entirely counter productive if you are going there with the sole intent/focus of approaching women. I shop for groceries at WFM and have for many years. I've had men approach me there a number of times...

Each time the guy seemed desperate, canned and creepy. He's not there to shop for groceries....he's there to game women, not realizing how awkwardly obvious that is.
I like that we are working with this Whole Foods example. I have done approaches at Whole Foods before but I think my mindset of going to Whole Foods was likely different than the men who approached you at Whole Foods.

On the occasions when I have done approaches at Whole Foods, I have done approaches when buying things that I need to run my kitchen. While it is not my favorite grocery store, it is a good place.

There is an art to doing grocery store approaches at any grocery store. Those men who approached you in Whole Foods didn't quite pull it off as well as some men who do it.

I've become less of a proponent of the idea of lingering in a grocery to do approaches. Lingering is what it sounds like. While a man has items already in his basket, he waits/walks around the store looking for targets. Lingering will help in getting more approaches but it is less organic and often less fun to do. Lingering can be successful but it's higher effort and often less fun.

I always did set a time limit for approaching even when I did practice lingering.

I'd rather meet someone at any grocery store (I have approached at most of them) when not lingering and just doing my regular shopping.

My point is this: Have an interesting life and go do things that interest you. If you meet a cool chick while doing something you enjoy that you were already doing? Happy bonus. Never go anywhere for the express purpose of "approaching women", you'll come across all wrong and savvy women will smell that eagerness on you like dog doo.
The general point is a good one.

A lot of men and women have below average day-to-day routines for meeting the opposite sex. I think that it would be useful for a lot of men and women to alter their day-to-day routines. This will tend to fall on men more since we are the initiators.

Most men approaching in malls are generally there for approaching women. I found doing mall sessions to be often disappointing.

I think it is possible to do something you enjoy but in a setting more conducive to meeting people. This might require an alteration to someone's usual routine.
 

Dr.Suave

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To respond to @SW15:
And one of the things I now deal with is his discomfort around highly successful men in my social environs. He is accutely aware that he is not as successful as they are & this bugs him, even when the guys are cool.
D@mn. This sounds interesting.


To respond to @SW15:
Have an interesting life and go do things that interest you. If you meet a cool chick while doing something you enjoy that you were already doing? Happy bonus. Never go anywhere for the express purpose of "approaching women", you'll come across all wrong and savvy women will smell that eagerness on you
I agree with this. Going to a place/activity you dont even enjoy just to game women doesnt sound very suave.
 
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