Current GF / Lost interest in Sex

[BackInTheGame78]

I hit the gym 4 times a week.

i study, read books, and financially im doing well ahead the curve.

im already fully occupied, she is not. She is at home also working from home and she finds nothing interesting.

its work-netflix-sleep for her.

i told her to fill up her time with activities to essentially free up space from one another but she says she will and she never does.

And yet she still just isn't interested enough in you and would rather "do nothing" as you put it.

See, none of these things matter on their own to a particular woman.

The reason this is talked about frequently is to give yourself the best odds of attracting women to you.

However, once they are with you, this rarely is going to be what makes them stay or not stay, remain attracted or not attracted, want to fvck you or not fvck you.

It's all those other things that are involved in interaction with a person that cause those things and either she wasn't that interested to begin with or you caused her interest to drop over time by not doing well in those interactions repeatedly.

 

[Barrister]

OP,

This woman sounds legit depressed. And frankly, you aren't married to her, you share no children together, and it is negatively impacting you. I didn't read through the entirety of the thread but I hope that, like you were advised at the beginning of it, you have decided to exit and move on.

 

[Roober]

Here’s a few tips I use to keep my 7 year relationship begging me for sex daily

1. Good d1ck game - I put this first because it’s where many men fail. Theres a lot to it, so I won’t dive in to it too much. It also fixes most of other problems. When’s she’s mad, give her the D. When she’s sad, give her the D. When she’s distant, give her the D.

2. Task her - go read Pimpology by Pimpin Ken. “A 304 without instruction is destined for destruction”. Another point I’m not going to elaborate on too much. But in its simplest form… Task her, reward her with the D (see point 1)

3. Flirt all day every day - I make my girl think about sex all the time. This can be done by slapping her ass, pinch her nipple, playing with her earlobes, or anything else.

4. Treat her like your little sister - be playful, have fun, joke around, be goofy, and most importantly… be unpredictable. I prank the crap out of my girl because it fits with my personality. Do what fits best with your personality.

Your job, fitness, and money (you’re broke btw) mean squat. You will lose all day to the fun loser with solid d1ck game.

 

[Gamisch]

Update?

Again such an quite intensive thread with a serious problem that dies because there's no update.

And I GET THAT. Yes fellas, 99% of the time men will just "let it all slide" and continue the relationship. Been there done that.

The advice given ( to dump her due to the lack of affection/ sex) is perhaps a tad too radical.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Update?

Again such an quite intensive thread with a serious problem that dies because there's no update.

And I GET THAT. Yes fellas, 99% of the time men will just "let it all slide" and continue the relationship. Been there done that.

The advice given ( to dumb her due to the lack of affection/ sex) is perhaps a tad too radical.

It's not really too radical because at the end of the day the most important thing you have is time. No matter how much money you make nobody can buy more time.

To spend several months or years wasting it with someone who is never going to work out long term and with the end result pretty much already determined at this point, is not a wise use of your most precious resource.

 

[Gamisch]

It's not really too radical because at the end of the day the most important thing you have is time. No matter how much money you make nobody can buy more time.

To spend several months or years wasting it with someone who is never going to work out long term and with the end result pretty much already determined at this point, is not a wise use of your most precious resource.

I agree to the fullest, but I also think that OP choose the status quo , maybe he can hit it once or twice and that's enough to prolong the situation for at least another 6 months..

Let's be real: most men rather have a woman close by who acts like this than having no woman ..

 

[jhonny9546]

I'm interested in women that have some intellectual curiosity about the world now.

Me too! But when you ask her, "What you're reading about?" and she show you "50 shades of gray" or the next "porn" novel, you actually understand.
It's rare to find intellectual women.
They start reading just because other women told them to do it.
Effetto carrozzone

OP,

Sometimes a relationship has simply run its course and it is time to move on. In your case, it is past time to move on. A lot of guys will comment on "always keeping things interesting" to prevent a woman from getting bored and looking elsewhere. The truth is this is a gross oversimplification. Sometimes people just aren't a fit together no matter what a man does to try to keep it exciting. I agree with the other posters that she is depressed and is blaming you for that. In truth, this is a HER problem, not a you problem. The writing is on the wall and you are burying your head in the sand and sticking around. Do yourself a favor and exit.

Accept that the transition may not be easy. Also understand that it is temporary, and life always works itself out so long as you are doing what you need to do. Cut ties and look forward to a fresh start. You will be glad you did.

I don't really know how you guys can have this strenght!
I'm really envious of you. How could you dare to do something like this? How could you be so sure to have the tools and skillset to start again, find another women and be in another LTR again at a given age?
This is really what I'm here for.
I wish I could do it.

When she’s sad, give her the D. When she’s distant, give her the D.

OP actually said that she is depressed, so we might say she's sad, and she don't want the D.
In your case, she is not depressed and she want the D from you.
So this might not be the case?

 

[DJ Novice]

I’ve found that once the desire, quality and/or quantity of s*x starts to decline from either partner it’s very hard to keep the relationship going.

You can get companionship and social, intellectual, social and spiritual connection/enjoyment either by yourself or with friends and family (and pets for some).

Physical connection and s*x is the one thing a woman can provide that others can’t (apart from giving birth to and raising children which I’m excluding for the purposes of this discussion, this is something women can offer apart from s*x that can offer meaning and purpose to your life).

Ask this of your current partners - excluding being a mother to your kids if you have any, if they didn’t offer s*x to you that was to your liking would you still actually want to hang around them for any length of time? If you answer yes then consider yourself fortunate.

 

[jhonny9546]

Ask this of your current partners - excluding being a mother to your kids if you have any, if they didn’t offer s*x to you that was to your liking would you still actually want to hang around them for any length of time? If you answer yes then consider yourself fortunate.

Good point!

Consider this: You can fall in love for "sexual desire," "companionship," or the warmth you feel with a specific woman. This emotional connection can sustain a relationship, especially since, as you've noted, sexual desire often fades over time. While daily tricks and PUA techniques can help, nature ultimately takes its course.

What makes your friendships strong? Is it shared interests or the history you have together? Likely both.

Many couples who have been together for over 20 years face sexual issues, yet they remain good friends and share their lives. If they can thrive without intense sexual desire and instead focus on their connection and mutual respect, why can't others? Just because sexual desire diminishes doesn't mean the relationship must end. If the emotional bond remains strong, the need for sex may become less significant.

I've spent four months single and found that I value the connection before sex more than the physical act itself.
I had no sex in those 4 months and focused only on myself.

 

[Westminster]

Good point!

Consider this: You can fall in love for "sexual desire," "companionship," or the warmth you feel with a specific woman. This emotional connection can sustain a relationship, especially since, as you've noted, sexual desire often fades over time. While daily tricks and PUA techniques can help, nature ultimately takes its course.

What makes your friendships strong? Is it shared interests or the history you have together? Likely both.

Many couples who have been together for over 20 years face sexual issues, yet they remain good friends and share their lives. If they can thrive without intense sexual desire and instead focus on their connection and mutual respect, why can't others? Just because sexual desire diminishes doesn't mean the relationship must end. If the emotional bond remains strong, the need for sex may become less significant.

I've spent four months single and found that I value the connection before sex more than the physical act itself.
I had no sex in those 4 months and focused only on myself.

Possibly. If you're really quite old - and I'm talking in your 60s or 70s. Otherwise, a dead bedroom is the sign of a dying relationship.

 

[Westminster]

I agree to the fullest, but I also think that OP choose the status quo , maybe he can hit it once or twice and that's enough to prolong the situation for at least another 6 months..

Let's be real: most men rather have a woman close by who acts like this than having no woman ..

I've actually come to the opposite conclusion inasmuch as I'd rather be without a woman than be in a sexless relationship. I know that sounds old-fashioned but ultimately that's what women are for: sex.

The only caveat would be if you're both old and your sex drive has totally evaporated. Then I suppose it ceases to be a problem - although I'm not quite there yet so I wouldn't know!

 

[Gamisch]

I've actually come to the opposite conclusion inasmuch as I'd rather be without a woman than be in a sexless relationship. I know that sounds old-fashioned but ultimately that's what women are for: sex.

The only caveat would be if you're both old and your sex drive has totally evaporated. Then I suppose it ceases to be a problem - although I'm not quite there yet so I wouldn't know!

Personally? Yes . Generally? No.

I am on your side, but when I look around me I see that a lotta men will stay in a miserable relationship, or even worst: create a miserable situation by going PP bro without any mutual attraction, live together asap, or accepting "situation-ships" where the woman turn him into a cuckold.

 

[Westminster]

Personally? Yes . Generally? No.

I am on your side, but when I look around me I see that a lotta men will stay in a miserable relationship, or even worst: create a miserable situation by going PP bro without any mutual attraction, live together asap, or accepting "situation-ships" where the woman turn him into a cuckold.

You're right. I've done it myself in the past, largely because there were children involved. I wouldn't do it again though.