First of all, let just just point something out to the guys reading this thread:
2_intense2 said:
what I want is brutal honesty, and who can do that better than guys?
Interesting concept, isn't it? That a female thinks of a GUY when she wants brutal honesty? Something for you all to think about. Girls don't want sugar coated lines and Don Juan behaviour. Girls just want you to be a MAN, and do what MEN do--and that's be strong, have strong convictions, and convey those convictions with strength.
Just a thought for you guys to ponder...
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Now, on to the thread starter...
I read the whole thread, and it's still hard to pinpoint any one thing you are doing wrong. So rather than do that, I'll say that you need to be a WOMAN.
I spend a lot of time telling the guys here that they need to be MEN and start acting like MEN, but when a girl comes here and wants advice, I will tell her just the opposite. You are a WOMAN, so start acting like one!
First of all, ATTRACTION. That's the crux of any relationship isn't it? Where I would tell a man that his looks don't matter for attraction, I'm telling you that looks matter so greatly that it's RIDICULOUS. Part of being a woman is looking good. This means that if you are overweight, that you change the way you eat (notice I didn't say "go on a diet" because the change has to be PERMANENT), exercise (you really don't want to go to the gym per se, because you don't ahve to build "muscle"), rather you need some cardio (like jogging, walking, etc.) to get your body into shape.
STYLE. You need to analyze the way you are dressing and the make up you wear. Too much make up is a turn off. Instead, you want to wear make up and jewelry that compliment your body (consult a fashion expert for this if you don't already know). The clothes you wear are probably the main thing. If you have a nice body (and you WILL if you get your diet and exercise in place) then you need to show that body off! And by that I don't mean dress "slutty" (because guys don't respect sluts), but you need to dress HOT! Let your pants hug your body just right (not skin tight), and wear cute shirts and jewelry to compliment it. You want to look FEMININE, because that's what guys are looking for--A WOMAN! Accessorize with the right type of purse and you'll be all set on the attraction end. Guys want WOMEN, and and they LOVE femininty, so for the love of God be feminine!
Does that sound sexist? Good, because "sexists" usually know the difference between men and women.
Now, onto other important things. Another major point that is stressed toards guys is to ACT...to APPROACH. It is their job to come to you, not yours to go to them. So let them come to you (and trust me if you get my first piece of advice right, they will come). Just as a guy's job is to APPROACH, your job is to
RESPOND!!!
The right responses to the right approaches will drive a guy WILD! Pay attention to the girls who seem to have guys fawning all over them and pay attention to the way they respond. Notice how they are not clingy? Notice how they have "options"? You don't want to give away the farm to a guy right away. You also want to make him work for it. Yes, make him EARN you, for you are the PRIZE!
Yes, guys, she is the prize too. The "I'm the prize" thinking goes both ways and creates a challenge that in turn drives attraction. Don't let a guy disrespect you. Don't call him every three seconds. Don't be bossy, MAKE HIM PICK WHERE YOU GO ON THE DATES!
Also, learn to talk right. Guys get bored when you sit around and prattle about yourself all the time. Guys have something that is your greatest ally as a woman: HIS EGO. If you learn how to stroke his ego, you'll make him go nuts! A girl who asks questions that guys can answer beautifully, will be the prize to any guy.
INTELLIGENCE. Don't get bent on just your looks alone. While they are your number one friend and ally, they aren't EVERYTHING. Most guys want some form of intelligence to their girl. You don't have to be a genious (because in fact, being TOO smart is actually not as attractive to a guy), but knowing a few things here and there and having a career goal will go a long ways.
Spend some time getting inside of yourself and getting the inside right. Figure out what you want to do and where you want to be, and then go for it. A woman who knows what she wants and how to get what she wants is extremely attractive to a guy. So figure out what you want, get your life straightened out from the inside out, and fix your appearance and you'll find that you'll have your pick of guys.
Read up on femininty and being a WOMAN. In fact, read the biography of Eleanor Roosevelt as she is probably the most classic case of feminity and strength wrapped into one I've ever known.
Those are just a few tips for you, without knowing crap about you.
