2nd time gf needs space

Chi Town

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@Chi Town
How do I get the attraction and love back up. There must be a way?
Sure, go no contact for 2 years, but by then you will have moved on so it's a mot issue.

Take this loss like a man, your one step closer to being stronger. It's time for you to be reborn.
 

Spaz

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Didn't I say to tell her you won't put up with the bullshiet then walk away ?

I was being gentle then, to get you to trained and learning how to frame yourself.

If she's begging to come back, let her suffer some more, more likely you've moved on by then.

If she doesn't you get to keep your dignity and frame.

The brutal honesty here is and it's 100% fact, that once a woman loses interest/respect in a man there's no turning back from it. We could go in detail on this topic alone but it's best served on another thread.
 

lamath

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Ok guys I've made up my mind. When she messages me I'm gonna tell her. I do love her but I'm not sure how I feel about us right now so I just need some space and time to think
Dont tell her that
This is the AFC way

Tell her you wont tolerate what she is doing(dont even listen to her explanation, dont argue) or ghost.
 

niceguytoalphamale

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Dont tell her that
This is the AFC way

Tell her you wont tolerate what she is doing(dont even listen to her explanation, dont argue) or ghost.
Doing this! That was good advice. How the heck are you only a senior don jaun? Moderaters . moderate this man!
 

niceguytoalphamale

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Dont tell her that
This is the AFC way

Tell her you wont tolerate what she is doing(dont even listen to her explanation, dont argue) or ghost.
I'm just going no contact until she reaches out for me to come back if she doesn't tell me to come back in her texts while I'm silent and just wants validation and attention I'm nexting sloot lol
 

lamath

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I'm just going no contact until she reaches out for me to come back if she doesn't tell me to come back in her texts while I'm silent and just wants validation and attention I'm nexting sloot lol
NC is good however when she reach out, and you know she will.
Dont anwser wait as long as you can what she is doing is not acceptable and make sure she gets it
 

niceguytoalphamale

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NC is good however when she reach out, and you know she will.
Dont anwser wait as long as you can what she is doing is not acceptable and make sure she gets it
@lamath thank you bro. She will come back I know this but I'm not going back until she is begging and crying for me to come back she needs to learn I'm not a option I'm a priority.
 

The Diver

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Im going no contact
Ok guys I've made up my mind. When she messages me I'm gonna tell her. I do love her but I'm not sure how I feel about us right now so I just need some space and time to think
just use her as a booty call.
Doing this! That was good advice.

Your replies constantly changing.
The fact is that you are still in love with her, want to find a way back to her, and
you won't listen to any of the advises telling you to move on.
Looks like you'll have to learn the lesson the hard way.
 

lamath

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Your replies constantly changing.
The fact is that you are still in love with her, want to find a way back to her, and
you won't listen to any of the advises telling you to move on.
Looks like you'll have to learn the lesson the hard way.
Sometime you are just to close and it get you blind
I think he know whats best but deep down he dont want to do it.

I hope things work out for him but from our unbiased perspective it does look bad
 

The Duke

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Here are 3 examples of what happens when they exhibit poor behavior and you cut them off:

1. Dated this girl for several weeks. Nothing serious. She showed up at a bar I was at one night way later than she said she would arrive. She arrives about the time I told her I was originally leaving. When she arrived she gets mad because I refused to pay for her drink. I had things to do in the morning and she had no concern about what was important to me. When I told her I was leaving she started insulting me. For the next 6wks I get random texts/calls from her begging to see me again, how great I was, and that she was sorry for her poor behavior. Not once did I reply to any of it. Even got a few nude pics trying to suck me back in.

2. Had another girl this past summer that neglected to tell me about a son she had after 2months of dating. She left her son behind at the age of 16 shortly after the father died. This totally goes against my value system. I refuse to surround myself around people who do things like this. I tried to better understand it, and she grew more angry. I told her she should leave. For several weeks she texts me apologies and I didn't respond to any of it.

2. I had a live in gf of 2yrs acting up, being overly dramatic, bitchy, etc. I got tired of it and told her she needed to move out and go work on herself. We could still talk but I was done dating. I cared a lot for her and saw a lot of potential and good things in her. But there was nothing else I could do to that would convince her i wasn't playing around anymore. Me kicking her out got her attention. She started reading self help books, went to counseling twice a week and made a lot of progress. After I was convinced she had improved, we started dating again and she eventually moved back in with me. Things were much better this go around. She took me seriously this time and gained a ton of respect for me.

Figure out what you will and won't tolerate. Keep your side of the street clean. Stand your ground. Draw the line in the sand and walk when you feel violated. There is a time and a place to sit down and discuss issues, but very few women respond well to this. Most of them need to see the hammer drop and you withdrawing before they take notice. And some things shouldn't even be discussed.
 

051AV

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Time to say to her things are not working out we need to go our separate ways she will go fvcking ape ****, you have the upper hand, grow a pair and tell her flat out your done.
 

Skyline

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I want you to make a brand new Tinder account. It doesn't even have to be your real photos.

Buy the 1 month for unlimited swipes(OPTIONAL. just be sure to dislike everyone until you find her instead of liking) Set your age range at 5 years older and the youngest you can go (18).

Now keep swiping until you find your girlfriend. I guarantee you that she will have recent photos, with an updated bio, on there.

I'm assuming she lives nearby so it shouldn't take long. But Tinder allows you to move your matching preferences to ANY city/state/location. You can only move it with the paid feature though.

This should be a wake up call for you.

People leave a considerable amount of bread crumbs online. I'm actually amazed that people are oblivious to this fact.
 

Spaz

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I broke up with her and told her I'll be over to collect my things as you can see in the message. I'm so broken guys
You have the makings of a great man. You just proved it by breaking up with her and keeping your dignity. Everyone here who's been through breakups will say the same.

It's her loss as she can't see it.

Take the emotional punishment, make sure you are not alone, go out, mingle around with some close friends. It's okay to be sad and it's normal.

If you feel like venting, go ahead and let it all out.
 

niceguytoalphamale

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You have the makings of a great man. You just proved it by breaking up with her and keeping your dignity. Everyone here who's been through breakups will say the same.

It's her loss as she can't see it.

Take the emotional punishment, make sure you are not alone, go out, mingle around with some close friends. It's okay to be sad and it's normal.

If you feel like venting, go ahead and let it all out.
I know what's happened @Spaz she was talking to someone else all along and didn't want to hurt me. I feel so crushed as I loved her sooo much. She goes for guys that do drugs and beat her up. I'm moving on she may come back in the future. She still has me on Facebook though? Why is this?
 

Spaz

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She still has me on Facebook though? Why is this?
Doesn't matter now. She's been dismissed by you.

And now it's time to dismiss her from social media.

After that, it's a progression of dismissals in your mind of her.

Take a step by step approach, this is how a man dismisses a woman until she has become irrelevant.
 
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