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This is not going to end well for you, her, her partner, your partner and your child. Can you really see anything good coming from this?

You feel like this now but you don't know how you will feel once the reality changes and she is no longer there and seeing other guys. I used to feel the same way in my past relationship - I became quite complacent and didn't care at all really - yet once she did actually leave for good, it...

There will probably come a point down the road when she's moved on, when she takes a look back over her shoulder at you and thinks 'I hope he doesn't think badly of me for what I did, I should be an awesome person and wish him well, maybe even see if he still wants back into my life'... It...

Come on man, she would see right through that veiled, haughty attitude. Your life is not exponentially better than hers at the moment and even if it was, so what? Do you think she's having this hard time deliberating, agonising whether or not to contact you? No, she is most definitely not. I...

How are you going to make these revenue streams? What services are you going to offer people that they will want to pay you for? Not being negative, just interested. I've worked in China and I'm currently working in advertising in London and I've never heard of anyone who can make money just by...

Excellent responses, thank you guys! I generally find people with an inflated sense of self importance and grandiosity really off-putting and wouldn't want to fall into this category - disappointingly however, these are often the kind of people that I see succeed almost every week, especially...

Sometimes I find myself fantasising about certain things - and I realise a little bit of everyday fantasy is normal - but I'm talking about unrealistic thought processes and narcissistic reveries which take you far from reality and ultimately waste your time and even raise false perceptions...

I'm in the UK and I got mine tested very recently after a very long bout of reactive depression that wasn't shifting and very low levels of motivation and self-loathing. I felt there might be something wrong biologically as you seem to. I also can't grow much of a beard but understand this is...

Try to stop checking up on her. What's the point? It's easy to assume that everything she is posting is about you but it just as easily could not be and even if it was it doesn't matter anymore. At some point you'll see something that sets you back.

Keep going dude. I've been exactly where you are and still am to an extent, even down to beating myself up about not appreciating her enough. Do you really want to be her back-up option? Because if she comes back (and she likely will in some form if you stay no contact), it will only be because...

I believe the advice you gave to me in my thread after I had replied amicably ONCE to my (bpd) ex after she contacted me after 7 months of NC - and only to help give myself closure - included: "What is wrong with you? Why would you ever let a woman know she had that power over you?" "I don't...

This. 4 months is not a long time to be out of a relationship like this. You likely still have strong feelings for her and I bet a small part of you still thinks that she could be the one and that her bahavioir wasn't that bad (I still often have these doubtful thoughts about mine). My ex...

Sounds like it's imperative that you do keep your existing social dynamic as this is what makes the job enjoyable for you. Why should you change this for a new hire at a secretary level, regardless of gender? Unless you are joking about rape, degrading women or cracking jokes at her expense...

Mate you well may be right with your sentiment but it does not help people in this situation. You obviously haven't been in a similar situation with one of these girls. Yes, he needs to move on, he probably knows this, but you saying oh man just move on and work out and become better does...

If you don't get out now and immediately seek some kind of support for the emotional devastation you are likely going through, it sounds like you are at risk of killing yourself. It sounds as if you are financially struggling too which I'd imagine would magnify things. You know she is seeing...

Doesn't matter, man. She won't regain attraction, at least not in any consistent way. Over time, it will probably only decrease more. She might come back one day, but she won't be the girl you knew; she likely won't ever feel the same about you again. I know it sucks but it's reality. She'll be...

This is all bang-on and really good advice. Doing what is described above is going to be difficult to do and will probably go against your instincts or how you feel you should act, but it's absolutely the right thing(s) to do.

This is a fantastic post. It's all very well for the guys up top to give the whole man-up, join the gym and move on speech, and though it's effective in its own way, it doesn't help long term when someone is feeling like this, at least in my experience anyway. I think it's better for the OP...

A little harsh but fair. My sense of self worth did leave when she did (and for longer than it should have) and I admit that. It's coming back though and it's due to nothing else but working on my flaws and not relying on other people. I never said that the couple of texts I'd received was...

I handled this so badly because I had tied my sense of self worth, ego and self esteem to this girl over a number of years. We kept getting caught up in it again, long after it should have been laid to rest. I didn't even notice it was happening. I'm sure trauma bonding also plays a part and a...