Im still seeing a girl (fwb/plate) for 8 months now. I wrote a thread about her months ago. We started dating, hooking up but it turned into a fwb. I didn't put in the effort to date her properly the first months and she became distant and fed up. I feel like she doesnt see me as bf potential anymore.
I made some mistakes, by telling her a thing or two about my past which resulted in her not seeing me as bf potential. We don't go out on dates ever, we only visit eachother houses and hook up. (I tried to date her again, do something fun but then she tells me shes busy or some excuse, she only wants cex imo) So she reaches out most of the time when shes lonely and horney in the evening. We tried to talk a couple of times to solve things and she also tried to end it with me for a couple of times! I started texting her twice and the other 8 times she always dm'ed me again after saying that its better that we dont see eachother anymore. Anyhow I say, okay no problem then she says, but I miss you... and I go fvck her.
So 8 months straight weekly hooking up. When she becomes distant or complains about her feelings, I just listen to her (open her up) then I dont chase and then she keeps coming back, the cex is a 10. We also have a lot of fun, we argue almost never. I think the cex and attraction we really have (sky high) is what is keeping us going back.
Anyhow, I just don't want to fvck her when she is fvcking someone else, it's disgusts me, then Id rather quit, but shes only a plate/fwb.
I went through her phone last week (told her im just scrolling through her pictures) and didn't see something weird. I know this come off as insecure but I don't care, I just act like im checking her pictures. I had my jacket at her place so I texted her yesterday and she told me she was home later so I told her I come by to see her and get my jacket also.
She told me last week that her (girl)friend will sleep at her place (friday), my buddy saw her downtown with her (girl)friend so thats true. She told me she made her breakfast on her bed, and that they slept together which she does with her friend. Okay.. I just have a weird gut feeling, idk.
Ofc, things escalate, we end up in bed, we have cex yesterday. But she is a little distant, not as normal and she feels guilty that she can't be her ''normal self'' today.
Next morning she goes shower and I go through her phone (she knows it, just saying Im scrolling true her pictures) but she says ''I know your checking my dms, and messages''. Ok I dont care, I want no std's and it disgusts me to lick her when shes hooking up with other guys.
I read message from the girl she was with friday (her best friend).
Texting went something like this:
Girlfriend: ''hey we had fun yesterday''
myplate: ''yeah so much funnn''
myplate: ''that guy was so wow *shy emoticon
Girlfiend: ''good, did he text you already??''
myplate: ''No... I can't wait until he texts me....I literally can't''
Girlfriend: ''Hopefully he texts you''
myplate: ''Yes....not yet''
myplate: ''Oh btw, Guyo (probably other dude from past or so) added me in Instagram, o my god..'' (It looked like she didnt like this guy though''.
Girlfriend: ''ohh good that he did that!''
Checked her IG and he added her yesterday but she didnt accept his offer to follow her. I don't know this dude either.
Thats friday. Didn't see a text from a guy or phone calls though.
Ok, she told me she drunk, she told me her friend slept at her house, she told me she was home at 5, she told me she was in the street after the bar closed for an hour. It could be that a guy number closed her, made out with her or worse she lies and he fvcked her and didn't text yet.
For me, well yes obv, I write this thread so I care. But, I dont know how to go about it because if she really fvked him, I just want to end it, done, it just disgusts me
I didn't confront her in the house, didn't feel like it. But! She opened the text with her girlfriend in front of me when we were laying in bed, then went shower. I ask for her phone codes and she gives it and let me scroll through her phone for 20 minutes straight. Shes a woman, she probably knows that I would read that message about that ''wow guy''. Would she be that stupid that she forgot about that convo? I just doubt it myself. Would she hope that I read that message so she gets an emotional reaction. Or she never thought about that message at all. who knows
anyhow
options
1. meet up, confront her, tell her I read the messages, let her talk up and end the casual cex on a very polite indifferent way
2. say nothing go complete silent and act as nothing happened if she texts(can't really do that) I feel as if that guy doesn't text her and theres no other better option, she will text me when shes lonely again maybe next week or even earlier.
3. soft next, never text her and act busy (I dont like this style but I feel this is the best way to go about it)
She was affectionate, kissing, hugging the whole time, we had good cex but something was off