escorts vs civvies

[AmsterdamAssassin]

However, with how sparingly I'm able to secure a non-escort lay (and with how much work I have to put in to secure a non-escort lay), I've come to the conclusion that it makes more sense for me to utilize escorts (Which isn't to say I'm totally uninterested in non-escorts).

I understand how some men might use prostitutes as a 'patch' to solve a sexless situation, but you cannot have true intimacy with someone you pay for sex, so I hope that eventually you will have an easier time finding women to be intimate with.

As for legality, I prefer having prostitution outlawed. Keeps the prices down (and with a little common sense, you can easily avoid stings)

One of the main reasons of the Dutch legalisation of prostitution is that it's easier to concentrate on the 'bad prostitution' where hapless girls are trafficked under the guise of 'working au pair' and ending up forced in working in illegal brothels.
With the large part of voluntary prostitutes out in the open, it's easier to find the involuntary ones.
Another thing is that the legal prostitutes get medically checked for STDs, they only work with condoms, and they have protection from the law instead of some violent pimp.
The Amsterdam Red Light District has hundreds of police cameras and police patrols, so it's one of the safest areas in the city.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

As corrector pointed out, referring to non-escort women as simply "women," ends up denying the womanhood of escorts. An escort is a woman too.

That’s irrelevant. A woman is by default not a wh*re. Just like I am, by default a normal heterosexual man with a pen/s. I am not a Cis- I am a man. non-wh*re women are not ‘civies’. They are women. Save that Civiie stuff for Hooker boards.

 

[pipeman84]

but you cannot have true intimacy with someone you pay for sex

For true intimacy there has to be true love, a deep connection on several levels and enough time in the relationship for those to develop and grow. Most guys who pay for sex are just looking to unload and they know it, but I bet there are quite a few who actually believe they have true intimacy with a plate.

 

[Aspire]

If you're familiar with me, chances are you're aware that, while I have banged civvies, I mainly utilize escorts (Other than a one-and-done from 2021, the last time I banged a civvie was 2015).

I compiled an explanation of why (from my perspective at least) escorts are better than civvies:


There are so many complicated rules to follow when trying to get sex from a woman, even if the woman appears to be into you.

If you come on too strong, she’ll change her mind about giving you sex (because you come across as desperate).

Then on the flipside, if you don’t come on strong enough, she’ll also change her mind about giving you sex (because she’ll think you’re not interested, she’ll think you haven’t done enough to prove yourself “worthy,” etc).

If you say or do the “wrong” thing, even once, she’ll change her mind about giving you sex.

It’s extremely difficult to find the precise balance a woman wants. I (along with a lot of guys) have come to the realization it’s more logical to go the escort route. With escorts, you don’t have to worry about the tentative intercourse getting revoked over a slight misstep. Nor do you have to wonder if you’ll get sex; you know for a fact you’ll get sex with the escort.

What are your thoughts?

Sorry I have to ask : what is a Civvy? I don’t know that term.

 

[corrector]

That’s irrelevant. A woman is by default not a wh*re. Just like I am, by default a normal heterosexual man with a pen/s. I am not a Cis- I am a man. non-wh*re women are not ‘civies’. They are women. Save that Civiie stuff for Hooker boards.

So you are strongly implying that an escort by default is not a woman. What are they then? Gray aliens? Your anology to cis also suggests that you are talking about biology rather than behavior. You are in essence saying an escort is not biologically a woman.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

So you are strongly implying that an escort by default is not a woman. What are they then? Gray aliens? Your anology to cis also suggests that you are talking about biology rather than behavior. You are in essence saying an escort is not biologically a woman.

No. 99+% of women are not prostitutes. Thus. One assumes, rightfully, that a woman is not a prostitute. And can just be referred to as a ‘woman’. It needs no other description. That tiny fraction of women who are prostitutes, should be identified as such. And. unless this is a gay site, it can be assumed prostitutes are women. As likely, the vast majority of prostitutes are women. Now. If this were an Escort site. Perhaps Escort & Civies might be appropriate. Easist thing would be to have Escort discussions in Anything Else.

 

[Captain Redbeard]

Referring to someone by their profession does not de-humanize them. I can call someone a lawyer and that does not mean he is not a human (although some may debate this fact hahaha)... the same should be true for sex workers. Since the main women of interest on this board are non-pros we don't need a special term to differentiate them as such. I'm confused why this debate continues
woman - we will assume not a sex worker unless told otherwise
sex worker - we will assume woman unless told otherwise

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Referring to someone by their profession does not de-humanize them. I can call someone a lawyer and that does not mean he is not a human (although some may debate this fact hahaha)... the same should be true for sex workers. Since the main women of interest on this board are non-pros we don't need a special term to differentiate them as such. I'm confused why this debate continues
woman - we will assume not a sex worker unless told otherwise
sex worker - we will assume woman unless told otherwise

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Sorry you’re trying to use moral equivalence and it does not work. A sex worker is a sex worker and not the norm.

As corrector pointed out, referring to non-escort women as simply "women," ends up denying the womanhood of escorts. An escort is a woman too.

 

[Bingo-Player]

The debate has gone on since the beginning of time

who needs / wants sex more men or women ?

Well at some stage in history that debate was firmly settled when men happily started using money and gifts to lure women into sexual favours

Sex work has been around since medieval times and it hasn't really stopped since but 99% of the time its men propositioning women and not the other way around

Of course this is going to leak into ordinary dynamics between men and women

Part of a female dating strategy has always been too try and extract as much "value" out of a man before opening her legs

( this is probably largely where the "3 date rule" originated from ) but because of testosterone .
Men WANT sex a lot more than women do, the power dynamic affords a lot of females the luxury of being very selective over whom they will have sex with and often women want the best they can get

Where as most men will generally have sex with almost anyone in a short skirt and high heels

Men being men want a quick and easy solution and that solution is pay to play

Personally I have always enjoyed the thrill of the hunt more than the actual sex , using your skills and experience to get a woman to sexually submit to you and please you is always going to be a lot more rewarding than simply handing over a fistful of cash and going at it

Plus if you actually like her you can then develop a bond and gain a companion out of it

This isn't possible with pay to play but each to their own.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Most guys who pay for sex are just looking to unload and they know it, but I bet there are quite a few who actually believe they have true intimacy with a plate.

I don't have 'plates', I do have kittens and what we share is true intimacy. They make love to me because they want and enjoy being intimate with me, not because there is a financial compensation.

I believe sex only costs money if you suck at it.

 

[corrector]

Sorry you’re trying to use moral equivalence and it does not work. A sex worker is a sex worker and not the norm.

Lets say you make a contrast to a drunken ONS who forgets your name and does not know you from Adam the next day compared to going with an escort. Will you be using that for your case study in disputing moral equivalency?

The main issue I had against seeing an escort was that it was with a stranger and she was doing that with everyone. The money was seen more of the cost of convenience.

Comparing escorts to girl next door Stacies with a low body count is not exactly fair for this discussion. Once a woman has a high body count and loses the ability to pair bond, has sex tapes circulating around the net, then yeah, it does start sounding "morally equivalent".

 

[corrector]

Notice how its only chad posters taking issue to this. Must be a blow to the ego that a nornie or sub 5 can have access to the same level of hot girls they do by having a wad of cash, lol!

For example, @characternote, @SW15, @sangheilios should step up to the plate and contribute to this discussion.

 

[corrector]

Now I will have a problem to fapping with escort women. Part of the allure of enjoying escort ads are that they are actually pics of real women. To maintain the suspension of disbelief this is necessary.

Or perhaps, the only reason I can fap to them is because they are not normal woman but like cvm dumpsters. Normal women have a different fap aspect, I cant do that without getting jockjaw. Like someone is punching me for taking advantage of a woman in my mind. However with escorts the fapping feels allot easier, just like using the washroom rather than a conquest. Perhaps they register as different after all.

 

[corrector]

If you have daily (or even weekly) sex, yeah.

Having sex with an escort twice a month, however (which is how often a lot of married couples do it), is probably cheaper than a wife

Is your escort encounters like using a human washroom for your sexual cravings or does it feel deeper than that? @SW15 tries to paint a picture of sex as a need. I mean you cant really feel like its a conquest in the same manner as a civvie who wants you to go inside of her?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Notice how its only chad posters taking issue to this. Must be a blow to the ego that a nornie or sub 5 can have access to the same level of hot girls they do by having a wad of cash, lol!

That's hilarious.

Lets say you make a contrast to a drunken ONS who forgets your name and does not know you from Adam the next day compared to going with an escort. Will you be using that for your case study in disputing moral equivalency?

Let's say that a man doesn't fvck drunk women who are likely to forget his name. None of the women I had sex with treated sex like a commodity. Only sex workers do so. So comparing a regular woman to a prostitute is misogynistic.

The problem with wh0remongers is that they only want to use a woman for self-gratification and most women have too much self-esteem to become cvm dumpsters. And now you want to compare a cvm dumpster with regular women?

And we're the misogynist ones because we make a distinctions between normal women and women who treat sex as a commodity?

 

[GoodMan32]

I understand how some men might use prostitutes as a 'patch' to solve a sexless situation, but you cannot have true intimacy with someone you pay for sex, so I hope that eventually you will have an easier time finding women to be intimate with.


One of the main reasons of the Dutch legalisation of prostitution is that it's easier to concentrate on the 'bad prostitution' where hapless girls are trafficked under the guise of 'working au pair' and ending up forced in working in illegal brothels.
With the large part of voluntary prostitutes out in the open, it's easier to find the involuntary ones.
Another thing is that the legal prostitutes get medically checked for STDs, they only work with condoms, and they have protection from the law instead of some violent pimp.
The Amsterdam Red Light District has hundreds of police cameras and police patrols, so it's one of the safest areas in the city.

I'm aware you can never have true intimacy with a woman you pay for sex.

I'm skeptical of whether you can have true intimacy with an unpaid one night stand either. Even before I discovered escorts, I never had any repeat sessions with any unpaid woman. And there wasn't a whole lot of intimacy. Aren't a lot of men on here looking for unpaid one night stands?

The woman I had perhaps the most intimacy with was this married woman I banged 6 times (I met her shortly after I first started utilizing escorts. She enabled me to take a break from escorts for a bit).

 

[GoodMan32]

Sorry I have to ask : what is a Civvy? I don’t know that term.

It's what some guys call a woman who doesn't charge you for sex.

 

[SW15]

Aren't a lot of men on here looking for unpaid one night stands?

A lot of men into seduction are looking for unpaid directly one night stands. Men who obtain one night stands conventionally do pay for sex indirectly.

 

[GoodMan32]

Sorry you’re trying to use moral equivalence and it does not work. A sex worker is a sex worker and not the norm.

The vast majority of men aren't garbage collectors. But still, wouldn't it be insulting/dehumanizing to refer to garbage collectors as garbage collectors, but refer to the rest of us as men?

(I picked garbage collectors for the analogy because that's a profession that's stigmatized and overwhelmingly male)