escorts vs civvies

[GoodMan32]

I don't have 'plates', I do have kittens and what we share is true intimacy. They make love to me because they want and enjoy being intimate with me, not because there is a financial compensation.

I believe sex only costs money if you suck at it.

As for your claim "Sex only costs money if you suck at it," what about guys like me who, thanks to being on the spectrum, are unlikely to even get a chance to show an unpaid woman whether we're good at sex?

 

[pipeman84]

I had sex with half the MILFs in my kids' primary school.

Most of them are bored and if they know you're discreet, they come over after lunch when the kids go back to school for some 'afternoon delight'. And since most of them have a partner/husband, you don't have to 'date' them. They prefer to come over to my house, where they can pretend to 'drink coffee' with me. No subterfuge needed.

I don't have 'plates', I do have kittens and what we share is true intimacy. They make love to me because they want and enjoy being intimate with me, not because there is a financial compensation.

I believe sex only costs money if you suck at it.

You have sex with mothers, behind their husbands backs. Yet you somehow believe that's true intimacy and that activity is of a higher moral standard and more masculine than paying for sex. Hm...

 

[GoodMan32]

Is your escort encounters like using a human washroom for your sexual cravings or does it feel deeper than that? @SW15 tries to paint a picture of sex as a need. I mean you cant really feel like its a conquest in the same manner as a civvie who wants you to go inside of her?

You're right, sex with an escort doesn't feel like a conquest at all.

To answer your other question (of whether escort sex feels like using a public bathroom), it depends on the escort. If it's an escort I'm seeing for the first time, sometimes I end up not vibing with her (so I never contact her again). In these instances, sex feels like using a public bathroom.

There's this one escort who texts with me outside of "work." This weekend, for example, she reached out to me to ask about my Thanksgiving. Even though I'm fully aware she only bangs me for money, the sex with her doesn't feel as impersonal.

Then there are also escorts who fall somewhere between the 2 extremes I just mentioned.

One last thing I will say: In college, there was this woman I met on a hookup website who ended up starfishing during sex. Even though the sex with her was 100% free, it felt pretty impersonal.

 

[GoodMan32]

A lot of men into seduction are looking for unpaid directly one night stands. Men who obtain one night stands conventionally do pay for sex indirectly.

My point still stands. There's not much intimacy in a one night stand.

So I don't get why some men make it sound like even a one night stand has a lot more intimacy than escort sex.

 

[GoodMan32]

Waste disposal is a valuable contribution to society. Check out what happened when they went on strike in NYC and the rats walked the streets filled with garbage.

If the pandemic showed one thing quite clearly, it's that the 'ordinary workers' were much more needed to keep society running than the 'elite'. So, looking down on garbage collectors is actually pretty stupid. Watch what happens when they don't collect the garbage.

Your example only shows that YOU look down on garbage collectors, but most people do not look down on them. They understand the necessity of their function in society.

Right, I'm fully aware garbage collectors are useful. I personally don't look down upon garbage collectors.

Escorts are useful too; there's a reason prostitution is the world's oldest profession.

 

[corrector]

Lets say that a man doesn't fvck drunk women who are likely to forget his name.

We are talking about desperate guys who can't get laid with hot women and are either sub-5s or normies are on the spectrum of have a low tolerance for the games and bs women play. If they want to get laid and are really desperate then what options do they have. It sounds like it's fair to use that as we are not talking about chad-lite or chad (or tyrone/chadrone, whatever) tier guys who have abundance and no issues attracting women in the first place. Trying to super-impose chad-tier reality does a disservice to a discussion like this as the intention of a chad-tier guy using a prostitute would sound allot darker than say an sub-5/normie type of guy using it.

None of the women I had sex with treated sex like a commodity. Only sex workers do so. So comparing a regular woman to a prostitute is misogynistic.

Again, you are coming at this from a chad-tier angle. Lets take @SW15 assertions for the sake of argument (ie despite the fact I don't generally agree with him or are on the same page with him), that sex is a human need. Would you say it's wrong to charge people for urinating or using a washroom if they needed to use it, or charge people for oxygen? I would think that it's wrong. However, if people need to use it, then you can't fault them from spending money that way. Same thing with sex. You don't have that scenario because you have an abundance of woman and are used to women liking some aspect of you. In that context, if you used a prostitute, then it would sound more sinister and darker, than say if a sub-5/incel did. In that case, it would be the guy that's being expoited financially for something that he needs but can not get.

The problem with wh0remongers is that they only want to use a woman for self-gratification and most women have too much self-esteem to become cvm dumpsters. And now you want to compare a cvm dumpster with regular women?

If the wh0remonger is a chad-tier guy then agreed. If it's an sub-5/normie type of guy then it depends on the issue as to whether sex is a need or not. I don't personally believe that it is, but it doesn't mean that there are not others on here who do and I have the right to exploit their arguments even if I don't agree with that. If you believe that sex is a human need then at some level your line of logic would be self-serving or hypocritical.

 

[corrector]

In these instances, sex feels like using a public bathroom.

Exactly, that's why it's easy to fap on their ads. Sometimes you just need a release or your head gets all claustrophobic.

 

[GoodMan32]

You have sex with mothers, behind their husbands backs. Yet you somehow believe that's true intimacy and that activity is of a higher moral standard and more masculine than paying for sex. Hm...

Even though you weren't talking to me, I'm going to chime in.

I mentioned on another post that the most intimacy I've ever had in the bedroom was with a married woman who was cheating on her husband with me (it just so happens she had a 6 and 8 year old too). So she was going behind the backs of her husband and her kids.

Her husband hadn't banged her in 2 and a half years. She was immensely grateful for the fact a younger guy with good looks was giving her what her husband wouldn't.

 

[GoodMan32]

Life is unfair. Suck it up.

Going the escort route is my version of sucking it up. If I'm going to fail the vast majority of the time when trying to get free sex, a man can only take so much humiliation.

That being said, I'm also down to learn shortcuts to get sex with an unpaid woman (which is one of the reasons I'm on here).

Another problem of mine: I'm basically illiterate at picking up on clues a woman wants me to make a move on her. There have probably been times a woman wanted me to come onto her, yet I did nothing (because I wasn't aware she wanted me to come onto her). I'd like to learn how to pick up on foolproof clues a woman wants me to come onto her.

 

[corrector]

Indeed. I don't believe sex is a human need.

Food. Water. Shelter. Those are needs. You cannot live without food, water, shelter.

Sex is not a necessity.

Right, and also oxygen (ie assuming you hypothetically lived on Mars). Anyway, I still had to throw that wrench into the argument even if we are in agreement here. By going there with your reply then it seems like you want to end the argument with me. Based on our post history and attention of the mods I don't blame you.

It's up to @SW15 / others to take up the mantle as they are the ones on here who believe its a need if this discussion/arguement is extended further.

 

[Bingo-Player]

For young men, I totally agree men want sex a lot more.

Once a man is in his 30s (like me), this changes. I'm not nearly as horny as I used to be (other men in their 30s and above have told me the same).

A woman's sex drive, on the other hand, supposedly increases once she reaches 30.

That being said, even a 30+ year old man might appear hornier than his female peers. For one simple reason: For a man, sex is sex. We climax during the vast majority of sex sessions. All we need is a slot to park our sausage. A woman, on the other hand, is less likely to reach climax from sex. So even though a woman might want sex more badly than we do, she's not going to pick just anyone. She wants a man who's going to satisfy her.

As for your assertion that you like the hunt more than the sex itself, I respect that stance. I've heard other men say the same. For me, however, being on the spectrum, the hunt leads to frustrations/mess-ups the vast majority of the time. So as rewarding as it is for a woman to submit to me sexually without payment, I hate the hunt with a burning passion.

I'm 31 I don't think I have ever been as horny as I have been for the last 2/3 years

Usually when I do get a chick in bed these days we will have sex maybe 4 or 5 times over the course of an evening this would never happen when I was younger I just couldn't be bothered

I remember In the summer a girl I was casually seeing came over at like 2pm in the afternoon we were supposed to be going hiking

She arrived walked in my house and within 15 mins I had her naked and was fvcking her we went hiking afterwards came home and I wanted to fvck her again so I did

Porn has definitely made me hornier for better or worse

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With regards to the hunt yea I mean from start to finish its A LOT OF WORK

and yea a lot of guys fvck it up easily , I don't even want to know how many girls ive fvcked it up with in my time by saying something out of turn or something thats been misconstrued or not pulling the trigger at the right time

But I think that makes it even more rewarding when you are in the right place at the right time and you do the right things

You miss out on a lot of experiences by just paying for it ( although I can see the quick win )

 

[GoodMan32]

I'm 31 I don't think I have ever been as horny as I have been for the last 2/3 years

Usually when I do get a chick in bed these days we will have sex maybe 4 or 5 times over the course of an evening this would never happen when I was younger I just couldn't be bothered

I remember In the summer a girl I was casually seeing came over at like 2pm in the afternoon we were supposed to be going hiking

She arrived walked in my house and within 15 mins I had her naked and was fvcking her we went hiking afterwards came home and I wanted to fvck her again so I did

Porn has definitely made me hornier for better or worse

-------------------------------------------------------------

With regards to the hunt yea I mean from start to finish its A LOT OF WORK

and yea a lot of guys fvck it up easily , I don't even want to know how many girls ive fvcked it up with in my time by saying something out of turn or something thats been misconstrued or not pulling the trigger at the right time

But I think that makes it even more rewarding when you are in the right place at the right time and you do the right things

You miss out on a lot of experiences by just paying for it ( although I can see the quick win )

Interesting; I'm the total opposite. In my younger days, I had no trouble doing multiple bangs in one session. Yet I remember a time when I was 27 and couldn't even get hard for round 2 (that was the first sign I was slowing down)

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Feeling nauseated after fapping to escort ads.

TMI

 

[Hamurabimbi]

The debate has gone on since the beginning of time

who needs / wants sex more men or women ?

Well at some stage in history that debate was firmly settled when men happily started using money and gifts to lure women into sexual favours

Sex work has been around since medieval times and it hasn't really stopped since but 99% of the time its men propositioning women and not the other way around

Of course this is going to leak into ordinary dynamics between men and women

Part of a female dating strategy has always been too try and extract as much "value" out of a man before opening her legs

( this is probably largely where the "3 date rule" originated from ) but because of testosterone .
Men WANT sex a lot more than women do, the power dynamic affords a lot of females the luxury of being very selective over whom they will have sex with and often women want the best they can get

Where as most men will generally have sex with almost anyone in a short skirt and high heels

Men being men want a quick and easy solution and that solution is pay to play

Personally I have always enjoyed the thrill of the hunt more than the actual sex , using your skills and experience to get a woman to sexually submit to you and please you is always going to be a lot more rewarding than simply handing over a fistful of cash and going at it

Plus if you actually like her you can then develop a bond and gain a companion out of it

This isn't possible with pay to play but each to their own.

sex work has been around since Biblical times.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

TMI

I know you're working now and mostly enjoying being good at it. I also assume it provides health insurance. A couple of questions:

1. When was the last time you did a physical?
2. Does it have wellness coverage? (do they provide coverage to talk to a counselor?)

I guess it would be good for you to explore them and positively affect moving the pieces forward on the board.

You're an earnest and mostly honest guy; you often bear your heart out to us and hear wildly divergent responses from all of us from time to time (and the collective WE have our issues). Good therapists would likely be a better option than this forum; at least the message will be consistent. I'd suggest a male, not a female.

Knowing where your physical health is right now would be a good thing as well, as you age there are things that can contribute to your wellness that you may not know are an issue.

 

[corrector]

sex work has been around since Biblical times.

It is discouraged though. Women didn't have any rights like they have today. Often if a woman was divorced or not married, then she'd be subject to a life of poverty. They didn't have the conveniences of modern society, like welfare, women having the same or better jobs as guys, and were often viewed as property. In this context, women would have to do sex work just to eat to survive because she needed a husband to survive (ie despite this, of course, not all women did this)

In Western society, I don't feel there is justification like that for women to do that like in Biblical times. I do get there are other "issues" and spiritual forces that can make people do sick things or make bad decisions in terms of lifestyle. However, like you said most of these types of women don't do sex work and manage to survive without going there.

 

[corrector]

I know you're working now and mostly enjoying being good at it. I also assume it provides health insurance. A couple of questions:

1. When was the last time you did a physical?
2. Does it have wellness coverage? (do they provide coverage to talk to a counselor?)

I guess it would be good for you to explore them and positively affect moving the pieces forward on the board.

You're an earnest and mostly honest guy; you often bear your heart out to us and hear wildly divergent responses from all of us from time to time (and the collective WE have our issues). Good therapists would likely be a better option than this forum; at least the message will be consistent. I'd suggest a male, not a female.

Knowing where your physical health is right now would be a good thing as well, as you age there are things that can contribute to your wellness that you may not know are an issue.

If everything is focused on "escorts/prostitutes" then it can be quarantined. How I may or may not feel about escorts or past interactions with them over 9 years ago, has no effect on the rest of myself. In fact, you only see this type of expression when the topic of escorts are brought up. Don't even reply much to any other type of thread at all or make any threads. It's only one or two posters making these types of threads.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

For young men, I totally agree men want sex a lot more.

Once a man is in his 30s (like me), this changes. I'm not nearly as horny as I used to be (other men in their 30s and above have told me the same).

A woman's sex drive, on the other hand, supposedly increases once she reaches 30.

That being said, even a 30+ year old man might appear hornier than his female peers. For one simple reason: For a man, sex is sex. We climax during the vast majority of sex sessions. All we need is a slot to park our sausage. A woman, on the other hand, is less likely to reach climax from sex. So even though a woman might want sex more badly than we do, she's not going to pick just anyone. She wants a man who's going to satisfy her.

As for your assertion that you like the hunt more than the sex itself, I respect that stance. I've heard other men say the same. For me, however, being on the spectrum, the hunt leads to frustrations/mess-ups the vast majority of the time. So as rewarding as it is for a woman to submit to me sexually without payment, I hate the hunt with a burning passion.

I'm in my 50s, and while I have always had a very high libido, I am more randy now than I ever have been in my life. As a few here have described it in the past, I am one of those "sexual athletes"; I enjoy women like pretty much nothing else in the world. I can easily dedicate several hours a day to sex because my chosen occupation allows me to do so. Like I was explaining to one of my birds last night, who is particularly well endowed in the chest department after she noted (as I was paying with her mammaries) "Have you always been a boobs guy?" my answer was, "In this case, I totally am because they're beautiful and kind of out there, but in general women are born with physiques that are congruent - I've been with partners who were a-cups, and I still found them wildly attractive."

She was amazed and pleased by my answer. Her response was, "You really love women, don't you?" with a great big smile on her face, to which I replied, "Categorically". Her answer: "Yes, and it shows. I get to be the beneficiary of it thank you."

p.s. I know some here will rile against what I've written: don't pedestalize. Aren't there more important things? That's pathetic, I don't care if a woman orgasms or not, no way anyone can have sex for hours or come several times a day...spare me the vitriol.

Just because it is not your experience does not mean it is not the case.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

The vast majority of men aren't garbage collectors. But still, wouldn't it be insulting/dehumanizing to refer to garbage collectors as garbage collectors, but refer to the rest of us as men?

(I picked garbage collectors for the analogy because that's a profession that's stigmatized and overwhelmingly male)

most people aren’t soldiers. Is is insulting to refer to a person as a ‘soldier’?

The vast majority of men aren't garbage collectors. But still, wouldn't it be insulting/dehumanizing to refer to garbage collectors as garbage collectors, but refer to the rest of us as men?

(I picked garbage collectors for the analogy because that's a profession that's stigmatized and overwhelmingly male)

They are referred to as sanitation engineers’.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

It is discouraged though. Women didn't have any rights like they have today. Often if a woman was divorced or not married, then she'd be subject to a life of poverty. They didn't have the conveniences of modern society, like welfare, women having the same or better jobs as guys, and were often viewed as property. In this context, women would have to do sex work just to eat to survive because she needed a husband to survive (ie despite this, of course, not all women did this)

In Western society, I don't feel there is justification like that for women to do that like in Biblical times. I do get there are other "issues" and spiritual forces that can make people do sick things or make bad decisions in terms of lifestyle. However, like you said most of these types of women don't do sex work and manage to survive without going there.

Prostitutes were always looked down upon.