What the blackpill gets wrong. Hypergamy isnt as bad as we think.

[Gamisch]

I see gray area. It can be learned to some degree.



The field is tough. All seducers need to go out in the field and approach. The problem is all the rejections, failed interactions, etc. They can be traumatic and psychologically devastating. The hope is that the person can make it through getting sent to the reject pile repeatedly without sustaining major damage.



Co-ed sports leagues can be considered a form of weak social circle game. It’s pretty difficult to swoop into a co-ed kickball, softball, volleyball, or soccer league & directly arrange dates. First, there are more men than women in all these leagues. Nearly every other guy in these leagues is an unattached guy who is trying to get his penis wet in league because he read some advice article online or in a printed copy of a magazine about doing this. The only exceptions are the men who join teams with their girlfriends or wives. You can make friends in these leagues but chances are that the other men need sex as much as you do. If you’re able to develop a social circle from a co-ed sports league, realize it will take multiple seasons of participation in the league. So you’d better actually like that sport because playing that sport is often the only benefit of it.

I agree, rejections can be devastating. But a decade long lasting dry spell is also devastating for a man. It's all within the mind. But you gotta get up and do something A rejection should be a fun conversation with "just" a negative conclusion. I Just got rejected by a girl getting some groceries.

The sport thing is maybe not about direct results , but more about increasing your social game. Now you have 5more forms with 5 more sisters, neighbors, colleagues ect. You get out the house more often. Maybe there are 1 or 2 like minded people who wanna go out with you. Best case scenario is there are women , but it should NOT be about fast results with women. It's just another brick of your awesome castle.

I approached a cashier when I was checking out some items. She didn't give me any IOIs and was just business.

Well that's a great start. And you still alive I see. Just keep doing approaches. That's the great thing about being a man; society kinda expects you to chase women...no shame in that.

 

[Gamisch]

It's the rarest, and the most Aryan of features. The whitest of the white lol. White people are already considered the epitome of beauty, and the scarcity and rarity of blonde and blue is the most sought after.

That's literally it. If I get no signs or hints that a woman is interested...why take a shot in the dark? Clearly I know she isn't, so it's a waste of time. As someone that's naturally introverted, I can't approach with no goodwill, and I don't get any...which is a direct sign women aren't interested, so I shouldn't approach.

I'm black and both of my parents are black, but I look mixed. (not black/white mixed, but black/latin/pacific islander/Samoan) I've gotten comparisons to Lenny Kravitz a ton, but also Russell Wilson. That doesn't matter because my personality and disposition are too weird and alternative. I'm in no way the "thug/confident" stereotype, but I'm also not a cornball/coon, self-loather who obsesses over white girls and Asians. To be honest, I come off as a pretentious, haughty, gothy poet, and unless you're white, women aren't exactly clamoring for that.

Tbh, unlike 98% of this board, I don't care for Asian women(unless they're mixed with white) but I know for sure I'd receive a ton of attention from them and Latinas if I was white, since I'm already 6'3, very learn and I dress really well. If I was white and I could just walk into a club or bar and pick up women like ordering ice cream at a parlor, my cache would be European women, mixed black girls and Colombians.

Right. You look like this but you dont get ioi? Haha c'mon now dude. Maybe it's your ATTITUDE that's needs work?

Can you drop the race thing now please and make it about yourself? It's getting extremely annoying now . We know now, you feel like white people have more changes.

 

[corrector]

Right. You look like this but you dont get ioi? Haha c'mon now dude. Maybe it's your ATTITUDE that's needs work?

Can you drop the race thing now please and make it about yourself? It's getting extremely annoying now . We know now, you feel like white people have more changes.

You are missing his point though. What he is saying is what he is into and his personality is more congruent with a goth white person than someone who looks like that. It's like Carlton Banks. Women who are into these type of guys may expect some street-smart thuggish type of guy that's really into black culture and if you don't fit all the check-marks it's off putting to them. Has nothing to do with attitude.

There was this movie out called Aliens:Covenant, and the android Bishop (played by Michael Fassbender) had one persona where he was this uptight shy nerdy robot, and this other persona where he was a free-spirited guy that looked like he just got laid. If the persona is not congruent with the body and type of women who would be attracted to that body then it becomes off-putting.

 

[BeExcellent]

The thread has gotten hi jacked but not really. What we are seeing in the thread are the various excuses various men are deploying to justify their failure.

1. Women are horrible
2. I’m not (fit, handsome, successful charming…whatever adjective) enough
3. The divorce rate is so high as to be inevitable
4. I’m the wrong race
5. The elites are ruining society
6. Millennials and Gen Z have no social skills
7. That idea won’t work for me…..

The above attitudes and belief systems are entirely self defeating. They are an utter DRAG to be around. Not surprisingly women do not want to be around these attitudes & beliefs. This should surprise nobody but some of y’all seem shocked. Nobody wants to be around downer type people, especially women. Yuck. Life is hard enough without having to carry more negativity.

Add some lousy social skills and Bingo! You get results seen in this thread. And some of the more successful men are jaded too because game in the end didn’t save the day.

Guys. Happiness is an inside job. Nowhere do I see any of you guys honestly assessing yourselves or looking hard at where you, personally, are coming up short. If you have happiness and positive energy you cannot help but be attractive.

This thread is like Oscar the Grouch being negative & grouchy in his dirty garbage can. Nobody wants that when they got their own issues and hardships to deal with.

Attitudes and beliefs are everything. Everything. But attitudes and beliefs also often are hiding behind all manner of excuses because to adopt new attitudes and beliefs is to radically reinvent oneself.

That in essence is why I got divorced! My husband became after his business failed, a depressed man who wallowed in woe as me, made excuses for everything (nothing was his fault in his whole life), was lazy and expected me to carry on like normal whole Rome burned. Nope. What. A. Drag.

Nine years later he has not had ANY sex, but he has not changed his situation either. He’s still doing the bare minimum to eek by, drinking, and periodically angry at me about it.

He was an unfit marriage partner but I didn’t know that until AFTER we married. I’ve lost my job a number of times, gotten knocked around by life but I am positive and know I WILL overcome whatever it is. That deep internalized belief drives me forward. I do not sit around and whine about crap I cannot control. I simply empower myself to do whatever it takes to accomplish the goal.

I mean I’m older than most of y’all and not 25 anymore. Yet I have success.

Trust me there are hordes and hordes of negative “Men are Pigs!” man hater women out there too. I’m guessing you guys run into those types. Do you ever run into the positive, uplifting inspiration women? No?

Why is that? Water seeks its own level much?

Fix the self defeating attitudes and fix the poor social skills first. Until those two things change your dating prospects will simply not progress. This should not surprise anyone.

 

[Bigpapa]

View attachment 8641 View attachment 8642

Right. You look like this but you dont get ioi? Haha c'mon now dude. Maybe it's your ATTITUDE that's needs work?

Can you drop the race thing now please and make it about yourself? It's getting extremely annoying now . We know now, you feel like white people have more changes.

man , this guys who you arguing are just trolls

save your bandwidth

 

[BeExcellent]

man , this guys who you arguing are just trolls

save your bandwidth

Agree to a great degree. But they are in denial that the majority of the problems start and end with them. It’s not that these guys don’t want something, they do. But until they become self aware and reflective in an honest manner they will spin around in circles. Thinking it has nothing to do with them.

Manhood 101: Own your own BS.

From there you can begin to sort out your own BS.

 

[corrector]

Nine years later he has not had ANY sex, but he has not changed his situation either.

At least he kept his wedding vows.

 

[thelambofdeth]

How so? If women don't even know what they want, how would you?

Women may not often know what they want, but they usually know what they don't want lol. If I'm occupying the same space as a woman and she doesn't even acknowledge my existence, how can I think anything beyond she not keen?

That's why porn only has blonde people. Nope. Geuss what, different women want different things on different times. Funny you talk about laziness yet you the one to lazy to make a thread about your own issues and seek for solutions.

It's sad you dont allow other men to tel you to MAN TF UP. Women dont need sex as much as we do, so they are not as desperate. The game goes deep and is all about subtleties. You a grown man who doesnt know how to spot ioi. That's like a lion who doesn't know when to attack his prey. Like a lion who waits till his prey is dead but then its already eaten by another predator.

Funny, I ve read more than 20 solutions to your problem in this thread alone. And reading your piece about how women respond? You a troll. A white guy claiming to be black.

That article was indeed the first hit. I can only assume that a deeper search might show a deeper article. But the information is out there.

When was the last time you approached anyway? I'll leave it here. You are trolling and laughing out loud while you have a blonde man bum and changing a diaper, dont you?

Edit: aaah corrector. So 1 example is enough to conclude and predict all other future outcomes now? But the positive ones are not sufficient? I start to get it now.

Again you guys hijacked a thread and made it about race in the process. Nice

Name the most popular male actor, musician, model, or anyone coveted for being attractive...they're all white. That's my point. They have the largest pool of options.

"MaN uP"? What does that even mean? Magically cure my approach anxiety? That's a useless platitude...No chit women aren't desperate, that's exactly why they give subtle hints and indicators. I know what IOIs and choosing signals are...I understand the concept...I.just.don't.get.any.

I know EXACTLY how to spot an IOI. That's part of the frustration. I see other dudes get them...the point is I don't get them. See what I mean about gaslighting??

lol if you don't think that's not how women would respond, you don't know American women, especially the ones that aren't black or white.

The last time I puesdo approached was at a bar...the chick actually asked for my number and seemed super into me until she flaked before a date and I found out she had a BF.

 

[DonJuanjr]

If I'm occupying the same space as a woman and she doesn't even acknowledge my existence, how can I think anything beyond she not keen?

You're putting too much gravity in the act of approaching. You're not looking at it like a game. Who cares if she notices you or not? Go strike up a conversation, and suss out if you spiked her interest/attraction or not. If not, laugh about it (because it's a game) like @DEEZEDBRAH suggests.

 

[Gamisch]

Women may not often know what they want, but they usually know what they don't want lol. If I'm occupying the same space as a woman and she doesn't even acknowledge my existence, how can I think anything beyond she not keen?

Name the most popular male actor, musician, model, or anyone coveted for being attractive...they're all white. That's my point. They have the largest pool of options.

"MaN uP"? What does that even mean? Magically cure my approach anxiety? That's a useless platitude...No chit women aren't desperate, that's exactly why they give subtle hints and indicators. I know what IOIs and choosing signals are...I understand the concept...I.just.don't.get.any.

I know EXACTLY how to spot an IOI. That's part of the frustration. I see other dudes get them...the point is I don't get them. See what I mean about gaslighting??

lol if you don't think that's not how women would respond, you don't know American women, especially the ones that aren't black or white.

The last time I puesdo approached was at a bar...the chick actually asked for my number and seemed super into me until she flaked before a date and I found out she had a BF.

First part would a mind fix. ThEy DoNt EvEn KnOw I eXiSt. Drop that pathetic state of mind. The desperation oozes out of you.

Man up means own your mistakes. Own your flaws . Mike tyson was 1.78 meter fighting giants. He had to work with what God gave him. Man up means get it or die trying. Man up means doing everything possible. (More than look maxxx). Man up means be humble if you dont get what you want and ask for help. I can continue for hours.


And no you DONT know how to spot IOI. I went to a bar recently and my homie told me about women checking me out , I couldn't even remember they were there. Women are subtle with these things, you should know that by now.

when I was younger (and really good looking, pro boxing ect) I used to walk down the streets and try to make eye contact with EVERY woman. If she didn't respond I would take it as a rejection. Foolish me didn't understand that women cant be stopped all day every day. They gotta move on too you know , and with horney predators like me rooming the streets they better protect themselves and look away.

Now I know, I light up every room where I go. I am tall, black ,ripped ,got style , can dance a little and I am somewhat intelligent. I can close the gap. That will ALWAYS get me p00n somewhere. Maybe this is applicable for you as well, but you just dont realize it yet.

 

[corrector]

You're putting too much gravity in the act of approaching. You're not looking at it like a game. Who cares if she notices you or not? Go strike up a conversation, and suss out if you spiked her interest/attraction or not. If not, laugh about it (because it's a game) like @DEEZEDBRAH suggests.

I think the point is not the fact that he's not getting IOIs, but how he is seeing the same women give generous IOIs to white guys that are literally next to him to the point where he's feeling bad. If that happens like next to you and you see a night and day difference in how she is invested in the interaction with the other guy while being a dead fish or strictly business with you, then you are not going to want to deal with her. It's not a game when you feel bad like that.

 

[BeExcellent]

At least he kept his wedding vows.

He did. So did I. I sat out of dating entirely for a full year after the divorce was final. It was sad because he is very likable and cool. He’s a loving father. Just couldn’t deal with the things noted above. He also owns his BS and understands exactly why I left. I gave him many years to address things. He’s not doing anything about it, but he does ‘get it’.

 

[DonJuanjr]

I think the point is not the fact that he's not getting IOIs, but how he is seeing the same women give generous IOIs to white guys that are literally next to him to the point where he's feeling bad. If that happens like next to you and you see a night and day difference in how she is invested in the interaction with the other guy while being a dead fish or strictly business with you, then you are not going to want to deal with her. It's not a game when you feel bad like that.

Being short and bald, I can still sympathize with this. To me, it's still a game. "Oh, she's interested in mr. lushed hair 6'0, I'm gonna try and spike her interest anyways".

 

[corrector]

He did. So did I. I sat out of dating entirely for a full year after the divorce was final. It was sad because he is very likable and cool. He’s a loving father. Just couldn’t deal with the things noted above. He also owns his BS and understands exactly why I left. I gave him many years to address things. He’s not doing anything about it, but he does ‘get it’.

I divorced 8 years ago and haven't got laid either so I've almost kept my wedding vows too.

 

[thelambofdeth]

You're putting too much gravity in the act of approaching. You're not looking at it like a game. Who cares if she notices you or not? Go strike up a conversation, and suss out if you spiked her interest/attraction or not. If not, laugh about it (because it's a game) like @DEEZEDBRAH suggests.

Ummm...try having approach anxiety, being habitually ignored by women and not getting laid for almost two years and tell me if you could equate approaching women to a "game".. If I was some short, fat, really ugly loser who didn't work on himself, or if I couldn't go out and see random, average guys get choosing signs that would be one thing, but neither are true.

First part would a mind fix. ThEy DoNt EvEn KnOw I eXiSt. Drop that pathetic state of mind. The desperation oozes out of you.

Man up means own your mistakes. Own your flaws . Mike tyson was 1.78 meter fighting giants. He had to work with what God gave him. Man up means get it or die trying. Man up means doing everything possible. (More than look maxxx). Man up means be humble if you dont get what you want and ask for help. I can continue for hours.


And no you DONT know how to spot IOI. I went to a bar recently and my homie told me about women checking me out , I couldn't even remember they were there. Women are subtle with these things, you should know that by now.

when I was younger (and really good looking, pro boxing ect) I used to walk down the streets and try to make eye contact with EVERY woman. If she didn't respond I would take it as a rejection. Foolish me didn't understand that women cant be stopped all day every day. They gotta move on too you know , and with horney predators like me rooming the streets they better protect themselves and look away.

Now I know, I light up every room where I go. I am tall, black ,ripped ,got style , can dance a little and I am somewhat intelligent. I can close the gap. That will ALWAYS get me p00n somewhere. Maybe this is applicable for you as well, but you just dont realize it yet.

You're projecting. Just bc you can't detect iois or you dismiss this...that's not indicative of everyone. Yes...WOMEN ARW SUBTLE. But I'm by nature an observant people watcher...the point of and IOIs is that a woman wants your attention, she just isn't going to/doesn't have to approach. The point, she WANTA you to see the choosing sings. If I'm looking for them and don't see them...guess what? It doesn't mean women are being subtle, it means they're looking elesewhere.

Yeah, if that was applicable to me I would've known years ago. Again, you're projecting. I'm sure if I was a good-looking boxer I'd do well with women. I'm not, so I don't. I just don't understand why you lot don't understand what it's like if you're not really attractive. I know this is hard to believe, but that means those who aren't, are treated different by women lol.

 

[DonJuanjr]

Ummm...try having approach anxiety, being habitually ignored by women and not getting laid for almost two years and tell me if you could equate approaching women to a "game".. If I was some short, fat, really ugly loser who didn't work on himself, or if I couldn't go out and see random, average guys get choosing signs that would be one thing, but neither are true.

I was celibate for 12 years. I've been rejected around 45 times in the last year and a half. Approach anxiety becomes greatly reduced(or dies) after x amount of rejections. Keep doing it until it does.

 

[corrector]

I was celibate for 12 years. I've been rejected around 45 times in the last year and a half. Approach anxiety becomes greatly reduced(or dies) after x amount of rejections. Keep doing it until it does.

Yeah but you got a break from using tinder, not by doing approaches. You met the girl from the dating apps.

 

[DonJuanjr]

Yeah but you got a break from using tinder, not by doing approaches. You met the girl from the dating apps.

True. But putting the work in approach put me in a better position to eventually succeed there, because it's not some life or death thing anymore. I did get a date within the first several approaches, had a 2nd date lined up, but blew it by trying to force a kiss when the moment wasn't conducive to it(live and learn).

 

[Mike32ct]

Yes...WOMEN ARW SUBTLE. But I'm by nature an observant people watcher...the point of and IOIs is that a woman wants your attention, she just isn't going to/doesn't have to approach. The point, she WANTA you to see the choosing sings. If I'm looking for them and don't see them...guess what? It doesn't mean women are being subtle, it means they're looking elesewhere.

Introverts can be extremely good at reading body language and IOIs. But I agree with you that having the ability to read IOIs and actually receiving IOIs are two different ballgames.

 

[thelambofdeth]

I was celibate for 12 years. I've been rejected around 45 times in the last year and a half. Approach anxiety becomes greatly reduced(or dies) after x amount of rejections. Keep doing it until it does.

AA is reduced if you get success or goodwill from women. Just approaching and getting rejected with nothing to show for it would just make you miserable and give up lol.

Introverts can be extremely good at reading body language and IOIs. But I agree with you that having the ability to read IOIs and actually receiving IOIs are two different ballgames.

That's my point...my prowess at detecting IOIs, choosing singals, interest, and body languahe when other people are receiving them, makes it that much easier to realize I don't get any.