I get farther with women when I'm nice

[Fruitbat]

You shouldnt have done that to the guy in the taxi que. Especially if he was there first.

I was 19

 

[Fruitbat]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being nice.
If that’s your personality trait then stick with it. You want to attract your equal.

The one big misconception is people associate niceness with weakness or passiveness.
I’m a nice guy but that’s not an open invitation to walk all over me. Disrespect will immediate turn into a next-ing of a female.

Girls are attracted to strength not demeanor.

give me your lunch money before I biff you

 

[Visionist]

I was 19

He could have pulled a knife on you and made you a statistic.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Two comments on this:

1. There is a difference between a nice guy and a genuine nice guy. The former is a guy who has no redeeming qualities and thinks that he can nice his way into some *****. The latter is a guy who spreads positive energy, joy, and makes everyone around him better off than they were before.

2. Bear in mind that if you see a nice guy with a girl, you're not really seeing the full picture. Just because a couple looks healthy on the surface doesn't mean they are. You have NO IDEA what the actual nature of their relationship is like. In fact, many of the "couples" you see on the streets could easily be sexless jokes of a relationships (friendzoned, or whatever else).

Being overtly "nice" or "respectful" is unlikely to foster the sort of relationship you want ie where the girl sees you as the leader and follows you, respects you as a man, and is loyal to you.

 

[sangheilios]

If she's fat you can. And the fatter she is, the nicer you can be. If she's morbidly obese then you can be really nice to her and she will let you bang her smelly gunt while you feed her from a bucket.

All these guys who are saying that "being nice works. I've experienced it myself and I'm nice to my wife" - they are either dealing with fat chicks or they are lying and fantasy-projecting and purposefully trolling.

There really needs to be full disclosure with this stuff.

I don't know, I can think of a few fat chicks that I know of who have serious attitude and would eat nice guys for breakfast without any milk.

 

[firstbornunicorn]

I do best with women when I'm genuine. That latest backfire from internet advice was after making out with a 19 year-old (that I met when she was my waitress at a restaurant) after date #1. She was leaving, we had date #2 planned (her idea) but as she left I slapped her butt. She hated it and we never met up again.

Absolute mega 10/10 babe that had high interest in me from the start and virgin internet advice ruined it.

 

[zinc4]

I was 19

I see. We have probably all had our bad drunken moments when younger.

 

[zinc4]

He could have pulled a knife on you and made you a statistic.

Yeah, i have been beaten up by groups of guys a few times for pulling drunk shenanigans. When it's one on one you still got to be careful though. Never know who you are messing with. Alcohol can really summon up the inner demons. I tried to fight an entire waffle house one night by myself and got put in the drunk tank for the night.

 

[Fruitbat]

He could have pulled a knife on you and made you a statistic.

You cant go around in life scared of confrontation.

I know it was a jackass move but I was a kid, and drunk. It was 20 years ago. I figured my mother might have wagged the finger but not the DJ forum!

 

[B80]

You cant go around in life scared of confrontation.

I know it was a jackass move but I was a kid, and drunk. It was 20 years ago. I figured my mother might have wagged the finger but not the DJ forum!

Yeah, if you drank a lot, went out a fair bit when younger, good chance you've done stuff you weren;t proud of at some point, to varying degrees. Alcohol will effect your judgement.

Don;t mean it in self-righteous way, but I didn't get in many physical incidents, for some reason senses would sharpen quickly even if really drunk/high, but had the odd altercation none the less.

I usually get loads of energy, good mood, playful when drunk, but if you're out a couple of times a week drinking heavily in clubs/bars, surrounded by 100's, thousands of other drunk people, odds are a confrontation will happen at some point. Usually joked/talked my out of things before it kicked off though.

 

[Fruitbat]

Yeah, if you drank a lot, went out a fair bit when younger, good chance you've done stuff you weren;t proud of at some point, to varying degrees. Alcohol will effect your judgement.

Don;t mean it in self-righteous way, but I didn't get in many physical incidents, for some reason senses would sharpen quickly even if really drunk/high, but had the odd altercation none the less.

I usually get loads of energy, good mood, playful when drunk, but if you're out a couple of times a week drinking heavily in clubs/bars, surrounded by 100's, thousands of other drunk people, odds are a confrontation will happen at some point. Usually joked/talked my out of things before it kicked off though.

I had lots of incidents but very rarely did they get physical. 90% of aggro is just strutting.

I follow a local football team (soccer) in England and you tend to get into a few scuffles doing that as a young lout, as I was for a short time probably 16-20.

most of it is just gesticulating and singing.

I’m not sure if you’re stateside but I wouldn’t act like that in a country full of firearms. Football aggro is a result of knowing the worst thing you’re going to get coming your way is a pint glass of beer.

 

[Visionist]

You cant go around in life scared of confrontation.

And yet you're lucky he was scared and let you skip the queue. Otherwise all sorts could (and should - threatening someone makes you open season) have happened and today you'd be telling us not to be a cvnt to random strangers.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Being neutral >>>>>>>Being nice/jerk
Reacting to supplicate/degrade both come across as "try hard"

 

[mrskinnypantz]

It’s best to be a good guy with bad boy traits and characteristics,like James Bond.

 

[Fruitbat]

And yet you're lucky he was scared and let you skip the queue. Otherwise all sorts could (and should - threatening someone makes you open season) have happened and today you'd be telling us not to be a cvnt to random strangers.

This was 20 years ago man people do this stuff when they’re young.

i also got mugged 3 times and seriously hospitalised when I was 12 (I was a big kid) due to teenage gang stuff, so it’s not like I’ve not been on the receiving end.

 

[B80]

I had lots of incidents but very rarely did they get physical. 90% of aggro is just strutting.

I follow a local football team (soccer) in England and you tend to get into a few scuffles doing that as a young lout, as I was for a short time probably 16-20.

most of it is just gesticulating and singing.

I’m not sure if you’re stateside but I wouldn’t act like that in a country full of firearms. Football aggro is a result of knowing the worst thing you’re going to get coming your way is a pint glass of beer.

Also UK and also big football fan of local team, travelled the country a lot to away games in my teens/20's so I know exactly what you mean.

 

[rjc149]

Within the context of dating, a "nice guy" is someone who is submissive, compliant, and agreeable, in the hopes that he will gain the approval of the woman he likes, and that she will eventually allow his penis into her vagina. Essentially, he uses kindness as a means to an end, not the end itself. He's using kindness as a manipulation tactic to get what he wants. This is obviously repulsive to women.

A "bad boy" is someone who is the stereotypical loud-mouthed obnoxious "alpha male" jerk, with tattoos, muscles, backwards baseball cap and who treats people like sh!t.

They are both caricatures representing the dichotomy that "dating gurus" employ to state the tired platitude "bad boys get the girls, nice guys finish last."

In my experience, obnoxious a$$holes who treat people like sh!t are angry, insecure, and socially inept, and are no more attractive to women than meek people-pleasers.

Being a "nice guy" and being a good guy are different things. You can be a good guy who is kind, treats people well, and is liked by others, while still being confident, assertive, socially fearless, and enforces personal boundaries with a willingness to walk away.

Women are generally attracted to status. A$$holes who are disliked by people don't get very high up on the social status ladder.

The exception being, of course, classically tall and handsome men who are essentially the male counterparts of spoiled brat hot women. Ie, that small segment of the human population that the black and angry red pillers b!tch and moan about here on SS.

For the rest of us, kindness with strong personal boundaries will get us farther in life -- whether with women, or in general.

 

[Grounded eagle]

Actually yeah if it was in tip top shape inside and out. Damn straight, probably more. Cars like that become classics worth even more than they were originally.

100,000 is nothing, I have seen absolutely gorgeous cars, still running beautifully with over 250,000 miles.

The exception proves the rule,it doesn’t disprove it.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

I know this is hard for people to believe, but it's true. I also notice this with my friends as well. None of them are "bad boys" or act anything remotely resembling this forum, and get hot girls.

This seems to be an internet thing of trying to be a bad boy, calling a woman out on their behavior, putting them in their place. I have done this before and it doesn't work. Women think I'm an a$$hole and want nothing to do with me.

Same thing with my male co-workers. They are nice guys, and get girls. I've been around them plenty, and seen them interact with women who are very receptive to their advances, and end up in long-term relationships as a result.

What's interesting is I also know a few guys who are jerks, and I never see them with any girls.

A lot of this seems to be internet advice that never translates into real life.

This post is full of ambiguity.

First off, you can get laid often if you disregard your self respect. You can choose women that take more than they give, you can choose to put pu$sy over your career, it all depends on your priorities.

This doormat mentality is unfortunately what most men crater to, and they'll tell you their own reasons for why it's worth it. Personally I've met few men in relationships that I would swap places with, and I'm single.

If a man prioritizes his craft over pus$y, it can come across as 'bad boy' because he won't always be available.

It's not an act. That's what forums like SS try to show men, that being a natural bad boy is just a man chasing his dreams. He naturally avoids commitment because he understands it'll slow him down.

Calling women out is something you do if you're not a doormat. It's the act of asserting personal boundaries. If a woman can't respect those then why do you want to spend time with her anyway?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

This post is full of ambiguity.

First off, you can get laid often if you disregard your self respect. You can choose women that take more than they give, you can choose to put pu$sy over your career, it all depends on your priorities.

This doormat mentality is unfortunately what most men crater to, and they'll tell you their own reasons for why it's worth it. Personally I've met few men in relationships that I would swap places with, and I'm single.

If a man prioritizes his craft over pus$y, it can come across as 'bad boy' because he won't always be available.

It's not an act. That's what forums like SS try to show men, that being a natural bad boy is just a man chasing his dreams. He naturally avoids commitment because he understands it'll slow him down.

Calling women out is something you do if you're not a doormat. It's the act of asserting personal boundaries. If a woman can't respect those then why do you want to spend time with her anyway?

Cratering to a taker is because some of those men equated relationships to prostitution and in their world view he will be a slave either way, so he chooses his master.