Yes, good girls DO cheat

[tiburon]

agree

but i believe this type of woman you are referring to would be faithful to any man or dump their current one, but wont cheat even if the guy is an ass. They respect themselves and have integrity.

Tiburon

 

[MysteryWoman]

Re: agree

Originally posted by tiburon
but i believe this type of woman you are referring to would be faithful to any man or dump their current one, but wont cheat even if the guy is an ass. They respect themselves and have integrity.

Tiburon

If a guy is an ass he deserves it, same goes to women. Well he at least deserves to be abandoned.

A woman should only respect a man, who treats her with respect and the same goes to men.

 

[Bill]

I fully agree that flaming has to stop, no room here for that sh!t fellows; if for any reason you disagree with someone, try arguments instead of insults ... I say this cuz just yesterday I was having trouble with God Of War on the tips board.

Anyways, good points have been made but there still is way too much statistics this statistics that without anyone ever giving any proofs or reference. Your numbers may very well be true but I can't agree with an argument somebody could have made up without that person backing it up somehow. And even if that 50/50 thing was true, what does it prove? in your whole life, it'd be probable for you to date only women from either one "sides of the fence"...

Agreed too that mysoginism ain't the answer, because there ARE wonderful women out there (I'm sure some of you are dating one right now) but I maintain that there is NO such thing as a good girl... she may be a good girl in your "heart" but she ain't different from the rest, she's a woman (same exact thing goes for men). Human beings are what they are, they cheat, they lie, they call other names, they kill sometimes...

This thread is getting really really interesting, and I don't see what's wrong with being "addicted" to it, if possible, like MW said .

Keep it up guys, and don't forget to back your sh!t if you come up with any statistics, should it come from psychologists or whatever...
Respect.

 

[DJ Logic]

I guess we have to make our own subjective definitions of what

"good girl" and "cheating" are

here are mine

Good Girl - A woman who respects herself enough to treat people the way she would want to be treated. Would she like to be cheated on? Hell no! In the unlikely event that she did screw some other guy, she would tell her current BF the truth because she would HATE to be lied to.

Cheating - To me any kind of sex is cheating. Oral, traditional, anal all make the cut. Making out doesnt count for me. But thats just my opinion, we all have different boundaries.

In the end, there is no fool-proof way to keep people from cheating, but I think the recipe to keep it from happening is

1. Mutual Respect
2. Open Communication
3. Mutually delicious sex
4. A little drama once in a while because we all know females are emotion junkies (dodging stones from the ladies on the board)
5. Healthy fulfilled individual lives that are not totally dependent on each other. Each party has their own space/identity.

Or you can just chain her in your basement gimp style, which seems to be the route alot of you are going!

 

[Eyecandie4ya]

Allow everyone to prove their worth is my suggestion to all who seek a LTR. Don't go into a relationship ASSUMING she will cheat but rather say that she will be giving a chance to "show me" that she is the one for me. Having a good attitude is fine and dandy but please do not be naive.

This will only get you burn

 

[tiburon]

agrre and disagree

"Good Girl - A woman who respects herself enough to treat people the way she would want to be treated. Would she like to be cheated on? Hell no! In the unlikely event that she did screw some other guy, she would tell her current BF the truth because she would HATE to be lied to."


Man i agree alot and a girl like this diserves posible considerations but a good girl is all you pointed out, with the exception that she wont cheat with anyone because she only gives herself to a man she loves and not just any freak in the street. And also she respects herself and wont lower herself that much ; she will prefer to end the relationship...thats my opinion...

They are hard to find but some are still outhere..

Tiburon

 

[sAxyguy83]

To reduce the amount of argument over points already settled and agreed upon, things about which a consensus seems to have been reached, at least by most of the posters on this thread:

1. Depending on the situation, almost any girl has the potential to cheat in some fashion (cheating defined as in some way having sexual relations with someone other than her bf).

2. It is preferable for a girl to end a relationship instead of cheating.

3. There are very few girls that will reliably do this.

4. There are some girls that will, however.

5. Most guys want their girl to be faithful if they're in a serious relationship.

6. I am somehow going to get flamed for this post.

Did I miss anything?

 

[tiburon]

smart idea saxy

Really smart idea.....

tiburon

 

[STR8UP]

Quick- you hit it right on about the social stigma attached to cheating and how it likely skews surveys on the subject. I would be willing to bet that the numbers are MUCH higher for women than stated due to women's tendency to mold a definition to their circumstance and the fact that one of the worst things in the world to a woman is for her to be labeled as or to think of herself as a slut. Men have no reason to lie.


Also, good observation on the coin thing.

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
"Emotionally cheating" is such a lame-ass Oprah-term that I can't believe it's being batted around on this board of all places.

Okay, let me ask you this.

What is it about the act of sex (or petting, or kissing, as you describe cheating) that turns the situation of her lusting for someone into a capital crime? What if she were to go on a trip with some guy to his cabin in the mountains for the weekend and sleeps in his bed and cooks him breakfast WITHOUT touching him? Is that okay? According to YOUR definition this isn't cheating.

You need to think through what you are saying. If you were to dig a little deeper you would realize that sex isn't the only way someone can stray. You are too hung up on technicalities. If your woman wants to be physically OR emotionally involved with another man she needs to be cut loose. PERIOD. What is it about the act of sex? Is it that you are repulsed by the fact that someone else has tainted your angel? Pretty ridiculous unless she's a virgin. It all comes down to her either disrespecting your relationship or not. And the line is drawn WAY before sexual touching by most guys, whether they want to admit it (or even call it cheating) or not.

Originally posted by DJ Logic
To condemn an entire gender for the possibility of infidelity reveals a disturbing trend on this board between bitter old fukks who will never trust/love again and foolish young pricks who talk out of their asses without any experience to back it up.

This post wasn't condemning anyone. I'm not the least bit bitter towards women. Life has taught me to pay attention what REALLY happens in the world as opposed to being blinded by the beautiful facade that everyone would like for me to believe is the truth.

Too many guys desperately want to believe in this romantic ideal, just as women do. Women want a knight in shining armour, men want a chaste, pure virgin. FOR THE MOST PART THEY BOTH ONLY EXIST IN FAIRY TALES. The sooner you can realize that the vast, overwhelming majority of women and men are inherently selfish and learn to live with that fact, the better off your life will be.

Originally posted by sAxyguy83
3. There are very few girls that will reliably do this.

4. There are some girls that will, however.

Exactly.

And my whole point is that the odds of finding that needle in the haystack that is also compatible with you in other ways, who is ATTRACTIVE, who is ATTRACTED TO TO YOU are indeed very, very slim. Not to mention the fact that you have no way of knowing if you are making the right choice. Starting to sound like the typical female "knight in shining armour coming to sweep me off my feet" fantasy, no?

Go ahead fellas, keep holding out for that special someone and then when you finally think you've found her put your entire heart and soul into that person on the small chance that everything is going to be rosy for all eternity. But hey, they ARE out there, aren't they?

 

[DJ Logic]

Ahh, so this post has now come full circle.

You just made alot of sense here STR8UP, especially with this bit:

Originally posted by STR8UP
Go ahead fellas, keep holding out for that special someone and then when you finally think you've found her put your entire heart and soul into that person on the small chance that everything is going to be rosy for all eternity. But hey, they ARE out there, aren't they?

I think the key here is not putting your heart and soul into anyone but yourself! This goes beyond the whole cheating debate, which at the end of the day is a subjective one (hence the length of this thread). You have tapped into a deeper truth on priorities. We should never lose focus of our dreams and ourselves just because there is a sexy woman in our lives.

I did this with my ex BIGTIME. Before I met her I was working as a painter, doing portraits, murals, etc. I was getting a pretty decent rep and then I met my LTR and she became my passion so I let my other passion fizzle out and got a steadier job.

She cheated on me without saying anything. Found out from her sister actually. We spoke recently about this whole mess (this happened years ago) and she told me she was so sorry. I kept askin her why she did it, because I still had no clue. She told me I had lost a certain something she couldnt quite place.

Now I see that I lost my soul. She was attracted in the beginning to this bold starving artist with grand dreams and ended up with a chump whose only passion was her.

Funny how we can end up agreeing with each other after 15 pages of dissent! I applaud you my friend. Perhaps you are not such a bitter old fart after all.

 

[iqqi]

have there ever been any posts longer than this one???

 

[DJ Logic]

LOL, probably the one on masturbation!

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by DJ Logic
Now I see that I lost my soul. She was attracted in the beginning to this bold starving artist with grand dreams and ended up with a chump whose only passion was her.

You have realized a truth that has taken me many years to find.

Men become very complacent in a long term relationship. They tend to lose their focus on what made them attractive in the first place. All of a sudden, when a man finds a woman who he likes who laughs at all their jokes and calls them three times a day he turns his focus from the passions that defined him as a man in favor of the typical boring ass white picket fence-cut the grass on Saturday-barbeque on Sunday routine that sends MANY women TO SOMEONE ELSE looking for that spark that DEFINED HER as a woman. Women need men to validate their existence. If the man no longer proves her with anything she can't provide for herself, SHE'S GONE, no questions asked.

Happens every day of the week. If you have the talent, the time and the patience to keep your edge with a good woman you might have a decent chance of her sticking around and remaining faithful. (still doesn't solve the issue of KNOWING whether or not she is a good woman) But if you are like MOST guys and lose your identity to your relationship there is a good chance that she will seek to fill the gaps in her life by seeking out someone else. It's all too easy to fall into that trap.

 

[tiburon]

Ill give him credit

"And my whole point is that the odds of finding that needle in the haystack that is also compatible with you in other ways, who is ATTRACTIVE, who is ATTRACTED TO TO YOU are indeed very, very slim. Not to mention the fact that you have no way of knowing if you are making the right choice. Starting to sound like the typical female "knight in shining armour coming to sweep me off my feet" fantasy, no?

Go ahead fellas, keep holding out for that special someone and then when you finally think you've found her put your entire heart and soul into that person on the small chance that everything is going to be rosy for all eternity. But hey, they ARE out there, aren't they?"
"

Very true , Very true but his is what makes life so interesting.. nevertheless you can never loose hope or you wil be consumed.

"Men become very complacent in a long term relationship. They tend to lose their focus on what made them attractive in the first place. All of a sudden, when a man finds a woman who he likes who laughs at all their jokes and calls them three times a day he turns his focus from the passions that defined him as a man in favor of the typical boring ass white picket fence-cut the grass on Saturday-barbeque on Sunday routine that sends MANY women TO SOMEONE ELSE looking for that spark that DEFINED HER as a woman. Women need men to validate their existence. If the man no longer proves her with anything she can't provide for herself, SHE'S GONE, no questions asked.

Happens every day of the week. If you have the talent, the time and the patience to keep your edge with a good woman you might have a decent chance of her sticking around and remaining faithful. (still doesn't solve the issue of KNOWING whether or not she is a good woman) But if you are like MOST guys and lose your identity to your relationship there is a good chance that she will seek to fill the gaps in her life by seeking out someone else. It's all too easy to fall into that trap."

The whole idea of always being a Challenge ..this was very well put and i suggest people read it twice.


Tiburon

 

[sux2bu]

This is the most controversial/biased thread I have ever seen. -- Perhaps the longest also.

 

[MysteryWoman]

Yes women cheat get use to it!

What double standards guys practice on these board. If there was a huge discussion like this on a female forum "Good Guys Cheat", we'd be all catagorised as bytchs, man haters and lesbians!

Thats all I have to say!

 

[DiamondMind]

Originally posted by MysteryWoman
Yes women cheat get use to it!

What double standards guys practice on these board. If there was a huge discussion like this on a female forum "Good Guys Cheat", we'd be all catagorised as bytchs, man haters and lesbians!

Thats all I have to say!

Yea, I've noticed a lot of double standards on this board over the last couple of years; it's pretty sad that the 'do as I say, not as I do' mindset is adopted by many here. Oh, I can't forget about the amount of false bravado I read here, and the humour of 'I'm a alpha male, cuz I just am'....funny. Boys town is on your left... they are all 'pimp' there too bwhahahah!

Having said that, yea, I agree that a lot of women are 'not worth it', at all, in that some of them can and will cheat, lie, etc. and just be really lame-a**ed human beings. But not all, not even close.

This reminds me of a saying I heard once (a sci-fi writer said this): "Of course 90% of sci-fi is sh*t, cuz 90% of ANYTHING is sh*t". This more or less carries over to women....and men, and music, and computer games, and movies....etc.

One of the main things I think guys should 'get' is that to go looking for women knowing most 'won't rate', and just simply learn to pick them better. Cuz once you know how to pick a good one, it will be one of the best things that could ever happen to you....really.

Good women ARE out there...just make better choices, and, don't be bitter and whiny if she ever is 'herself' and is a b*itch, a cheater, etc. cuz it's almost a for sure that all the signs that she was 'below par' are right in front of you, and YOU just ignored them or choose to go ahead anyway.

Be a man, and take full accountability for your choices and consequences. Only a insecure wuss blames anything/anyone for an 'obvious' bad choice.

Don't let your own bad choices tar the entire female race.

Learn to pick a good woman; they do exist, and they will greatly enhance your life and make you a better person. They do enhance my already great life.

Oh, yea, even the really, really sweet, caring, loving, good hearted ones you will NEVER figure out lol!

 

[BGMan]

Originally posted by STR8UP
Okay, let me ask you this.

What is it about the act of sex (or petting, or kissing, as you describe cheating) that turns the situation of her lusting for someone into a capital crime? What if she were to go on a trip with some guy to his cabin in the mountains for the weekend and sleeps in his bed and cooks him breakfast WITHOUT touching him? Is that okay? According to YOUR definition this isn't cheating.

You need to think through what you are saying. If you were to dig a little deeper you would realize that sex isn't the only way someone can stray. You are too hung up on technicalities. If your woman wants to be physically OR emotionally involved with another man she needs to be cut loose. PERIOD. What is it about the act of sex? Is it that you are repulsed by the fact that someone else has tainted your angel? Pretty ridiculous unless she's a virgin. It all comes down to her either disrespecting your relationship or not. And the line is drawn WAY before sexual touching by most guys, whether they want to admit it (or even call it cheating) or not.

Interesting point. If a guy has a girlfriend who invites a different guy over to her apartment for dinner and a movie, without actually getting physical with him, and is otherwise chasing him, and they're seeing each other and DATING, even though they're not actually making out, I'd look objectively and think, "yes, this girl obviously likes the other guy more than her boyfriend, and her boyfriend had better drop her".

In fact, I'm "the other guy" in this example. Instead of slackening off, her attraction to me has only increased over time.

Oh well, I don't believe in having a steady girlfriend anyway, except a fiancee. It's not good to get exclusive with one woman unless it feels totally right -- this includes that the man doesn't give up his hobbies and passions for a woman. My dad says that "it's the dumb hobbies and stuff that men love to do which attract women".

BGMan

 

[skip2mylou781]

Yep, you heard me correctly. Good girls cheat.

Some of you seem to hold the opinion that ALL women who latch onto one man before letting go of another are ho's, tramps, or whatever. That's ridiculous. ALL women do this.

Think back to past relationships. How long was it before your girl was in fifth gear with some other dude? Two weeks? And that's just the first YOU HEARD about it. I'll bet you'd be SHOCKED to know the truth.

So, you think she "just happened" to meet her knight in shining armour the day after you two broke up? Don't be naive. She knew EXACTLY what she was doing.

She might not have had SEX with him. She might not have even KISSED him. But you can bet your ass she KNEW she would have him wrapped around her little finger the second she dumped your sorry ass.

Some of you need a reality check. Women can't stand to be alone. They will do anything and everything to avoid it. And this usually means finding your replacement BEFORE she gives you the ax.

That's how women are. Get used to it.

this deserves a BUMP in the right direction

 

[blueguy]

Thats all I have to say!

(Referring to your earlier posts)

MysteryWoman, you prove a point on this forum against your own claim of not wanting to be dominated. I hardly doubt a man here is attracted to you regardless of what you look like because of your non-submissive nature in this thread. I'm not saying that a woman shouldn't stand up for herself against men in public, but when she starts fighting on a personal level with a man who is/was interested in her, he loses all attraction for her. His fantasy is to dominate her. Submission is the #1 turn on to a man. And there is a nickname men have for women who are not submissive to them... it's in your signature.