Yes, Girls Are CLOWNING (and SHARING!!) Your Text of Desperation

[Harry Wilmington]

Continuing on with my response to some of the responses of this post...

I don't know, you'll get a few laughs but that's it no? Now what exactly would sharing the texts get you aside from that? I'm sure for Harry it was all laughs, but the girl definitely didn't do it just for the haha's; cause you know how girls are. It was a 40 year old AFC acting like a 16 year old high schooler. Ignore, delete, move on.

For girls the communication aspect is what they get out of sharing text like this. Girls tell each other EVERYTHING as a means of bonding with other females and/or their male friends.

This girl didn't just share these text with me, but with everyone else she's close to. That's what they do - they find an event that happened in their day and rant about it to 5 or 6 different people. It's the same thing my Mom and girl cousins do, so I'm not surprised when it happens.

Guys tend to keep things closer to the chest. If something like this happened where a girl sent me odd-sounding texts, I'd either bring them here to discuss it on these boards or I'd tell ONE of my closest guy friends and that would be it. But again, that's because we don't tend to let all our business out like girls do - that's not really how we bond with each other.

And as for the guy... yes, he was 40, but there are guys on this board that are older than that who STILL haven't gotten over being shy when dealing with a girl. It ain't about the age, it's about the communication maturity level. My brother's been a pro at talking to girls forever, including when he was 16, whereas I got better at it in my mid-20s. AFC is AFC at any age.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

The two strikes rule applies to anything while dealing with women, asking for dates, texting, aiming at the kiss whatever comes in your mind.

If you text her twice and got no replies delete the number and go on...

I actually agree with the 2-text rule. The guy in this story sent her over 10 text in the course of 2 days before she responded. Clearly not interested, but he didn't get the hint.

The positive side of texting is that the ration between the words you wrote and the words in her replies is a good benchmark of her interest level as much as the amount of emoticons.

This is actually quite true. It's also a good benchmark of how well the conversation is going. If she's saying a lot of words in the beginning and starts saying less words with each response, she's probably getting bored or doing something else that's distracting her.

But again, a texting conversation shouldn't be going on long enough for her to get bored or say less. Still don't think texting is the best communication method, but when used it should only be to set up dates so you can meet her in person, and not to be sending her silly messages all day.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Agreed, one of my good friends texts girls night and day and bangs them when he chooses. Its just that work for him may not wwork for others. I text girls monday - wednesday to set up dates and then after I set the date up I just dont text them until day of to confirm im heading out to pick em up.

You ever see the movie "He's Just Not That Into You?" In the film, Justin Long's character explains how girls trip themselves up when chasing after an uninterested guy. In short, he says that women always tell other girls stories about a friend of theirs who once fell for a guy that showed signs of disinterest, but then ended up dating said friend for x-amount of years and eventually getting married.

Justin Long then tells the main girl in the movie that these "friends" are the exception, NOT the rule.

And so it is with your friend. He may be a guy who's able to text 24/7 and bang chicks, but he's the EXCEPTION, not the rule. As you can read from all the "texting gone wrong" stories on this site, the odds suggest that, more often than not, texting is KILLING these relationships.

Plus, we don't know all the details about your friend. He could be breaking the "no texting" rule, but he could also be the most attractive guy on the planet, or have a high-paying job, or any other number of factors that would allow him to have this kind of success. Regardless, it still makes him the EXCEPTION, not the rule.

Its the 21st century guys, girls like to text, get used to it.

I could care less what they LIKE to do; what I care about is what makes them attracted to ME. Girls like hanging out with gay guys too; that doesn't mean I'm going to start wearing skinny genes and acting effeminate just to get their attention!

I think what Harry is trying to get at in his numerous posts about him advocating his hate for texting is that he wnts to get the girl to think about HIM and what he is doing because he isnt texting her! Its brilliant and simple really. I've used this method to go ghost for a couple of days with different girls and none of them lose interest just because I stop contacting them for a few days .... they actually seem more receptive to my texts and ideas.

Exactly! Heck, I've used this method to get girls I've dumped or been dumped by to get interested in me again - it's amazing how much girls want to be with you when you do NOT text them and they feel THEY have to be the ones to work for YOUR attention.

 

[May_Day]

My friend was in no way interested in the guy; despite this, she gave him the number

Here is you answer, she was not interested in the guy. This is nothing new, girls always make fun of loser guys they don't like. If she liked this guy, she would not be making fun of him. She would like all the texts he sent. Your friend sounds like a typical AW showing all her friends some lame texts. So what, none of her friends even know him. If you're going to text, don't be lame, don't use it too much, then you will be fine. Did you see any texts from guys she actually liked?

I'm just getting back from L.A. after being in Virginia - a.k.a. Hurricane country

I thought Florida and North Carolina was Hurricane Country

 

[zinc4]

Hey all:

Those of you who have read some of my posts and or/post responses on here know that I'm not a big fan of texting. I believe it greatly reduces the chance you have of getting with a girl for a plethora of reasons. One of those reasons is that it makes you come across as desperate, especially when you continue to send messages despite the woman not communicating back with you in a timely manner.

The following story is absolutely true, and illustrates the point I'm talking about:

So, yesterday, one of my close girl "friends" (yes, I do have them) told me that, while she was out and about, this 40-something dude hollered at her (she's 27). I think she said he was a lawyer or something... at any rate, after spending 20 minutes telling her about some case he had worked on involving a sodomy victim (GREAT conversation opener, btw), he asked her for her phone number.

My friend was in no way interested in the guy; despite this, she gave him the number...

*PAUSE*

Okay, so what have we learned from the story so far? JUST BECAUSE SHE GIVES YOU THE NUMBER DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S INTERESTED. As my friend told me, most guys don't act all that kindly to rejection, so it's usually easier to give him some number, be it real or fake, even though they're going to just ignore him later.

Remember this lesson, 'cause it will make more sense later on...

*CONTINUED*

Almost as soon as she drove off, this dude began texting her. How do I know? She showed me the stream of text messages he had sent her since leaving the scene.

I promise you, the text he sent her made me want to cringe - they reminded me of my former AFC self, and it was all I could do to not laugh AND feel sorry for him at the same time.

A few portions of the text he sent her:

*Hey girl, it was nice meeting u, what do you do for a living? You can tell me later, I know you're probably busy picking up your son.
*Oh hey, next time I see u, I'll pay to get your car cleaned and put gas in it
*Hey, did u watch the debate?

Disheartening, right? Oh, but it gets worse - she showed me the text stream again tonight at 5 PM, and this dude had been texting her all day...

*Good morning (at 7:33 AM in the morning)
*What u doing today?
*By the way, I got something 4 u i think u might like
*U never told me what u did for work? (At 4:45 PM she finally answered him: "Academic stuff")
*Oh, that's great. So, when can I take you out? (Response: "I'm going out of town the next couple of weekends, and won't be available til November." This, despite the fact that she actually is NOT going out of town, and doesn't have much to do during those weekends at all.)
*Okay, cool. Well, I'd love to take you out to dinner in November, and pay for you to get a massage at (insert name of some expensive massage place).

At this point, she's sharing these text with me, and I'm laughing my ass off. And I'm not even one of her girlfriends, so I imagine by now she's told at least 3 other people about the lame ass dude that keeps sending her text and isn't getting the hint that she's just not interested.

Now, I could go on and on about all the things he was doing wrong (i.e. complimenting her too soon, offering up expensive stuff that she hasn't even earned yet)... but this post is about texting. And this is why I always say, time and time again in different posts...

TEXTING KILLS (or greatly reduces)YOUR CHANCES CHANCES OF GETTING WITH A GIRL.

It doesn't help build you up to her; sending more of them doesn't make her think of you as romantic - they actually ANNOY her; and all she's doing as these text of begging, pleading and desperation come in, is sharing them with her closest friends and LAUGHING at you!

You NEVER want to leave a message trail that can be used against you, be it for malicious reasons (i.e. so she can use your own typed words against you in an argument or WORSE) or to play you off like another one of her chumps she has chomping for her attention.

Now, you will hear girls say "But I like when guys text me." Yeah, well they've also been saying for years that "I want a nice guy." Real talk: what they SAY they want is not what's usually GOOD for them to get. You have to hear your way through the bullcrap and give her what she NEEDS.

What she does NOT need is some dude that's constantly texting her; what she is SAYING is she wants a guy that can communicate with her on a level that makes her feel important. And you can DO this in a wide variety of ways that are effective. Texting is NOT one of them. (And yes, for the few of you that will respond with "But I know so and so who has mad text game," they are the EXCEPTION, not the rule.)

Soooo... if a girl gives you her number, CALL her and ask her out. Don't send streams of text to her in hopes it will make her like you more. It won't. The best way to connect with a girl is face to face in PERSON. And if you DO text her, don't make it long, and don't say stuff that will get you CLOWNED later on.

-Harry Wilmington

Pathetic yes...desperate yes..however, he is clearly looking for a girl who wants or would be tempted by a sugar daddy....and unfortunately, those girls are out there...

 

[Eternal_water]

You know I am probably the biggest afc on this website or that you ever met.

But this is simply not one of my weaknesses. If anything I'm to far the other way.

My female friends (yes I have 1 or 2 myself) actually get annoyed at how long I take to txt back.....if I txt back at all.


ps: I'm not sure whether to believe the op that the guy actually sent those or not, it seems to extreme to be plausible.

That said, even if it is true (still hard to believe), the girl is still a b1tch for showing them off.

 

[om1xr]

Its not texting that make girls lose interest its all about the Attention and Challenge because people love to chase what is hard to get or what they can't get (and specially girls)
so the bottom line what makes something precious and valuable its to be RARE
so be rare
ps: there is a lot of BS and Overanalyzing in this forums

 

[May_Day]

ps: I'm not sure whether to believe the op that the guy actually sent those or not, it seems to extreme to be plausible.

That said, even if it is true (still hard to believe), the girl is still a b1tch for showing them off.

I don't believe it either, if you look at all of his threads, he writes each one very carefully to support his point of view. All of them give very passive advice. Not to mention, he has an eBook he is trying to promote on here. I could write a thread telling you that smoking is good for you, if I carefully craft it to present a smokers point of view. Girls only make fun of guys that they don't like. If she liked this guy, any texts he sent she would like and respond to them. I've texted girls since I had a phone and it never hurt me.